My 3 1/2 year old boy does almost everything "by the book": i.e potty, knows the alphabet, has a wonderful vocabulary etc. However, his teacher in school mentioned that he does not hold the pen or a crayon correctly, presses very hard when scribbling and does not pedal a bike (he knows how, but refuses to do it). He has never been much for drawing, but he can do other things that require pretty intricate skills, like dressing himself, doing arts and crafts, cutting with scissors and so on. His teacher recommends seeing an occupational therapist to make sure that he won't have issues with writing when he goes to school. She says that intellectually he is ahead of other kids, and socializes wonderfully with others. She says that she does not think anything is really wrong, but thinks we should explore this to prevent a problem. Has anyone had the same issue, is this just normal or should I be worried?
Thank you so much.
Thank you so much to everyone who responded. Your words were very encouraging. I actually ended up taking my son to an Occupational therapist for an evaluation. He did a bunch of small motor tests with my son, and proceeded to tell me that there is absolutlely nothing wrong with him. He said that this is not a delay problem, but rather an "interest" in the task problem. The OT told me to practice drawing and coloring with him, but to not worry at all. I figured that if I didn't test him and something was wrong, I'd be kicking myself. So, again, thank you so much, I really appreciate the advice and the wisdom of other mommies!
I., how much did he crawl?
This may sound strange but you and Daddy play crawling games with him. There's great motor skill therapy in crawling...and you and Daddy will enjoy his laughter
Blessings, M.
I.,
I see you have gotten a lot of responses, and I did not take the time to read them all. My son had a motor skill delay too. I was shocked when he was diagnosed. I hadn't really noticed it and thought he was doing the same as his peers. He began to get OT through the school (at no cost to me) and he did great. He is in 1st grade no wand no longer gets therepy. His printing has improved so much and where before he did not like to write, draw, or color, now he loves it. I feel so glad that I put him into the therepy. Keep in mind, OT is a very busy and in demand area. He will not be given therepy unless the school district really thinks he needs it.
N.
He's fine!!!! Children develop fine motor skills OR intellectually. One will be apparent over the other. He has put so much time intellectually that he may not have developed his fine motor skills as well as intellectually. That is a no brainer. That teacher should not have said that, she knows the developmental stages of children and knows the other will catch up. Because he's "lagging" and I use that lightly, he's only 3! Look for opportunities to work on those things but don't push! In time they all even out! When you are writing let him mimic you. They have these things you put on a pencil that are rubber and soft. They have "dents" that each dent represents a finger so that a child holds the pencil correctly. Not a big deal, he's 3! Trust your instincts more!
-L.
I wouldn't worry too much about it. He is still young and if it doesn't interest him, he won't focus and practice... You could try some things on your own that mimic holding a pencil, like painting (water or real thing) Bring home some of your "tools" from work and have him pretend to do what mommy does, brush a set of fake teeth, floss them, etc... As long as his fine motor skills are developing, he should be fine. Just work with things that he thinks are fun. I have met children who have entered kindergarten without ever holding crayons or pencils...
I agree with the mothers who said to go with your gut. If you are concerned, then you should have him checked out. You know him better than anyone.
I think as long as he's generally progressing and has some areas in which he's excelling, you shouldn't worry. Personally, at 3 and 1/2 I wouldn't expect him to hold a writing utensil "correctly". My daughter's teacher told me the same thing about her last year when she was 3 and 1/2. I, frankly, thought it was a ridiculous comment to make about a child so young. Sure enough, this year she's doing just fine. If he's 6 and still isn't holding a pen correctly, then you might begin to worry.
Remember these benchmarks they set for our children are for an average child. No child progress through them exactly.
Having read all the responses, there seems to be some conflicting advice. My advice is go with your gut. If YOU think there is a problem, talk to your ped and ask for an OT recommendation/referral. If you think he's fine, wait and see how he progress over the next year. At 3-1/2, he has at least another year of school before Kindergarten. Lots of kids at this age don't hold a pencil correctly. Hope that helps!
M.
As an OT, I would recommend you see a pediatric or developmental OT. It may be as simple as they can help you problem solve as to why he's doing this and maybe give you some things to work on with him at home. This is also often covered by insurance so it may definatley be worth looking into, or he may qualify for EI services through the school district. Definately can't hurt to check it out, especially if your child benefits.
S.
Allentown
Hi I.,
I wouldn't waste my $$$ on an occupational therapist. The child is only 3 1/2! My son who is in kindergarten has issues holding his pencil correctly. It's really nothing to worry about. We work with him and show him the correct way.....and he's improving. His writing skills are advanced, as are his reading and math skills.
I think the pre-K teacher is jumping the gun. I think if you and the teacher show him the correct way, over time, he'll do it the right way.
L.
I personally would not worry about it. I can't tell you how many times I've been concerned about the one area of development my kids were lagging in (or refused to do), and boom it comes together in no time. Kids do things in their own time. I work at a preschool and we try very hard to appreciate the differences in children rather than recommending specialists they should go to in order to fix their non problems. This well meaning teacher should stick with teaching.
I am have a 5 year who has a delay with the small motor skills and he went to pre school, pre k and even Kindergarten where everyone keeps saying it will catch up. Now i am worried we may have to hold him back from Kindergarten, because it is affecting his learning and he struggles with the coloring and writing where he just does not want to do it. he cries and gets himself so upset over it!! I would definetly watch and talk to your peditrician!!
Hi I.,
Contact your local Intermediate unit for help with O.T. services. They can test him and give him services free of charge until he is school age when the district takes over. Also. he's only 3 1/2! It's great that the school is on the ball, but if he does the other skills well, (especially cutting with scissors), he'll probably be fine. Get him pencil grips which will help him to grip the pencil better! Good Luck!
My son received OT when he was in pre-school for the same issues. One year after receiving services, they put him on a consult only status because he made soooo much progress. His confidence increased. It was great for him. The therapist went to his preschool which was great. He loved his therapist and really responded to her. I think having the extra help is always a good thing. Good luck!
I just read some of the other responese. We didn't pay for services. OUrs came through the district. But like someone else said, because of his age he should qualify for ealry intervention. Check on line with whatever county you are in. Also, I would think the preschool has some info.
Hi I.,
When my son was in 2nd grade the teacher told me that he does not hold a pencil correctly and his handwritting is very bad. However she skimmed over how well hhe was progressing and learning.She said his books were very diorganized.So I told her that he is lefthanded and as I am lefthanded we tend to hold the pencil differently.I also told her that I heard boys often have bad handwriting.I also mentioned that maybe he could keep a book or two on his desk so that he would become more organized.Oh Also she was concerened with his sloppy eating habits and thought that I should possibly seek help so in future years he will not be made fun of.
I didnt get help .I only gave him extra napkins for lunch and snack. I told him to slow down with writting .which was a constant reminder but that is about it.
He is now in 8th grade--All honor classes. Uses the keyboard for most of his writing.His male teacheres he says have a worse handwriting then himself.
Nursury and young grade teachers look for these problems that usually are not a problem.If he cant tie shoes or hold objects I would get him checked out.Also as far as bike riding my son also waited with that and rode with out training wheels way past most kids.(he was afraid of falling).Now he plays sports gets knocked down and comes up laughing.
If you really think there is a delay you make the decision.I think many boys have these natural delays because they are a different makeup from girls.
Goodluck,
L.
I had a very similar experience. My son is very advanced as far as counting, vocabulary, etc etc etc but his preschool teachers said he was having trouble holding a pencil/crayon. He had never liked/enjoyed/initiated coloring or drawing activities and would just scribble darkly when given paper/pencil/crayon etc. But unlike your son, he was also having trouble cutting with scissors. I made an appt for an OT eval but it was going to mean going ALL summer waiting for the appt. I hired someone privately for O. hour per week over the summer and after the eval, he got unlimited OT coverage and went O. hour per week for about 4 months and, let me tell you, I cannot believe the change in his skills in that short time! It was WELL worth the time & effort to take him once a week. He graduated from OT writing very well, coloring better and now knows how to tie his shoes! I disagree with the previous post and am of and have been of the opinion that better sooner rather than later when it comes to getting kids the help they need to overcome these small issues in life.
Please feel free to pm me if you'd like to chat/have any other questions for me!
Hi I.,
Is your boy a good child in school? If he is, talk to your pediatrician. Try not become alarmed.
Good luck. All the best. D.
I am usually pretty into getting kids the help they need as early as possible myself. But from what you described,I can't figure that that would warrant early intervention.
It never hurts to have it checked out and if this is a reputabible preschool and an intelligent teacher, she probably does know what is developmentally appropriate. But in my experience you have to have a delay of 25% in order to recieve services and your son doesn't sound like that is the case at all.
I'm a teacher myself and there is definately a camp that says kids shouldn't even be holding a pencil until kindergarten so that the kindergarten teacher can teach them the correct way right from the start. I'm not as extreme as that but I wouldn't expect proper pencil grip until more like 4- 4.5 yrs.
Definately have it checked out but Do Not worry at all.
Some things You can do to encourage fine motor skills, are playdough, legos, playing with water and eyedroppers (I use medicine droppers from the pharmacy), watercolor painting especially the pre colored ones you just paint with water are great and kids really love them. Practice having him put pennies into a piggy bank or make one by cutting a slit in a plastic margarine tub, to make it harder have him hold two pennies in his hand as he manipulates one at at time into the bank. I've got other ideas but no more time.
oh and it never hurts to have his eyes examined too, since vision problems can effect how they reach for an object --not explaining that well but it's a perception thing.
don't worry, but please let us know what happens.
My son has a similar problem but he is 5. We took him to see a developmental ped. who referred us to an Occupational Therapist. He has made huge improvements. Since your son is younger he might qualify for early intervention. It can't hurt to call.
Good luck!
I.,
My son had a similar problem and didn't color or anything until he was four. His pre-school teacher took a lot of time teaching him how to hold a pencil and using it to write his name. This may just not be his strong suit and it will take time and attention to get used to it. This is a skill most girls have mastered by 3 because they like to color. A bit of OT won't hurt him and I would suggest he takes it and moves on. It sounds like he doesn't have an overall problem, just in the writing area.
Hi I.,
I was a Kindergarten teacher before I became a Mommy. I wouldn't be worried about this. If he's still having trouble by Kindergarten, he can see an OT through the public school. The fact that he can dress himself and do other intricate skills puts my mind at ease about his fine motor abilities. :)
~C.
A blog about fun, academic activities: http://daisyandpear.blogspot.com
