I want to go on a retreat in June for the weekend, but I am nervous about leaving my daughter for that long. She has a caregiver she loves who will stay with her, and her dad will be with her too, so I know she will be safe and happy. Is it okay to leave her for that long at her age? She will be 18 months old at that time.
Thanks everybody, I booked the retreat and I am going! I will miss my daughter more than she will miss me, I'm sure. I appreciate all the support.
Not only is it ok, it will be good for you, baby and daddy too! I would definitely go and not worry at all.
Hi J.,
OMG, Go and have a blast. Take advantage of the available time. You might not have another chance like this in a while. Heck, if I get the opportunity to go to the bathroom alone it's like a weekend retreat! Go for it girl and come home refreshed for not only your kids but for the hubby too.
Enjoy, I'm jealous,
L.
I agree with the other moms, go and have fun! My husband and I finally went on our honeymoon (2 years late) when my daughter was 15 months and we left her with my parents for a week. She had a BLAST getting doted on by her grandparents, and my husband and I had a wonderful time re-connecting. We all need to get away sometimes and not be mommies for a few days! It's good for us, and good for our kids too.
Yes, you should go.
If she never leaves your side, she'll struggle with that later. She needs to learn that you leave and come back. It will be okay when you leave.
Go and have fun!
Stephanie
When my daughter was only a little older i think 20 mos my husband took her to CO for 10 days! I was freaked out but it was a fantastic experience for them and great for bonding. If you are still nursing she probably eats enough solids where even that wont be an issue if you pump a few times! Enjoy!
hi, I left on a retreat with my church when my daughter was about the same age or younger. I knew she would be well taken care of with her daddy. He had 3 of them to watch. They all did just fine, they even went out for a day to visit grandma and grandpa. A few weeks after I saw pictures of their weekend when I was gone and it looks like they all had fun. So got out and have fun and enjoy yourself!
RUN do not walk to that retreat and enjoy yourself. This will give you much needed recharge time. And time to be YOU instead of someone's wife or mother.
And it will give her some serious bonding time with daddy.
Plus it's only for a weekend. She'll barely realize you're gone most of the time.
Hi J.,
I agree with the advice given here... go have a great time. You will come home so refreshed and she will be fine for the two days.
Blessings,
D.
Relax and don't make a big deal out of it. When parents make a big deal out of anything at all, that is what ends up sticking in your mind as a trauma and it follows you the rest of your life. Don't let the little things get big. Nagging worries are thoughts that are usually not true, or at least you have the power to ignore them. You will just KNOW when something is not right and you won't have to ask anybody about it, you will just do what you need to! Trust yourself and your husband. This will be great for all of you.
Love, L.
Hi J., You should go as long as she is safe. It will be a great bonding time for her and her daddy too. Go and enjoy yourself.
My husband and I left our son overnight for the first time when he was 20 months old. He stayed with my mom, who we adores, and he did great. He did have a bit of a hard time going to bed but she just let him watch a movie and he eventually fell asleep. He was happy as could be when we got home and very excited to see us. Honestly, it will probably be harder on you than it will on her. A general rule of thumb I've heard is that you can leave your child one day for every year of age. So at 18 months, she' probably ok for 2 days. I would just make sure that the caregiver/dad would be honest and tell you if she's not handling it well. If I were you I would rather come home than know my daughter was upset! Also, I think you will be surprised by how much she grows up between now and then. When my son hit 18 months, he suddenly seemed like a "big boy" and much more able to cope without me around. If you decide to go, have a great time!
Yes, it's absolutely okay!
Dear J.,
My son was only 15 months old when I had to go in the hospital for a week. It broke my heart, but he actually did just fine and was so happy when I got home.
I think a couple of nights away for something that will re-energize your batteries would be wonderful for you and your little one will weather it just fine.
Mommies need time too and I think we forget that sometimes.
You'll be away for a happy reason and I think your daughter and her daddy will do just great.
Relax and enjoy!
hi there
actually, it's EASIER to do it now than when they are about age 4 or 5... I traveled when my son was that age and then when he reached about 4 1/2 he began to ask why can't he come and would get very upset if I left him... so do it NOW while you can :):) with no real questions asked, oh sure your child will wonder where you are from time to time, but if one parent is still home , let alone a loving caregiver, your baby will be just fine... :) you will probably end up more homesick to be with her than vice versa..
enjoy your retreat..
Hi J.,
From a mother with 4 young kids.....YES! Take the chance while you can! Have a wonderful weekend just for yourself and when you get back, all will be well. at 18 months old, she'll forget you're gone and have a good time. And then when you get back, she'll remember, Oh yeah, I have a mommy, and be so excited to see you! So my goodness, girl, go and have fun!
oh the age old question. Your daughter will be fine, however since it sounds like it might be your first time away from her. My suggestion is to try a mommy's night away but close to home befor that. One where you stay in a hotel in town, or 20-30 minutes away overnight. So that if you have a freak out, you can get home fast, but also so that you can see that she will be okay overnight without you. and to condition yourself to being away from her (which is really the issue). I didn't leave my first son until he was 14 mths old and it was only for an overnighter and I left AFTER he went to bed :) ha ha. My second son, I didn't leave until he was 13 mths old and it was for 2 nights and I couldnt' get home fast enough. But they survived and so did I. You need mommy time too......it's hard, but they will love a more relaxed mommy all the better.
And trust me, it's almost worth it to see the love and excitment upon your return. :)
good luck
K.
Go on your retreat momma, I'm sure your daughter will be just fine. I have been away from my daughter for as long as three nights before and she is only 16 months. I think it was harder on me than her, she was having fun with Grandma.
Your daughter will be fine. Give yourself the gift of taking a break from mothering for a weekend. You'll come back refreshed and a better mother for it. It's good for Dad to have bonding time with the daughter as well. She won't be scarred, I promise you. Have Dad plan something special to do with her...go for ice cream.
She's 18 mo and you haven't left her for a weekend? Wow. She will be fine without you for a couple of days. And if she isn't then there are bigger issues going on.
It absolutely is safe to leave for a few days, especially at that age because it sounds like you lined up great care. Honestly, you are struggling more with your own feelings. That means you love her so much. But, know she will be fine. Although you will miss her terribly, you will enjoy your break, and daddy gets to bond with his little girl. You can speak to her every day, and you will find the time will fly. Give yourself this opportunity to rejuvenate and enjoy your retreat. Your little one will be happy with daddy and caregiver, and will welcome you with the biggest smile and love imagineable.
Unless it is going to cause you worry and stress...GO! As a mom, you will put your child before yourself more times than you can imagine. It sounds like you have her care taken care of, so trust your husband and caregiver to keep her happy. It will be a great chance for hubby to bond with her too! You will find that she will probably miss you less at this age than she will as she gets older. When I travel, my 14 yo old misses me more than my 10 yo son or 4 yo daughter. You can look forward to how happy she is to see you too...it's SO fun!! Go on your weekend retreat and enjoy!! Don't forget to keep treating yourself from time to time...don't lose yourself in motherhood as so many of us do. Take care.
