Theoretical Disagreement with Hubs.. Does This Even Make Sense?!

You need to be researching car safety and performance and looking for "best in class" in family cars since you have a baby coming. What are you doing looking for "dream cars" when you need to be thinking practically? Something that will get good mileage, not be a gas suckhole, has a good reputation for not needing too much maintenance, and is newer than 2006 since you have the option.

Sorry, but the car you want (not need) would be a waste of that $14K and end up being a money pit.

While I agree that you should have a big say in the car you buy, be careful of the BMW with that many miles. My girlfriend LOVES bmw's however it seems everytime they hit 75000 miles everything starts to go. She just traded her X5 in with 6 months left of payments because she has had to put over 4,000 dollars worth of repairs into it in the last year and a half. She actually ended up with a GMC. Good luck!

I had a BMW and they are extremely high maintenace. Very expensive upkeep. Insurance is higher on them. Routine oil change - $80. There is a 100,000 mile service that costs over $1,000 and HAS to be done. Parts are insane. No one can work on them and they are extremely fragile. I blew the motor in mine and the motor was $6,000. The car was gotgeous but it was a huge drain on the budget.
BMWs are made to be sports cars and hug the road. Something about car and driver being one and being able to feel the road. You know what that translates to? a rough noisy ride. It felt like I was driving an old buckboard horse and buggy. Not a luxurious ride at all.
I love my Mazda. I bought an 08 Mazda 6 with 40,000 for $13,000. Still under warranty, low maintenance cost, excellent gas mileage. The ride is much smoother than the BMW.

EVERYTHING is more expensive about a luxury car--premium gas, oil changes, a muffler, etc. Not just "covered stuff."

I totally get why your feelings are hurt, but your husband is likely correct on this one. It definitely sucks that he kind of fell into his dream car & yours will need to wait a bit longer, but that's the smartest thing to do right now. I'm not saying you MUST get a Honda (after all, there are about a zillion different options out there), but it's a way better idea than a BMW.

Trust your husband on this. The BMW is much more expensive to fix than the Honda. If you have any type of repair which is out of your husband's league, can you say chaching!!!!!

I have had bosses and friends with BMW's. I used to want one too until I saw the hell they went through when it came to repair time. If they are anything like what they used to be back in the day, everything about the BMW is sealed off and unaccessible with your ordinary tools which is part of the reason they cost so darn much to repair.

Instead of being stuck in the mindset of a Honda or a BMW, why not check out Camry's or something else like that. FYI using premium on a car that can use regular is just wasting money. Newer cars are designed to be the best performance of the type of gas designed for the car (learned that from an uncle in the oil refining business). I loved my Mazda.

Your husband's answer might be due to the fact that he is pretty stressed about the situation, and has worries for the future--new baby, etc....

With a family, you will basically drive your car to death. Lots and lots of miles (short trips to all the places kids go) which just eat a car.

I had a discussion with my husband the last time we needed new vehicles. He got a brand new Toyota (he meets with clients and takes them out, etc....) that he says he will drive for at least 15 yrs or until it is dead....whichever comes first.

I got a used '96 Camry with lots of miles already for work and all the kid driving. NOT my dream car by any means. But it is reliable, inexpensive to drive and keeps us safe. But in 2 -3 yrs when we have all kids in college and I can work more, I am going to give / sell the Camry to one of the kids and go get my DREAM car.

It's a short term sacrifice for the long term good of our finances, our family and our marriage.

If I were you, I'd keep looking.

Did you ask him why?
Why can't I have a Bug? Because my husband, who does all our maintenace does not want to fix a Bug, VW's are too complicated and expensive.
Why does he have a Prius that he cannot fix? Because he puts 10,000 miles a month on it and it routinely gets 51-53 mpg.
It's a practicality issue. If you want a nicer car look into some of the nicer Toyotas or Hondas. Try a Lexus.
Sometimes what we want is just not practical, like that electric purple IROC Camaro on the corner screaming my name. HA in my dreams.

while BMWs are great cars - if you don't have the money to get them fixed, it's not the car for you.

I would look for another car - and not one that is more than 5 years old - that's my opinion though..

GOOD LUCK!!

It's probably that the maintenance costs, parts, and repair costs are more expensive. It could also be that he's brand loyal to Hondas? I don't know, I guess you'd have to talk to him about it more as to his reasoning.

He si not making any sense. He also does not realize that if he would agree to your hypothetical question, he could then go with you and look at other cars and you would be more open to them. Tit for tat. So now you have dug in your heels and are annoyed with him - I would be too. But, to be fair, BMW's are outrageously expensive to maintain. A friend had those tires that self repair but once you do that they have to replaced within so many miles and they were incredibly expensive. I would look a for a new American made car that the gas station down the street can repair. Do some online comparisons via Edmunds and the dealer websites or go look at some cars at the dealer. Your dream car may become a nightmare as soon as something happens to it.

It's probably the maintenance issue. Even with a warranty up to 100K, that'll get you what...2 years? Then what? A Honda will easily go 200K+ without huge issues. To say that a BMW is expensive to fix is an understatement. Not only are the parts and labor expensive, you can't just bring them to a local mechanic to get fixed. They're very complicated cars. My husband appraises auto damage and a lot of BMWs come out of minor accidents as total losses because the cost of fixing them (a million sensors in the bumpers, complicated airbags - important safety items) is more than the car is worth.

That said, we bought an Infiniti because a Maxima that was 1 year older and had more miles on it was actually more expensive, but as nice as the Infiniti is, it's no BMW. Any Nissan mechanic can fix up an Infiniti (same with Honda/Acura and Toyota/Lexus).

my answer is twofold: yes, he's right- the BMW will be a money pit.

BUT you are picking YOUR car & you should have final vote. & here's how hard-headed I am: when we sold our mini-van, I went without a vehicle for 3 months because I refused to purchase what my DH wanted to buy! 3 months without...simply so I could prove my point that if we were purchasing MY vehicle then I got to pick! He has his truck...& I still hate it, but that's his perogative. In our equal partnership, I was entitled to my choice.

& honestly, he wanted a car with comfort. I wanted a 4wd suv large enough to haul our big dogs without having to share a backseat with them. We also needed to be able to hit the river....which is "why" I insisted on 4wd. All of those years we owned a mini van, we had to park the van on top of the hill & ride with other family....got to be old.

In the end, we compromised. We bought an Explorer with the larger V6 & 4wd. So we have some gas economy & comfort, we have the larger cargo bay for the dogs, & I have my 4wd! Works perfect. & everytime he hitches up his boat to my suv.....I just kinda snicker....:)

& (sigh) the battle will begin anew next year....we're handing the Explorer over to our son, selling his beat-up suv to pay the taxes on our new vehicle - which again is MY pick. !!

This really doesn't have anything to do with the theoretical argument, but I've been rear-ended twice in my life and both times by BMW's. My neighbor has a BMW SUV and it is very new... and the roof of the car FELL IN on them - and nothing fell on top of the car... it just fell in one day - thankfully they were not injured! So I have a very poor opinion of BMW's - and their drivers based on the two that rear-ended me and people who have driven them that I have known in the past - I do like my neighbors though :-). The neighbors are trying to get rid of that thing (the roof was covered by warranty) and have already purchased a Toyota. :-) I have always driven Honda's or Nissan's and love them. I would look for a different car.

Miles are not the only consideration. I bought a Buick about 10 yrs ago and loved loved loved it. Until..... it was low miles 69,000 on a car over 10 yrs old so I and my male friends thought man good deal unfortunately it had not been driven enough and all the seals were dried out so after fixing the entire cooling system and power steering system and a bunch of other stuff most covered by warrenty but months of loaner cars and inconvenience it was all fixed. It was running great when I was rear ended and totaled the car.

Low miles on a car is NOT always a good thing.

Your confused because he happened to luck into his dream truck and you haven't. Is this some sort of competition? Your car is so much more expensive to maintain and repair than his. Does that mean you have to go without your car half the time because yours will cost twice twice as much to drive and maintain as his truck.?

I haven't examined the BMW warranty, but I worked for GM and administered GM's warranty and I know of no manufacturer whose warranty covers "any type of work that needs to be done". One of my dealers also had a Mercedes Franchise. Some how a customer's Mercedes got a broken head light. The dealer's cost on this head light(and its small windshield type wiper) was $700. AND it wasn't covered by the Mercedes warranty. The replace the headlight, parts and labor was over $1100.

I'm sure if you take the emotion out of this you will get a nice, relaible, practical car, and BMW won't be your choice.

If BMW were all that reliable and consumer friendly, they would be as plentiful as Mercedes. They're NOT.

BTW, I was a GM service Representitive. I had 5 pages of schools I went to on GM vehicles. Tell your husband his truck will run as well or better on regular than on Premium.

Good luck to you and yours.

It makes no sense to me -- maybe you should show your husband your post and have him answer it??

Since your husband didn't give you a reason for telling his wife "NO" while he said "YES" to himself for his own vehicle... I'd have a serious talk with him about his behavior, his demeanor and his disrespecting you and putting your needs under his own.

My sister's BMW is pretty much always in the shop. Regardless of warranty, are you ready to go days at a time without your car? If you want a good, solid, workhorse of a car, get the Accord (my husband drives a '98, well over 100K miles and it's still in good shape). In a million years, I wouldn't buy a Beemer. BUT, you're allowed to dream, so *theoretically* you win, you should be able to get the car you want. But in reality, HE wins.

I understand why you are disappointed. I would be disappointed, too. I would probably still go with the honda. 90,000 miles on a Honda is like 30,000 on any other car, so you have a lot of life left in it. The have excellent resale value because of the long motor life, that's why they are asking 14,000 for a 7 yr. old car.

Having said that, we got a 2006 Honda Civic last year with 69,000 for $10,000, so I would keep looking, because I think you can still get a better deal.

I seem to be in the minority here, and while I have an opinion about the reliability factor, the loss of use while being repaired (what a pain when you have a baby and car seat to deal with!), and the cost of repairs, what I think is that your husband has something else bothering him. NOT that the previous reasons wouldn't be sufficient all on their own, in my opinion.

My own husband (like myself) actually don't want a "fancy" car. Just don't. Would I drive one if the keys were handed to me by the car fairy? Sure. But I don't think I would be able to consciously choose to drive such an expensive vehicle without winning a megamillions lottery. I just cannot be that.. I don't know what the word is. Nothing against anyone who DOES, mind you. But for me/us, it just seems sort of haughty. It isn't my style. I'm a very "sensible" person, and an overly expensive car just FEELS wasteful to me. We have kids, and that comes with both added expenses and long term responsibilities. So I can ALWAYS find a better way to spend the extra $ that makes better sense for the long term.
My "dream" car, is probably a Mazda CX-9. They run about $37,000 for the model I'd want. But I will NEVER in this lifetime spend $37000 on a car. I just won't. I may be ABLE to at some point, but I WON'T. It's more of a principle thing to me. I can find a perfectly good car that does everything I need and it will be comfortable and get me where I need to go in plenty of style to fit my personality, for much much less. $10k less, easily.

So, while, again, I also have other reasons I would say no ---(maintenance/repair/reliability issues, plus resale issues?)-- I wonder if maybe your husband has a mental "thing" about high-end vehicles (the major brands: Mercedes, BMW, Jaguar, Lexus, etc)... it may be an "image" issue he has with it.

My dream car is a Mercedes but I would never own one during the child phase of my life. You will soon learn what a kid does to your car - and it's not pretty. Car you afford to get the inside detailed everytime your kid pukes, spills his drink etc. You may go into it thinking there will be no eating in the car, but in reality when you are super busy it's the only way to eat.

Why would you want your dream car for less than 5 years? When I get my Mercedees I hope to have it for a long time. You have plenty of time to get that dream car, and hopefully it will be a brand new BMW when you have the extra money and the freedom to drive it and keep it for a long time.

You can get a new car for 13,000.00. Look at crossovers like a Toyota Matrix. Enough storage for a stroller and work related stuff, plus you will have it for years before you would ever need to get it fixed. Those suckers run and run.

I also agree that BMW's are always needing to be fixed. We have had Euro cars and it got so annoying to always be bringing it in. Plus, you have to bring it to special places to get it fixed and it takes a week to order the parts as they are not as common. Then you are out a car for a week all the time. Sucks!

Take a deep breath and let it go :) Once your baby comes your only concern with your car will be reliabilty and enough space.