To Find Out or Not?

See....I'm a big one for finding out. I loved knowing what was growing inside.....getting to name them early. I felt like it was so real....little Riley is in there. I enjoyed getting to go and shop for my boys or my girl. That's what got me through. Not to mention I'm not big on mint green or yellow. I wanted my boys to look like boys and my daughter to look like a girl. After 2 boys I wanted some major pink going on. That's just me...I'm not much for the neutral.

Actually being able to get pregnant was surprise enough for me. Once 20 weeks hit, we both knew that we wanted to find out. I'm pregnant with the second and we found out it's another girl. There's still lots of surprises left in life and I don't feel badly for wanting to know. Every day with a toddler is a surprise. Her personality was a total surprise to me as well. The gender of your baby is only a small part of what life has in store for you!

1st time around we did not find out. 2nd time around my husband did NOT want to find out so I decided not to tell him and find out myself. The truth is each person has to decide for themselves but in my case my attitude was there are enough things we worry about for the baby while its in utero that I just didn't want to worry or wonder about one more thing than I already was concerned about. The more you can cut out the emotional concerns during pregnancy the better. Any stress has an effect on the fetus as much if not more than it does on you, the mother. I would bite the bullet and just find out. Why would you regret it? Just go for it! Feel well and be well.

I am almost 15 weeks into my third pregnancy and this time I am so tempted to find out. I didn't find out with my first and it was such an awesome surprise to give birth to boy. With my second I had no intention of finding out but my second son was very proud of his appendage and it was in plain view. Even though I never asked the u/s tech to confirm it, I knew it was a boy. I kinda liked knowing but kept it to myself for the remainder of my pregnancy. Either way was great and I am so torn this time around. I love my two little boys and wouldn't mind another but I am hoping for a little girl and am anxious and basically impatient to know.

Do whatever it is you and your husband want to do.

I found out and it wasn't a bit less fun knowing (although I can't compare my experience to not knowing).

I'm not going to say one way or another what you should do, but really, are you ruining the whole experience by not being "surprised" when the baby comes? Sure, it is one major detail that you will already know but will it make the occasion less significant?

Search your heart and decide what is best for your family!

I say find out just incase you are having a girl this time.......we were surprised the first time, but not the 2nd.

I'm on baby #2 and am having my ultrasound on Wednesday. I didn't find out with baby #1 and I'm not going to this time either. I like the surprise at the end. To me, it's like Christmas. Like if you knew you were getting a purple sweater. You know what it is...might not know what it looks like...but you still know what it is. Personally, I would think it would take some of the fun away. I had an emergency c-section with baby #1 and I remember the doc saying a boy. Then I couldn't wait til I actually got to see him.
But remember, you could have an ultrasound and they say girl...and it comes out and it's a boy. So then you've got a room full of pink stuff and a little boy that you've been calling a girls name for 4 or 5 months.
It's purely a personal decision. Make sure your husband and you are on the same page as to if you want to find out. And don't forget the rest of your family too. Grandma's and Grandpa's might really NOT want to know. Would be hard to keep it a secret if you have your nursery done in pink!!
I understand with wanting to be prepared and have everything ready. I would assume that you have clothes from your 2 boys. So what if you have a girl and for the first couple days/weeks she's dressed in blue?? I'm sure you have some gender neutral stuff too. She can wear that when she's out in public til you fill your closet with pink. I swear, if it's a she...she will NOT be traumatized by having to wear blue a couple times!!
Bless you and good luck!

Hello! I've had three kids. The first one, a boy, I wanted to know and glad I did. I felt very close to my son throughout my pregnancy and am still very close to him now at 8 years old. My second, a daughter, I knew she was a girl, we found out and also am very close to her and with the pregnancy felt very close to her as well. With the third, I was told I was having a boy and have the pee pee sono to prove it. I did not want another boy and thought I was having a girl until the doctor told me I was having a boy. I did not feel close to this baby during pregnancy and was kind of resentful that I was going to have a boy. I already had my son and my husbands son (that I had raised since he was 10 mos. old) And with having one girl, I had wanted another one. When I went into labor and the baby came out the doctor said "its a girl". We were all shocked!!! My husband shouted, "yes, we're done!" and I was overly joyed that we had a GIRL!!!!!!!!! And she and I are VERY close....she is definately a mommas girl! So having a sono does not always guarantee the sex of the baby unless you have amnio and have it tested. Unless you have one of those new 3D sonos. Personally, I always wanted to know what it was so that I could bond with the baby better and get better prepared for when the baby arrived. I am very excited for you. Whatever you decide, enjoy every precious moment! They grow up too fast! Good Luck!

Hi A.,

My husband and I were on the fence as well. My sister-in-law said something to me that made us not want to know. There are some many things that we can control in our lives now. The sex of a baby is such a nice surprise. There aren't many surprises left in life. Especially if this is your last one.

Planning....I totally understand. It would be so much easier, but it's only 9 months.

As the mother of 2 boys myself, if we were to have a 3rd child I think it would help to know the gender beforehand not only for planning purposes but also to get used to the idea. If you are hoping for a girl this time (or a boy), then perhaps it may be easier to know in advance in case there are any feelings of disappointment. A friend of mine just had her 3rd boy and she did not know the gender beforehand for any of her births. She is unfortunately a little disappointed but still happy. In my opinion, it would just be easier to deal with all that ahead of time instead of when you are taking care of 3 children (1 being a newborn!). Not trying to assume anything about you but it seems like sometimes the people I've known who do not find out the gender beforehand want to hold out hope for a little longer on what the gender will actually be :-)

You have had surprises withthe first two - why not find out with the third? I personally loved knowing that we were going to have a boy. I loved talking to my son and calling him by his name when I was pregnant. Besides if you do happen to have a girl - what fun that would be to shop for the clothes and dolls! Maybe someone would throw you a girl shower. Anyway good luck and I wish you and your family the best.

I did not find out for either of my 2 pregnancies. I had a single birth and twins. For some reason even before I had children I had said we will probably have all girls.

It is a personal decision. I loved the surprise, but not everyone does. We did our rooms in neutral colors, and called it a day.

Good luck with your decision.

I didn't find out with either or my older 2 kids, nor will I find out for this one. So far, I've been right 2 out of 2 times (we have a boy and a girl). We've placed bets on this one. I'm saying it's a girl (as is my husband) and my in-laws are thinking another boy. Whoever wins, pays for dinner for the others.

I prefer not to find out. It's that "mystery" that keeps it exciting.

It is totally personal preference. I personally chose not to find out because I think it is one of the few or possibly only good surprise you have in life. I've only had one so I realize it would be easier for preparing with subsequent children. You will always get the pink or blue things when your child is here and as your child grows. Congrats!

From the moment I got pregnant, I knew I would want to know. And, we did find out. It eliminated a lot of stress for me because it was our first baby and we could decorate the nursery, pick out a name, have things personalized, and people could get gender-specific gifts if they wished. I had specific nursery designs for both a boy and a girl, and if you think you're going to paint/decorate a nursery after you bring home the baby (much less with two young boys around), well you're pretty brave and ambitious! I also had a completely crappy, stress-filled pregnancy complete with weekly visits to the doctor, so I wanted one less (well, many less) thing to worry about!

It mattered not to me if we were having a boy or a girl.

And, while some people say that finding out ruins "the surprise" nothing is more surprising or joyful than seeing the beautiful face of your baby moments after delivery. Finding out does NOT ruin the surprise. It's not like he came out of my birth canal and I remarked "Hmmm, looks like a boy to me. Guess I'll take a nap now".

I am the type of person who likes to have everything ready, so we've found out all three times. The first two were boys, and our little girl will be here in a few days. With this last one I am glad I found out because I was really hoping for a girl after the two boys- not to say I wouldn't have been happy with another boy, but I would have been a little disappointed. This way I had the chance to get used to the idea if it was a boy. I think it was more fun knowing because I could pick out gender specific outfits and things for the baby's room. We also have had names picked out before hand for all of them and at least with the boys they responded right away to their name because we talked to them all the time using their name while they were in utero.