What Can I Do If My 15 Month Old Won't Sit in a High Chair

I don't see the big deal honestly. My son was done with the highchair when he was 1. He just moved on to the chair at the table so we got a booster and he'd sometimes sit in the booster, other times kneel on a chair at the table.

I also have a 15 month old and she does not want to sit in her booster seat most of the time. She definitely prefers to sit on someones lap or stand even if it is in her booster. Good luck!

My son would not sit in a high chair no matter what. I bought a booster seat type chair from target. it straps to a regular chair. He will sit in that happily. I think he likes being like everyone else.

Who decreed that babies must eat in a high chair? Two of mine would and two wouldn't. No big deal. You said "it surely can't go on like this" regarding how you are feeding him now. He is a baby! 15 months old! You are forgetting how fast they grow up. This is a stage, nothing more. It will not last. He won't be eating that way when he is two. You will have plenty of time to teach him table manners. Don't turn this into a power struggle. Parenthood is difficult enough without creating battles where there doesn't need to be any. Lighten up, feed your little guy where he is comfortable, and don't turn this into a long-term issue in your mind, or a discipline issue, or a control issue. It isn't.

I think if you keep it up and don't feed him outside of the chair, then he will learn that he needs to be in it to get food. If he's hungry enough, he'll sit in the chair. My daughter has been in a booster seat since she was 14 months old. I felt like she was ready. Just a gut feeling. She does great, never tries to get out of it.
Good luck.

This is a tough one! 15 month olds are notorious for not wanting to stay still - there's so much to explore!

I'm assuming that you and your child are eating at the same time. I would suggest that you put his food on his high chair tray and that if he screams, let him down and say, "No screaming at the table," but the food stays put. If he wants to eat, he needs to sit. It's really not safe for him to be eating and roaming at the same time - major choking hazard.

Be very calm and matter-of-fact about it. No drama, no yelling, just, "We only eat sitting down." If he wants his food, he will learn that he has to sit in his chair to eat. The best baby advice I ever got was, "Start as you mean to go on." So you are right to try and nip this in the bud. No sense in creating habits that you will just have to break later on down the line.

As with all things related to children, patience is key! Be gentle, firm and consistent and he will eventually learn. Also, he is the perfect age to start signing! I CANNOT RECOMMEND SIGNING HIGHLY ENOUGH!!!! You will be amazed at how much is going on his little head that he can't express to you. It's very frustrating for him to have these complex thoughts and no way to let you in on them. There's a great video series called "Signing Time" and I think they made it into a TV series as well. The key is for you and all his caregivers to be consistent in using the signs yourself when you speak to him. He will pick it up very quickly and your relationship with him will advance to a whole new level. And don't be intimidated - you don't have to become fluent in sign language. Just learn a handful of key words that will help you both communicate - yes, no, help, hurt, more and signs for some of his favorite foods and drinks. Plus studies show that kids who sign talk earlier than kids who don't. Bonus - you can completely skip the terrible twos!!!

Best of luck to you and your precious little boy!

I love what S. T said! Way to go. A mom that is not willing to be controlled by her children, but be in control. These days they are to few and far between. Have a great day! And be consistent!!

Have you tried a booster chair at the table? Tell him that this is where we eat and then sit at the table with him? I would say if you want the behavior to stop you need to show him the correct behavior and not tolerate him getting up and eating. If hes hungry he will eat. If he screams let him down and if he wants to eat tell him he needs to sit at the table and put him back up and give him food. He will eventually give in...he will not starve himself.

I don't know if you tried this yet but when my son had this issue we would put a stuffed animal in the chair and pretend to feed it. He would be amused and then take his turn to sit in the chair and eat. You can try that..

It's so frustrating when they feel confined and even more frustrating for you! Have you tried eating your meals at the same time you feed him? Give him foods he can feed himself? How about a little table and chairs? That's working for us-www.weelicious.com

Hi A.:
Why so insistant that he eat from his high chair? If he were crawling out of his crib, that would tell you he was to big for his crib.He sees you,his dad and his big brother all sitting together having dinner,and obviously feels left out ,or as though you don't feel hes a big enough boy to sit at the table with you.I'd Try a booster chair,and sitting him at the table next to his brother.

Maybe he doesn't like to be so high up... or locked in ... I never fed my Daughter in her High Chair... soon he will fit in a boster at the table or maybe he'll have his own little table...

I'd like some advice also. My 22-month old daughter doesn't last long in her highchair either.

Try a booster seat at the table or revert to phonebooks, but whatever you do, don't chase him around giving him food. Even at this early age, he needs to learn there are expectation of certain behavior. Let him fuss! He will learn soon enough that chair=food. If he learns to graze now, he will be a terror to feed when he is older. Tough love now!

Have you tried a booster chair strapped to a chair where ever you all eat? And then he eats when you are all eating... No separation. My son only sat in a high chair for a couple months and then this is what we did. Maybe worth a try.

I don't know If you've tried this or not but get a booster seat and put it in one of your dining room chairs and sit at the table with him. Maybe feeling like part of the family and conversations will help.

First of all A., he is testing you/his own will - normal of course. Secondly, have you tried a booster seat in a regular chair instead??? Sometimes the feeling of being a big boy/girl & sitting like everyone else is important. If you make a big deal about it, he may even like all the more. If you definitely want to keep doing the high chair, you just have to show him consistently that he isn't going to eat unless he does as you say & don't give in to him. Do not feed him while he's walking around or sitting on your lap. Good luck & God Bless!

Sometimes my kids won't sit in their high chair too. They like to sit at the big table with everyone else. Fisher price makes a type of portable booster/high chair that you can strap to a regular chair and strap them in. Who knows it could be worth a try.

Yikes A.! You probably want to get this under control or you will never be able to take your little one to a restaurant!

I agree with what others have said that he is asserting his desire to be in control. Wrong! Mommy makes the rules and in our family we all sit at the table to eat and if his table is the high chair until his body is big enough and stable enough to sit in a booster chair then that is the rule.

I don't agree that he should be allowed to scream at the table. I believe that he should be given a few moments to pull himself into control with firm "no's" and if not then be put in his crib for a few minutes to scream it out. When he is calm bring him back and try it again. Do this as many times as you need until he complies. The best time to do this is on a Saturday when you have nothing else to do and start at breakfast. I agree with everyone who says to keep it matter of fact, calm sort of "this is the way it is". Then, as soon as you get him back in the chair......don't let 10 seconds go by without praise. Also, be sure to have his very favorite foods that he can eat himself so he can dig right in! Then praise, praise, praise with hugs and kisses!

I had the same thing going with mine... after he turned 1, and a little after he started walking., he's refused to sit in his chair...
Get him a Booster.. i got the $30 fisher price booster chair that you can strap into a regular chair, and it has a trey... it changed everything... he felt like a big boy (big boy chair), he ate better, he sat in it, it was just great...
a lot of kids grow out of the high chair phase, they're just ready for a booster... you can decorate it with stickers, to make it his own, you can have him help you buy it... trust me, it'll work... if not, you can always return it...
good luck... and may be try reading him a book to keep him interested..

I suggest a booster seat at the table. If he doesn't want to eat, then let him up. When he wants to eat, ask him to please sit in the "big boy" chair (booster seat). When he sits then give him the food.
"Big Boy Chair" gives him a sense of pride that he is no longer in the high chair. My son helped me throw out the high chair -- because he was so proud to be at the table.

Allowing him to eat while he runs around and plays will teach him poor eating habits. So I strongly suggest the table method.

I'm sure it's just a phase. I have a 15 month old, and sometimes it's just survival! But, my 15 month old actually goes to her high chair when she's hungry and that's when we feed her...when she's hanging on it. But, sometimes I let her take a toy with her and play with it while she feeds. Try taking his favorite toy and letting him play with it in the high chair. Or go and buy a special toy that he ONLY gets to play with in the high chair??? Just a suggestion. Good luck!

My daughter never really liked her high chair, but she took nicely to a booster seat. She was just around a year or so when she transitioned into one. She also did much better when "meal time" was bonding time. Even if I was not eating if I sat with her and had coffee and fruit or something she enjoyed her meals as well. Good luck!

Do you folks sit together and eat? If so, try getting one of those chairs that you strap to a regular chair and have him sit at the table with you. If all of you are sitting at the table, then he will see the example. Make a big deal out of his sitting in his big boy seat at the table with everyone and his food is on the table on a plate and everything, etc. This will only work while the whole family sits at the table, so maybe you will only have success at dinner (that is what would happen in my family), but at least you can start there. The business of grazing while playing could be a cleaning disaster for you, if he gets used to eating and playing at the same time. I had to set very strict rules about eating proximity at my house when my second started walking. Believe me, you really do want containment of the food and the sticky children, so strapping them in is a good thing. Good luck.

my son also did that so i let him eat at the coffee table or sometimes on the couch but now he's older 2.5 and now he will sometimes want to sit in the high chair...i don't put too much pressure on it i don't want him to get upset while he eats and i don't feel that he has to eat in the high chair...you'll see if you take the pressure off soon your son will want to climb back into the high chair..my son literally climbs up himself and wants to be in it now.

I am a daycare provider and usually by age 1 they are switched to a booster seat and put at the table. I think it is time mom!

You have just gotta be tough. He has got you wrapped around his finger. he knows that if he cries you will get him out of there and feed him the way he wants to eat. You have to teach him that eating while in his high chair is the norm, and what he just has to do, no exceptions. Another suggestion would be do you eat together as a family or does he have his own meal time. Maybe if he sees everyone else sitting down at a table and enjoying the meal he may be more inclined to sit and eat with everyone. Best of luck to you...

I had the same problem only it started when our now 2 yr 19 month old was 12 months. He just wouldn't sit for longer than 5 minutes. Some advice that may work:
Make sure that he's really hungry. If he is hungry, then he should be able to sit to feed himself. That was another thing with our son. He really wanted to feed himself which helped a little. After a while, we just gave up and put the high chair in the garage.

We made the horrible mistake of allowing our son to walk around and eat his food and now he will hardly ever sit to eat with us. If I had to do it over again, I would go to the store and purchase one of those seats that sits on top of a regular chair so that he feels like a big boy in a chair that mommy and daddy use.

You've already received several suggestions to try other devices for your son (ie: booster seat, etc.). Whatever device you choose, I would recommend the following actions to ensure you gain control and can set the standards you wish for your child.

- Eat with your child. Meal times are more than just sitting at a table and eating. It's also about the interaction.

- Set a timer. Require that your toddler sit at the table for 10 minutes. Let him know he cannot be excused until the timer goes off. You may choose to start at 5 minutes and work your way up. Give him the ability to be successful. The maximum amount of time a young child should be required to sit at a table is 15 minutes.

- Feed him only at the table, nowhere else. If he chooses not to eat, then he has to wait until the next meal time to eat.

- When my child screamed in her highchair she was trying to get control. This affected the entire family's mealtime. I simply would keep her in the highchair and move her away from the table for a minute (kind of like a timeout) and then bring her back.

The bottom line is you need to let your son know who's in control. If he doesn't eat, he'll learn real fast what the standards are to be nourished. I had issues with my daughter and we gained control in about 2 days. The steps above were given to me by an occupational therapist speacializing in children's feeding issues.

If you need additional support as you're going through this, please feel free to email me. I know what you're experiencing.

Instead of a high chair have you thought about one of the boosters that attaches to a chair. They have straps so the kid doesn't fall out. Maybe he wants to eat just like evryone esle. They also have chairs that attach to the table my sone loved this bc he was apart of the table and with us like a big boy.

Do you have a stroller with a tray? A booster is great if he will do it and you are all sitting together, but if it's a snack or mealtime not with all of you, have you tried a stroller? I wouldn't stress too much, like everyone else says, it's probably a phase. When he is old enough to understand, you can start the discipline, but for now, maybe your lap is the best place if he eats well and is happy there. One of my kids loved the highchair and the other didn't. She liked my lap or her stroller. She's only two now and sits in a "big chair" (or occasionally likes a lap).
Good luck!

How about buying one of those booster seat chairs? These strap onto a regular chair. They have the option of having a tray attached to it or you can scoot it next to the table so he can eat like a big boy.

Get a booster seat and let him sit with you at the big table, while you sit and eat with him. If he still screams let him down, he will eventually get hungrey and will be willing to sit. It will take a while to undo feeding while walking around. If he won't touch his food say fine and let him down but don't give him any food unless he is sitting there-just keep saying when you are ready to eat your food will be up at the table. Be strong, he knows he can win the battle by screaming-don't give in he does not eat unless he is at the table. I am sure he wont go hungrey he will sit when he is hungrey enough. You can also use this strategy in the high chair-let him out when he screams but no food unless he is sitting there.
Also when you first get the booster chair make a big deal about him being able to sit at the big table now, and sit and eat with him the first few times, then you can slowly remove yourself.

I used to put my son in the excersaucer, and he liked that, until he got over the "anti-highchair" phase....

Lose the chair. I think my high chairs for my twins were a complete waste of money. MOve him to a booster seat at the table and sit and eat with him. The goal is to make him a part of the family at meals. You can get the boosters with a seat belt but I don't think we used them all that much. And, you can take them with you when you go out to eat. We had ones by Safety First that strapped onto chairs. Then when we were going out they folded up and we carried them along.

You really do not want to get in the habit of feeding him like you are. Try the booster!

C.

Haven't had this problem, but I think that maybe buy a booster seat that you can seat him with you at your dining table. Most of the seats are sold with a tray, but you can remove the tray and push his seat in closer so that he can use the table instead. Let him know that big boys eat at the big table like mommy.

If you live near or have access to an IKEA, they have a chair there for little kids (though your son may be a little too young for it at the moment) that looks like a regular chair, but it is higher up so that he can sit at the table like a big boy.

my daughter moved to a booster seat (with seat belt) at the table at the same age--felt like a big girl and was sooo happy as soon as we gave her that option. i did keep the highchair (unused for months!) and she was happy to get back in it a couple of months later (but that only lasted a while). likely your son is exerting his independence--i'd try to give him a little & see if he can handle it! :) it may get it out of his system or it may work out great, either way it is worth a try. we love our booster seat--i think it is a "first years" product (?) not sure. we took it everywhere for a long time with my daughter & have started doing the same for my son (now that she is 3 & he is 1). best of luck!

btw, have had friend who did the drive-by feedings because her daughter refused to sit for a meal and it was not fun. it got worse over time and became a very difficult habit to break.

Hi Austra,

This can be a hard time for mom and child. I get the feeling you are concerned about his safety, but he wants a little control. He is obviously not happy restrained in his highchair. If you really think about it, kids have such little control over their lives, that sometimes we need to chose our battles and allow room for choice. Giving your child choices, but choices within your own boundaries, can make life easier for everyone.

There really are some safe booster seat alternatives. Some are higher type chairs that sit right up to your table and others are boosters that just sit on top of your own chairs. Some regular high chairs can even have the tray removed and just pushed up to the table too. Perhaps you can come up with some boudaries and choices that you are comfortable with and your child can choose which one he would like. I would say something like this, "I can see that sitting in your highchair is upsetting you. I have thought of some fun ideas for you. Do you want to chose one?" Then he is safe and happy at the same time. And so are you! :O)

I really try to remember this thought process whenever my child objects to something. I think to myself... is this at all negotaible? Sometimes it is not, but often it is....within the boudaries that I choose. It really makes life easier and, as a by product, it teaches my child to compromise and find alternate solutions. He learns to find win-win situations with others.

Best wishes to you!

Love,
G.

Be the parent. If he only ate in the chair he would learn to do it, you're giving him the choice of eating elsewhere.

Hello A. B, Try putting him in a walker or swing and feed him that way. M.