Walking Toddler (18 Months Old)

Let him scream and cry. When he's done hold his hand. He will eventually tire of it, but to me hand holding, especially at 18 months is non negotiable. You can quietly tell him you'll cross the street when he's done but you won't be picking him up. Worst case scenerio you go back the other way and go home. It may sound harsh, but reasoning with an 18 month old is pretty close to impossible, so speak in actions.

Tori said it all..

The reason he wants to walk on his own is because he likes being independent, but his safety is more important.. Instead give him a choice. "We are about to cross the street. Do you want to hold my hand or do you want me to carry you? "

"Do you want me to hold your wrist or your hand?" "Do you want to ride in the stroller or hold my hand?"

Only give him 2 choices that you are willing to accept his choice..

My son did the same thing from the time he could walk. Just keep doing what you are doing. Either he holds your hand or you carry him. Those are the choices, no negotiating. My son is almost 3 now and all I have to do is remind him that we are in a parking lot or near the street and he grabs my hand and won't let go. Sometimes he even reminds me while I'm still closing the car door. Eventually your son will get it, you just have to stay consistent.

Give him a choice: "you can hold my hand or I can carry you." He's young to understand the cause-effect, but he has a real choice (but if he doesn't choose, you get to choose for him).
You'll probably have to deal with the screaming for a while. He's expressing his displeasure. But he can't have his way, it's not safe. Just remember, every parent has been in public with a screaming child at least once, so when we see a parent patiently dealing with that, we know everything's ok.

Have you though of getting him a backpack-leash? It looks like a cute backpack, but has a harness that he can't undo on his own, and has a leash connected to keep him close to you. Gives him some freedom, but still lets you keep him near and safe. Some parents love these (I did, wouldnt have made it without!) and others think they're awful (I got lots of snide comments too), so I would say it's a personal choice and ignore other's comments. But I thought it helped.

Hmmmm.. uhhhh every parent who ever had a toddler? lol

Yes, they all do that at some point. Just pick him up. He doesn't know that you'd really rather let him walk. He will just know that bucking the rules doesn't get him what he wants. It gets him carried.. which he really doesn't want. Tell him the rules, when he balks, pick him up. If he can't hold hands, he can't walk. The end. Some kids are more stubborn about this than others. My son NEVER wanted to hold hands! And he was an EARLY walker and hated to be carried... so he fought that too. My daughter learned very quickly to hold hands... and she would still voluntarily offer me her hand to cross parking lots until she was around 8 yrs old.

He'll figure it out. You just have to be firm, not give in, and be prepared to haul a hefty load. lol

my son did that too. he started around 17-18 months not wanting to hold hands anymore. i just kept telling him "you have to hold mommy's hand, or a big car might not see you" he's really into cars, so that kind of got his attention. it went away about a month later. we take a walk around the neighborhood everyday for practice and exercise. now he knows that he stays on the sidewalk and holds mommy's hand when crossing the street, or a "car might not see him". also, i try not to mention that he's "too little". kids can be sensitive to feeling not good enough, or big enough. i just say that it's not safe and that mommy will keep him safe. after awhile, he'll get the hang of it.

I have the exact same problem with my 18 month old daughter. And i can't stand when people stare when she starts screaming, like they've never seen it before. I thought about getting the backpack with the leash too but i don't think i can bring myself because I know it looks like a leash and I don't do well with rude comments or stares! But I do think it's a good idea. If we are walking near streets it is automatic as soon as her feet are on the floor she has to hold hands, and I don't even let her have a taste of walking by herself because that just makes it worse. Inside a store if she tries to go off by herself I will tell her 'bye bye' and that usually gets her attention because they still want to know you're nearby at this age. Of course if she doesn't comply with any of these I give her the choice also 'we hold hands or you have to go back in the stroller/cart' or her dad usually ends up carrying her also;)

This is a time for him to learn that Mama and Daddy are the bosses. He's too young to understand safety. So he MUST hold your hand when crossing the street. It's walk and hold or don't walk - just those two choices. If he screams, you'll need to deal with it as you would if he were throwing a tantrum any other time. "Too bad - next time maybe you can walk, if you'll hold my hand."

You might work on the most important aspects first - crossing streets and in parking lots. I used to tell my children when they were that young that they needed to hold my hand so I wouldn't get lost. But I don't know if that will work on your boy!

Be friendly while you're being firm. This situation is just not negotiable.

My daughter did that at the beginning. I began to wrap my fingers around her arm so that she could not yank her arm free, but using my thumb and middle finger so that it wasn't too tight. My daughter likes walks, so we "practiced" walking in our residential area. It wasn't long before she actually offers her hand when we go out the door. Now, my problem is getting her to stay by me if I let go...hehehe. It will come, just be patient.

I had the same issue with my daughter from the moment she started walking. After a terrifying experience (for me) where she got away from me and lost in a large store, I broke down and bought a harness backpack and leash. Yes, I did get a lot of people feeling the need to express their opinions that I was somehow harming my daughter. I, however, being an older mom had no issues with giving them my opinion of them sticking their nose in my business. My daughter thought it was so neat to wear the backpack and I had the reassurance and comfort of knowing that if I blinked, she would still be there, safe and sound.

I have a backpack monkey that goes on my sons back and I hold onto its "tail" I was worried about people looking at me funny but I was desperate. You know people actually tell me that its a good idea and some older moms say they wish they had those when their kids were young. I have never gotten dirty looks and Im seeing more and more kids with them on. My son likes it and snuggles with it in the car and stores stuff in the pocket like a backpack.