Breastmilk is most nutritious the less it is "processed." Therefore the best way to get it is through the breast. If you cant do that, then you can refrigerate the milk for up to 7 days. Frozen breast milk can be kept up to 3-4 months. Once the milk is thawed, however, it should be used within 24 hours. You cannot re-freeze breastmilk.
I would recommend pumping and giving the milk that you pumped the day before to your son the next day. Use your frozen supply as "emergency." Every once in a while, I would throw in a frozen bag just so you can keep your frozen stash "current" so it won't go bad.
Let's take a stab at your "questions"
1. I would not store that much breast milk in one bag. I stored mine in 3 ounce bags. That way, I could unthaw 2 bags, and if my son drank it all and seemed still hungry, I could unthaw the third. (he hardly ever drank more than 6 ounces). More commonly, he'd drink about 5 ounces and I'd be left over one ounce. My lactation consultant said that at the next feeding I could just give him the leftover. She explained that breast milk resists spoilage much more than formula. Fresh breast milk can be stored at room temperature for 4 hours, in the refrigerator for 7 days, and in the freezer for 3-4 months. Unused breastmilk can be given at the next feeding, but should be thrown away after that. Frozen breastmilk will keep up to 24 hours in the fridge. Your caregiver can unthaw the whole bag and give it to the baby as long as he drinks it within 24 hours.
2. I wouldn't thaw it for her. It takes only about 3 minutes to thaw it under hot running water, and what if she doesn't use it all. It would be a waste. But it keeps for 24 hours once thawed.
3. My son was the same way. He never drank more than 6 ounces and was done after 5. He is a fatty. Don't worry, he is getting enough.
4. I think that it should be fine to rinse and scrub, but honestly, I don't know for sure, and I don't want to give you information that I am not sure is accurate. But based on what I know about breast milk and spoilage, I wouldn't think twice about doing that for my son.
You will be fine at work. The first 3 months for me were hell, and my son was 11 months and weaned, drinking out of a cup. But now it is much better. Try not to stress out too much, remember to take it easy, and try to keep the guilt down. You giving him the breast milk is the best gift you could give! It will all be fine, I promise!