Toddler Fighting Getting into Car Seat

Let the other parents stare!! I am sure they understand unless they have perfect children! :)
It is a must so you will have to continue the battle until she gives in obviously.
I would make it fun, like a race and start counting and say "hey let's see how long it takes you to get into your seat!!" then do ready, set, GO!
Or you could do what a friend of mine did, her daugther had issues with her carseat and she drove her almost 3 year old to the police dept and had an officer explain why it is a law, that it protects her and all that and it was never an issue again, promise, hee hee.
She is probably tired at the end of the day, which just makes things hard. I would seriously consider having your local fireman, or police officer or even a trusted teacher explaining the safety factor...it works for my kids if someone else sometimes explains things! :)
Good luck.

I demonstrated to my son what might happen if we got into a wreck by driving a little in the parking lot then slamming the brakes. No damage done, but after falling out of his seat he understood the danger and doesn't complain.

Ask her to help you buckle or both of my kids get gum/candy if they get in good. My daughter sometimes will not want to she will sit in the middle between the two car seats but all I have to do is ask if she wants that piece of gum/candy (usually like one skittle) they say not to use food as a reward but its a skittle its not a cheeseburger. It works and they are happy. Now my son wants to do everything himself so he is beating me to the door and gets in so he can buckle himself in, or attempt to his carseat is a bit hard to buckle fully.

Your daughter is totally playing you. She is making sure she has the upper hand, and by you trying lots of different things, she is winning. She is just waiting to see what mommy will do next, and doing everything she can to keep you from accomplishing your goal. I wouldn't leave it up to her to get in the car. She is only 2 1/2. I don't see a problem with carrying her out the door and putting her in the car. I think sometimes as our children get older and start to do things on their own, we start to expect too much from them. I wouldn't consider her "big girl" enough to get in the car and in her car seat on her own. If you are consistent with this, she will catch on that you mean business, and you can tell her that when she is bigger, she can get in her seat by herself, but for now, she is not big enough. Let the other parent's stare. It's not like their kids have never thrown a fit before.

It's pretty normal. At least I hope it is, because if not, we're both in trouble. My 2 1/2 year old sometimes gets in like a sweet little behaved thing, and most of the time he screams as I wrestle him in. And that's on top of his lightening-quick dash around the inside of the car, climbing all over the seats and turning on all the lights and blinkers, etc. He's a crazy kid!
I started reading the book Parenting with Love and Logic (I got it at the library) and it gave me the idea to give him a choice. I had a very hard time trying to think of choices for each situation. I think the one I came up with would be approved by the authors.
I ask him if he wants to get into his car seat by himself, or if he wants Mommy to do it. If he doesn't answer, that means I do it.
It took him several times to realize I was serious, and that meant I was still wrestling him in. But he's slowly getting into his car seat more often without a fight. He is realizing that he doesn't like getting chased and wrestled in, and that he has the choice to avoid that if he does it on his own.
Good luck!

I left my child on the sidewalk and got in the car and started the car. she went into hysterics and i waited a minute and then got out and asked if she was ready for the carseat and she was fine after that