My husband and I split childcare with our 18 month old daughter. Lately, my daughter has been really cranky, crying for much of the time that I am with her and getting easily frustrated with everything she does. My husband has said she only behaves this way with me. Why on earth would this be?? It is making me a little batty!
Children sometimes behave worse for "mom" because that is who they feel safest with. She can let her frustrations show when she is with you, and you will still be there for her. I know this is frustrating, but maybe you can take it as a sign of all yoiu are doing well for her?
No offense intended, but are you divorced? I ask b/c you wrote that your husband & you "split childcare." If you are, I think this could be a big part of the issue & I would question the differences in how he treats her vs. you. Maybe he lets her do anything she wants in order to make you appear the bad guy. Maybe he's doing something intentional. f not, I totally apologize for misreading your post. My 15mo. old daughter plays more "games" w/ me than my husband. Maybe girls are hard wired to give their moms trouble. Maybe it's the whole Oedipus / Electra complex where girls (For lack of a better description) want to be kind of married to Daddy & boys married to MOmmy.
My hubby don't "put up" with the crankiness as much as I do. Plus, I'm more willing to pick-up my 2 yr old then my hubby is, so my son knows if he is cranky mommy will pick him up and cuddle with him. Guess I just let the kids "walk" on me more then daddy does. I don't "roar" as loud as daddy does either, and sometimes it drives me nuts to the point of sitting down and crying about it (hormons suck when you are prego). If the kids get me to that point - I try to hide it, but one of the three ususally find me and let the other know that mommy is crying - sometimes they start acting better because they know mommy was hurt by the way they are acting.
You see mommy doesn't like crying around the kids... I was taught every young not to show emotion to anyone. That it is to be show only to yourself - so I don't like like them seeing me upset. My sister is the same way... at my grandma's funeral I didn't cry till my hubby took the kids home and I looked up to that woman with everything I am! But I can't let them see that side of mommy.
Only thing I can suggest - is try not to put up with the crankiness. It's hard for me to do as well... but if you want her to stop the action - you have to show her it's not accepted.
Good luck!
It could be anything from the time of day you and she are together to something like certain foods she's eating while with him or over stimulating activities with your hubby right before you get the hand off of your little one. It could simply be that she's really comfortable letting her grumpier side show with you. Or it could be hubby isn't as keen as picking up on her grumpiness, even though its surely happening.
Don't take it too personally or be too hard on yourself, mom....this too shall pass. Wait til she's a teen girl and the boys coming home with her start really bugging your hubby. You will surely feel the tides turning then....LOL
