Teenagers and Summer

I wish my 14 yr old would be active and have friends over and maybe run around (a lil bit) but he's a slug! Doesn't do a dang thang other than what I make him do. But I get to sleep in so im ok with it! Well most of the time!

My son will be 15 in a week.

What he will do this summer:
Alternate between staying home and volunteering at our Vets office. We have not set up the schedule yet, but I am thinking 3 days a week at the Vets, 2 days home. He has band camp for one week in July. He may go spend at week with my Aunt. Also, his Dad has more time off right now, so he may spend more time with him this summer also.

Bedtime: Unless we have something specific to do in the morning I let him stay up. What I have found is he usually does not make it past 1 before he voluntarily goes to bed.

I will not let him hang around outside after 10pm or after I have gone to bed - whichever comes first. This is really a none issue for us unless he has friends spend the night.

I do wake him up in the morning - if he sleeps all day, he is up all night, and he gets no chores or anything done. Then I get angry, a large hassle ensues, and we are both miserable. :)

We do have friends over on and off during the summer. But only one can stay the night at a time. I will not leave teen boys alone in my house - I don't want that responsibility for other people's children.

Starting with his birthday next week, we usually average one sleep over per week during the summer. (My house is fairly popular with his friends).

You need to decide what you want your summer schedule to be, and then tell your child(ren). Set boundaries and expectations. Stay a little flexible - after all, it is summer. But, I don't let mine get too far off track because summer flies by, and I don't want to have major adjustments hassles when the school year starts again.

I will also set up a schedule for him to practice music, and make him read a few books to keep at least part of "school" brain awake during the summer.

Have a wonderful summer!

God Bless

Mine are 13 and 16.
The 13 yo is volunteering at an art camp, then youth group camp, then fencing camp. All summer she in on the swim team.
My 16 yo will start volunteering somewhere, she hasn't decided yet. She is also on the swim team and a Maine missions trip with church.
We tend to keep our kids close. When we take vacations they alwasy come with us. Hopefully we'll be able to go home sometime this summer too.

Here in Austin there is a city wide curfew for kids 17 and under. So they cannot be out and about on their own after curfew.

In the past, our daughter volunteered at a summer camp at an elementary school each summer. She was there from 9 am to 3 pm, for about 5 weeks.

Then I would let her sleep in. She never has had set chores, we all just do what needs to be done around our home.

She accepted any babysitting, pet sitting and house sitting that she was offered. She also mentored/tutored one little girl one summer.

I do special events, so I also offered her jobs. I pay well so she usually always accepted the jobs.

When she and friends went out it was to the movies, parks, swimming shopping.. Or they would meet up at someones house and watch movies, play board games.

She also LOVES cooking. So I would let her make up menus and cook at least 2 times a week.

She loves to read so there were lots of trips to the half price books and dozens of books read each summer.

She is now in college and actually is working as a paid Intern at a local Charity. It is a good match for her. She is required to work 220 hours this summer. They have her doing all sorts of things all day long. She is enjoying it, but she is exhausted when she gets home..

I have a 13 y/o son. He will be attending educational camp for 3 weeks (reading/writing and public speaking). Then I am traveling with my boys internationally to Europe for 3 weeks to visit relatives/friends so the kids can brush up on their language skills and connect to family overseas. The time there is very busy, usually full of fun and food, family gatherings and sightseeing. The rest of the summer I invited my niece and my nephew over so they can brush up on their English and we all can have family fun at the pool, going to the ocean, sightseeing, etc.
I also plan time for my son to study (he will be taking SSAT in November) so I will design a study plan for summer that we will follow (an hour a day, 3-4 times a week). When my niece and nephew will be over they will also do scheduled study of English language (flash cards/ phrases).
At night I have a 10 pm curfew for the older one when my husband is home (he supervises because I fall asleep with my younger one at around 8:30 and my husband is watching TV or eating late). When my husband is traveling, everyone is in bed between 8:30-9 pm. Teenager complains, but I am unbendable on this issue because I cannot sleep if he is not in bed and if he stays late it interferes with my schedule. We had many clashes about it but now he is used to it. I take the computer into my room so there is no temptation to use it. In the past I went so far as turning off the power to house (after he was caught watching TV at night).
Yes, I wake my teenager up in the morning around 8:30-9 am, usually he is awake before that from all the ruckus his 4 y/o brother makes in the morning (when he has classes he is up at 7 am and he wakes up from his own alarm clock).
My son does not usually bring friends over. He is allowed to go to friends' houses but he has to carry his phone and check with us occasionally. If he is not answering the phone or coming back from his friends and displays some nasty attitude - he is not allowed to go there for a while. Right now he is grounded until the end of the school year with the sleepovers for some bad behavior on the last outing that was about a month ago.
My son does not have any specific chores, usually I ask when I need help and we cook together a lot. He helps me with shopping, cutting grass, garden, cleaning as needed, watching his brother (not a lot because he is not a very patient person with a little guy).
I suggest you make up a schedule of all the things you plan to do and then see where your teenager has pockets of free time and discuss how he/she plans to spend it and stick to it.
Have a wonderful summer!

My kids are still young, but one thing my mom did that was clever was have a rule that you couldn't have breakfast after 9:30 am. If we wanted to eat before lunchtime, we HAD to be up (dressed & bed made) by 9:15.

My other suggestion would be to keep your teen busy with activities, volunteering or work. I always had swim team practice, a regular baby-sitting job or a real job, so I had to learn to get to bed at a decent hour, regardless of a curfew. My curfew was later on the wknds, but I had an early curfew during the week (10pm), out of respect for my parents' sleep schedules.

Good luck, and have a good summer!

I have a 16 yr old girl. She is going to chill out because she has a very tough schedule.

Her summer days, not all, will be with her cheer squad training and preparing for the upcoming season. She also babysits for a couple of families on the street.

She has tried her hardest to get a summer job but most people don't hire 16 yr olds. She was approached by Hollister and Abercrombie to model (sell) but she does not meet their age restrictions. This will be her last summer before she is able to get one of those jobs.

Yes, she will socialize at night, that is what teens do. Our town has a curfew which helps me because it is 11pm Sun-Thurs and midnight on Fri-Sat. She knows the rules, she has always been a good kid and she has a lot of freedom until she gives us reason to take it away.

I have a 16 year old who stays home while i work. In years past she has gone to horse camp for two weeks and took tennis lessons when she was home. Last year camp was 4 weeks. She had to be up and had to walk to the park for tennis twice a week. My parents live close and will ocassionally pick her up and go do something. She has chores, more over the summer that she must do. I do allow her to have friends over but they leave at a reasonable hour. She does have friends sleepover. I do not make her go to bed at any certain time but she does know she can't sleep all day. This year she has tennis twice a week and we have found a way to get her to the barn to work off her lessons and she has a part time job within walking distance of our house. I have found busy hands are happy hands and they stay out of trouble.......well hopefully. lol So happy summer and hope this helps.

I don't have one but I remember being one lol. I was allowed to stay out at night, my parents went to bed at 10 so I would get home after they were asleep. Me and my best friend had sleep overs all the time, mostly at my house cuz her house was so dramatic and so much fighting with her mom all the time. When I was 14 I'd go to the beach a lot with friends that could drive. When I could drive we would go to movies, the beach, have sleep overs, just hang out. I had a phone and they would call me to check up sometimes but were pretty lax. They didn't schedule my summer or anything, they let me decide my own life/summer... outside of going to the nightclub (they had teen nights) and they didn't let me go downtown at night but that was because they wanted me alive, not shot.

My children - one is off to college this summer and the other is entering her Junior year - usually go to music camps or volunteer at camps for disabled kids during the summer months. Normally they aren't home enough to want to stay up or out all night.
We live in the sticks. Everything is far so staying out means staying out with the bears and the wildlife. My kids like to hang out with each other and us. We watch movies. We make popcorn or cookies. We talk and laugh and play games. We go to the movies once in a while. They have friends over sometimes. They don't often want to sleep over at anyone else's.
Basically, though, they are really really busy.
This summer my oldest heads to summer session at college on July 5. My youngest heads out to music camp on July 14.
She arrives home August 1.
He arrives home July 29th.
She goes out to band camp on August 8.
He has to be back at college on August 19th.
Again -- there is very little time to get into trouble.
When they are home, they are preparing to leave for the next thing... We have movies to see with friends -- Harry Potter is coming out, so we have to make plans for that. They also need some down time. I let them sleep some mornings and other mornings we have dentist or doc appointments -- I can only schedule them when they are home... We've got a lot of college shopping to do this summer, so we'll be doing some of that as well. If they are tired, I try to let them sleep -- heck I want to sleep, too.
Friends -- whenever they want to have them over during the summer is fine with me. We've got a pool, so we have the party house -- it's all good.
YMMV
LBC

I have 3 teenaged sons: 19, 17, 15. We keep them busy in the summer working on projects, playing (as a family- we are taking a 3 week vacation), having friends over (we usually have whole families over), hiking, etc. Their bedtime schedule is relaxed. Yes, they have to get up in the morning, but maybe not quite as early as normal. They don't go hang out at night, but they might be together at a trusted friend's house with other friends. We don't really have a curfew because we know where they are and who they are with. Keep in mind that we homeschool, and their friends are all homeschooled. Not that that guarantees anything, but we are friends with all of their friends and their families. They don't "party" in the traditional sense, but they do have fun with their friends. I hope that makes sense. I didn't grow up this way, so I totally understand how odd this might sound. :)

Now they are almost 21-son and almost 17-daughter.
Good questions and to be honest, I hadn't even really given it much thought. I guess over the years the rules and expectations just evolved.

Every family is different, but I don't care how late they stay up. I will wake them up at noon though if I haven't seen them! I've never really MADE them do things, but there was always something to do. Both kids always had a summer packet (math, vocabulary, science) and required reading from the school that they had to do at some point. And yes, being typical kids they were usually doing it the last 2 weeks before school! ;) Except our daughter, the almost 17 year old, loves to read so summer reading isn't an issue.

Son-started working fairly early packing books in boxes at a warehouse and was responsible for mowing the lawn.
He was always the one who wanted to have the buds over. And I ALWAYS said yes! My DH didn't understand at first until I explained that I knew where they were and what they were doing. I'm usually fairly picky about the food we eat, but would have soda and snacks so they were here. *We also have a pool table that was given to us and a ping-pong top I bought at a garage sale for $10. So we had the entertainment too.
The didn't go wondering the 'hood. Never asked.
Even now, (he's back home this summer for a job) he knows I don't sleep well until he's in, so even though he is used to having complete freedom, he's in by midnight. In high school I made him come in and kiss me goodnight when he got in. That way 1) I knew he was in and 2) could smell his breath! ;) He now has my trust and I don't make him do that.

Daughter-actually played softball (rec and club) the last 5 summers? So she was busy. This summer though she is working as a teachers-aid at a local summer school program by her choice.
Even though she had a lot of friends, she usually just hangs out with her one best friend. Now she and her friend will want to go outside and walk or sit outside and talk, but I trust them. *The 2 peas in a pod used to be the 3 Amigos but the 3rd girl they 'dumped' because she was making poor choices. My husband and I as well as the best friend's parents have talked at great lengths with these 2 and feel confident they are not doing anything stupid. Number one they are both athletes and have college and career plans. So that's why I feel comfortable with them outside. Plus, where we live, it's almost rural. We are in a neighborhood, but it's not like you can just walk a block to the Quick Trip and hang out!
I will admit to being a little more neurotic with our daughter and have her check in more often if she's not home. Our son is built like an NFL linebacker and is a bouncer at a bar on the weekends. Compared to our cute, petite daughter.

Did that help at all? I guess I felt I needed to explain more since they kids are so different.

We have a sixteen, almost seventeen year old boy in our house.

If he's not working his volunteer job the next day, we let him stay up as long as he wants and sleep in the next day. He's only young once and now is the time to enjoy it!

He is not allowed outside after 11 pm. Roaming packs of teenaged boys out that late is a roaming pack of teenaged boys looking for trouble and our son is not to be a part of that. If he were driving, we might change that, under certain circumstances.

He doesn't have many friends over. Most of his elementary/neighborhood friends ditched him in middle school so he doesn't have a whole lot of friends who live nearby. It makes me a little sad, as he'd already felt like a bit of an outsider because he's not "normal' due to his little sister being developmentally disabled.

Girls - ages 14 and 16. One week is spent on a family vacation. We may also take a long weekend or two.

Up until this year my girls would spend about 3 or 4 weeks at summer day camp, at age 13 they start a leadership training program. The oldest ocassionally spent a week or two at overnight camp. Since they need to get up early for camp, bed time was 10:00. On rare occassions a friend would spend the night during the week of camp, and we would take her home early morning.

Weekends I wanted them in bed by midnight. They occassionally would have friends spend the night. They were allowed to be outside in our yard. They would usually prefer to come inside and watch a movie.

During the day when they are home and we're working there are certain friends that are allowed over. A few of their friends parents don't work, or work part time so they often arrange to go to a movie or shopping. They are allowed to walk to the local park, but they need to call us and let us know first. There's a McDonald's and a pizza place within walking distance, so they may decide to meet some friends for lunch. We try to make sure they have some parental supervision, us parents all work together to try to keep the kids entertained.

There's a small amusement park about 20 minutes away. In the past we have bought season tickets and the girls will go with a group of friends or tag along with a friend's family.

This year the annual girl scout trip was planned before school let out, but in the past it's been 4 days during the summer.

The week before school starts is a 3 day band camp, which is held at the school.

Some how it always seems to be over so fast.

This summer my oldest is working at an overnight camp for 7 weeks. I'm going to miss her.....

Have a great summer!