Twin 3 Year Olds in Grocery Store Its a Nightmare

My advice - hire a babysitter!!! I feel your pain, and I wish the "firmness" and distractions worked. I have twin boys that turned 3 in August, and I have stopped taking them anywhere. It's just too painful!! Our most recent trip to the airport to pick up Daddy ended up with the security guard standing next to me because I wasn't "holding my children".
I feel like a horrible mother most days, because my boys are so wild. They don't listen at all to myself or my husband, but are great with anyone else, and actually have manners - GRRR!
Someone recently suggested that we start spending more 1 on 1 time with them (which is next to impossible). I watch my friends with single children and I'm beginning to think the 1 on 1 might help... if you figure it out, please let me know!

Everyone says it will get better - I fear I'll be waiting a LONG time! L.:)

Sorry the late response. You wont have a babysitter everytime you go to the grocery store so here's some advice. I saw this on that tv show Nanny 911 and it really helped me. Involve the kiddos. I let my 4 year old (with my guidence and suggestions) pick out which items I want and have her place it into the cart. Maybe since you have two, they can take turns. It's amazing how well it's worked. It turned shopping from a nightmare to a plesant experience.

J.,
Have you ever heard of a drop-in center. Check out our website at www.mommysfreedom.com. You can drop off your children for as many or few hours as you need. Prices are at $5.75 per hour. You can drop them off, get your shopping done without hassle then pick them up and you all still had an enjoyable day.

Hi J.,

I know you asked this question a long time ago, but I just read it and wanted to say...it WILL get better! My twin boys are nearly five, and for the last couple of years I've been shopping at night when my husband is home, or when the kids were at my Mom's, or on my lunch hour at work. WHAT A PAIN!

For a while they did great with snacks while I shopped, sitting in the "toddler" carts, but that wore off about the time they turned three. It was just too hard even to go in to the store for milk, if they were along. The grocery store is like a minefield of stuff to grab and climb, and I just could not get them to behave in that environment.

HOWEVER, this week we had a breakthough and I took them to the store for a few things. What I did was put them to work--we talked about "the list" in advance and I got them each a basket to carry when we got into the store. I carried the heavier stuff in my basket and they toted the rest. With jobs to do and a clear idea of what we were getting, they were happy to help. I should have tried this sooner, but the memory of a couple of bad shopping trips had me scared.

All that to say, one day you'll find that they're good helpers and not going crazy in the store--and that will be a wonderful day! Good luck...there are so many fun things about twins, and unfortunately grocery shopping just isn't one of them. (I still prefer shopping by myself, but it's definitely a luxury!)

Do you know any teenagers who could use a little extra cash once a week? :-)

Also, what time of day are you shopping? Mine typically do best on grocery trips fairly early in the morning....like before 10am.

Also, fewer trips to the store will save you some grief. For example, with the way our budget is set up I get my grocery money out in cash once a month. I make one huge trip (which might be worth getting someone to babysit for -- I typically leave mine home with their dad...or, if their dad has visitation, maybe shop while they're at his place?). I try to get a month's worth of all the non-perishibles and paper goods, check to see if we'll run out of anything in the next 30 days, such as ketchup, cooking oil, etc. and go ahead and get that too. I get 4 or 5 bottles of apple juice, 5 boxes of cereal, 3 jars of peanut butter, 5 loaves of bread (you can freeze them and pull a loaf out as you need it), etc.
You should also be able to get 2 weeks worth of some perishibles, dairy, fruit, etc.
This way, when I do have to make trips to the store with the it's just for a few items and we can get in and out quickly.
And, I gave up trying to confine mine in the cart for long. Since our trips are quick, I enlist their help. I've come home with weird brands, smashed bread, etc., but it's a small price to pay for a peaceful trip to the store. If you really have a "runner" on your hands, it might not work, but what I do is have them ride in the cart til I get to the first isle. I tell each kid an item on that isle to retrieve, then send them out. I tell them they need to get their item and come straight back to the cart. While they're running down the isle, I grab whatever else I need, then they come back, hop back into the cart, and we round the corner to the next isle, repeat the process... They'll get tired of it eventually, but if I can keep things moving quickly, we can make it from one end of Walmart to the other fairly peacefully (notice "fairly" -- peace is a relative term when preschoolers are concerned).

Another idea would be something that I read in the Parenting with Love & Logic book. You basically stage a training session. It will take some planning, but the results can be worth it. If you have a relative or good friend who's willing to help you out, have them meet you at the store, but don't let your kids know she's there. She'll wait outside while you go in as if it's a normal shopping trip. Before you get them out of the car, tell them the ground rules (staying in the cart, etc.) and how you expect them to behave, then say, "If getting groceries becomes too much trouble and not enough fun for me, something's going to happen..." Don't tell them what will happen!

Go about your shopping and when they begin misbehaving, stop the cart and say, "uh oh, looks like something's going to have to happen. Excuse me while I make this phone call." Give your friend a call and her job is to swoop in with another grocery cart, load the boys up and take them somewhere else. She could take them to your house, her house, or grab your keys and take them to your car, buckle them in and wait with them for you to get done. If she takes them somewhere, you'll have to work out how to move car seats, etc.

Anyway, according to the stories in the book, this little trick worked.

hope some of this helps!

I know it is not always possible, but could you go to the grocery store after work, before you go home? Have you tried telling the boys what your expectations are of them in the store, before you go in, and what the consequences will be if they do not meet these expectations? I tried this with my almost 3 y/o, at the suggestion of my sister-in-law and have been pleasantly surprised at the results. I too am single and can't imagine doing this with twins!! Good luck and God bless.
M.

J.,

I truly understand what you are going through. I have 3 year old twin girls. They didthis in the beginning. They started when they were two, but I put the brakes on this behavior fast. I would let them know what the store rules were and what the consequences were for them not obeying them. If they behaved I rewarded them with something they really wanted, such as a special snack or movie rental. I never cave in if they throw a tantrum. I promptly will remove them from the store and we go home with no groceries. That means we eat something not so good, because we weren't able to pick up their favorite foods because of the bad behavior. After days of eating oatmeal (plain) for breakfast and dry cheese sandwiches for lunch and beans and rice for dinner, they quickly learned what it meant if we couldn't shop for groceries. I make shopping fun as well. We play "I spy" or I will give them a pretend grocery list with pictures of things we need or expired coupons to look for those products and then they get a sticker for finding the product. I have a total of 4 kids and have used this with them all and not only do they behave, but they are reading and doing math by the time they enter kinder. I allow them to help pick out items and hold the special item they want to buy until we get to the register. I know how hard it can be, but with prayer and consistent loving reward and discipline there is light at the end of the tunnel. Finally, make sure you are shopping when they are well rested and not hungry. No matter what the reward or punishment, nothing or no one can control a cranky, sleepy, hungry pre-schooler. Good Luck

I only have one that is young but I feel you your pain. She hates to shop and it makes it almost impossible to take her anywhere!! She wants down and she takes off running. I have tried some of the previous suggestions- the main one being a sitter. It cost me an extra $20 on grocery day but it is so worth it! I get my shopping done quick and without the distractions. I also purchased the backpack harness and yesterday was our first time using it. She did pretty good with it for the most part. (i did get a few bad looks from people- like Im being mean to my child) but whatever it takes to keep them safe! You said you work at night- could you get an extra hour after work to shop- bonus- the store wont be busy and maybe it wont cost you too much extra in sitter fees. Good luck to you and know you are not alone!

There is a great book called "Train up a Child" by Mike and Debi Pearl that has been very helpful for my husband and I to learn how to set appropriate boundaries and to TEACH (train) our children how to behave and what is appropriate before we go into these types of situations. It is hard work!! But WELL worth it. Recently we were in Goodwill and my hands were FULL - DH had gone to find a plug for the bread machine we were thinking about purchasing so he could test it out.

My nearly-3 and almost-18-month old were looking like mischief so I called to them "Evan! Brianna! Come put your hands on mommy's knees" (something we've trained them to do to get them to stand in a certain place and to not run around) Sure enough - he put the ball he'd been chasing back on the shelf and she came toddling right over and they both placed their hands on my knees and stood quietly in line with me until I got ot the counter and could set my stuff down.

I know that wouldn't have been possible withou the diligent work and time we had invested in them earlier - we coldn't wait until we were in the store to begin training them.

Anyway - the book was SO helpful, the volume two even more so. The website has from free articles, downloadable messages, etc. www.nogreaterjoy.org.

I'm just grateful I found the information when I did. My children are so happy and joyful and so much fun to be with now! Mostly becuase _I_ am happy and joyful instead of stressing out about them and wondering what they will get into next.
Take it from someone who's been there and done that - it's NOT too late. But it will take some work. AND CONSISTANCY!
Blessings, A. <><

I don't know where you live, but the Kroger I shop at in Allen has a play center you can drop your kids off in for free while you're shopping. I don't know if all Kroger's have this but it would be worth checking around and driving a little further if you need to. They have to be at least 3 years old. I don't grocery shop with my kids any where else because of it.

Before they were 3, I shopped after 8 p.m. after they went to bed and my husband was home. I was tired but it was worth it. It's only one night a week.

What about those car carts? Maybe they would sit better if they can play driving the car? I really feel for you. Single with children is the pits. G. W

The Kroger store in Allen, Texas at Alma and McDermott (northwest corner) has a terrific playroom where kids can do art, watch a movie and play games while mom shops for groceries. The security looks pretty good too. The Kroger store on Bethany at Allen Heights (Allen, Texas) also has one.

A friend of mine does her shopping at the Super Target and her 2 kids get the 99 cent popcorn/beverage special. They are always good in the cart and the popcorn generally lasts the whole shopping trip.

J.,
I have 2-year old twins and a 4 year old. It gets pretty hairy when we go to the store. I actually put the girls in their stroller (it's more comfortable) and pull a cart behind me(or my son pushes it.) They don't do well in the regular carts and they are even worse in the big carts with two seats. I also made a master shopping list. I typed the aisle number and what they have on the sign above each aisle. Then I have lines for me to fill in what I need. That helps the shopping trip go much smoother because I know exactly where I need to go. I also have a place for the pharmacy, miscellaneous, etc. I can send you a copy for an example if you'd like. It's not perfect but it sure has cut down on the time I'm in the store.

I am so glad you wrote this request. I've gotten some great ideas from the other moms.
Good luck!

The Plano Walmart at Coit and Spring Creek has 4 great carts for shopping that have a video playing - barney, thomas, wiggles or bob the builder. You put $1 in the machine to activate the cart. You have to load the groceries into a normal cart before you leave the store - but that's easy - I just ask the checker to get me a cart before she bags the groceries. Best $1 spent. My 2 toddlers share a cart and never want to get out!

I'm sure other stores must have these - but I've only seen them at the Walmart.

I feel for you--I just noticed that you work nights and you're home all day with your little ones--do you ever get to sleep? In your situation, you have to have a support team--very important for a single parent. As others have suggested, find a teen in your area for babysitting, or if you are really strapped for money, do some trading of services with a friend. You watch her kids while she shops, then she'll do the same for you. You might be able to obtain a list of YMCA certified sitters through your local YMCA branch. Take a deep breath--this race is a cross-country marathon, not a sprint! Sounds like you love those little guys a lot--it's hard to use "tough love" but you have to start giving meaningful consequences to bad behavior. They are definitely old enough to understand the the "if this, then that" concept. Use that to your advantage, and DON'T BACK DOWN! Best of luck to you--

I was in trouble with my three years old that is very active, now I let in choose the car , Kroger have a red with two seats, green and blue and some with one seat, I locked him inside, and he's happy with a toy or cookie inside.

It helps me if I take their shopping carts with them (I have a 3 year old and a 2 year old) and give them a picture list of what they're looking for - go at slow store times though so they don't run anyone over.

Teri

I feel your pain! My twin girls are 15 mos. old and just now figuring out how to climb our of the cart. Wish I had some good advice for you, but looks like I may be a little behind on you with this twin adventure! Just wanted to say hello and let you know that I understand how crazy it must be!

I would also suggest 2 things. First of all, the new tv carts at Walmart are pretty helpful. But, it sounds more like it is time to be firm and set some pretty harsh rules. I would gete a backpack harness for each of them for a while. If they prove that they can behave and stay right with you, then they dont have to wear it, if not, they do. Make sure that you are not taking them tired or hungry, and I agree with trying to get them involved some. Also, make sure that you are practicing good behavior in other places too. They should be able to leave the park when you say, brush their teeth when you call them etc. They should earn the freedom to walk at the store, it is not a right. Good luck!! I am sure things can be crazy! ~A.~

make your trips as quick as possible...have your list made well-categorize so you don't miss anything or need to back track. give them a special snack to occupy them long enough-even if it's bad for them (cookies, candy)-it's all about keeping everyone happy-even you!

I am not sure where you live, however, the Kroger on Lamar and I-30 in North Arlington has child care while you shop. You can watch you twins on the monitors located throughout the store while you shop. I have checked my 3 year old son in a time or two. He enjoys the toys. It is a free service. I am not sure of any others around town. I am sure there are several. Best of luck!

No great advice just a cyberhug coming your way since I completely understand since I have twin boys that are almost 29 months old. There has been a couple occasions where we were shopping with the boys and my husband had to carry the boys out to the car while I finished the shopping because they were being such hellraisers. The funny part was as I watched my husband run down the main isle of WM with both boys screaming people would pass him and roll their eyes at what rotten little boys he had his hands on. Of course, they didn't know I was their mother watching them roll their eyes and laugh at my husband's situation. LOL. Anyway, I guess I'm a little more fortunate since I have a nine year old daughter. She will often push a buggy behind mine with one of the boys in her buggy. Separating my little terrors helps me at least get the necessary stuff in the buggy, I go back later, ALONE, for all the other stuff.

I don't have twins, but I have three small ones and I just don't shop with them. If you work nights, can you take an extra hour on your way home one morning a week to shop? The store is really nice that time of morning, because they stock late at night, so everything is stocked up and in it's place and the store is really empty. It might be a nice time for you to relax for a few minutes before going home too! I also agree with just taking one child - I do that a lot, and one seems really easy after what you've been doing. Good luck!

I can totally appreciate your situation. I have b/g twins who recently turned three. We went through a phase over the last 6m where one or both didn't want to be in the shopping cart. We finally got over the hump and I'm not even sure what changed but it is better now provided that I use the shopping carts that have the two side by side seats built into them (Tom Thumb). I think it is just part of the age and stage as they are beginning to assert their independence more and more (which can be challanging).

Anyway - just a couple suggestions. When it got difficult for me to take them to the store I did everything I could to avoid taking them with me. I would shop for non-perishables on my lunch hour and I would make a quick stop on my way home from work for perishable items (milk, yogurt, cheeses etc). I found that more frequent quick stops to the store on my own was much better than dragging my kids to the store for a longer grocery shop. Every once in a while if I did need something and couldn't avoid taking them to the store, I would take my double stroller and just put my groceries under the stroller and/or used a hand carry basket. I tried to keep store visit as short as possible. From time to time I might even pick up a toy or something they might be interested in and let them play a bit while I got the shopping done. Not a great solution as you don't want them to expect a treat everytime you go to a store, but I think as a mom of twins, more often than not, you just do what works. I've also done the bribe with snack thing while you shop and that worked OK most of the time.

I know it must be hard with your work schedule, and I'm not sure if you are working nights and staying with them during the day when you are sleeping - but God Bless ya!

Best wishes to you!

Any peach trees grow nearby you? I have a switch picked from one last summer, only used it once (2 swats on the upper leg). I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old, and I only have to mention it for things to calm down the way that I want.

Do you have a mechanical horse ride (or other ride) in the front of the store? If you do, I suggest showing it to the boys, telling them its really fun to ride on, and telling them that whoever stays in the basket and helps mommy can ride it when you come out. Then, go into the store for a really short trip, start with 5 minutes, maybe shop for 1 or 2 items with their help, then leave the store and ONLY let the kid(s) that behaved ride the horse. If nobody behaves, nobody rides, if only one behaves, only he rides. Do the same thing, explanation and all each time you go in and gradually stay in the store a few minutes longer each time. When they outgrow the horse, you can go to giving them a quarter for the sticker machine or gumball machine.

I wish I could help but I go through it to.I keep a 2 year old all week long and I have a 3 month old boy.When I go to the grocery store it is terrible.The two year old tries to open everything and the baby cries.The two year old grabs stuff off the shelf and trows stuff out of the cart and throw a fit if she doesnt get everhting she wants i gets pretty crazy sometimes so good luck if you figure something out let me know.I hate going to the grocery store so I feel your pain.

Got twins? I do. Four year old boys. So, I understand what you are saying and I don't think having an anxiety attack in the grocery store is a laughing matter. I only take my twins to the store if I know I'm going to be there to pick up one or two items. Otherwise, they are with dad. This makes my life much better. I suggest getting some help if you can.

Jenifer, you must find a way to give consequenses to his poor and unacceptable behavior.

I don't have twins, so this might be difficult for you, but when my daughter was 3, and having a fit at Target, I had to go to a secluded area of the store and I held her tightly because she wanted to get down.

I didn't allow her to get down, I just held her tightly the entire time she had her fit, not so tight that she was in pain, I was just restraining her. As she began to calm herself down, I loostened my hold on her, if she cranked back up again in an effort to gain freedom, I tightened my hold. She eventually quit fighting me and just sobbed in my arms.

I held her gently until she was comforted, then put her back in the cart and we completed our shopping trip. The whole thing only took about 10 minutes. We never had that issue again.

Sounds like your son is in control, and that terrifies children. He can't be in control, even though he fights for it.

T.

With my two boys (19 months apart), I found that it was worth it for me to shop exclusively at places like HEB where they have fun "carts" for the kids. HEB has racecar carts that have 2 places for kiddos to be strapped in, and they also have the carts that cost $1 to rent and the kiddo is below the cart in a closed-in space.

I've found that LONG trips must be avoided, so getting very familiar with the laoyout of the store and having a list and sticking to it are essential in making the trip relatively quick.

I go loaded with snacks, or plan to get a snack for them while we're there. Sometimes, lettig them out one at a time to "help" get things to add to the basket can help (though that will add time to your shopping trip).
Going first thing in the morning can help - less crowded and the kids aren't 'tired', which makes the trip easier, and if they're still in that "I just woke up and I'm still half in la-la land" phase, you can get an extra half hour to shop in [wink].

It DES get better as they get older! Three was more difficult for me than two was - four is SO much better than three years old! Hang in there - and do try to go shopping occasionally without them! :)

I have done this with both my older boys--I set the ground rules ahead of time: 1. stay in seat 2. don't grab things and 3. no screaming and then go to a store with the special car carts and explain how first offense will get them taken out of the special car and into the seat by mommy and the second offense we will be going home and they will not be returning when I come back to buy my groceries. I have had to leave the grocery store twice, but I just take my groceries to the front, explain to someone there in front of my boys that I cannot buy groceries today because they are misbehaving and then we calmly leave. That is it. No more drama. They each pushed it once and now I can go to the store with 3 boys and relatively little chaos. Don't be afraid of the scene. In fact, have a little fun with it. If you are calmly carrying out 1-2 screaming children, everyone in the store is rooting for you! Line up a friend or a sitter to cover that evening so that you can return IN PEACE and get what you need.

I would suggest either finding a sitter who can stay at your home with the boys, or someone who can go with you to the store to help keep the boys in line. Other than that, I can't think of anything else that would work. I don't want to suggest "bribing" them, because that can start to get expensive, not to mention adding the clutter to your house (which I know you already have, with twins!:) ) Or....since Cody is the "good" one, have a sitter take Roger somewhere so he can run off his energy while Cody is with you. (Cody may decide to go with them, too, sometimes.) Roger may decide that if he wants to get "tiime with Momma", he will need to behave better! :)

Hope this helps, and GOOD Luck!!

~J.~
____@____.com (You can email me personally, and I can help you learn to shop for most of your non-food items online, which can help with your situation, too.)

Distract, distract, distract.

We sing songs (sure I look strange, but at least their not reeking havoc upon the bread or eggs I just put in the cart!)Songs that require them to use thier hands are the best!

Search for colors (can you find something red), shapes, etc.

They get to decide which yogurt they want this week, etc

I praise the one that doesn't get out of the seat in hopes that it'll persuade the other. Sometimes I resort to my emergency stash of stickers in my purse to bribe/reward them.

I also have a list, divided by where in the store it is so we don't ever have to circle back. Usually, we can plan it strategically to where, just about then chaos is going to set in, a sample lady is around the corner!

I haven't really had luck with letting them bring stuff in with them though because then its the fun game of lets drop it over and over and over and see how many times mommy will pick it up! Or that's when you realize you've left a trail of raisins through the whole store!

Feeling your pain,
A.

Oh man, I feel for you. Your situation sounds really difficult. I don't have twins, but I do have one half-way compliant toddler and one really difficult (probably autistic) preschooler. With my oldest, I was totally unable to use carts at all and I always used a stroller (one with no basket even). I figured out that I could hook one of those handheld baskets that they have at the store onto the handles of the stroller. You can carry quite a bit of stuff that way. A stroller might be a last resort for you.

Could you try letting him sit in the basket of the cart to begin with. That way he is not smashing things on his way to get there. Once my youngest was born, I was able to convince my oldest to sit in the basket of the cart. I remind him to sit down pretty often, but he does okay up there.

The real secret for me has been what someone else suggested: distracrion. If we are shopping at Wal-mart or Super Target, I let him play with a toy from the toy department and then we put it back when the shopping trip is over(I always let him know ahead of time that we will not be keeping it. I make sure that he does not rip the packaging. He really likes those toy laptop computers). Sometimes I bring him a snack or a treat to keep him busy. Also, I bought him a handheld Leapster. I love that thing. It really keeps him occupied when I need a few minutes, at the store, doctors office, etc. We also have a V-smile Pocket. It has a bigger screen with better graphics... so it sucks up the batteries like nobody's business. I even bought the rechargable battery for it. The Leapster has been much less maintence. And of course games or singing work well to distract. If you make a game out of what they are really interested in, that works best. My oldest likes numbers and letters, so we used to count. Now I give him words to spell. My little one loves patty cake.

I hope that I helped! Remember, this won't last forever! Even my son, who would totally launch himself out head-first when put into the seat of a cart, has gotten better. He calmed down quite a bit between 3 1/2 and 4 1/2. Good luck!

J.,
I am not sure where you live, but the Signature Kroger in Allen at Alma & McDermott has a "play center" for children starting at age 3. My daughter loves to go there! There are TV screens around the store so you can see what is going on, and they page you if they need you. Not sure what the hours are for sure-- I think maybe 10-6? It might be worth it to shop there, or check around to see what other Krogers may offer the same service.
Good luck!
A.

Quick solution would be to find two other people to babysit with them so you don't have to take them to the store with you. a neighbor teen needing community service hours?

with my neice and nephew that are now 6 and 8 (were 2 and 4 @time) my sister would tell them that if they were good the entire time, they could get a toy after mommy was done, but if they were bad, they would loose a toy when they got home. it took a time or two of her taking their toys and hiding them in her closet, but it got better. I know that no mom can always splurge for two toys, so maybe candy or some cool treat will work. I noticed that, at least with hers, the positive and negative options worked well. My boys are 7 years apart, so I didn't have the teamster approach to bad behavior, but I go to the store at nap time, it's a little more clumsy, but they can't cause problems when their sleeping. If they don't nap anymore, then right before bed. good luck.

Hi J.!

I would try a few different things:

1) set the ground rules firmly. Its going to be hard to do esp since you need to shop, but you say "If you misbehave (and spell out the actions with every detail of what that entails) then we will leave. And as soon as he starts, give him a warning and then leave the store. I know its hard, when you need to get things done- but this will reinforce that bad behavior gets punished. The next time you go in, remind your son(s) that last time you left early and that you will do it again. (Of course you will need to grab one of the HEB workers and give them your cart to re-shelve).. you may want to go to the store when you only need an item or two and try this method out. We used to use it with my son when we'd go out to eat and it was annoying, but we only walked out twice (we took our food to go) :).

2) Try to get him involved. Not sure if this is do-able.. but ask him to count the apples for you and have him bag them. Or have him put the items in the cart- and tell him, you can only put them in if you are sitting with the belt on. Make it "exciting" by saying "okay, next on the list is soup! Can you help me find the soup? Can you put that in the cart for me?" etc. The boys can take turns putting stuff in (or buy two of each item! lol!

3) Give him/them a reward for every few minutes they are in the cart. this will be tough- and later you can do it by every aisle you are in, or maybe just by staying in the cart the whole time.. but say "if you collect 20 pennies from me, then I'll buy you a treat" (or let them do the buddy bucks).. whatever would reward them. Then you take a baggie or small container, and give them a penny for every two minutes. Just as a reminder (and when they start to fidget, you say "sit down so you can get your penny"). If they get out, tell them to give you a penny. Try to make it so that the first time you do this, they get the reward (so they'll want to do it again the next time you go).

Hope that helps!!
Adla

My brother and sister in law have twin almost 4 year old girls and she gives them part of the shopping list that they are responsible for. She made cards on her computer with pictures of some regular items that they would be familiar with. If they have a successful trip and get all of their items, and behave properly, they get a sticker on a chart at home. When they get so many stickers they get a special treat. They started doing so well each time that she had to up the amount of stickers it takes to get a treat.

Hope this helps :)

Is there anyone that will babysit so that you can go to the store in peace? Or, you could get someone, even a ten or eleven year old person to go with you and push the babies in their stroller so that they will not be in the cart at all, and will not be able to get up and run around. They might still cry, but nothing would get broken, they would not get lost, etc.

I only have one so I can only imagine your nightmare! I usually go at lunch time and let him eat his lunch while I'm shopping. It's a treat for him to have chicken and french fries and actually get some shopping done. It's also helped that he knows there are consequences of misbehaving at the grocery store. Misbehave and when we get home he'll spend the afternoon in his bedroom by himself. The first time it was just aweful. He screamed and screamed but the next time we went to the store I went over the "store rules" and reminded him that if he misbehaved then he would have to spend the afternoon in his room. Best shopping trip ever!