What Do You and Your Husband Talk About?

When my husband is working that is all he talks about.It gets worst as he gets older.My kids are all grown and after 30 years of marriage with him,I just let him ramble on.It is a ego thing with him.I talk to other friends and family to keep my sanity!

When we really sit and talk, like around the firepit or on the back porch, it is interesting conversation. We talk about each others childhood, grandparents, friends, death...all kinds of things. We ask each other fantasy questions. When you mix a glass or two of wine in there, the conversation is especially interesting ;)

On other nights it is mostly what we did that day (work or otherwise), something big on the news, the kids, etc. We are not really big into political conversation.

I talk about literally everything that Molly B. talks with her husband about as well as humorous stuff. We find a lot of things funny, and my husband is a fantastic comedian:)

(Oh, except we aren't going to have a baby, so we don't talk about that:))

Oh my! Me and hubs arent going to sound too smart. We talk about sex, dinner, the weekend, the kids, bills, our friends, how he should rub my back, his work, how I do more than him ;), our new coming baby, our future, we do talk about gas prices!! lol

Everything!! The world, religion, politics, art, entertainment, our family, our son, his work, funny things we read, our project ideas, our future plans, our dreams, everything!! One of the reasons we started dating (and of course got married) is because we never got bored with our conversation. I really love talking to him and we are never short on interesting topics. We are both very curious about the world and different viewpoints. We do only have 1 son and don't plan on having anymore. I think if we had more children, it might be different.

Hey good question. I know that over 50% consumes both my current husband and my ex... even after we divorced he would call me up and end up talking about his work. My poor daughter would complain... all dad does is talk to me about his work and she was a little girl back then! Guys are cluless when it comes to knowing just how much they talk about work. They want our undivided attention but seem really impatient when we talk about our work....
I mean lately my husband and I have been discussing a trip we are planning but it is surrounding when he gets off of WORK! I guess as wives we should just be glad that they have jobs!

I think your situation is probably pretty typical. And men don't usually want to discuss kid things the way we women do.

It's reasonable that your different lives lead you to have differing interests and topics of conversation. That's why I think it's really important for hubbies and wives to have at least one hobby or interest that they share.

I'm still trying to find one for me and my husband, especially since the kids are going to be gone in a couple of years.

Molly's answer is funny.

Neither of us talks about our job 90% of the time, but we do tell stories about work. He tells personal things about the coworkers that I know. We talk about any volunteer work we're each doing, events in our community, we talk about current events and the arts, books and tv shows, things that need doing around the house. We also talk a lot about the kids, my husband keeping me up to date on scout activities, me keeping him up to date on the sweet 16 planning and the college visits and school events coming up for the kids. Your husband should want to talk about the kids. They aren't an amusing hobby that you have, they are his children. It sounds like he is a disinterested observer - if he works that much, he isn't seeing much of the kids or doing much of the parenting, so he should be MORE interested in what's going on with them since he is not there to see it. I don't think your problem is that you aren't reading Newsweek, the problem is that your husband is disinterested in his family and being a husband and father.

I would LOVE for my DH to talk about work more, he can't .
We talk about everything but work. Through out the day I browse the net look at actually news, electronic news,ie new gadgets , it helps me not feel like all I do is kids and house.

If he's having a bad day he may just need to vent and he feels safe venting to you.
I would sit down with him and say every night you can have say an hr of work talk then we go to something else. And you limit your chit chat about the kids as well, sometimes the same topics can get really boring to both sides.

My husband talks about work a lot because he's in sales and goes to people's homes daily. LOTS to talk about there! We're also really political creatures and keep up w/ world events. He listens to talk radio and news radio while he drives and I read various papers, so we're always talking about what we've learned during the day. And of course, we talk about our daughter! And latest news of family/friends. I'd love to talk about what I'd like to "do" to the house more, but that conversation doesn't seem to go very far, hahaha!

we talk sports, weather, kids, home projects, extended family issues, friends, work everything really, hes my best friend and im his we share everything. i would say he talks about work 3% of the time that would be the 10 mins after he gets home and i ask how his day was

It helps me to think about the child rearing years as a stage in life. Our dating days and years before children was similarly a stage. Neither is going to go on forever and it will be different once the children are out of the house. Yes, work is his mindset. No, most husbands are not as interested in our children's minutest details - and much less our neighbors' goings on. We are relational beings as women, for the most part. That is why we have mother, sister and girl friends who are all interested in those things.

I also remember back to when we were dating, how I chose to be interested in the NY Giants or the Reformation - it was interesting because he was interested in it.

So, I find that I need to make sure I have enough girl talk time with my girl friends. My husband is a great guy - but even he cannot absorb all my emotional energy and needs. Our marriage is a lot happier when I am not looking to him for all or even most of my relational talking needs. My mother, thankfully, cannot get enough of the 'you won't believe what Emma said today' stories.

I feel a lot more connected to my husband when he and I have had time together without the kids - not spending a lot of money on a big date - but making sure they are in bed so we can have an hour without electronic media, just to sit and have a glass of wine together, sitting on the couch. A book which was really helpful for me was G. Chapman's "The Five Love Languages". It helps one identify how I, my spouse and my children feel loved (touch, time, words of encouragement, gifts, and one more). It so helped me - because I gave the kind of love I wanted - and so did my husband!

Keep up the good work.

Have you seen the movie Date Night ? It is hilarious. A fun idea came to us to help with fun conversation from that movie. The two people in the movie go to restaurants and try to make up a story about what the family, couple, or friends are thinking about from accross the room. It was a funny scene and gave me a fun " ice breaker " as a conversation with your loved one that is not your everyday stresses in life.

We make fun of our in-laws . We talk about our kids. Our jobs. Our dream vacations. Our upcoming trips. Our Friends. We chat about Stuff from the shows we watch. We talk about God. We talk about how we are going to save for College and Retirment.

We talk about work a lot because we both work at the same place. We also talk about everything else you could possibly talk about. Politics, kids, family, shopping, groceries...you name it, we talk about it! We never get annoyed with each other for talking about something, because we figure it must be important to them, or they wouldn't be talking about it.

I feel like such a dud sometimes because I'm a SAHM and all I talk about are the kids, other Moms, other Moms kids, who is snobby, who is not snobby, what's on sale at the supermarket, what's for dinner, the latest Charlie Sheen interview, the neighbors, etc. Although a couple cars in our neighborhood have been burglarized so that was "exciting" to talk about.

I used to ask my husband about work but HE doesn't even seem interested in talking about it, so I usually don't even bother anymore.

When we DO sit and talk, I will say, we talk about our goals, finances, house projects we'd like to do, possible future vacations, and of course- the kids and what we'd like to see them doing when they grow up. :-)

This was a great question-
Lynsey

My husband talks about his job maybe 10% of the time. We talk about our families about 50%, news 10%, our household 30%.

yeah, well, i can't get mine to talk to me much about anything unless he's had a few too many and then i can't shut him up rambling about his "glory days".
Too bad he isn't more interested in the kids,
if you got some of your chatting out with someone else and then just gave him the basics do you think he would approach you more and Want to know more??
i'm interested in the responses.

We talk about everything under the sun. My husband talks about work some, but not too much. He's a very involved parent, so we do discuss our children (and other family members as well). We both follow current events and politics closely, so that is often discussed. Religion is an interesting topic. I teach language and literature, so many of our discussions spin off of whatever I'm teaching in class. My husband is a big reader as well, so we talk about whatever he's reading. I usually read the same books he reads, but I read them first, so it's kind of like having a mini book group. My husband is a great conversationalist. It's one of the things that drew me to him in the first place. :)

We both talk about work, since we both work. We are also guilty about gossiping, but it's mostly him telling me the gossip and me telling him he can't know for sure. We talk about what to do to get our son prepared for an ivy league school. (Yea, our son is only in 8th grade, but it's an "Asian thing.") We talk about our relatives. We talk about the economy and complain about the low interester rates on our savings, what to plant in the garden this year, what bargains to buy and combine with which coupons, how good the meal is that I just cooked, how cute the dog and cat are, how hungry the stray cat and bird are outside, how bad the schools are in educating the young and gifted, etc.

I'm a SAHM and my hubby only talks about work when he comes home and I ask him. We talk about almost everything! He LOVES to argue(in a good way!). We don't talk about stuff going on around the world because I don't like to watch the news and know what is going on...it's all terrible. We both LOVE sports, so we talk about that. We talk about our families...I have a huge one that is pretty entertaining and there is always something going on. We talk about fun things...where we would like to travel to someday, where our next vacation will be.

He loves to talk politics, religion...stuff like that, which I don't. So, he talks to his mom or my dad about those things. I'm good to talk to about baseball and college football...which we both love!

My husband rarely talks about work- he's a chemical/mechanical systems engineer and not only is his work incredibly complicated, it is also insanely detailed and boring. We talk a lot about his contract b/c it's up for renewal and we talk about my work which isn't really interesting to him, but the stories of the crazy teachers and principals are sometimes funny.

Mostly, we talk about our son and our families. We talk about our neighbors, the housing market, our friends... nothing Earth-shattering b/c we spend all day being "smart" and it's nice to be able to relax and just catch-up on the day!

Hubby and I have never really talked about current events, unless they have a direct impact on our lives, like rising gas prices.

We tend to talk about...
the kids - the kids school - the kids activities
work
family
friends
what's for dinner
any special weekend plans
things that need to be done around the house
vacation

His work, kids, our hobbies, future vacations, tax return, projects on the house, clothes, cleaning, mamapedia topics, cars, food, restaurants, his family, my family, upcoming birthdays (gift ideas), weekend.days off plans, tv shows, sex, bills, my job search, traffic, stuff we hear on the radio, music, holidays, when we want to have another baby, additions to our house, gas prices, healthcare, going back to school, what we want for our daughter/children..just about everything.
My SO is out of the house at 6 (at the latest....usually 5:30 or earlier on most days) and he comes home at 7:30pm at the earliest (usually 8 or 8:30pm). He works a lot, and thats a good part of our communication, and I home with our daughter so thats a good part of my communication.....but both leads to numerous other topics.
=)

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Usually if i want my fiance to talk about work, i have to bring it up. i make it a point to ask every day how work was. He's not a big talker... we also talk about the kids, the ex (his ex wife, rarely my ex bfs), school, family, what to do this weekend, sex, picking on each other (in a very playful way), the relationship with him and my daughter (she doesn't always like him), our wedding... not so much big world politics and stuff like that, because we don't have cable

I used to work @ the same company as my hubby. Now I'm disabled & stay home w/ the kids. We definetly talk about his job A LOT - it doesn't botther me. But we also talk about the things our 3 kids did that day/week, what my SAHM friends said, did...etc. I love the Yankees so we talk about that during baseball season. I learned about football so we talk about that too. & he has learned about some of my hobbies too so we can talk about that. We love to read so when we read the same books we discuss them as well as tv shows we watch. We have been together 15 years & @ one point we split up for about 4 months & were headed for divorce but we went to counceling - best thing we ever did! We were not communicating & that was the root of our problems - we had become self absorbed - only worring about what I was thinking/feeling & he was doing the same! Therapy was SO helpful! Now it's like when we first met & were dating. We compromise & talk & involve ourselves in each other & what the other enjoys. We still have our own selves but are also taking each other into consideration. & having date night once a month helps also. We have a baby otherwise we'd have date night once a week!

Wow I really had to think to anwser this. My husband also works 3/4/ to 7/8 of the time. He talks about work a lot. He is a personal trainer by day and a fork lift driver at night and I guess he judt needs someone to vent to. We also talk about the kids a lot and our friends and people we don't like. We watch movies a lot so we talk about them and music and the future. We daydream about winning the lottery and talk about what we would do. We talk about the future and our hopes and dreams and accomplishments. We talk about the past also.If you are looking for a topic, use your imigination.

We talk about our son and our our new baby-to be, friends and family gossip, and the day-to-day runnings of the house and family the most. We do talk about work, but I work in a doctor's office and he is an attorney, so there are privacy issues that keep us from talking about work as much as other couples might. We also talk about politics, sports, current events, cooking, movies, books etc.
We watch the news together most nights, which usually gives us something to talk about, and we watch documentaries together sometimes, which often sparks good discussion. I read a lot of books, hubby does not, so sometimes those conversations are nonstarters, (though he will typically listen to me rant or rave about whatever I'm reading) but my hubby reads a lot of articles (usually from The New York Times online). He sends me links to articles he thinks I will find interesting, and we discuss our opinions on those. And this time of year we spend a ridiculous amount of time talking about NCAA basketball, as we are both March Madness junkies.

We talk about his work (positive or negative), our 7 month old DD (usually how her day was and if she did anything super cute), family (mostly mine because they give us a LOT to talk about), what we're learning from our Bible studies or what we thought of the church sermon, TV shows and movies, current events or news stories, and occasionally we reminisce about things that happened (funny, sad, or ridiculous).

Sometimes we sit at the table in silence and chew our food. We used to worry when we ran out of things to say, but after 15 years we figured out it's okay.