Transition to a Toddler Bed - Schenectady,NY

Updated on March 02, 2008
D.T. asks from Schenectady, NY
20 answers

My 18 mo old climbed out of his crib several times in a week. He used to sleep from 7:30 pm - 6 am, with perhaps 1 time waking up but putting himself to sleep. He sleeps great in the toddler bed for naps, but now when he awakes ~1-3 am, he runs to the door crying. He wants me to just hold him and "refuses" to go back to bed. I can get him to go back to bed by sitting next to his bed for 40 min, he falls asleep in a somewhat contorted position leaning on me. So he is having trouble falling back aleep in his new bed. I work full time and with his new mobility I am wondering should I just give in let him sleep wiht me, so I can get sleep or somehow encourage him to sleep/go back to sleep in his toddler bed.

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M.P.

answers from New York on

I think he's still getting used to his new bed. I would stay very constitant by putting him back in his bed when he wakes up in the night. Once you start bringing him in bed w/ you it will be sooooo hard to break unless that's ok w/ you untill he's older like 5,6,7. I would give him some time to get used to the toddler bed and hopefully in a few weeks he'll sleep through the night again.

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S.H.

answers from Syracuse on

I had the same problem with my daughter, who is now 3 1/2. She was about 17 months when she fell out of the crib in the middle of the night. We thought she was a bit young for the toddler bed so we compromised and used a pack n play for her to sleep in. We then slowly introduced the toddler bed, by first napping and then within a few months she would ask to sleep at night in her "big girl" bed. The pack n play helped immensely in transitioning her from a crib to a bed. It also reduced her mobility at night which we were afraid of getting into things she shouldn't. I am also a full-time working Mom so my night sleep is precious. Good luck and I hope that this transition smooths out for you!

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S.D.

answers from New York on

I too was having the same exact problem, and posted here (you can search this site and find the many wonderful pieces of advice that were given to me). I found that it's just a process that they go through and to give them time. Putting a gate a his door def. helped a lot, b/c he needed boundries which the crib used to provide for him. I also, took out his nap b/c i was realzing that was making a difference. He evetually worked it out, and really the only difference is that he used to sleep untl 7:30 or 8 in the crib and now he is up at 6:30.

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K.P.

answers from Albany on

My kids climbed out of their cribs very early and we invested in a crib tent....I think they make them for toddler beds, too. It's a netted tent that zips around (shaped like a real tent). I'm sure some will think this inhumane -- but I personally think it's inhumane not to keep them safe.

My almost 2 year old loves the tent and tells me to "zip" every nap and night time.

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E.T.

answers from New York on

For me the key to transitioning my toddler girl (she was 20 months at the time)was making a big deal about it and involving her with picking out her bed. My husband and I decided to go the big girl bed route and use bed rails. We took her to the bed store and showed her the beds and gave her a couple of choices to pick and then also let her pick the bed sheets and covers (with a lot of encouragement from us of course). Once the bed came and we put it together she was very excited. The first night was tough - she cried a bit and asked that I sleep with her but I explained this was her bed and that Mommy was too big to fit in the bed with her. By the third night she was getting in herself and going right to sleep the whole night through. I hope this helps.

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N.F.

answers from New York on

Hi D.,
What I did to help my toddler transition from co-sleeping with us to his own bed, was to begin by putting his toddler bed in our room. That way, he (and I) could just look up and see each other and he felt more secure in making that transition. Now, he climbs in his bed and can put himself to sleep.
Good Luck
N.

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D.H.

answers from New York on

D.,

I am in the same situation to the tee. Last night we got up at 1am and my alarm goes off at 5am. I never went back in my room. Everytime i try to leave the room he wake up again. I know my son is getting two teeth too. I found that out. Even though i knumb his mouth his is still up. Me and my boyfriend take turns who gets up at night but i feel like a kid, We go to bed right after he does. I wont bring him in bed with us though. That is even harder to break - went threw that one already. Now I got to remember that I have the frig taped shut lol. Any ideas to help let me know
D.

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D.F.

answers from New York on

My children are a bit older, but I dealt with this issue. I'd put him back to bed in his toddler bed, comfort him, sit with him if you have to, shortening the length of time each time. Be patient.It may take a week or two. He has to learn to go back to sleep on his own. Good luck

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J.K.

answers from New York on

Please!! I beg you don't sleep with your child! I know how very frustrating it is and how much you need your sleep but sleeping with them is not the answer it starts a new problem. My daughter is a terrible sleeper and always has been. She is 3 now. I had to learn to gradually let her cry it out. eventually you have to go in but try to make it longer and longer periods of time before you go in to comfort them again.
If they know your going to come in and stay with them until they fall a sleep then they expect that to happen each time. If you sleep with your child then it condtions them to always expect that and you will never be able to sleep alone. I am a single mom and I have never let her in my bed. I have a close friend who did that and her son is almost 5 and will not sleep alone. Keep trying! Its not easy but eventually they will know that you won't come to rescue them and get them back to sleep and before you know it they will do it by themself. I used to get a bedtime schedule and stick to it.
I would give her a warm bath with soothing soap, read a story or let her have things with her that were comforting like her favorite bear and stick to guns!!! When its time for bed and try hard to not give in. Good Luck!!

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N.K.

answers from New York on

Don't do it!! Once our little guy started sleeping in our bed, he was in it every night! We just got him to sleep in his own bed most nights with the help of the "sleep fairy". He was 4 in November. He still creeps into our bed some mornings, but it is usually around 5am and I'd rather have him snuggle in than get up at that hour. Back rubs, a favorite story, a relaxation tape, etc... Also, if you can figure out what is waking him up. I think with our son, he was flipping himself out of his toddler bed, so we put him in a bed with side rails and that worked for a while. Sorry for rambling. My morning time just got cut short. :-)

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C.S.

answers from Rochester on

I really like the book called The No Cry Sleep Solution. Has lots of good ideas to peacefully get your child to sleep. Sounds like he already has pretty good sleep patterns, so I wouldn't disrupt that by bringing him into your bed. He's probably anxious about the new bed at night. One idea in the book that worked for us is staying close by and slowly moving away from him over time. If he is comfortable with going to sleep on his own initially, great! Then at night wakings, tell him you'll stay by his bed until he falls asleep. If you need to, hold his hand until he falls asleep. Don't get in the habit of crawling into bed or holding him unless you find it necessary and don't mind doing it for a long time in the future. Do this for a week or so. Once he seems comfortable falling asleep that way, move a little closer to the door. Make tiny steps a week or so at a time. It will relieve his anxiety slowly, because you are having him slowly face a tiny bit more anxiety and overcome it. I'd check the book out of the library and skim through it as soon as you have a chance! Good luck!

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D.V.

answers from Elmira on

You might just put him back in a crib he may not be ready to sleep in the toddler bed? I have ten kids and some of them were not ready to obey at that age. You do need your sleep. Putting him your bed at this age could create a bigger problem down the road, been there done that! Hope this helps!~D.

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K.R.

answers from New York on

Hi D.-
Your son seems a little young for a toddler bed. Do you see how he climbed out of the crib? He may be using the "bumpers" for leverage. If you remove the bumpers, he may not be able to climb out(that's how my son was getting out of the crib). The website www.onestepahead.com sells this item that looks like a tent that attaches to the crib. It will prevent him from climbing out. Just read the specifications beacuse certain cribs it will not fit (like mine) It's not safe for an 18 month old to be getting out of his bed and running around.

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D.C.

answers from New York on

Just wondering if you have night lights in his room? My son is still a little afraid of the dark and I noticed when all the lights are completely off, that's when he's up and down in the middle of the night. When I keep all the night lights on or just dim the main light so there's just enough so he can see the room, he stays in his own bed though the night. He started sleeping in a toddler bed about 4 months before he turned 3. He's almost 5 now...Some nights I would joke around with him and pretend I was going to sleep in his bed, which he thought was hilarious but kicked me out because it's a "big boy bed and not for parents" :) I also made a BIG deal out of it in the mornings when he stayed in his bed through the night. We'd call the family up to tell everyone he spent the night in his big boy bed.

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E.H.

answers from Buffalo on

For one thing he`s too young for the toddler bed.He should be in crib so he can`t get out on his own and in a room near you or in your room.Unless you like doing what you are doing this is what i would do and it worked for me i had 4 kids.

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R.M.

answers from New York on

My son is 6 yrs old and it's just 1 year since we moved to a 2 bedroom apartment, before he had his own bed and would sleep in it but it was in the same room with his father and me. Since we moved and he has his own 2 bedroom he still do not sleep through the night by himself only sometimes if he's really tired, so I would lay down with him in his bed until he falls asleep or sometimes he would lay in my bed then falls asleep, but I try not for him to sleep im my bed so I'll lay with him instead.

At their age they like to be cuddled a lot but I would not suggest that you practice him to sleep in your bed for eventually, he would not want to sleep in his own bed.
Hope this will help you just lay down with him until he falls asleep or if he falls asleep on your bed then take him to his room and put him in his own bed.

R..

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E.W.

answers from New York on

Hi D.! I have a 17month old who is just starting to transition to his toddler bed. The big difference is he is transitioning from MY bed to the toddler bed. Once they get in your bed, it is very hard to get them out. I would advise against putting him in your bed if you can, but of course if your not getting any sleep, you need to do what you need to do.

I would suggest, if it's possible, to put a bed or mattress in his room and sleep in his room with him. This way, when he wakes in the middle of the night, he will see that you are still there and may just go back to sleep on his own. If not, you may be able to comfort him without getting out of bed. This is what I've been doing with my son, and if I comfort him as soon as he wakes, he goes back to sleep much quicker! I hope this helps and good luck!

Liz

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M.K.

answers from New York on

D,

I always let my kids roll into bed with me,
As long as he spends the majority of the evening in his own bed you will not have any trouble,

He needs to know he can come to you,

If you keep changing his routine by sitting next to him he will never relax long enough to feel comfy in this new bed

Instead of sitting, cuddle him close bring him into your bed, and fall asleep, at somepoint try and carry him back to his own bed, so he wakes up in there, eventually his visits to you will dwindle down to very few.

When he wakes leave his door open, and put a few night lights in his room and the hallway, when you hear him wake call him to you, and pull him into the bed, after he quickly drifts off to sleep carry him back to his bed,

the key is having him wake in his own bed, thats how they get comfortable with the space, and every sound and sight is familiar to them,

Aslo making sure he naps in that room helps too.

Good luck

M
Mother of 3

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K.C.

answers from New York on

This is just a thought,maybe getting rid of the toddler bed altogether and get him a big boy bed with rails. He may feel a little more secure with the railings. My daugther couldn't get use to the bed being so low to the floor and loves her big girl bed.

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L.L.

answers from New York on

Can you put him back in a crib or was he climbing out? He's still young enough to be in a crib, maybe he'd feel safer? Our oldest is 3 and still in a crib, he loves his crib and has his whole little "set-up" in there, with his animals and stuff...

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