Will My Daughter Be Behind in Kindergarten If She Doesn't Go to VPK?

It is such a good thing the VPK. Look into schools NOW because you will have to file the paperwork and pick a school to enroll her in. My daughter is in VPK right now, and she attends a school in gainesville, dont know if you are in town or not. But its great, it will get her acclimated to the school environment and stuff. If you are in gainesville, let me know because I highly recommend my daughters school for VPK. Good luck, it is totally worth it.

I personally did not send my children to preschool. I was thinking along the same lines as you with school for a long time. So I taught them a little at home and just enjoyed their company as vice versa. They did just fine, and were not overwhelmed when they went to school. I hope this helps.

This is all stuff you can teach her at home. I'm not big on the idea either. Pretty soon there will be newborn school. :)

I asked a similar question a couple of weeks ago and got a lot of great answers. However, I just wanted to share that my now 12 y/o did NOT go to preschool and went straight to kindergarten at age 4 yrs, 10 months. She has never had a problem in school, was always social, adhered to kindergarten format from day 1 (following directions, circle time, Etc) and believe it or not was always at the top of her class. Her teachers always commented on how impressed they were with her. She is a GATE student with a 4.0 GPA. I really listened to my instincts when I didn’t send her. Do what you think is best for your child. Only you can make that decision but just wanted you to know that there are children that DO succeed that do not go to preschool. Although I am sending my son who is 4 ½ . Honestly it was the answers I got when I asked this question that was a defining moment in my decision because I had been struggling with it. My son is very opposite from my daughter in that he is very shy and very clingy, doesn’t easily make friends. I believe everyone that said I should send him at least 2 days a week, ½ days, will lay a foundation for him for when he does start going 5 days a week, which could be very traumatic for him if I didn’t prepare him. It’s true that he will do well in learning to take directions from someone other than me and start to socialize with someone other than me! Best of luck with your decision!! All the moms on this site really helped me and I’m sure they will help you too!

Hi Megan,

Will your child be behind? No. Are there benefits? Yes. Are there negatives as well? Yes. I did not send my children to pre-K nor did I send them to public school. Then we get into the homeschool thing :)

Kindergarten came along in the 60s. Before that, the first milestone was First Grade...because it came first. If you look at statistics, the generations past had high higher academic scores and achievements and a high school graduate in 1935 would be equivalent to a Master's degree graduate now. Everything is perspective. If you don't feel compelled to send your daughter then I would not send her. There is a common thought within the education community that most kids really don't start learning in a classroom setting until they are 7 (for girls) and 9 (for boys). This doesn't mean they don't learn. It just means that the formal structure is not the most conducive for education.

I'm a college educated homeschooling mom and this is also the opinion of my sister who has her masters in Education as well as Social Work. She developed and ran a school for teenage boys that were somewhere between 2nd and 5th grade level work. She was able to catch them ALL up to grade level by the end of the first school year. Kids can learn when they are taught.

Hope this helped!

M.

Even before VPK, my daughter always asked to go to school and from the first day, she loves it and has learned more than I could ever teach her. She’s only gone M/W/F for 5 hours, has lunch with her friends, listens to other adults, gets into a routine for school, has little subjects and easy little bits of homework. She does projects, paints, draws, plays house with her friends, does show-and-tell, learns about animals, colors, shapes, words, seasons, math, and so so so much more. I think it’s a great program, and the fact that it’s free and it provides that little bit of extra in her life, is really wonderful. Plus, the teachers know the Kindergarten curriculum and teach toward that (eg. in kindergarten, a child must spell their name with the correct uppercase/lowercase in order for them to have achieved “writing name” (eg. Elaine NOT ElAine).

I too was on the fence about putting her in VPK with all the years of school ahead of her, and that’s why I chose a program of 3 days, so that still gives her 2 days at home. Plus, it’s not really ‘school’ – they do learn, but the “teaching” is done in such a way (through play, painting, projects, songs and so many other fun stuff) that they don’t realize they’re learning. Before VPK, I tried so hard to get my daughter to know the days of the week and months of the year. Within the first 2 weeks, she came home reciting them.

I highly recommend the VPK program. I adore my daughter’s teachers and I am amazed at all the things she has accomplished and participated in. Plus, she loves it, has made so many new friends and she’s already familiar to what school is all about, what’s expected of her and she won’t be shocked when she goes to school for the 5 full days a week.

I believe it is very important for your child. Kids now a days are expected to already know how to read and write before entering kindergarten. If shes not prepared she will be a step behind the others and could struggle. How does she interact and play with other kids? If shes not around other kids very often then I would also recommend pre-k so she can learn teamwork. They also learn a lot of arts, more than I can provide.

With this, do your research through the internet, friends, etc. Visit the school a couple of times with your kid. Watch their actions to determine if they like it too. Look up their records with your local child care coucil for violations. Aask for references and call on them. Its not easy finding a place and both yiu and your child need to be happy with the place you pick. If she doesn't like the teachers she wont learn and grow. Trust your instinct, if something doesn't feel right or you get a bad vibe cross that one off your list. good luck.

I think your right! She has enough school ahead of her. I feel the same with my 4 year old boy.

I have three children and my two oldest ones never went to pre-k. They are doing great in the grade that they are in right now and they were never held back.
My third child just turned 4 and I will not send him to pre-k.

I feel the same way that you do, why start them early - they will have so much to do when they do start K.

This is what they need for your child to know when they start K.
Your child needs to know
* the ABC's in order and out of order.

They need to have a good idea on how to write the letters of the alphabet.

* count to 20 and by the end of K they need to know how to count to 100.
* know the colors.
* shapes
* know the days of the week.
* your child needs to know how to write their name (first and last).
* they need to be able to share and stand in a line (without moving around).
* to use the bathroom alone.
* needs to know how to sit still at reading time and work time.
Because some little ones have alot of energy, and there is nothing wrong with that. But it can get a child in trouble if they do not know how to sit still and be quite when asked to.

You can work on all of this at home on your own time.

You should go online and look up (dolch words) it would be great for your little one to know the dolch words for K and if your child masters these and needs more move on to the 1st grade dolch words.

Check out www.spellingcity.com if your little one is not ready for what they offer then save it in your favorites and work on it when they get into K.

I wish you all the best and have a wonderful day.
= )

i sent my daughter to vpk. i didn't want to do it and was very nervous about her being away from home, etc. i also taught her at home with those preschool books you can get at walmart, but eventually decided to put her in vpk bc a teacher/friend of mine said that they really do benefit from going. they learn early sightwords, how to line up, teach them to open their own food and eat w/in a specified time like they have to at school. also some teach math, science, reading, etc. the good schools are set up just like a kindergarden however the teaching is more relaxed. i believe she benefited greatly from all of this. she socialized well, etc. most kids going in to kindergarden have a hard time with the lineup and walking in lines, also listening to when the teacher says to quiet down. i am also going to be sending my son. my daughter is also going to be tested for gifted. vpk not only focuses on the reading (which is what most parents solely focus on), but also the other essentials to kindergarden learining

I did not opt out, but do know some parents that did. One child was okay, but only because Mom did her own lessons at home. She taught him how to sound letters, write letters, write numbers, understand basic math (bigger, smaller, etc.) and started him on basic sight words. This child has done okay so far his first kindergarten year. The other children I know that did not do VPK did not have the same environment at home. They are way behind and one of the little girls, I have heard, has become quite depressed because of her friends at school being able to do things in class that she cannot. I don't think that they are making fun of her, but she has become overly sensitive that she doesn't know the answers or how to sound things out when the teacher calls on her.

I understand you not wanting to burn them out, but if you find the right VPK program it can also be fun for them. Learning should be fun and should be tought by parents as being fun. However, if you get a bad program/teacher I suppose it could be harder on them.

It is a hard decision, but I say you should do it for your child. It isn't a long day - only a few hours. In addition, kids that do not do VPK that enter the school system never having done any kind of schooling, really hold back the class because the teachers have to focus on them. And then there is the negative side of that as well - what if they don't focus on your child to help them catch up? Then your child will be behind from the get go and it is hard to catch up! VPK is a good foundation.

Good luck on what ever you decide.

We did not send our daughter to VPK and she is doing great in Kindergarten this year. I worked with her at home in fun ways and we used a lot of preschool workbooks last year. She is loving Kindergarten now and right where she needs to be. I loved having her home that extra year.

I actually think its' a good idea for them. Usually VPK is only until 12 anyway. So she will only have to be there a few hours. And it also helps them get ready so when they actually start kindergarten.

I started my oldest (turning 4 in March) in PK3 this year two morning a week, and she will go to VPK next year. I have chosen this path because I also have a 2yo and 6 month old at home too, and I don't feel like I have the ability to spend enough time with her stimulating her intelligence. She is such an intelligent child and I felt like I was stunting her growth in that department by keeping her home. If she was an only child, I think I would have chosen to keep her home and teach her myself though.

You can accomplish everything you need to accomplish by reading to her and playing with her and including her in your day to day life. Think of all the "math" you do in the kitchen. Let her help by counting and sorting stuff. Read, read, read, read, read!
Did you teach her to walk, talk, eat?? You can also teach her to love learning.
None of my kids has ever gone to VPK. Now, I homeschool, but socially and academically they are all doing fine.
I think even K has gotten too academic. Remember when it was all about learning through play and story time?

i think a lot of kids benefit from the time at home with their parents. it is socially accepted to put your kids in "school" or VPK/daycare because so many people can not stay home. if your child is behind in any way they are still at the age where they will catch up to the rest of the class quickly. and the skills that your child learns while at home are not really taught at school.

They all catch up eventually academically, so unless she has a learning disability, there's no problem there.... The bigger concern, from a teacher's point of view, is socially. Depending on your child's personality, do you think she'll have a hard time being away from you? Do you think it will be rough going from zero school to ALL DAY school? Will she understand things like taking turns and sharing and dealing with kids who aren't always kind to her? These are the important things they learn at preschool. If she has never been in a preschool environment, you may want to consider a few hours a week of preschool. The V in VPK is voluntary. You don't HAVE to send her to school every day. Most kids LOVE preschool-- it's not the chore it will be when they're older. Find a school that wll allow her to attend just a few hours a couple of days a week and send her. She'll love it!

Hi Megan,
I have no practical experience, as my daughter is only 2. But my opinion is that our children are little such a very short time. What's the rush in starting them in school? I think that they can learn just as much, if not more, from Mommy and Daddy. If your child has some other type of social interaction with other children, there should be no disadvantage to keeping her home with you for one more year. Treasure the time you have with your child and don't worry about pressure from others.
Enjoy,
R.

There is something to be said about preschool preparing children for the school setting - they learn to sit in a classroom, raise their hands, take turns, participate in groups, have playtime, worktime, etc. I also saw (as a daily volunteer in Kindergarten) that the children who knew their ABCs, numbers, shapes, colors, etc., WERE ahead of the children who were not introduced to these things (not saying that you aren't doing this, but some parents simply don't & it appeared to me to be a problem). With so very many children in pre-K, half the class was grasping the concepts while the other half were still learning how to just sit in their seats, crying because they haven't been separated from caregivers for that period of time, left with a bunch of strange children, simply didn't know how to function in the setting. The teachers are often by themselves with 18 or so kids to supervise. Getting them all "on-task" isn't easy, especially when someone's crying, someone's poking at another kid, and yet another kid is roaming around playing with stuff. There's a lot of redirection going on & it makes it difficult when there's actually a lesson attempted to be taught. Kindergarten isn't like it was when we were in it. I think it's helpful to offer your child that head-start, preparing them for the classroom setting - it's such a huge adjustment.

As far as being developmentally inappropriate, children's little brains are like SPONGES & they CAN learn so much more than you think - there's no testing or grading or higher expectations in pre-K, just a lot of learning what it's like to be in school, learning a few basics that they CAN easily grasp, & preparing them to be open to future experiences.

Of course, it's YOUR decision to make for YOUR child's future & you have to do the best you can, with information & different recommendations from everywhere. How nice to have a place to ask your ?s & see what opinions exist - maybe once in awhile someone offers up something good! I hope so! Good luck to you -

What area are you in? I was on the fence about Pre K - VPK as well - and at the last minute decided that we should go forward with it so that she wouldn't be behind. We are in Winter Haven - and we chose High Point Pre-K, and she was in the VPK program. It turned out great. 1st - the VPK program is only 1/2 day if you do it during the school year, or full day if you do it over the summer program. My dauther loved loved loved it. She made some great friends, learned a bunch in a fun, structured, loving atmosphere. As it turned out - 4 of the other kids in her Pre-K made it into the same kindergarten class that she is in. (a miracle as we had to apply online for this magnet school - and out of 900+ applications, for roughly 45 positions it is amazing that we ended up with some familiar faces). Anyway - the 1/2 day pre-k days were great for helping her get used to the idea of not being with me all day, and it wasn't such a shock for her to go full day for Kindergarten when it started in the fall. I'm the "reading mom" in her class one day a week now - and I can totally tell a difference between the kids that wen to Pre-K and the ones that didn't. I tell you, when I was in kindergarten - I think we were learning ABCs and colors and how to spell / write our name. These kindergartners are READING books, writing 2-3 sentance stories, and all kinds of stuff. It's truly amazing.
I'm not sure where you are, but if you are in Winter Haven - I can highly, highly recommend High Point Pre-K. If you are not in Winter Haven - I heard that they are owned by someone who has like 7 - 10 more in the area between Winter Haven, Lake Alfred, Lakeland etc. I was in the office one day - and the director of the Winter Haven school had some kind of report that she was reviewing. She told me that the kids from High Point Pre -K - were testing higher in kindergarten than any of the other kids in Polk County.
Good luck!

The only reason to send a child at 4 to a program is to socialize and learn how to take direction and have fun! The State VPK program is highly academic and most 4 yr olds should not even be writing yet. Just because they can, does not make it that they should. The program is lacking in sensory motor activity and movement which are way more important to focus on for later learning. Let nature take it's course and let your child develop without learning academics at 4. She will have an easier time in school later then the kids who were forced through it in VPK. Focus on right brained things such as music, art, dance, moving the body and creating.

Pre-K is your decision. I did send my daughter to Pre-K for entirely selfish reasons (I needed a break during the day!), but I don't feel that it was a crucial experience for her. In fact, she frequently missed days for vacations and when we had family in town. As long as your daughter interacts with other children on a regular basis and has lots of exposure to words/reading, she'll be just fine in kindergarten. Do what's right for you and your family.

Children that get little or no educational stimulation at home (don't know their ABC's, numbers, etc) by Kindergarten are the ones that hold back the class. If you can teach her all the necessary skills she'll need by Kindergarten, and have the time, by all means keep her at home. Also, some children need the social interaction and skills that being with other children in a classroom setting provides, which was the main reason I sent my youngest to one. It helped him greatly in that area. He's now in Kindergarten and doing very well both academically and socially. Just do what feels right to you for your child. :)

My daughter is now in Kindergarten and she went to a great pre-school for VPK last year and I think it has made all the difference for her. She is in advanced reading now and thriving at school. In VPK they lay out the skills that the kids will need in Kindergarten not just academics it's more social skills and following directions so when they get to K they are ready to jump into the academics. They learn to write their name, recognize letters and numbers and write them. But they also learn to use scissors and walk in a single file line with other kids quietly, how to raise their hand, and just how to interact with other kids. Of course I beleive that only you know whats right for your child but my experience with VPK for my daughter was a very good one and she loved to go everyday and still does now in K. One other thing is that it was obvious at the beginning of the year which kids went to VPK and which ones did not. Two kids in her class are still having problems writing letters because they were never taught any writing before K, not even their name. Most kids in the class can now write about three short sentences if you give them a easy subject to write it on. Sorry this became very long! I would just do your research and visit a few pre-school's in your area and see how you feel about it then and if you still don't want to send her then make the comittment to teach her at home to be ready for K!
Good Luck!

I am Director of a Pre-k Center and I am for the VPK program. If you decide not to send your child to a VPK program that's fine but make sure you work with your child at home so he/she will be ready for kindergarten. Children who attend VPK are ready for kindergarten socially, emotionally, cognatively and physically. It is good for children who are in pre-k because they get a chance to socialize with each other and their teachers and they get used to being in a classroom setting. Some children that are not used to pre-school have a hard time adjusting when they go to kindergarten.

uf you do some social group structured activities with her and then make sure she's ready for K academically she should be all right.
by the first day of K she should be able to write her first and last name, in both upper case and lower case, if possible, otherwise all uppercase.
she should know ALL her letters by looking at them printed randomly both upper and lower case and be able to say what sound they make.
she should know how to count to at least 20 and know how to take manipulatives (small objects) and add them, only like one cheerio and three cheerios and then count them all up to see she has four cheerios...
she should know how to use scissors (safety ones), hold a pencil correctly (fat ones), glue and glue stick, how to peel the back off of foam shapes, etc.

I sent my child to a church run vpk and it was awesome. it was m - f from 9-1. I've heard that there are also 3 day a week programs too. I'd say if you are concerned about her not learning, you can print stuff out online and 'teach' her once a week. My son did the alphabet, colors, numbers etc. But for the most part, its about learning to adapt to the structure of classrooms and how to socialize with other children, how to follow instructions etc. I asked my son's kindergarten teacher if she could tell the difference between vpk kids and those who didn't go and she said not really. I think it would depend on your child. My second son will be going to vpk this upcoming fall and it is going to be a hard process for him. Harder than for my first son. He doesn't like schedule changes, new people, new kids etc. I definately am glad VPK is free, because we could never just send him straight to Kindergarten without any preparation like VPK.
Best of luck to you!
Jen M.
Mom of 3 boys ages 6, 3 1/2, and 2 :)

Whether you send her to pre-K or keep her home.....she still needs Pre-k curriculum. My son (oldest) did not go to preschool, I taught him pre-k at home, and then he started half day Kindergarten. He does great and is a top student now in 2nd grade. The school then switched to full day Kindergarten, so for my daughter (younger) I decided to send her to 3day/week preschool for the adjustment of being without me since she would face the all day Kindergarten. She does great now in Kindergarten and reads far beyond her age. I completly understand your view. I think that too much is expected of our kids at such a young age. You should check with the Kindergarten School that she will be attending and see what they expect of a child entering Kindergarten. They usually have a list that includes things like writing their name, knowing their numbers and letters, using scissors etc. They should be able to provide you with a list and then you can work with her at home and she'll be fine. Just think of it as if you are "homeschooling" her for Pre-K.......and do lots of "field trips"!!!!! Have fun!!!!

The state funds VPK for a reason and that reason is #1 so many children are coming into kindergarden with social skill issues and not having the basic foundation laid for reading and other skills. Pre school teachers are now having the state train them in all the requirements that they will need to cover before the children enter kindergarden. If you want your child to have a great school experience in kindergarden I would strongly recommend VPK. Plus that it is paid for by the state for the 3 instructional hour that VPK covers each day. I have been caring for children for 28 years and trust me kindergarden is not what it use to be. Empower your child with anything that you can to lead them to a successful school experience for years to come. VPK has to follow state guide lines in what they want the children to be taught but along with that the children need to have fun, singing and most important is the socializing skills and following a daily schedule.
Lil Campers Academy is a wonderful place.

Best of luck,

she will not be "burned out " because she goes to preschool..

our preschool has 2 relatively structured periods of 20 minutes each.and the rest is play.. which is exactly what a 4 year old should do.

preschool has done wonders for my shy child.. I dont know what she has learned academically but she can go potty independently now without fear...(in the beginning she would poop at schol) she talks toall the teachers easily.. she plays with some kids... she is comfortable and confident in her classroom without mom nearby.

find a 2 day a week 1/2 day program and send her.. it will be good for her..

I did not send any of my 4 children (25,22,14,11) to pre-k or my 6 year old grandson. They all have been excellent students, have been in honors, graduated hs early and now my 1st grade grandson has been reading above level since Feb of kindergarten and now they started putting him 1 day a week into second grade math.
I believe it is an individuals choice on pre k, unless there is a disability as mentioned before. I did not believe in it as there were always children around to have the social aspect and I worked with them on the academic side. Good luck with your decision.

I have 2 girls, 12 & 14. One went the Pre-k One did not. My oldest is an August birthday, therefore started Kindergarden very young. I did not want to send her to pre-school. I did however do a lot at home. They need to know letter recognition, and be able to write there name before Kindergarten. They should know basic things like colors and shapes, books read left to right, top to bottom, numbers. If you are working on all this at home I would not be to concerned. My younger daughter is a very social person, and needed some away from mommy. I sent her to a private pre-k, before VPK. She learned way more than I taught my older daughter at home, and had a very hard time in public school Kindergarten, because she already knew what they were teaching. It is important that they learn what they need to for kindergarten. How they learn it is up to you. Trust yourself and do what you think is best for your family. If I am correct in what I have heard about VPK though, it is only a part time thing. It may be a good time for you to make appointments, and run errands. It is always something worht looking into.

I'm the Director of a child care learning center. I agree that Pre-K focuses too much on "school work" instead of creative learning, but in the long run it would be the most beneficial to have your child in Pre-K. I actually recommend parents to enroll their children in daycare at atleast the age of 2 years old. These are crucial years in learning. Even if it's not full-time care, part-time is better than nothing at all. However, VPK and Georgia Pre-K has strict rules and they have to maintain a great attendance record. Definitely try Pre-K out. If you don't like her you can disenroll at any time.

As a preschool owner I agree with you that children will be going to school for a very long time, however there is so much more to preschool then academics. Social skills are so much more important then anything academic she will learn at that level. You do have options and do not have to send her everyday, but I would consider it for social time with her peers. I would be more concerned with her having to adjust to school and separation in kindergarten verses pre-k. If she has difficulty leaving you and adjusting that could be an issue for her. I think it is wonderful that you want to hold on to your little girl as long as you can, but it may not be the best decision for her. On the flip side if she is social with other activities and is okay when she is not with you then I wouldn't worry about her academically. Good luck in whatever you decide.

VPK, in my opinion is for parents who either work, or for the mom who can't wait to get some peace and quiet. This is not meant to offend anyone, it's just my perception of what "pre-school" really is. I have been a full time stay at home mother for the past 10 years, my youngest is 3 1/2 years old. I have 3 children. I cannot tell you how infuriating it makes me when people, whose intentions may be innocent, ask me about VPK. My first two daughters did NOT go to pre-school. Why? Because I quit my job to be a full time stay at home mother. What my children learned prior to kindergarten was taught by me. I was there for my daughters, just like I will be for my last baby, every step of the way. Loving them, caring for them, nurturing them. Yes, you are so right. They will spend nearly half of their lives in school and the rest of it will be spent working in their chosen career. Both of my daughters did excellent in kindergarten and without pre school! I taught them how to tie their shoes, how to count, say their ABC's, their colors. I taught them how to share and be kind....and to be carefree at home. It's voluntary because it's not mandatory. In my eyes, it's free day care. Keep your little home and enjoy this time together. It goes by much too quickly. And as for socialization, unless you live on a remote island in the middle of the ocean, socialization is NOT a problem like so many people will have you believe. Remember that everyone has a unique personality and it will show in how they interact with others. Pre school is not going to alter or change a timid child's personality and suddenly make a timid child the life of the party. They will adapt to kindergarten just fine...just as they are.

I have not read all the other responses, so I apologize if this is repetitive. My son is 15. He did not go to any pre-school program (there wasn't vpk then anyway). Now he is in high school honors classes, gets all a's and b's, is an Eagle Scout, plays school and travel volleyball, is in the band, active at church, etc. Get the point? He is academically and socially equipped for life. Of course, we didn't sit home watching tv all day. We did age-appropriate activities. We learned about bugs by going to the park and watching them. Same with dirt, birds, etc. He was into space, so we went to Kennedy Space Center. We went to museums, nature centers, etc. We were social at church, the park, etc. It is the year I miss most! :( I would give LOTS to go back to the year he was 4! Their little brains are sponges! They can learn anything they are interested in, and they are so much fun! YOU can learn a lot, too! Teach him whatever he wants to know. Yes, he should know his colors, numbers, letters, etc upon entering K. But spend the year having fun learning that stuff through life. You don't get this time back, so enjoy it! Hope this helps!