My SD is 9 and taking a dance class and I'd like to take her to class and then leave to pick up something at the store. My husband doesn't think it's safe to leave her alone at dance. I think she will be fine, and the teacher will have my cell phone number plus she has a cell phone and my cell phone number. I will also only be down the street.
I teach sports and many of the parents leave their kids at class starting at age 8 if they aren't going far. They always leave a phone number.
What age did you allow your kids to be at sports alone?
We attend a music class and parents are requested to leave starting with the 3.5-5 year old group.
I think that's fine, they are supervised by the teacher...
Good luck.
well, I've left my 3YO at dance before, because we aren't allowed in the room so she doesn't know. And at gymnastics since there's only a window. However, I might not have if there weren't close friends, other moms, there in case she came out to potty or whatever. I suspect around kindergarten I will start feeling comfortable leaving. But i also trust who she is with and the place she is at. If she was taking lessons at a different facility in a different part of town i might feel differently.
As a dance teacher, I wish all the parents would leave starting at age 2! lol! No, at least to the car and drive away so that way they know M. is not there and they have to get used to me.
Anyway- you are fine. How long is she there? 1 - 3 hrs at a time at her age? As you said, you are a phone call away, and, a good studio will make sure that the teachers have the phone numbers on the roster in the room with them in case something happens. Of course, if it is a real emergency, 911 would be called before you. But, really, there should be plenty of folks there if something were to go wrong, that, your husband has no reason to worry.
When I owned a studio, I used to go the route of, "this is a great hour or two for you to go to the gym, or, get some groceries" for my students' parents. Some, surprisingly, had never thought of it. I just never could understand why anyone would want to sit and do nothing for an hour or two. But, I am a busy-body, and, can NEVER sit still. It would just be wasted time if I had to sit and wait for my own kids to get out of class! :)
I want to edit because of some responses I read- Being a teacher, I have my own point of view of things. When the smaller kids "know" that M. is outside waiting, they tend to make excuses to leave the room. (i.e. "I need to potty", "I need M. to tie my shoe", "I need M. to help me change shoes", "I need to SEE my M."!) As a teacher, I feel that kids need independence from M.! When they know M. is gone, they learn to lean on other adults for guidance, which, is what you are paying us to do, in addition to teaching them their lesson. They develop much faster as their own little person when M. is not always there to help them. They do have to grow up! And, with dance, you get to see the "finished product" at all the shows and such, and, it is a surprise then!
I started leaving kiddo at 6. I homeschool, so it was a deliberate thing: I want him to have time with trusted adults/mentors and other kids so that he could interact with them without me looking over his shoulder... and so that he could start having time again to tell me about. Both of which I believe to be developmentally (cognitively, emotionally, socially) important.
The coaches, teachers, or front desk staff all have my cellphone... as does he.
I also started letting him make runs on his own last winter (snowboarding), when he was 7. He has a GPS cell phone, knows to follow our rules (of course, he tests them... I banned him from the freestyle park for riding over there without sending me a txt or giving me a call... whenever he changes lifts or goes to the lodge he has to let me know), and I *basically* trust him to follow them. He's also really easy to track up there (not a lot of kids on the slopes M-F... so "everyone" knew him). So between the GPS locater, calling/texting rules, and the staff and snow addicts, he FEELS like he has a lot more freedom than he actually does.
I really enjoy staying for most of his classes... so I do sometimes. But I make myself drop off and pick up at least 1/2 of his classes most of the time. Most of the time I'm a block or two away catching up on lesson planning... but I'm never more than 10 minutes away. So in event of emergency... I'd be there before the ambulance. My witnessing it happen wouldn't help matters. Accidents happen. Knock on wood... the most serious thing that has happened in the past 2 years is he and another student having to be separated one time.
Why would you DH not think it's safe?
My daughter is 7.... she takes Karate.
I stay there for her class.
SOMETIMES, I will tell her, that I have to go run an errand... but will be back soon. I also tell the Teachers. They know how to contact me, as do the other Parents there.
I am never, far away.... I can get back there within 10 minutes if need be, by car or running at full speed.
My concern is not 'age' of the child... but that anything can happen... an injury in my daughter's case since it is Karate class etc.
And the bathrooms are not in a dark creepy corner of the site... and I always tell another Mom friend there... (that I trust), and my Daughter, that they can go to each other etc.
Again, I sometimes leave during my daughter's class time... but never for more than 1/2 hour.
That is just me.
all the best,
Susan
This is easy.....have your husband bring her to dance class and sit and watch her. See. Easy. Problem solved.
As long as you are back when the class ends, it should be fine.
I think that as long as the parent is back before the end of class, there is no problem.
If the class or sport does not require the parents to remain on the premises (you must stay for swim lessons for example) then I'm happy to leave my children for class/practice if it's practical. (I do attend the games, of course), I distinctly remember leaving my daughter when she was four at her art class. Depending upon how far away the class/practice is, it sometimes doesn't make sense to leave because I would get home, only to have to leave 10 minutes later for the return trip. I have no safety concerns whatsoever with sports or any other classes; I only stay for logistical purposes or if it can do double duty (soccer practice at a park with a playground where my younger kids can play, for example).
Although I usually like to stay and watch my kids classes, I am comfortable leaving them once and a while and returning before the end of class. My kids are 6 and 4.
Your daughter is not alone. She is with the teacher and other classmates in a safe environment.
When my little one was in Karate (age 4), I stayed, but many of the parents did not, and the class was for 4-6 year olds. The kids were under the eye of the teacher and her assistant, so I never thought anything of it, I stayed because he still needed help if he had to pee.
I personally do not leave my children alone at sports. To me there is too high a risk of personal injury and I want to be there just in case.
I also feel it shows my kids that I care about them and what they are doing. I feel that they will stay more engaged and interested in the sport if they know I am interested too. They love to be praised for a job well done and it's a little hard to do when you weren't there to see the job they did.
Just my opinion!
If you are back before the class ends, and your daughter is comfortable with it, then I would do it. I leave my son (now 12) at karate class all the time, while I go to the grocery store. When he was younger (9 ish) I was back from the shortest of errands before class was over... now that he is older, I don't worry if I am a few minutes later getting there. He knows I am on the way soon, and he knows not to leave the building, and all the staff knows me and him, he knows my cell #, they know my cell #, etc etc. Plus, he is a black belt now, and they will ask him to help in other classes sometimes. My daughter, 9, just started classes, and I will leave her sometimes also. But I am back before class is over, unless her brother is also there. If so, then she will sit and watch his class (as his advanced class follows her beginner class). She also knows my cell #, knows the instructors, and is comfortable with it. If she was not, then I wouldn't do it.
I started leaving at 6, when she felt comfortable. I stay most of the time, because I enjoy watching, I am only one that stays. At soccer practices when there multi ages practicing. Kinder there are lots of parents, 1st a few, 2nd grade-just me, and 3rd-none.
has your kid been to daycare?
camp?
girl scouts?
all those your not there
I don't have older kids, but I know my parents regularly left me at my karate class alone when I was 9. I also rode my bike to and from soccer practice when I was 7 and on (soccer field was just six blocks away).
Ask your SD and see if she's comfortable with it. If so, then take advantage of the opportunity to shop while she's dancing.
Good luck!
At 9 years i would be ok, IF
a) she is ok with you leaving
b) you let her know where are you going and she knows your phone number
c)she is not new
d) you trust the staff and they too have your phone number
e) You are not going far and not take highways (even if you are on time, if an accident happens you could be stuck in traffic who knows for how long)
f) and you are back before class is done.
I leave my 7 year old at an hour long dance class often. I think your will be just fine!
I always stay just because I like to watch my daughters ice skating class. And, I think she likes me watching... If I bring a book to read I think she gets offended!! LOL - but with girlscouts, she is practically begging me to leave! (ha-ha) but I help out with the troop during meetings alot so I have only left her alone there once.I say she is "old enough" as long as you are back before it's over. Also a big thing is if she wants you to stay. But if she knows you really don't want to stay ... she might say she doesn't care even if she really does (hope that makes sense)
I dropped my daughter off at dance class when she was 8, a lot of other moms did too. The teacher/studio had my cell number in case of an emergency.
