I think that one of my friends just broke up with me today. We met in the mothers' room at work several months ago, pumping for our babies. We learned that we live in the same part of town, so I've taken her home three times, the most recent being yesterday. She came out to dinner with me and some girlfriends earlier in the year, to celebrate my birthday. We call or text each other to meet at the mothers' room, to help keep each other on schedule. She would sometimes send me a message over the weekend, just touching base or wishing me a good day. It wasn't one of those talking-all-the-time kind of things. We weren't "besties", but we enjoyed each other and expressed that sentiment to each other.
This morning I missed a text from her. When I saw it, I was on my way to pump. I replied that I was just seeing the message and on my way. She replied that she was in a different room (because that oen had been full) and that she can't text me anymore. I said, "Ever?" kinda joking. I had assumed that she meant that her hands were full and I'd have to wait for a response. She said, "Ever." And that was it. I have since sent her an e-mail to ask if she was serious about the ever part, and I have not heard back.
I just got dumped, and I don't know why. Isn't that weird?
ETA: Thanks. I don't think that anything happened. Maybe she just realized that she doesn't clique with me like she was hoping to. That can happen. It just seems kind of sudden. We work in a big place, and speaking in person is not as easy as it sounds. In fact, I don't know where her office is. Also, I think that texts and emails and ignored phone calls convey a message just fine. If she wanted to say more, she would. I'm not gonna trek to her office (wherever that is) and hold a boom box outside her window. In person would be nice, but I won't demand that of her. We were not lovers, and there is no real history. I don't think that it's been quite a year.
Michelle R.--I was thinking that maybe she hadn't seen the email. It's just weird that I haven't heard anything yet. I won't be making any grand gestures or telling her to kiss off. I'll just back off and let her decide if and when....
For those who say that I've got a good attitude, I am one of those it-is-what-it-is people. I get that not everybody is gonna be a life-long comrade. Not everyone will like me or think I'm pretty (lol). So far, I'm not even hurt, just feeling kinda blind-sided and disappointed. I'd probably be hurt if she meanly spelled out all the things that she disliked about me. It's rare that I connect with a woman like that and have honest and open conversation that does not revolve around shoes and make-up. She is a person who didn't mind saying, "I like that about you." No competition between us, you know? It was nice.
I talked with her on the following Tuesday. It turns out that she had been kidding and then I missed her subsequent calls. I knew that it was odd not to have heard from her. She was super busy at work and couldn't respond to my e-mail. 'Tis the season!
SHe's gotta be joking back right? I mean it sounds like something I would say in jest knowing that you were joking. Maybe she just hasn't seen the email yet.
Yeah totally weird. I'm glad you seem to be okay about it though, you don't seem to be taking it too personally, which I totally would be, so good for you! ;)
I will say though that I think there has to be more to her story. Possibly she has an overbearing husband and is not allowed to have friends! j/k...kind of, I do watch too much Lifetime! ;)
I suggest that you not rely on a text message. Talk with her in person.
It is weird. I hope it was a joke and all works out.
Now I am going to wonder all weekend why yr work buddy sent you that weird break up text! My life is boring............ :)
Maybe she just meant she could not communicate via text anymore because her cell phone bill maybe exspensive.
Added: if you enjoyed her company it maybe worth looking into a little further.
Yes, that is weird.
I don't think I would track her down or text her to follow up any further. But I would maybe try to stick to the same schedule you had and perhaps you will see her in the mother's room and get a chance to find out what happened.
Maybe she did get in trouble for texting at work, and she doesn't want you texting her anymore for that reason.
Or maybe she has some super paranoid husband that thinks she's cheating b/c of the texts.
Who knows. It is weird, though.
If you DO see her, you could always ask her "did we just not clique? Because it's ok if that is the case, but if I DID something, please tell me because I am confused about what happened..."
Or not.
Totally weird.
Ok I"m going to feel really bad if you do lose your friend but your post totally had me cracking up, John Cusack!
I totally have a sense of humor that would text somethign like this, a pouty but not serious " i'm nevera gonna talk to you again" and your cute reply and then if i was still pouty I would respond with a Never ever. but i wouldn't really mean it.
I think if she were never going to text you again, she would have said something stronger ( ie i'm sick of you standing me up you B " or more direct or just never answered you again.
I would totally laugh it off as you have been, and then on monday or when ever you would usually talk to her try again. if she still doesn't answer or whatever then assume it's done
Is there any chance another person that she might ahve run into in the other room, could have said something and talked bad about you??
If you don't have any enemies and you haven't done anything wrong then I think you'll patch up what was just a joke that might have had a smidge of hurt or bad day taking it out on you behind it.,
lol maybe you really can make her a mixed tape and she'll forgive you.
Wierd. Either something happened or she's a little off her rocker... She may have gotten in trouble at work for texting. I would catch up with her in person and find out what's going on.
Ask her something light hearted "did you get in trouble for texting me too much at work or is your work husband jealous?" Maybe she's having phone problems? maybe she's texting a zillion other people as well and it's too much?
and Please, if you change your mind and stand outside her cubicle with a boom box, we NEED to hear all about it! Wouldnt be as dramatic with an iPod mini would it?
Wow, very weird, indeed! Just let her simmer down over the weekend and, if you are interested in still being her friend, text her Monday morning for your usual pump-date :) TGIF!
Very weird. Did something happen yesterday when you took her home?
Just a thought, that sometimes it is good to know. I think I would send one more email or something that said what you just said. "I was enjoying our friendship and feel hurt and dissappointed. If there is something I did or said I am unaware of it? Please let me know." I respect your decision but would like to know so that I do not do whatever it was again if possible.
Weird and juvenile.
I have a similar story, several years ago, a good, close friend, we were friends for years and she really helped me a lot, and thought I was also help and good company for her one day she decided we could not be friends anymore, I did not know why and she just said we could not and that was it.... No fight, no discussion, actually nothing happened before not even remotely uncomfortable, just we are not fiends anymore. I was very confused, hurt and sad.
Years later, I got a husband and two kids and she contacts me and wants to hang out again. Since she was a really good person to me and I have things to be grateful to her I did nt think twice and started hanging out again, but now I do not have all that free time, after being very close again and even having her over at Christmas etc, one day after several not answered phone calls, she answers the phone and tells me that she is busy.... I told her I that she could count on me and to call me if I could be of help ....l never to hear from her again..... This time I am busy with my own life and I know it was not me or anything I couldvhave
say or done cuz I am 100% sure I did nothing .... It is just her own issues and there is nothing I can do.... This time I was not hurt or sad, and if she calls again.... I will hang out with her again until the next "break up" :)
she might have had to adjust her cell service, one of my girlfriends just had to.
Why don't you just walk over to her desk and ask her in person? If she really wanted to "break up" with you, why would she have texted this morning to remind you to pump? That doesn't make any sense to me. If she was feeling you didn't really click any longer, I think she would have just stopped contacting you. I hope you get it figured out. Good luck.
Odd, for sure. I might assume 1 of 2 things:
1. It is a text/phone service issue
Or
2. For some reason, she wants "out" of the friendship and at least had the decency to let you know. I could at least respect that honesty, right? Instead of making excuses, etc....
That is weird. I've been on the other side where I realize we don't click and I want to end a friendship but don't have the guts to do it. You've got a great attitude about it though, even though it's weird :P
It's possible that she just can't text any more. My brother and his wife have cell phone service and texting only because of my sister-in-law's job, so they have to be careful about not going over their minutes and texts during peak hours. My SIL can't text or call anyone unless she's on a break or off duty and she has to log her hours and turn them in. If she gets the logs and phone records audited and she was on the cell phone at all during work hours and didn't log a break or that she was off work, she gets penalized.
Just a thought.
I would have texted back LOL! Because that's what it sounds like to me.
L.
