Should I Bring up the Speech Issue with the Mom?

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My daughter just turned 4 and has those same issues. She's had speech therapy for over a year now. I would definitely bring it up, but in a very loving, concerned way. I was reluctant at first to seek help because I thought my daughter was too young, but she was only 2 when I decided to have her tested. Turned out she had a severe delay. I would talk to the parent(s) in private, in a way that doesn't seem like they're under attack. Maybe ask them if she is receiving services and if not, let them know that as her daycare provider, you've noticed certain speech patterns, such as leaving off the first consonant of words, and that you think it would be beneficial to have her tested. If possible, have the number on hand of who they should contact just to give them a push in the right direction. Good luck!!

No, not normal at all for a 4 year old. Leaving off the beginning or end of words is normal for a 2 year old. At 4, you should be able to understand almost everything she says even though she may not be able to say the letter R or the Th sound. My babysitter brought my son's speech delay to my attention when he was 2. I already thought there was a problem so this came as no surprise. I got him help and now he speaks like he is supposed to speak. Meanwhile she babysits a girl my son's age. The babysitter has spoken to the mom several times about getting the child help for her speech. The mother has chosen not to do anything. I think you should bring it up but then it's up to the mom. I hope she follows through. At this age, the child needs to be evaluated by the school district, not early intervention.

Just another thought on ways to approach it (I think you know that there is a problem and you are really just asking the "best" way to bring it up to the mom, correct?)...

What if you approached her with the assumption that she IS receiving speech services? " Mrs. _____, I noticed that 'Maggie' drops the consonants on her words. I was wondering what her speech therapist suggests I do as far as correcting her when I notice it."

She will probably say "Oh, she's not seeing a speech therapist. Do you think she SHOULD be?" Which is a perfect opportunity to suggest someone, or a resource for her to look into.

You could always take the direct approach, as several other moms have mentioned. And normally, I prefer to be direct myself. But, us mom's can be very defensive about someone "attacking" our kids or our parenting... and if you act as if you assume she is already addressing the issue, you put her in a favorable light, giving her the benefit of the doubt. Not looking like she didn't notice or ignored a problem.

There isn't an easy way to say something so likely to garner a defensive reaction. Good luck.

tell her and have the number ready for early childhood intervention. she can get free speech therapy and really probally doesn't know it is a problem

If you can recommend resources that she can pursue (school district help, etc.) that would be good - to let her know, and give her a resource to seek out helps. She may not react well - it's just how moms are sometimes. But the child needs help This doesn't sound normal at all and she'll need to be able to communicate when she gets to kindergarten. Good luck!

The child needs speech therapy.
Better now than later, when she is already in grade school.

My son had speech therapy until he was close to 3 years old.

No, not all 4 year olds, speak like that girl you described.

I just went through this at my daycare. I have spoken to the parents twice and still they seem to think she is going to grow out of it. Finally, I gently told them in class one of the children mad fun of how she said glitter, she said ditter, there is not a beginning sound she says clearly. Cupcakes, is supcakes, accross is affoss the street. It is really bad and she will be 4 next month. I told her that children can be cruel and I am afraid that she will become so self conscious that she will stop speaking, with fear of being made fun of. She is already speaking very low because the children have begun corrected her constantly. I think that finally worked and they are seeing an evaluation. Some sounds are normal for children to have difficulty with and come when they are older but in this case which sounds just like yours, all of the beginning sounds are absent and it is nearly impossible to understand her. The speech therapist that comes to my center for another child, told me it is developing sounds in the back of their throat so they need help developing them, and they will not come on their own. I do not think waiting is wise. Just be gentle and say that even though they understand her others do not and you don't want it to become an issue for her when she goes to grammar school. Good luck!!

The mother has to know that her daughter's speech is the way it is. I personally know three five year olds who have recently started K that speak this way. None of them have had speech therapy, and they haven't improved any with two months of school. Makes me wonder what the heck everyone's thinking.

It's pretty touchy, though, to recommend it to her mother. I mean, her mother HAS to know. I'm sorry you're stuck in this situation, and I guess I would suggest that YOU work with her all you can. When she says something wrong, stress it out the right way..."Yes, you would like a BaNaNa," etc. I got one of my neighbor children to start saying at least a few words correctly this summer, just by stressing the word every time he said it and asking him to repeat it. None of my business, really, but what is his own mother doing with him? Nothing. Sad.

It would be a good idea to let them know your concern. We are in the process of getting speech therapy through our school district for our son. Another little kid told their parent, "he talks like a baby," and even though my son did not hear that, I felt so bad for him. Also, my son has the inverse problem: he says the first consonants and the rest is vowels. Like "bumblebee" would be "bu a ee". He also uses the "y" sould to replace other, more difficult letter sounds. It sounds like the kid you are caring for would qualify for services.

Definitely keep working with her. If she's in a good mood when she asks for something and doesn't say it correctly, you can try asking her to repeat the word the way you say it. Only when she does say it correctly (or at first makes a good attempt) do you give her what she's asked for. My son's speech therapist recommended we do this. She did clarify that this is something to do when he/she is in a fairly good mood and not when the child is really hungry or cranky.

The mom would have to talk to her pediatrician or the local school district, as Early Intervention is birth to 3 years.

I would let the mom know about your concerns. My 4 year old is in speech because his pediatrician noticed his speech at his 4 year check up. Sadly, we were so accomostomed to hearing his speech that we did not really recognize the problem because we could understand him. He is my first and I guess I was just clueless. Once it was pointed out to me and my husband, we could see the issues with L, V and S sounds. He has a history of ear infections with two tube placements. He is now almost 5 and his speech is improving with speech therapy. His mom might just not know just like my husband and I.

I think you should say something. I agree, better now than before she goes to school. They have awhile to work on it before Kindergarten.

Since you have older kids, I'm assuming you do little crafts and activities, maybe coloring letter sheets and such right? So then when telling mom what she did that day, I would gently say, "Today we worked a little bit on pronouncing the first consonants in the words, and some of the dropped sounds in the middle of words that she has a tendency to do. She seems to really enjoy it! I'm not a speech therapist of course, but I hope that working on these sounds can help her speech improve" :)

http://www.righttrackreading.com/tipstosaysounds.html
http://teachmetotalk.com/2008/03/23/working-toward-intell... (scroll down to number 4)
http://www.sorensenwebsites.com/babies/languageskills.php