Background on my daughter. She has been diagnosed with ADHD, Auditory Processing Disorder (APD) , Generalized Anxiety, Tic syndrome & Sensory Issues.
I've been battling with the school for a few years now on getting an IEP or 504 put in place. I'm setting up another meeting & I refuse to leave the school until one is put in place. My daughters grades are dropping in one particular subject b/c her teacher absolutley refuses to make ANY special accomidations.
My main question is they are currently punishing her by taking away her recess to do work assignments she got wrong AND making her sit alone at lunch indefinatly. She is very socially awkward & adding to that her sitting alone is not helping her to socialize. What laws are there if any against this & what suggestions can I make for them to help her socially?
UPDATE: To answer some of the questons. YES, I had an IEP meeting her Kindergarten & 2nd grade year. Twice her 2nd grade year. She had an awesome teacher last yer & she is now in the 4th grade. I had COUNT IT....THREE recommendations from some of the top dr's in the state specializing in in her disabilities. The school kept brushing it under the rug with the excuse of "Well, she doesnt really need an IEP or 504 b/c she is passing". Everytime, I stepped up & basically said with all do respect I have 3 different dr's & thereapists telling me what she needs here at school, they just ignored it. I got tired of battleing it & b/c she was passing, I too brushed it under the rug. But really, enough is enough & I'm not backing down at this point.
I understand some people have had a much more difficult time with their children but please dont' be so condecending by saying "I would be thrilled if my child could function in a normal classroom". You have NO clue the struggles my daughter has faced to get to where she's at. & the situation should not be downsized b/c she can function. She struggles daily & the school makes it alot more difficult than it should be for her. The teachers don't teach my child, I do. I spend at least 4 hours a night working with her. She is currently barely passing math only b/c that is not something I can teach. She struggles daily & just b/c she is socially akward does not give grounds for her to be ostracized. Her issue at lunch was talking. & I have given the school ever recommendation from the Dr.'s
Just because she's passing doesn't mean she isn't entitled to at least a 504. My daughter has ADHD, is an honor roll student, and has a 504 plan. As long as she has a condition that inhibits a major life function (i.e, ADHD inhibits thinking), she is entitled to a 504. Talk to the school district office, threaten to call the Justice Dept....you'll get a 504!
Hire a professional, and sue the hell out of them.
They are taking away, her outlet of excercise with removing recesses. And they are seculiding an already awkwardly social person.
They are not professionals. If you can not afford to hire somone, then I would put her in a private school that will address these things appropriatly.
She should be able to get a 504 plan or IEP. Don't give up the fight. Our almost 10-year-old son has ADHD-combined type, tics, anxiety, depression and a host of other conditions. He also makes honor roll. Based on his ADHD alone, we have a meeting set up next week to get him a 504 plan. The school didn't flinch when I asked about getting it. We'll see how the actual meeting goes, though.
Our son is smart, but really needs some accommodations. For instance, I'm sick of him being benched just about every day for incomplete homework. Most nights, he forgets to bring home all of the right materials. I asked the teacher for help and she assigned someone to serve as a homework buddy to make sure he had the right materials. That lasted maybe a week. I also don't want him benched at recess at all. Also don't want him marked down for showing anxiety during presentations when he can't do anything about the fact that he has diagnosed anxiety. The list goes on. I'm sure you can relate.
Do what you have to to get this school to comply. I'd take it to the district office next -- call the superintendent. Mention if you don't get the help you need for your daughter, you'll be talking to a disability attorney.
Good luck!
Have you considered hiring a professional advocate? These services don't come cheap, but school advocacy is a rapidly expanding profession because the services are so needed.
I can't speak to the specific laws around this because they vary from state to state, and I don't know TN, but it does sound like you should be getting more help and support than they've been giving you. I just really recommend working with an advocate. Be prepared for sticker shock, but if at all, humanly possible, try having a professional there to advocate for your needs.
What exactly do you mean by recommendations from doctors and therapists? My daughter is ADHD and has an anxiety disorder. These conditions were officially and specifically diagnosed after two thorough evaluations by two separate psychologists, and were just reconfirmed by a third evaluation by another psychologist who works for the district. As far as I know your daughter must receive an evaluation by a mental health professional (psychologist or psychiatrist, not a medical doctor) in order to be properly diagnosed and therefore qualify for these services. In California if the school doesn't want to provide the testing you can go to your own psy/psych. and they (the school district) are required to pay for the evaluation (not sure if that's the same in TN?)
Once you have the official diagnosis the school is required by LAW to provide your daughter with special education and support services, and the teachers are required to make accomodations, so it sounds like what you're lacking is the required evaluation, which is NOT the same thing as a doctor's recommendation.
Call the district office's special ed department and find out EXACTLY what's required so you can get the ball rolling now.
ETA: also your daughter's therapist should be helping you navigate this stuff and be giving you advice because s/he usually knows the system!
I would absolutely put my foot down and tell the school that under no circumstances will my child miss recess because she got her work wrong. It would be one thing if she was fooling around and not doing the work, but to punish her like that for getting it WRONG is just plain wrong! If they wanted my child to miss recess because of work that was incorrect, they better have a teacher in there giving her extra help.
As for the sitting alone at lunch, that would not be tolerated either. I don't know what school your child goes to, but they don't seem very educated or professional and I would be in there putting my foot down and after that, they would find me at the district office making a complaint!
Go get 'em mama!
Have you had a meeting and they determined she didn't need accommodations? Or you haven't even had a meeting?
I thought under Federal Law the school HAD to set up a meeting within 30 days of written request from a parent.
I do see that until they put an IEP in place, they can't make accommodations. They HAVE to treat her *just like every other student*. It's frustrating.... but it will completely throw off the IEP process if they provide accommodations without an IEP in place.
Sitting alone at lunch, though, seems extreme. Is that in their code of conduct in the school handbook as a possible consequence? If not, I would request in WRITING from them why they are doing that and what they hope to achieve.
Does the school have the "official" diagnosis paperwork from whoever provided you with a diagnosis? Can they provide IN WRITING accommodations they request? That may give you something to IMMEDIATELY put in place until you can get a plan put together.
I know when we did my daughter's IEP, we were allowed (but not TOLD, so if you didn't know this.... you just didn't know) to have a Child Advocate present. This would be someone with experience or information about your child.... for example, her pediatrician or if she is already working with a therapist. That also may help your cause.
Also - a social worker was OPTIONAL for the meeting. The parent has to request. Please make sure you ask for these things that not all parents know are available. I would think a social worker would do wonders for addressing the social aspect of your daughter's accommodations.
My daughter scored quite high in anxiety for her IEP testings.... so much so that she was provided an accommodation in that area (I guess you aren't always...... ) anyway one of her accommodations was to leave class and act as PE helper until she could get herself *under control*. We worked with the PE teacher (who had a special ed certification.... that may have helped) who would have her do things like run and get the balls from the locker. Or give everyone a high five..... things so that she could get her energy flowing and get her mind of whatever was building. That did soooooo much for her.
It's a shame that your school is not being more cooperative. I would not give up.... but definitely get EVERYTHING in writing.
Good Luck.
If you're dealing directly with her school you're talking with the wrong people. Call the school district office and ask to talk with their office that administers the Federal Law requiring diagnosis and treatment of these issues. In my state it's called the county Intermediate Education Service District.
Google IEP to get specific information about the law. Here is one site that describes the process. http://ed.gov/parents/needs/speced/iepguide/index.html
In my grandchildren's school, the process is administered thru an office separate from the school that they attend. Their teachers become a part of the team but they didn't initiate the process. My daughter did by calling the Multnomah County Intermediate Education Service District. She got that number from their pediatrician.
As for staying in at recess to complete work, this is done at my granddaughter's school. This happens for all students who don't finish their work during class time. It's not a punishment. It's the chance to get work completed.
She's sitting alone because she's in the classroom finishing work and thus everyone has left the lunch room when she gets there. Again, it's not punishment. It's just a poorly planned way of handling her not getting work done. Instead of fighting over this issue talk with her teacher in a calm, open manner and suggest that she have lunch first and do her work after.
I suggest that somehow you've become involved in an adversarial interchange with the school. I urge you to first contact the appropriate office for getting an IEP and that you focus on improving your relationship with the school personnel where your child attends. Recognize that they're as frustrated as you are with the system and with your daughter's difficulties. When you approach them with anger instead of with an open wish for co-operation they will shut down and not deal effectively with you. Communication is difficult in the best of circumstances. Work on your attitude and get along skills as you approach this with the idea that helping your daughter is in the best interests of both sides, yours and the schools.
When they say they cannot arrange for an IEP ask for specific reasons. Become familiar with the look of an IEP and focus on ways that your daughter would fit in one. Towards this end, I suggest you find and talk with a student advocate. They go by different names in different communities. I'm not familiar with one in my location but if I wanted one I'd start by googling student advocate and IEP process. I'd also ask the Intermediate Education School District office for more info and how to go about getting help.
Where did you have her evaluated? What were their recommendations? Do you have the peperwork? Since she is in a regular classroom, and passing, I do not think you will get an IEP. As far as recess and lunch, take that up with the teacher. I would have been thrilled to,death if my daughter could function In a regular classroom. I would not have had to navigate special Ed hell. The school can only do so much for social issues. That is something you need to work on with her. You can do some role playing.
I say get a lawyer. Not often I say that one!
The school is failing you and breaking laws. It is past time to get a lawyer.
Why oh why do people insists on posting rude condensending responces on here. Everytime I read a question people are so rude with their comments and advice. This women was asking a valid question. She is not asking people to throw rude comments on their own struggles. We all have our own problems. To compare and imply yours are worse is just completely un called for. I wish some women would actually get a life and get off this site if they are only looking to make people feel bad. Sorry just had to add that. I do not have any advice as I have never dealt with any of this. But god bless you it cannot be easy. I would say keep pushing the school. Good luck.
Have you dealt with the school board, not just the school? Principals and teachers are accountable to the board, believe me, a call to the school superintendent's office can often get things moving.
If they are keeping children without disabilities in at recess to re-do work (my nephew's teacher does this) or isolate them at lunch as a discipline, they feel they're "being fair." If not, the school board can educate them on their errors.
My best to you, stay calm, and strong. You lose it and it may get rougher for your daughter.
i have 3 kids with different disabilities. My 16 yo step dtr is MOMR, 13 yo dtr is aspergers w/add and my 10 yo son is adhd. both girls have ieps in place and my son has a 504 plan. The bottom line is the school is going to try to not do anything special for your kid. You have to FIGHT to get them to do it (which legally you need an IEP in place, try to get that over a 504). One teacher tried to have my son sit inside for both recess AND lunch when he didn't listen or finish his work. HELLO! He has ADHD and MUST get out and run around!!! I met with the principal and luckily she agreed. Now its written in his 504 that he can't miss recess or lunch. So you need to go to the school and ask who is in charge of their special ed and make an appointment to get them involved. You have a medical diagnosis and it needs to be addressed. If they don't do anything to make modifications for your child then contact the school board in your district and go from there. Good luck!
Does she have a pyschologist that can get involed? I had to simply bring a prescription from my sons dr.
Not sure about laws in your state, but I'd start throwing around the words special education advocate when dealing with the school. My daughter has perfect grades but receives accommodations based on sensory and social issues.
Unfortunately some school officials find it easier to brush off parents as long as the kids aren't causing "trouble" in the classroom (like pitching fits or bringing down test scores). Contact the principal in writing and cc the school board and the district's special education department and demand that your daughter be accommodated.
It is great that you are able to help her at home, but 4 hours per night is not right!
Time to hitch up your b*tc* panties and let them know that you mean business mama! Good luck.
I think you need more information to suggest alternatives.
Since they are taking away her recess to redo work she got wrong, simply insist that she bring it home instead. This happened to the child of a friend. My friend insisted that any work that wasn't done in class needed to be sent home, that her child was NOT to miss recess to complete it. The parent promised to work on it all in the evening with her child. If missing recess is also punishment for a particular behavior - then punishment for what behavior exactly? If you knew that, then you might be able to suggest an alternative appropriate consequence.
Same for the lunch. Yes, making her sit alone is not acceptable. But is their reasoning that when she sits with others, she melts down or gets out of control because of over-stimulation? If that's the case, is there a way to make sure her class sits in a particular spot that's quieter. Or have her sit on the end of a row at the table so she's not as much in the middle of the craziness? Or are there particular louder kids that set her off, and she just needs to be with some different kids?
I don't know how much support your state provides (schools are mostly controlled by state law, not federal, so their obligation to accommodate students varies by state), but in PA, you can work with a TSS worker who comes to the classroom, observes your child, and helps her deal with situations that come up. The TSS worker has to be written into the IEP, but it really helps a lot, because it gives you a set of eyes in the classroom, and also takes some of the workload off of the teacher, because that person in in place to specifically help your child. Again, I know people who have had them for their kids in my state, but yours might be different. The doctor who diagnosed your daughter should be able to help navigate the system. Good luck.
