Transitioning to a Toddler Bed.

Updated on March 05, 2009
S.B. asks from Pickerington, OH
14 answers

This past weekend, my husband and I moved my 21 month old son in to a new "toddler" room to get the nursery ready for baby number two, due in June. Complete with a new bed. We kept his mattress, sheets and blanket from the crib thinking this may make him more comfortable. Saturday night. he went down very easy and slept through the night. Sunday it was a little harder to get him to fall asleep by him self (90min with the assistance of my oh so patient husband.) The past two nights he has been waking up around 2am and crying uncontrollably until we bring him into our bed, which we never do. I guess my question is, how to get him to go back to being a great sleeper in his new room? Should we try a night light, crack the door open and have the hall light on? Any idea on an easier transitioning would be greatly appreciated.

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D.G.

answers from Cleveland on

My son was never a great sleeper to begin with! We were having the same problems you are at the same time! Finally I just had to be firm with him and let him know that this is his bed now and he is expected to stay in it! Lol! He is very intelligent and has been very understanding of where he is supposed to sleep so far! I will say that leaving the door open to his room was a key factor in him being willing to stay in his bed! Stick with it and don't lose hope! Don't underestimate what they can comprehend at this age! If you do you will likely be heavily taken advantage of! Lol! Have a blessed day!

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D.T.

answers from Indianapolis on

What I would do is put him back in his crib and buy a 2nd crib until he's ready to move - which is usually closer to 2.5 years old. Most experts recommend staying in a crib until age 3 - mostly for safety reasons. If he was sleeping fine in his crib, why move him? I don't get it. Don't fix what isn't broken. Many kids can take weeks to transition to a toddler bed if they aren't ready for it. As for the baby, he/she can spend the first few weeks/months in a bassinet, cradle or pack 'n play. That gives you more time to find a 2nd crib. You can get very nice cribs (some are practically new) second hand. All you need to do is check it out to make sure it meets all the current safety requirements. We've bought 2 cribs and never paid more than $70 for it (including new-looking mattresses).

If you insist on moving him now, at least put him in the crib until he's used to the new room. Make sure you spend several hours a day playing with him in the new room so he's comfortable in there. Once he's really comfortable in his new room (and no longer calling old room his) then try the toddler bed again.

Neither of these may seem like a big deal to adults but they are both HUGE to a 1 year old.

1 mom found this helpful

L.F.

answers from Columbus on

Hi S.,

Sounds like your son is not handling the two big changes, new room, new bed. Is there a way you could get him use to one of the changes first? Like put the toddler bed in his old room until he gets use to it and then move him to the new room or visa versa, put him in his crib in the new room. One thing I would avoid doing at all cost even if it involves loosing sleep for a couple of nights is bringing him into your bed at night. Once he learns this is his "reward" for crying at night and throwing a fuss he will for sure keep that up. (unless you don't mind him in your bed, I know many parents don't mind that) I think the nightlight idea is a good one as well, don't crack the door though, he is safer sleeping in a room with the door closed. Ask any fireman that and that is what they will tell you. Good luck and congrats on your new baby!

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

Usually if my little one is waking at night really upset, I'll take her to the living room and we'll watch something for 15 mins (half a Wonder Pet episode) then it's back to bed. She's usually good after that.

Sit with him comfort him, talk to him about his big boy bed, how wonderful he's doing sleeping like a big boy.

Can't hurt to try this. I hope it works.

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H.D.

answers from Cleveland on

Hi S.,
That's a lot of changes for a little guy ~ a new room & a new bed! Especially in the pitch dark, he's so young to be excited about a "big boy" change, but I totally understand your transitioning him now b/c it'll be an even bigger change when his new sibling arrives (congratulations!). I'd leave a light on for him & leave the door open a bit, maybe he won't feel trapped in a dark room then. Our bedrooms are on the 2nd floor, so we put up a gate at the top of the steps, have a nightlight in the hall, both of our daughters have them in their rooms, & there's one in their bathroom. Good luck!

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R.B.

answers from Columbus on

My son never used a night light until he moved into his new room with his new big boy bed. I would recommend it. I would also discourage bringing him in your bed. I did that with my oldest and it quickly became habit and he demanded to go in our room. It is better to even just lay with him in his bed for a minute or two to establish that that is HIS bed and HIS room. My son took about 2-4 weeks to fully adjust to being in his new room in his new bed. We left the nursery room shut (this was his old room)for a couple months so he would quit associating that room as his. Hope this helps.

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J.A.

answers from Evansville on

Hi. I have two boys seperated by 2yrs and 3 days. We didn't have to do a room transition but did do the 'big boy bed' transition. Actually when we found out we were having another boy we purchased bunk beds. My oldest son sleeps on what would be the top bunk (because it has rails). However, it is set up on the floor, of course. One thing I would warn you of is the cosleeping habit. It is a hard one to break. I've experienced that with both boys! When my little guy wakes in the night I usually go in briefly, caress him a moment, remind him that it's time to sleep, then leave. Sometimes I will leave his door open a bit but w/out a light on. I repeat the process, w/out any talking, if necessary (though usually it isn't) but there have been a couple times where I have sat on a stool beside his bed and rubbed his hair 'til he fell back asleep. Also, I let him take a couple of his favorite small toys to bed (ie Hot Wheels or Thomas the Tank Engine)and we always read a couple stories before saying 'goodnight'. Hope this helps.

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C.R.

answers from Columbus on

I'm just curious, if you have a second bedroom, why not make that the nursery and let him keep his room? You may have a very good reason for doing it the way you are but you little guy isn't even 2 yet and little ones are more attached to their surroundings than we realize. I know our son has a hard time napping or sleeping anywhere other than his room because its comforting to him. Just a thought. Everyone else has said all the other things I was going to suggest already!

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L.D.

answers from Columbus on

I have just read a book on this. In a nut shell, it's important to keep his positive sleep associations. Everything that he was used to in his old room, he needs in his new room...i.e. night light, fan on, music, etc.
It needs to be comforting for him when he awakes so that he can self soothe and go right back to sleep. This book suggests making your bed time routine positive by doing something fun in the bedroom before sleep, such as reading a favorite book. Basically kids thrive on routine, so try to stick with what's normal for him!

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E.S.

answers from Toledo on

Give him time to adjust to the change. Don't punish him for feeling insecure and needing more attention. Give him time and he'll get used to the new room and the new bed.

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M.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

Just keep at it. He will get used to it and be sleeping through the night soon. Sometimes making a big deal of something makes a child more anxious than he otherwise would be. He slept through the night the first night, so he will do it again. In the night, console him but don't pick him up or bring him into your room. I would leave the lighting the same as he was used to in his baby bed.

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M.R.

answers from Cincinnati on

Do you want him sleeping in your bed? If not, you need to stop bringing him to your bed because if you continue this course he will come to expect it. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with bedsharing; I'm just saying that the longer you continue this trend the more he will grow to expect it. It will be the norm and it will be what he has to have to go back to sleep in the middle of the night.

Is he waking and coming into your room or is he waking and crying? If he isn't coming into your room, give him a few moments to try and sort it out and go back to sleep. If he is coming into your room, take him by the hand and silently and gently walk him back to his bed and tell him "It's night night time. I'll see you in the morning."

If you feel like you absolutely must go in and check on him, make sure you are as quiet and plain as possible. Go in, give him a pat on the head/back/belly and say "It's night night time. I'll see you in the morning". For some kids this works. For some kids this only increases the anxiety, wakes them up even more, and then next time they wake they'll cry out for you again for help on how to go back to sleep. Keep in mind that he was capable of sleeping just fine in the crib so he is perfectly capable of doing so in his new bed.

Maybe go to the store and pick out a new stuffed animal for him to snuggle with in his new bed. Tell him the animal will watch over him and keep him company at night and if he wakes up all he needs to do is give the animal a hug. Otherwise, if he's healthy, not sick, not in pain, and not in danger, then you need to let him figure this one out even if it does mean a bit of crying on his part. The crying is because he wants YOU to run in and give him attention.

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S.G.

answers from Indianapolis on

We all deal with change differntly..toddlers even more. I have to tell my 3yr old what we are going to do, and then tell her again when we get to where we are going..and sometimes it's still not easy to get things done. She wants to play. I think your son is just going to take some time to adjust to the new bed and new room. My daughter is still in her crib, even though she is potty trained. I don't want her getting up and coming to my room in the middle of the night..and she sleeps really well in her crib. When we get ready to move her out of the crib, we put the crib matris on the floor so she won't have far to fall is she rolls out. It's hard for toddlers to communitcate what they want or feel...I would consider putting him back in the crib for a while, if that's possible. The new baby can always sleep in a lot more places--infant seat, port a crib, bassanet. I know we had our babies sleeping in their car seat many nights since they slept longer and better in them. We would have it next to us in our room so we could keep an ear out...and then they got a little older, and we used it for confort, we would put the car seat in their room with the baby monitor on so we could hear them, but they would be in their room so they understood that was where they sleep.
Well, I'm not sure if any of that helped, but I hope so.

A little about me:
I'm a Sahm of 12yr son, 7 & 3yr old daughters. I work parttime doing MaryKay and inventory work in the evenings. I'll be married 18yrs this June to my high school sweetheart and soalmate.

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M.P.

answers from Columbus on

We recently transitioned our daughter to a toddler bed, which began with her enjoying her new freedom a little too much. What worked for us was having a night light, and soft music. She transitioned off of the pacifier after she moved to the big kid bed, which brought with it a big kid doll. We've really tried to emphasis how she's growing up and how proud of her we are when she stays in bed, etc. It took us a good two weeks to fully transition, but now she sleeps really well in her big kid bed. Good luck!

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