Should We Have Another Baby? - Twin Falls,ID

Not going through this (other than the cramped space issue and daycare cost of having another) but I would weigh your pros and cons.

If you go to school, your baby will have to be in daycare. If you don't, you can stay home with him/her and maybe take fewer classes.

If you add another now, you may not have as much money (but if you aren't putting the baby in daycare, it's really just about diaper cost and formula if you do not bf). If you wait, you will be closer to advanced maternal age, which comes with some risks (not always, but more common after age 35).

Most importantly - what do the two of you both want to do? Are you on the same page? And also, I would not rely strictly on the plan that 2 months after you taking out the IUD that you would become pregnant.

All that being said, if I were in your shoes, I would take out the IUD, kick school into high gear (taking as many classes as I could) and do that until the baby were born. Then I'd plan to take time off with the baby (even a semester if that is what you need to do) and maybe get a part time job while hubby is home so we wouldn't need daycare. Then you could see how much schooling you have left and see what your best options are.

You are right that you will never be 'ready' financially for another unless you are a millionaire!!

In our case, we'd like another but I do not want another one in daycare (we have two currently) and want a bigger house. So for that to happen, I want to either move or add on and then have my daughter be at least 4 years old (so if we did get pregnant right away the baby would be born the summer before she goes to Kindergarten and I could keep her home that summer in order to save on daycare costs).

GOOD LUCK!

Eh, you have all the time in the world to further your career and make pots of money. But you only have 10 or so years to have a baby! Parenthood in the whole scheme of life is very short, I say go for it, too!

Like another poster, I've noticed financially things tend to work themselves out (least they have for my fam), doesn't matter HOW much money you have, you'll always wish there was more! Of course my kids are older and I have the benefit of hindsight, since when I discovered I was pregnant with the third, is was scary!

What would you regret more, to put this on hold or risking the other? We usually are able to adjust to different things that come up, financially. But usually the things that stand out more is not having that baby that we really wanted. You will automatically make adjustments in your lifestyle and plans. Those things always seem to work themselves out better than if we planned every single detail. I say "Go for it!" But that's just me. =) Good luck to you!!

There is an old adage that i think applies to anyone who has ever worried about being financially prepared for a child, that if you wait until you are financially stable to have a child that day will never come. I am not saying be irresponsible and go out and have six kids and be on welfare, but if having two kids is important to you there is a limited window of time to make babies and your entire life to make a career. There is also having your children be a certain difference in ages, I mean I love the way it all turned out for me and my kids are about as far apart as can be : 3, 10 and 15...weigh the pros and cons but do not let something that is important to you slip away because you were worried about finances. There are a million ways to be frugal and pinch pennies and re evaluate what is important to you...I do not think you can place a dollar value on the happiness a child can bring you. Feeling like your family is complete is priceless...

i'm right there with you, i don't think anyone can really "afford" it have to just "do" my husband and i want another too. he's unemployeed which is not so great, so i told him my criteria is to get a part time job and school full time make his schedule so that he can be home during the day while i'm at work..........other than that there's ALWAYS a reason NOT to financially

I completely agree with Shelby W. There never seems to be a perfect time to have kids. There never seems to be enough money, time, etc, but you just make it work. It sounds like life will only get more hectic for you later down the road. On the money front, have you ever considered doing part time work from home? I've been working from home, about 5-10 hours per week, since my first was born and it has saved us financially. Plus, I have had the luxury of being home with my kids. It doesn't necessarily sound like that is what you are looking for, but maybe having an extra $500-$1000 per month would lighten the stress around having another child. If you want to look into it, I'd be happy to share what I've been doing. Take care!

Before I had kids and when I was choosing between food, medicine, and bus fair I would yell DON'T GET PREGNANT!
Now that I have a child and plenty of money, I can say that having children closer together is better(unless they don't get along) and that not putting a child in daycare is the best if you can swing it. If you WANT a child, have one. If you are not sure, wait.

Like others have said . . . If you wait until you are financially able or stable, you'll never have another child. That would be a real shame. We had 8 kids and I was never able to afford any of them, but we made do and figured out how to support them. I love them all and I know how empty my life would be if I hadn't had any kids or had had just 2 or 3. We raised them to be good people and good citizens and I'm very happy with them. (I wouldn't stop at just two. 4 or more seems to be the ideal number for those that raise their kids to be good kids. And with us, the closer they are together the better off you are and the better they work and play together. And the more things they will do together as adults.)

Like someone else said. Remove your birth control and get pregnant. Then go to school full time and carry as much school work as you possibly can and when your baby arrives, just take one class to keep your schooling continuous. You'll be surprised how much you can accomplish doing it that way. Save your easy, elective classes for after the baby arrives.

There are lots of posts and suggestions on mamapedia about how to save money. Look them up and save as much as you can now. Often times careful and wise shopping can save a family as much as a part time job. I shop really well. If you have questions, e-mail me.

Good luck to you and yours.

you will never be able to "afford" it....LOL - just do it - it will work itself out!

Just a few things to think about:
I've only heard people say they regretted NOT having more children. I honestly have never met any mom who says "I wish we only had (this many) kids".

I got pregnant the first month with my first two kids, and at age 35 with the third, it took 9 months. Your body changes and things are sometimes beyond your control. You can't just expect that it will do what you want it to do when you want.

I have several friends who wanted a family, and put it off to pay for the house, go to school, travel, etc. When they finally got around to trying to have kids (or more kids), they realized that some things are beyond their control. They struggled getting pregnant (or pregnant again), had to use fertility treaments, some even adopted, and this process took years.

It's OK if you decide to pursue the career. But sometimes, it doesn't work out that you get the career and the kids (or more kids). Lots of women do both and it works out for them, but sometimes your resources only allow for one or the other. When you're at work, you wish you could be with your kids, when you're with your kids, you have desire to be out in the world working at times. I've struggled with this over the years and after waching my oldest "grow up" (he's only 5!), I realize that babies grow up quickly and I'm grateful for the time I have with them. I don't want to regret not spending time with them. The other stuff will be there when they are older.

We are pregnant with #3. It will be tight financially. I discovered that we qualify for WIC, which has been a huge help. I also plan to breastfeed and use cloth diapers, which will save us tons of money. Those things will be harder to do since I work part-time, but we simply can't afford not to.

Just my thoughts. I'm not putting you down in any way. The hard thing about these decisions, is that there really isn't a wrong decision, it's whatever works for you and your family. God Bless.

I say if you want another baby then do it! If finances are a concern then why not put off school? You can always go back to school but you cannot always have babies. The funny thing about having kids is we all worry so much about how to afford them when in reality, it just works out. Your kids never care where you live, what you have, what you wear (maybe as a teen) they just want you and your time and love. Go have a baby and enjoy!

Good luck with your decision!

You should really search your heart and find the answer to this question. If you feel that you will always regret not having this baby, then you should not worry about money. You never know what is around the corner. Don't wait too long. I waited for my third and ended up with twins because the older you get, the greater the possibility that you will release two eggs!! I was 37 when I got pregnant with them. Good luck on this important decision.

I am currently going to school and I have 4 children, (all boys). I had my babies first and now I am going to school, it's my turn. If you feel that you want another child or more than one, now is the time to do it. If you wait you may not be so lucky getting pregnant as quickly as the last time. School will always be there, the bills will always be there, but somehow we manage. If it takes me 10 years to get my degree (it better not) then so be it. I am willing to do that because I chose to have my children first, and I don't regret it at all. I'm not telling you that its easy, its far from easy, but its reality and I wouldn't have it any other way. Make sure you have alot of support and go for it. You will be forever blessed by your posterity, a career is just icing on the cake.

My opinion is if you keep on waiting there will always be something else that comes up, get your degree then have a great opportunity to work, just an example... Do you want kids or not? Everything else will fall into place, you'll be able to manage and still have a great fulfilling life. Sure there will be days when you are exhausted, days when you may wonder how this or that will be paid for... but the reward of having children out ways them to me. Just my two cents...