T.~
I also stay at home. I do in-home daycare, and take care of 7 kids ages 10mos-4yrs. From 1pm to about 3pm EVERYDAY, is MY time. We have, what I call, "QUIET TIME". The 3 younger kids nap in their pack-n-plays, while the 4 older kids lay on the couch and watch a movie. Some days, like today they all nap. However, some days 1 or 2 kids won't nap. It's still "QUIET TIME", they don't have to nap, but they need to be quiet and watch the movie or read books, color or anything QUIET. If they don't find something quiet, they won't get a snack. My daughters are 4 and 5, and they don't always take naps. It is tough, becasue we moms need our time too. My advice would be to make sure they now it is quiet time. Make it an actual part of the day, like "lunch time", "snack time", "bed time", "bath time" and now "QUIET TIME". My kids get excited about quiet time. Before quiet time is clean up time, and who ever cleans up the best gets to pick the movie. Give them incentives, if they are quiet during "quiet time", they get to pick their own snack. Good Luck! I hope you get "your time" back.
~J.