M.C.
Welcome to the world of "things I was sure only other people's children did."
I don't have any great and wonderous advice, just to be consistant and stop with the scatter-shot method of thowing every consequence in the book at her every time. She's getting quite a rise out of you by doing it, so I'd cut out the emotion and remove her from the situation every single time with as little fanfare as possible. She's old enough to understand that she doesn't get to do fun things with others if she can't control herself and behave appropriately.
Hope it's a mercifully short-lived phase, and that you'll wind up with an extra dose of empathy for other parents!