To Potty Train or Not

Updated on March 28, 2010
S.C. asks from Los Angeles, CA
9 answers

My son is 22.5 months and he show signs that he might be ready. He always tell me when he just pooped and doesn't mind sitting on the toilet. He even brings me his diaper to change. Do you think it's too early? I started potty-training my daughter around this time, but never planned to with my son until he's at least 3. Just assumed boys take longer to learn, so didn't want to stress about it.

But what do you think? And if I should try...how in the heck do you potty train a boy? No clue! If you have had success, please let me know. I don't want to buy any programs on potty training....just you mom's advice. :) If there's a schedule or plan that I can follow..please be so kind to lay them out for me. I'm better with a step-by-step guideline (i.e.put baby on the toilet first thing in the morning)
Well, I will truly appreciate anything.
btw,how does a boy sit on a toilet (i have the removable seat) without shooting out? do you hold his tinki winki down? :P

Thank you.

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D.S.

answers from Tulsa on

I had potty chair for poop but this was 20 yrs ago and yes he sounds very ready. for pee i bought a step stool and had him pee in toilet you can use a ring or a cheerio for him to pee on. also any man in the house goes to the bathroom taga long goes to if he sees the big boys do it he wants to be a big boy too. reward with him picking out his own underwear when he is fully trained. HINT.do not make him lift the lid just wipe the seat off before you go
I tried to teach my son to lift the lid and one day it fell on him. he reverted for a while obviousely oh by the way running water helps

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E.M.

answers from Denver on

Don't miss the "window" if he is ready. My sister potty trained her son at 20 mos. By the time he was between 2.5 and 3 years old she swore there was no way she would have been able to potty train him because he was a terrible two. She was thankful she did it while he was still agreeable!

My younger daughter is potty training and is the same age as your son. Older sis potty trained later. I think younger sibs potty train earlier sometimes if they see the older sib doing it. Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful

K.I.

answers from Spokane on

Alright here is what worked for us, when you feel your boy was ready:

~Pick a long 4 day weekend or something (I am a SAHM but as far as scheduling goes you need AT LEAST 4 full days!)
~Before day 1 talk with him about getting big boy underwear and having no more diapers.
~Take him to the store and let him choose underwear OR surprise him with what you know are his favorite cartoon/themes!

First thing on Day 1 take him to the bathroom "Lets see if you have to go potty" If he goes clap, yeah! High five!---If he doesn't "Nice/Good Try" and a High Five!***
Put him in underwear and some sweats or pj bottoms that he can pull up and down easily (although I always helped with the clothes so they wouldn't have to hold it or get frustrated by not being able to do it all by them selves-don't worry, he will eventually get the hang of this)

From then on out don't go back to diapers and ask him every 15-30mins if he "want to try to go potty"? Watch him like a hawk and look for any signs that he might have to go...squirming,holding himself,etc. Take him to "try" at least once an hour "Lets go potty"...but it works best to watch for signs and let him try EVERY TIME he says he wants to ,EVEN THOUGH most times he will say he wants too...sit there...and nothing will happen, I know it will be frustrating but you gotta indulge him here! :)

If and when he has accidents (because he could have lots or he could have a few, depends on him) DON'T make a big deal out of it! "Uh-Oh, lets get you cleaned up" then change him into dry clothes and forget about it!

Keep this up for the whole long weekend. Should work out just fine, easy...no biggie!

---I just told them to hold down their lil' tink winki's...but after only a few days they were ready to just stand (on a step stool at reg. toilet, I am not a separate baby toilet kinda girl-YUK!) and then just tell them to hold on to it and point it toward the water...don't worry, they get it!

***I bought Dum-Dum suckers to give every time they went potty on the toilet...they are small and an exciting treat...I am not overly anal about sweets...everything in moderation!

I am sure you know that all kids are different and you have to watch for signs that your kid is ready (I think your son is ready), I knew when they started waking up dry and being open to sitting on the toilet that mine were ready....my first son was 25 months old when he was completely (day and night) potty trained and my last son was 26 months!One had lots of accidents and one hardly had any and I didn't use pull ups on either.
My last baby, and only girl is now 25 months and is in the very early stages of showing interest.

Good Luck!

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R.M.

answers from Nashville on

I am in the middle of potty training right now, so I am just going to give you a few tips. I am not doing a scheduled step by step sort of thing at all, so you would probably want to disregard my approach. I call it the Slacker Mom's Guide to Potty Training. :)

My tips from my experience and other mom's advice are:

Don't force him to sit on the potty forever- it can make them rebel because really, who wants to sit on there for half an hour til something just happens by accident? Kids get bored and fight it if you do that. 5 minutes and an honest "try" should be sufficient.

I've heard that starting them out sitting down makes it easier to get them to poop in the potty, where as standing up to pee means you have to teach them 2 separate things. We're still working on poop, so I can't vouch for that, but that is what I've heard.

Someone already mentioned not lifting the seat for a while.

Let him go naked. My son loves to be naked all day and this is how he learned control. I don't even have to set a timer or anything, he has figured out how to stop it if he starts to pee and holds it and tells me, because the few accidents he had (don't freak out about them) we talked about and just cleaned them up, and he didn't want to have accidents. (Just like Tania described)

Get a seat with the little shield or bump and that helps them not pee all over. I know you already have a seat but I love the one from Baby Bjorn. It adjusts onto the seat and is very stable, and has just enough of a hump that it deflects the pee. It comes off easily but tightens down so that it doesn't wiggle. I got it at drugstore.com on sale with free shipping for about $25. The cheaper ones I have seen/tried are very wobbly. My son figured out very quickly how to learn forward enough that the pee didn't go over the bump. He doesn't even have to hold it, just lean down a little.

I personally wasnt into a separate potty chair that required cleaning after every potty break. I do know people that swear by them and leave them in the room where you spend most of your time, but I didn't want a potty chair in my living room.

Let him watch everyone go potty in your house so he can see how it's done. Especially dad. Have dad talk up his big boy undies and how cool they are. And when it's time to buy big boy undies buy the same kind dad has.

Don't push or stress about nighttime potty training until he can stay dry overnight most of the time. They say you shouldn't go back and forth between diapers and pullups and undies to confuse the kid, but I think if you do one thing consistently in the day and diapers consistently at night it should be fine. Or if you choose to do pullups they will work at night (not sure how absorbent they are though.) I am not planning on doing pullups, I plan to go straight to underwear once he has some success with pooping on the potty.

I am being very relaxed about it. I figure since mine was so young when he first started peeing on the potty, I have plenty of time to do it without making it a big deal. If he is 3 going on 4 and still not done, then I will try more agressive tactics. My issue currently is how to get him to tell me he needs to poop, and not to just go in a diaper. Like I said, slacker mom approach. But the tips above can work regardless of how you want to go about it.

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S.S.

answers from Santa Barbara on

S-
I would give it a try and if it looks like he's ready. Hallelujah! BTW, there's a whole orchestra and choir singing it. LOL! My son was four and it was a challenge, so if you're starting to see progress, I would start, but if it backfires, no worries... there is plenty of time. As for standing, my son only did this when he was tall enough to not pee everywhere. Oooh, well even at 11 he's still not very good, but he gets to clean the bathroom if he leaves it a mess.
I so hope he's ready and it is an easy process.
S.

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D.W.

answers from Indianapolis on

I love Sandy's response with the choir singing.

I agree with her that it can't hurt to encourage him if he's ready. The fact that you're basing it upon his cues and not your desires is a big part of the possible success vs. failure.

Our daughter will be 2 on Saturday - she's showing no interest, so we're waiting until she does. Our son was past his 3rd birthday before we could get it to click. It had to be on his terms.

Good luck.

T.C.

answers from Albuquerque on

Hi SC,
I potty trained both my boys before the age of three (the first at 2 yrs 9 mo; the second began right at 25 months, and is not yet 3); and no one can say my boys aren't like most boys: one is *very* single-minded, and would have stayed in diapers forever if I had let him; the second is the "typical" ball-throwing, worm-digging, high pitched squealing type (LOL!) -- so, don't believe you have to wait until 3 years.

The best advice I *ever* got was from another mama who potty trained 5 kids all the same: when *you* are ready (for her, "ready" meant when the kid starts making "logs" in their diaper - lol), let them go "commando" around the house (I did it in the back yard in the summertime), she literally just let them go around the house with no pants, underpants, or diapers all day long.

When they "go," you say, "Oh, you're peeing" or "Oh - you're pooping. Put it in the potty." With direct feedback like that from you (yes, you have to watch them like a hawk -- that's why YOU have to be ready) like that, they "get" what you want pretty quick.

That's all my advice: I know you will get some more from some great mamas!

Good luck!!!
t

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L.B.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

I would train your son the same way you trained your daughter. Generally I think boys sit on the potty for peeing and pooping when they are first learning. Standing to pee takes practice and is something they pick up when they are older.
It sounds like he's ready to roll and will just take to it. Just don't push it. Let him take the lead!
Good luck!

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J.L.

answers from San Diego on

Hi S C, I think the reason why young parents have potty training strungles because instead of parenting controling the training, the children are in charge. Before my husband and I even got pregnant, I told him I had a few insists, (this was 26 years ago) I told him no pacifires, no bottles past one year, no babysitters and no 2 year olds in diapers, it wasn't about them showing signs of being ready, it was about the parents being parents. Our children are 26, 23, and 20 and we stuck to it all. Boys are not harder our boys were 19 months and 21 months when they were potty trained, our daughter was 22 months, she would have been younger as well, but at the start of her training we got orders to move over seas, with all that had to be done we decided to wait till we got to Japan, I trained her in 2 days at age 22 months in a hotel on a regular toilet, by 2 years my husband was teaching our boys how to stand up and go. Potty training is not as hard as I see parents making it out to be. In the past 13 years i have potty trained daycare children successfully by the age of 2, reward and discipline, shopping for panty's and underwear, and making it fun, even though we used discipline, we made it fun, kids thrive on praise and making mommy and daddy happy and pround. Tips, don't yell, it be liddles children, no diapers or pull ups. I have done this many times and over te years and through my own experience I have discovered that success or no success in potty training is more about the parents than the child. J. L.

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