Toddler Won't Stay in Stroller

Updated on May 25, 2008
K.C. asks from Philadelphia, PA
17 answers

This question is for anyone who has/had a highly active toddler. My son is 28 months old, and is EXTREMELY active, don't get me wrong, he does not have ADHD, there are times that he will play quite calmly coloring or driving cars/trucks etc. However, when we go out, he has one speed, RUN! I can take him on short walks to the park etc and handle the contsant running (I also have a 3 month old whom I carry), but since we live in the city, I can't be pushing a stroller for when he gets tired, carry my daughter, and chase him without going insane. We have always gone on long walks to run errands and see friends, but I just can't do it anymore because he fights so much. Also, no matter how I buckle him in, he can get out (he can even get out of his car seat). So I have two questions, 1) how can you keep a little Houdini in his stroller happy (snacks, books, toys don't work most of the time) and/or 2) how do I get him to stay with me walking if I let him walk?

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K.W.

answers from Scranton on

Hubby and I have the Eddie Bauer from target the monkey backpack "leash" don't like to call it that but it works I get compliments everywhere I take it and people are always asking me where I got it, I think I paid like 10 dollars for it or something, and my 32 month old LOVES her "monkey" and loves to wear him! And I can keep track of her! Good luck =)

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M.N.

answers from Philadelphia on

I don't know what kind of stroller you have, but we just got a double jogging stroller and it has been fabulous for us. My oldest son loves sitting next to his brother and "talking" with him. Before I had one where he was in the front seat and the baby was in the back and he hated that because he was so far away from me.

My son is also extremely active and generally fights me when I put him in, but there are places I let him run around (like in a park when I'm right there) and places I won't. He has come to accept it. The seat belt is a 5-point harness and he cannot get out because it is difficult for his hands to push both sides at the same time.

I also take him to a place where he can run for awhile BEFORE I expect him to sit for a bit and he does a lot better that way.

Best of luck! I know it can be challenging, but I hope you find a solution that works for you:)

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L.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

i use a a well plain out it is a leash on my daughter she is 3 years old. also you can always put the baby in stroller let him try help push her use his a little of his energy plus a little easier on you.

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E.S.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I read the other responses first, and have to say that now I'm leaning toward buying one of those backpacks for my son. He's a wild man and while I still use the stroller for outings in public, he can easily climb out of it and does frequently. I have 2 older ones also, and they never gave me the problems that this one does, so I never had to use one of those leashes. And yes, I was one of those people that gave funny stares when I saw kids on leashes, but not anymore. Now I've considered duct tape and handcuffs on occasion! It's true, your kids' safety is more important than what other people think. I'd suggest the backpack, I know I'm going to get one for my monkey after reading this. I hope this helps you, because you've actually helped me!

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B.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My youngest daughter is around the same age as your son. She is not a huge stroller fan while my oldest rode in it until about age 4. If we are just going for a leisurely walk then I will give her the option of riding in her stroller or she must hold my hand at all times. She always chooses to walk. Part way through the walk she will start to balk and I will tell her the next time she will have to ride in the stroller if she doesn't hold my hand. But I think after a while her hand starts to hurt from my grip. When this happens I tell her to hold my finger and this usually does the trick.

If I am on a mission at the mall where she must ride in the stroller then I just tell her it is not negotiatble at this time and she is okay with that. Also I typically won't buckle her in which makes her feel some sense of freedom.

As for the car seat do you have a 5 point harness? I would think that they would be harder to manipulate for little hands. We have a Britax Marathon and neither of my girls tried to escape. Of course that just might be their personality.

Be firm and set boundaries so that he knows what to expect. There will be some times when things are negotiable and other times when Mommy says this is the way it is going to be. I hope this helps!

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C.H.

answers from Pittsburgh on

When my son was that age I got him a harness that looks like a doggy backpack, but it has a long tail for me to hold onto, otherwise he was always running away. Another option might be one of those tricycles with a handle for you to hold onto, then he might feel more independant

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J.R.

answers from Philadelphia on

I LIVE FOR THE LEASH! I have several...one in each car and with each set of grandparents. My 2 year old knows he must be on the leash if he isn't in the stroller (he even asks for it)! They are the best thing ever and worth the $10 or so for your sanity and peace of mind. Some older people look at me like I am crazy but I can't count the number of moms and grandmoms who have asked me where I got mine. Good luck!

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S.L.

answers from Philadelphia on

The best thing in the world are those toddler stuffed animal leashes at Walmart. Ours looks like a Monkey that fits like a backpack. This has been our lifesaver for my toddlers. They can walk when they want and I don't have to worry about them running off and getting lost in a crowd. Some kids are just high energy and this helps you have a peace of mind that he won't run off without you.

C.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Wal Mart has these great backpacks either shaped like a dog or a monkey. My DD (33 months old) knows that if she doesn't want to be in the stroller (she is really getting to big for it anyway) she must be on her "doggie". I have never had an issue with her using it. I do get stares from people but most are good stares! LOL I can't tell you how many people have stopped me and said "What a great idea. I wish they had them when my kids were little"
And for those who don't like the leash, too bad.

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B.W.

answers from Erie on

Hi K.,

What I'm going to suggest sounds awful .. . .but it's safe. :-) Have you ever seen kids on leashes ? they have these leashes that, I think, come with a chest harness, and that way your child can't run too far. It also prevents someone else from grabbing your kid and making off with him. I know it sounds a lot like walking the dog, but I've seen the on the ski slope to keep a young (say 4 - 5 yr old from flying down the mtn out of control; and in malls. If he has the option of sitting in the stroller, OR walking, with the tether, then he'll have some control, but you can also tell him it tethers Mom to him, so YOU don't get lost. My sister had a friend who did it that way, and said that Mom was on the leash. It sounded better to her, but it DID work. :-) Then, try to give him things to be looking for. Maybe if he's working harder with his eyes and mind on the walk, he won't be so quick to be using his feet !! (I never had boys, but I did have girls who would want to walk the stroller, so we'd bring it on walks (usually 1-2 miles in those days) and when the child got tired, the stroller got some use. The longer the walk, by the way, the more tired he'll get !! (if that's helpful to you ?? Like near bedtime ? hee hee

Good luck ! someday you'll see some other mom out walking with the exact same problem, and you'll look at your teenager, and start to laugh. and no one will know it's because you have an affinity with the unknown mom and are laughing at your old self -- not because you are laughing at her.

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G.F.

answers from Altoona on

I had a similar problem with my toddler when she was that age, and what I did was get one of those backpack harnesses. Well the first solution I came up with was to use a dog collar as a belt and use a dog leash on her, but that was out of desperation at Wal-mart. After that incident I went out and bought one of these: http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=4837494 but her's was Elmo. She learned that she could run to the end of the leash but no further, and while that frustrated her to no end to begin with, we stuck it out. She had two choices, either stay in the stroller or walk on the leash. Eventually she learned to stay close to me and hold my hand.

Though I would start enforcing your 3-yr-old to walk too. It's not healthy for her to constantly be carried. If you're interested, another great way to get your son to stay close is make walking a game. Follow the Leader works well with our step-twins. The two of them hold hands and then they each hold one of our hands, keeping them between us, and making the walking itself interesting. I wouldn't recommend that for long walks, but for trips like that I would get a double stroller so they're both riding.

Just my two cents, hope it helps.

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H.W.

answers from York on

K....have you considered the sit and stand stroller? there was a discussion on this recently...I'm not exactly sure how to browse the archives, but it might be just the solution you need. My kids are 28 months apart and this is what we did. My daughter didn't like riding in a "baby stroller" but was not old enough or big enough to not ride in a stroller in many environments. This would allow your son to sit on a bench in back or stand on the back of the stroller (kind of like the back of the shopping cart) with the baby in front. You might also want to consider one of the wrist straps that goes around his wrist and yours as well (kind of like a leash...but that never sounds quite right) so when he does walk, he has to stay with you.

We also had a little Houdini in my son...we found the Jeep stroller with the 5 point harness kept him in better than anything else we tried. We would push the chest pad up very high...it worked for us. To give you an idea of how well he can wiggle out of stuff...at a recent trip to the dentist they had to use a soft restraint on him so he didn't hit or bite the hygenist and he slipped out of it - they said they had NEVER seen a child do that before! For the record...he has a severe sensory processing disorder and is highly orally defensive so anything going near his mouth is a battle.

Good luck...I hope some of this helps.

E.C.

answers from Pittsburgh on

My daughter is around the same age as your son. She will not stay in a stroller and would rather walk (or run) around. I purchased one of those backbacks with a strap that attaches to your wrist. All you do is put the backpack on your son and velcro the other end of it to your wrist. Kind of like a kid friendly leash. They work and the backpacks look like stuffed animals and have a pocket for the kids belongings!
Good luck.
BTW- I purchased mine at Wal-mart, in the baby/toddler section.

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D.P.

answers from Pittsburgh on

Hmmmm..a leash may work! I loved this phase: I don't want to sit in my stroller but after I walk for 3 minutes I want to be carried! LOL
Just do the best you can. I agree that maybe if the baby is in the stroller you could maybe hang onto his hand and he could help you push.
What about a few toys that are "stroller only" that hold his interest and he only gets them when he's in the stroller so he doesn't get too used to them?

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E.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

I have the same issue with my son. Leash him! It's the only way to go. I have gotten some looks on occasion, but... The kid is safe and I know where he is at all times. He has a bad habit of going limp on me while walking so I just pick him back up with the leash and drag him along (horrible I know) I also just got a sit and stand and am hoping that this will help. That way he can stand and I can loop the leash through the harness as well so he can "push the stoller too". They grow up sooner or later (so I am told) hopefully one day they will understand hold my hand and walk!!

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R.S.

answers from Philadelphia on

Like many others who have responded, I have one of those backpacks for my daughter that has a "leash." I purchased it at Target. Yes, sometimes I get looks, but I'd rather get a look than have my daughter take off running, me not catch up to her, and have her get hit by a car, get lost, etc. Better safe than sorry and better to have looks than an unsafe situation. I also recently got a Little Tykes wagon for my daughter. It has two little seats in it, one of them lifts up and stores snacks, drinks, etc., and it has two drink cup holders. It does have safety straps and I have found she prefers to ride in it rather than a stroller lately, as I think she feels like she has more freedom in the wagon. We have taken it to the zoo, parks, etc. and she loves it. Whatever you decide, good luck and be firm with him!

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L.B.

answers from Philadelphia on

You need to be tough with him K.. I know its hard but my biggest mistake with my oldest was not following through with punishments and she is a bit of a nightmare today (she is 16).

If he wants to be a big boy and walk then he needs to be a good listener and cooperate. If he chooses not to cooperate then he HAS to ride in the stroller. Sometimes these toddlers just torture us with their testing and the big battle of wills! The idea of the backpack with a leash-type mechanism is a good idea but he will likely fight that too.

Its a potentially dangerous situation to have him running around the streets of the city so I'd be really stern.

Good luck.

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