Stay-At-Home Dads - Richton Park,IL

Do the things for him you would like to have him do for you if your jobs were reversed.

When you come home, take the kids for awhile.
Give him a night with the guys so he can get out.
Get a sitter and have date night.
Ask him if you can bring something home on the way home.

Talk to him about finding a hobby he can share with the kids.

My husband has been an amazing SAHD for the last two years. It was tough at first, but now I can't imagine anyone else being home with my daughter. The one thing that probably helps the most with the isolation a dad may feel as a SAHD was his participating in a Chicago SAHD's group. See http://www.chicagodads.com/groups/chicagodads for more info (I believe they have specific groups for various Chicago suburbs too). My husband goes to weekly playgroups and "Dad's Night Out" once a month. Through this group, my husband has made some great connections with other local SAHDs. They end up doing regular play dates, trips to the zoo and classes together as well.

See if your local Moms' Group has a Dads' component. Not all of them do, but there is an enrichment center in my area that offers a SAHD's Day Out once a week so that the dads can get together and socialize without, as they say, SAHMs looking at them suspiciously when they come in to the center. ^_^ Also, see if your local health club or Parks & Rec offers playtime for kids at a local gym or park, and check out your public library's story-time options. These are things that, as a SAHM, I really need just to get me out of the house sometimes. Good luck!

My husband was out of work for a little, so he was home with the kids. What helped a lot was for me to come up with a list of fun stuff to do with the kids (playgrounds, indoor playgrounds, open times at the Y, etc) and then help him plan out how he was going to spend his week. I impressed that it's very important to get out of the house at least once per day, even if it's just to go to the grocery store. I think that men just aren't always very good at that kind of logisitical stuff (what time do you have to leave to get home for nap, etc). Honestly, he didn't have a lot of playdates with other parents, but I think it worked out ok anyway. Of course, if he needed to go out for a little while after I got home from work, I understood that too. Good luck!

If your hubby is looking for ideas on things to do with the kids, have him check out www.kidwinks.com. The Events Calendar details fun kids events throughout the Chicago area; the Ongoing Activities section is great to click through to find ideas for Indoor or Outdoor, etc.; the Restaurant Section has a fabulous Kids Eat Free Calendar, so if he wants to take them out to eat, he just needs to click on any day of that calendar to find out where the kids can eat free (or cheaply) that day. Membership in kidwinks is free, and once you become a member you can sort search results by distance from your house - a very handy feature since the site has listings from all over the Chicagoland area. Also, members can participate in frequent contests to win free tickets to shows, events, and even overnight hotel stays. There are also lots of seasonal and topical guides on kidwinks, so if you're looking for a great place to hold a birthday party, or summer fun, fall fun, etc., it's easy to find.

My SO is about to be a SAHD and I already researched schools that offer part-time care =)

Our DD has been going to school for almost 2 years now and I know she's going to get bored and drive him crazy. And I know he doesn't know what he's getting himself into especially with our second coming in 3 months! Anyhow, I found a great spanish-immersion school ( he is teaching our DD some spanish already so I figure he would be more open to this idea) that offers one day a week for about $50 a day. I told him this would give him some time to himself if and when he needed it =) He said he would think about it... I give him a month =)

I have no info on your question, sorry :-)...but It is SO great to see so many dads stepping up to the plate. As a working mom I love it! Quality time with dad (not just play time, but the hard stuff too) is so imporant and has really been negected for too long. For some reason, everyone things that only moms can do that. YAY to all the awesome dads.

I would suggest that you join a gym with child care ASAP if you haven't already. He can work out, which will improve his mood, and someone else can help care for the kids for a while, which will give him a break at the same time. We know several SAHDs but their kids are all in school full time now. They embraced the job for all it was, got to know all their kids' friends, and are really involved in school and extracurricular activities. Good luck!

Hi!

I'm a SAHM and go through the same type of feelings regarding cabin fever and keeping an interactive home life with my kids.

One of the answers below mentioned the workout facility w/childcare. That is a GREAT way to help both parties get a little alone time. Another way to do that is check into your local churches which often offer a Parent Day Out program...for a small fee they watch, play, and often feed your child a snack while you get a few hours to run errands or just recoup from a long week.

One thing I found most helpful in my life is to take every sunday afternoon (well I try every Sunday at least) to go out by myself to my fav coffee house and plan the week ahead. If I know what is coming up it doesn't seem like cabin fever anymore. I have a plan of attack and that helpf the kids as well...not to mention I get a little time to enjoy a cup of joe w/o it getting cold!!

Best of luck to him - It's not an easy job!

Court

My husband got stuck doing it this summer because he was out of work. He had good days and bad days. He would do things like the park, the pool, bowling, we'd meet for lunch. I always went home for lunch. Today is actually the first day I am not and it's so I can meet him and our three year old at the bus to get the 5 and 7 year old off :). So just anything to run the kids ragged so they will nap and he can rest or do something off the Honey Do list!

Hi,

My husband has been a stay at home dad for now 3 years (our daughter just turned 3) and he is a great father. We do try to plan activities during the week and our daughter is typically signed up for at least 1 or 2 classes a week (gymnastics, music, art) which helps. He has his days, which I think would be the same if the roles were reversed, but he does best when they are busy. My husband has also gone back to school (takes classes when I can be home from work) and I think that has helped him as well. We are expecting baby number 2 soon and I know he is a bit concerned about handling it all, but I know he'll do a great job. Hope this helps.

My husband was a stay at home dad for a while but he absolutely couldn't handle it. It just wasn't in his nature to take care of a screaming baby all day. Once he started working out though it helped a LOT to relieve stress.

My husband is a stay-at-home dad for our 4 1/2 year old son and he really loves it. I also love the close bond he has with our son. He is a designer so is still able to take on certain projects and work from home (but mainly in the late evenings when our son is sleeping). For my husband, being able to work (though on a limited basis), works well for him and keeps him tapped into his work community.

To avoid cabin fever, he is big on taking our son to museums regularly, the library, parks, the zoo and setting up play dates. It's helpful to invest in museum or zoo memberships or take advantage of free days. When school is in session, he often volunteers in my son's classroom too. There are a number of stay-at-home dads in our neighborhood which is nice but he has as many stay-at-home mom friends at the park too. I've become good friends with a number of moms in our neighborhood through the introduction of my husband!

Our child care situation works well for our family but I realize that it doesn't work for everyone. My friend's husband didn't like staying home with their daughter at all. He always kept busy with activities but he just wasn't happy taking on the role of a stay-at-home dad.

Good luck!

Hi C.F. I know that there are some "dad's groups" out there for stay at home dads. They are structured the same way "mom's groups" are: meet at the park for a playdate etc. Definitely worth looking into if I were him. I ran into such a group one time, and they seemed to be having a great time together...
Good luck!

My husband isn't one, but wants to be one. I'd LOVE for him to be able to. Unfortunately, with our current financial situation, we both have to work.

How old is the kid(s)?

What is your hubby into?

Hi
If your husband is interested in making money while staying home, I have a very fulfilling opportunity for him. I would like to explain it in detail so that you have a better understanding of it and you can make an informed decision. My husband is also stay at home dad and this keeps him busy with a purpose. Good luck.
S.

My husband was a stay-at-home dad every summer when he no longer took his master's degree classes. It was just him and our son all day long. Some of the things that he did to break the cabin fever was take our son to the park and play catch with other dads who were also on break, take part in a softball league (evenings), get together with stay-at-home moms and their kids, and teach my son things that I never would have thought to teach him: how to climb a ladder at the playground (at 15 months!!!), how to flip a pancake, etc.

There are a lot of meetup groups that cater to stay at home parents on Meetup.com. It may be hard at first to find ones that will allow your husband to join. Mine is too far but we allow men into the group. This gives you idea of events going on also places to meet with other kiddos and adults ( usually moms) he could also start his own meetup group for SAHDs!

My DH works a part-time schedule, opposite of mine work schedule, and stays home during the day.

When I get home, I take my son and pretty watch him the rest of the day, except for if I'm making dinner that night. I often take him to the park as soon as I get home, so DH has some quiet time in the house by himself (he's an introvert & really needs it). I also pretty take care of our son on the weekend with only some help from DH, as he sometimes works, and also just needs to unwind.

One night per week, DH goes out with friends. I encourage him to do so, for his sanity. But he also really appreciates having the house to himself for a couple hours while I take the LO out of the house.

The newborn stage, up till about 6 months, was the hardest for DH, but it got easier (newborn was hardest, and it got easiest over time).

For during the day, when you can't give him a break, here are some things to try, so he doesn't feel so trapped in the house:

If the baby is small, you can use a carrier or stroller and go for walks, even just around the block to get out of the house. If the baby is toddling, take him/her to the park for playing is a great idea. My DH & son go every day if the weather is good. They also go to story time at the library -- check with your library to find out if they offer it, or if a nearby library does.

Our metroparks system offers programs for toddlers & preschoolers as well as older kids/teens/adults, and they will occasionally go to that.

You can also google your area and "stay at home dads" -- there is usually at least 1 SAHD group in most metro areas. Your DH might feel more comfortable doing play dates/activities with other dads than with moms. My DH is not much of a "joiner" so he has not really gotten involved with an parents groups.