The Dreaded Piano Practice!

The right hand is usually the melody hand and the left usually accompanies the right. So the left hand is more difficult. Ask the teacher if she can help him to practice some fun and easy melodies for the left hand to help him get used to using the left and reading the music for the left. The left can be boring, so making it fun can help. Also he should play both hands seperate and then put them together when he has mastered the piece for each hand.

I agree with you that piano should be an enjoyable endeavor and good for you for not using punishment. However, rewards may not be the best option either, especially in this case. If you reward him for practicing, then he'll never want to do it, or anything else, unless there is something in it for him. Also, the true reward, a feeling of pride and accomplishment, will be lost. If you play the piano youself, maybe sit down with him when he practices and offer a little guidance and support. He may just need to get more comfortable with using the one hand before he's ready to add the second. Let him master these complicated tasks in his own time.

talk to the teacher about it (not in front of your son). the teacher has a different relationship with the child and can push it better than mom and dad. explain your dilemma and ask her advice. a teacher can say something like "i think you are a brilliant student and i'd love to teach you piano, but I need you practice every day" and it has nothing to do with tv or chores or anything else, the way it does when mom and dad try to push it. Also a small motivation-- a daily practice chart with stickers and prizes at the end of a successful week can be really helpful for some kids.

If he says it's too hard, validate it. Say "i know the left hand is really hard. we should ask your teacher to help you know how to make it easy." have him practice what he can do and feels successful doing. be sure your teacher knows that it's too hard for him--to the point of giving up altogether! there are SO MANY things to learn when beginning piano, so if this is too hard right now he can focus on something else for a month and come back to left hand when he gets other things mastered.

remember that positive attitude and encouragement are much better than forcing and negative stuff. praise him-- announce to dad and big sister at the dinner table that he practiced so well today!! and make a big deal out of it when he is successful.

good luck. i'm a piano teacher and i know how frustrating it can be!!! ...but i also know how rewarding and satisfying it is to really play the piano, so stick with it because it's worth it!

I my opinion, the best thing I feel for my kids is to let them try all KINDS of stuff at their ages, which are 5 and 6. As soon as they say they don't like something, I take them out. At their ages, they see something really exciting and want to try it. It doesn't mean that they're going to like it though. I would be more happy about him wanting to try it in the first place. I would let him stop the lessons and just let him know that if he ever decides to try again, he can do that. If you force him at ALL, he's instantly going to not like it. Like you said, it will become more of a chore. My daughter has tried dance, gymnastics, T Ball, and tumbling. Right now, she is only in the tumbling class. She decided the gymnastics was too much stuff that she didn't like, so we switched her to tumbling. If she decides she doesn't like tumbling, I will take her out. I don't worry about them "quitting" at this point. I just want her to try as many things as possible so she can see what she likes and is good at. Next spring, I will put her in swimming, she LOVES that, and then ask her if she wants to do T Ball again. I would like my kids to try EVERY sport so that they can pick and choose which ones are there favorite. But, if there's one they don't want to try, I definitely won't make them. I hope this helps. I just know that I watched my mom raise my two younger siblings from a second marriage, and if they tried something, she'd force them to stick with it. And guess what? Now they're in 6th and 9th grade and guess how many activities they're in???? NONE, they don't even want to TRY anything anymore!!

I used to teach piano, so I'll share a couple of my opinions.

1. 6 years old is sometimes a little young to start, and one of the main reasons is attention span. It's hard for a child that age to sit for 15 minutes at a time to do almost anything. It's also difficult for them to keep trying when their piano-playing skills aren't developed yet.

2. Having said that, many children DO learn to play the piano at an early age. So if he still shows an interest, if you can get him to practice 2-3 times a week, that'd be great! I do suggest, however, that he practice for 5-8 minutes in one sitting until he gets a year or two older. (I knew a piano teacher whose lessons were chock full of playing, because she assumed her students were only practicing once a week - right before they came to the lesson - if at all! LOL -- And if the children were determined to keep going, they kept learning!)

3. His attitude is probably the most important thing! If he's being punished for not practicing, this really won't work for very long. I'd try fewer practices for fewer minutes at a time: maybe try 5 minutes a day, three days a week for a couple of weeks, then gradually increase it to TWO 5-minute sessions one day a week, etc. -- the details of the schedule aren't as important as just backing off the current schedule and building up to more time. It's crucial that this is fun for him! Learning and enjoyment go hand in hand!

Good luck, and keep us posted!

It's VERY common for kids that age to want to try a variety of things and then once they try them, decide it's not for them and want to move on to the next thing. How long did you sign up for? Tell him -- we signed you up for 4 months of lessons because you asked for them. You need to finish what you started. When this session is done, you can decide to continue or try something else.

It's good to teach perseverance, but it's helpful if there's an end in sight. Especially at that age. My son is that age and he wants to try something new all the time. It's good to expose him to a variety of stuff but he also needs to finish one session (some things are 4 weeks, some are 3 months) once he starts. In most cases, when he wants to quit, I just remind him he can quit in 4 weeks or whatever is left of that session but he needs to keep up his part of the bargain and practice until then.

As for the TV being punishment or reward... IMO, if you take something away you are punishing. So I would see the 'no tv' thing as a punishment, not as a reward. However, if he's currently not allowed to watch TV then it would be a reward. Is there something he really wants? Like my son is always wanting some new lego set. A good reward is a sticker chart time thing... sticker everyday he practices without nagging. If it's filled at the end of the session, you buy him a lego set or video game or whatever is at the top of his I'm-saving-for-now list.

Hi A. - I had piano instruction for more than 10 years. I, too, didn't like the left hand because it was harder to read the musical notes on the scale. The left side has the darker sound and I didn't like that as well, either. And it gets harder when you combine both hands.

I would ask the teacher if he/she could provide some fun, upbeat pieces for the left hand only. Ask the teacher to play them for him first, then let him choose the one/ones he likes. Whenever he practices, let him play something he likes (either or both hands) and knows well first to warm up. Then practice the hard stuff and then end doing something fun. This always helped me. It does get monotonous, especially when you are learning scales and major/minor stuff. The other thing you might ask the teacher to try is to play a favorite song with both hands and then try and get him to understand how much richer a song is with the left hand added.

Encourage your son to sit at the piano sometimes just to mess around. If he views the piano as something just for forced practice, he's going to lose the fun aspect of it. Ask him to sit down and see if he can figure out the melody to his favorite songs by himself.

You might also show him websites for famous pianists like Cleveland-native Jim Brickman and Billy Joel. Let him hear their piano-only music and ask him if he would like to write to them. Jim Brickman is very nice and approachable and has several concerts coming up in Ohio. On his website, he talks about not liking to practice as a kid and wanting to play things his way. It might help him to hear that. Billy Joel is also a real musical advocate. (I met him in college at one of his lectures where he talks about the music business and his composing process. He also plays his songs and the classical pieces he's composed. He usually lets an audience member come up and play with him. It's pretty amazing.) Perhaps your son could write to them and ask for advice on the left hand or practicing or attend a concert. You can pay a bit extra to meet Jim Brickman after one of his concerts.

Good luck!

We have 6 children and the oldest 5 all took piano lessons, so I totally relate to practice battles! First, you have to be sure you care enough that he takes the lessons to be worth the battle. Then try making it fun for him - you sit down and say, OK, I know the left hand is harder so I'll do the left hand this time, then you have a turn. Or make him the "expert" - you know, Johnny, I was trying the left hand part and I keep missing this note - can you teach me how to do this?
Another option is to give him a choice - do you want to practice first or clean your room first? (Of course, it has to be a choice between two equally undesirable [to him] options!) You could try a reward chart - if you practice without complaining you get a star and 5 stars means we'll go to the park for an hour, or we'll make cookies together on the weekend. I try to make rewards special times with mom or dad rather than TV time or food rewards...you want relationships to grow! (baking cookies TOGETHER doesn't count as a food reward, IMO!) Once you're sure he understands what's required to get a star, don't nag - set the timer, let him practice, then if he was complaining, just say, "OK, your practice time is up. I'm sorry I can't give you a star today, but you can do better tomorrow." If he cries about not getting a star, remind him that HE chose how to do his practice, so if he wants a star, he'll need to choose differently next time. If he wants to try again the same day, I'd let him, but only one re-try the same day, and never nag or remind him of the stars because YOU want him to get one. (That's a hard one for moms!)
As far as the age thing, ours all started in Grade 2 except the second daughter, 4th child, who started in Kindergarten because she wanted to so badly. We had fewer practice battles with her than any - in fact, her sister, 8 years older complained because the younger one was playing "her" music! We just said, then I guess you'll have to practice harder to stay ahead of her! :) And yes, our boys did have to work harder on the dexterity, but they did much better on the days their attitude was good!
Anyway, that's my best advice after seeing 5 kids through - the good news is that all 5 still really enjoy music, 2 still love the piano, 3 took up other instruments after (or during) their mandatory 4 years of piano, and one of those 3 is coming back to the piano now. Child #6 has a learning disability so at 8 doesn't have the motor skills development necessary for piano lessons, but we're hoping it will come with time.

We have this same fight with my 8 yr. old daughter. I don't require her to practice for a set number of minutes per day, because then it becomes "see how much time I can waste." I tell her how many times she must play each song. Usually twice, if it has been awhile 3 times. That way she controls how long she sits on the bench. If she sits down and does it quickly without fighting and whining, she's up in 10 minutes or so, if not she'll sit there for 30-40 minutes. She must play them correctly and with "heart," but not perfectly, becuase she is practicing to get better. I remember practicing as a kid and hated it. My reasoning on this was that she can control how long this takes and it is all on her and her attitude. Good Luck.

I absolutely would say no TV until he practices. YOU HAVE to remind him over & over that the more he practices, the easier it gets. NO ONE gets to be a master without practice. There are MANY things people overcame to learn to do something. I would make sure he follows thru. You went to the time, money & effort to get the piano and pay for lessons. Practice is HIS part of the commitment.

If you have to, give it two months, three months, or whatever, but set a goal and DONT let him get out of it. Kids (and many adults too) are so quick to quit because they think it's hard. SO WHAT??? Lots of things in life are hard. The only way to become stronger or overcome is to DEAL WITH IT AND FACE IT HEAD ON!

6 year olds finger are not big enough to play. When my girl was 6 she wasnted to play to. The instructor told me this and took her at a later time. She did fine.

Welcome to the world of the dreaded "practice" daily routine. I realize some children start playing piano at 2 but that isn't the rule, rather the exception. At 5 or 6 most children will "want to take lessons" of all sorts and hound you into thinking it is what they want more than anything else in the world and then they decide it is "to hard", "boring", interfering with sports, etc.
Make a game of left hand usage. We did this. For half and an hour a day everything my daughter did had to be done left handed, we did the same. I was luckier than a lot of people I guess my dad was left handed but forced to use his right by teachers etc., when he was young so he could bat, bowl, etc., all left or right handed. The English pop groups were just starting to really catch on,
the "Beatles" "Stones" Dave Clark 5" and so all of us girls made a big thing out eating left handed at school.
We would all eat dinner left handed, do dishes left handed, whatever for half an hour a day. We even tried to write letters etc., that way. She found out it wasn't as hard as she thought and practice with the left hand being to hard was eliminated. It just got down to "I really don't want to practice" so we suspended lessons for a little while. When she went back about 6 months later she had to sign a contract with her dad and she was a lot more serious about it.
And suspending TV, video games, etc., until practice is done is not a punishment it is a consequence. IE there are consequences for everything you do or do not do that effects/affects others. The lessons cost money which means we have to do without something else as a family to provide them for you. To save the money to pay for the lessons if you do not do your practicing we all have wasted the money but still have to do without. By leaving off the television, not using the video games we are saving the money to cover the cost of the lessons.

As a mother who was a piano student for 12 years, and who had 6 children in dance for 20 years, I would just say that you should require your son to practice for the 15 min. a day and no TV until that and homework are finished.
I had to practice 30 min. a day, so I do not find 15 min. too much.
I think you should require this for a year, 6 months at the very least, before any decisions are made whether or not to continue.
TV should be a reward, and limiting it is the best thing you can do for a child.
You are paying money for piano lessons remember, so he has an obligation to follow through.
It is never too early to learn these important life lessons, and he will be the better for it.

You need to ask seriously: What is the Alternative? And for most kids it is Video Games and T.V., as well as many other worthless activities. I hate to see my child's eyes glued on the T.V. I know that his eyes are glued and his mind is deteriorating as brain cells go unused and become flabby. Being a Parent is not easy. And we do not always receive positive feedback immediately. I have often said that "Our reward is in Heaven." When your child has the emotional value of music in his life, and can appreciate the work of great artists, that is something that no amount of money can purchase. At this young age the mind is developing the electrical circuits for use later in life. Beginning early helps your child develop those circuits. A mind is like any other muscle, it develops from use, and often it develops more from hard use than weak use. That is life. I wish there was an easy way. I have looked for the easy way for many years. I have wanted so badly to give the easy way to my students as a gift. But the only gift I can give is a kind gesture and warm confidence and encouragement. Walt Whitman said that all he has to offer is a walking stick, encouragement, and the open road ahead. So, if it is a battle, then I hope that you continue your battle. You as the parent know what is best for your child. He is not yet capable of knowing what benefits him in the long run. It is your love and encouragement to overcome difficult problems that will see him through. Learning to play piano with both hands is difficult for the child. Finally, best of luck to you, and congratulations for being a parent willing to go through the effort and financial cost of providing music lessons to your lucky young boy.

The left hand is hard and from personal experience he probably isn't a lefty which makes it hard. How many lessons have you paid for? Tell him he must complete the contract and if he wants to take time off until the left hand doesn't hurt so bad then do it. My boys always wanted to play ball on a team till they seen how much hard work it was. It was hard on us to bwcause the schedules get all aout of wack. Well usually after the second or tird game thy wantedto quit especially if they weren't on a winning team. I would explain of course your not winners youy don't know how to play together. Most usually the other teams were together a couple of years. I would tell them if they complained too much that we would not alloe thm to play too because of the money involved. He's not to young to understand the piano costed money that you could have used buying something else and he should do the practise before Tv and after Homework if his school does homework that early. If he doesn't really want to practice at least his grades will improve doing homework first.

Hi A.,
As a piano teacher, I'll add my two cents' worth even though you have some great thoughts shared already. Don't let him quit! If it is a "too young" issue, resolve to get him back in it. I have NEVER heard anyone say they wish they had not taken lessons, but everyone says they wish they had not been allowed to stop.
The other point I would reiterate that someone else already shared is to make sure he is playing some music that is really fun for him. Communicate with the teacher and if you don't get a good response, find another. If kids can participate in something they enjoy, they're much more likely to keep at it.
Best of luck to you both.

With my younger piano students I used a sticker idea too. If my students practiced all week and passed their lesson (and piano teachers can tell if kids don't practice!) they got a sticker at their lesson. Three stickers in a row and they got to pick something out of my "fun bag". I went to a teacher outlet store (called Star Beacon) and got a bunch of little items - fun pencils, erasers, stickers, small toys etc. The kids were usually pretty disappointed if they didn't get a sticker for the week and most of the time they improved their practice time for the next lesson.

This could be something that you can do with your son (you give him the sticker after his lesson if he did well) or work it out with the teacher maybe.

You have a lot of good advice so far though.
Good luck!

when I was a kid I too hated to practice. (this will tell you how old i am) I was allowed to watch Three's Company if i practiced for 30 min 5 days a week. Yes, rewards work if it is something he really wants.

Hello Piano Lovers, I am another piano teacher chiming in here. Just wanted to say how nice it is that all of you parents are providing a music/piano learning opportunity to your young children. You will never regret it.

I have to agree that the music must be fun for them and they must have a good rapport with their teacher. Make sure that your piano teacher provides POSITIVE incentive at every lesson and makes a big deal out of every small success. Stickers, words of praise written on their music or whatever the incentive may be....they are all very important. Remember we are not just building little Mozarts here but really we are building self-esteem in general. This translates into success at the piano and other future endeavors as well....hope this helps.
Find easy piano arrangements of your favorites at http://www.adultpianolesson.com/blog

You have a lot of advice, and I haven't read through it all, but here's my 2 cents. :) I think 6 is a little young to start piano lessons, unless it's the Suzuki method or something. I personally will not take piano students younger than 8. Even then, it is completely normal to not want to practice. That's pretty much how it always is. They are excited at first, and then the novelty wears off and the reality of HAVING to practice sets in.

What I do with my students is that every day they practice their required time (for your son, 15 minutes) they get a sticker. At the end of the month they can go shopping at the "Music Store" where there are things like candy, small toys, small gift cards (like $2 to Dairy Queen), etc, and each is worth a different amount (small candies are worth 1 sticker, then some things are worth 2, 5, and 10). You could do this on your own at home (or talk to the teacher about starting something like this).

Another idea, I read the other day that if you reward for practicing (or for doing any other chore for that matter), you should do so randomly averaging 1 out of 10 times they practice. The kids don't know when they are going to get a reward, so they always do it as long as a reward shows up on average 1 out of 10 times (it has to be random though). It is like the pop quiz principle in school, when you read because you never know when there will be a quiz.

Good luck! I love music, and I'm so glad my Mom didn't let me quit when I wanted to! We all started in grade 2, and we had to stay in lessons until at least grade 8. By the time I was allowed to quit, I didn't want to!

My Step mother is a piano teacher at a private grade school. I have two sons that I have asked her about signing up. She always told me that Until (especially boys) they are 8, a child really isn't ready for piano lessons. She said that the part of coordination needed for piano lessons is not fully developed. Especially the eye hand coordination. If he doesn't want to practice, and you really want him to become a good pianist, then let him quit the lessons now. If you force him to do it, he will start to hate it and then he will never want to do it again. It isn't his fault that he wasn't ready.

Hi A.,
My 7 year old and 5 year old also take piano. They have been in lessons for a little over a year now. We have had challenges with both during that past year. The left hand was also difficult for my daughter and skips were tough for her as well. My son went through a time (in the summer) where he didnt want to practice at all because he didnt want to stop whatever he was doing to play the piano. We battled and battled. Finally we talked to their teachers and explained the struggles were having. They told us to not argue with them. Tell them its time to practice and if they throw a fit or they do not want to do it correctly, then they do not get a sticker (our kids get a sticker for every practice and must have 5 stickers by the time they go to lesson. After 5 weeks of perfect stickers they get rewarded by the school). Then we let the teachers handle the lack of stickers. Our kids have become so attached to their piano teachers that its a greater punishment to them if the teachers are disappointed in them then if we fuss and fight with them. All I have to say now is "Do I need to have a talk with your teacher about your lack of effort"... they jump right on it. I would talk to his teacher and ask him/her to get involved in helping with the encouragement. Stick with it though, I really do see improvements with both my kids as they have gotten better and more fluent with their playing.