Today my 5-year-old (a level 3 going on lever 4 swimmer) dove head first into the shallow end of a pool. She has never done this before, so i warned her never to dive into the shallow end again and that I'd take her to the deep pool if she wanted to dive. So I drug my 2 year old and her over to the enormous 50 meter pool and me and sister watched her while she jumped in an out of the 15' deep pool without hesitation. Mind you she has swam in her aunties pool with a deep end, but this is the largest pool i've ever seen in real life and our first time to it (its 50 meters in the narrow direction and 4 x as long) and I can tell you there were no other 5,6,7, 8 or even 9 year olds in sight. Then she simply went over and got in line to jump off the 5' high diving board with the 10 and 12 year old kids like there was nothing to it. I wanted to be proud of her, but something tells me she is going to scare the hell out of me as a fearless teenager. I keep thinking motorcycles, rock jumping, and extreme sports. Parents of teenagers, any insights for me? Is there still a chance she will develop normal healthy fears? I was so fearful as I child, I'm struggling to relate. And while sure, its great to have a kid who tries new things, I can't help but think there is a flip side to this coin. Should I worry? But more specifically, anyone have a teenager who went from fearless to healthy fear?
That sounds normal for some kids. My son was doing that last year, age 3 after his first two sessions of swim lessons. He knows how to swim, swimming is fun. Have at it.
You can worry if you want, but what would be the point?
You don't want to squelch her spirit and/or make her think there is something to be afraid of.
I would think the best thing you can do is have a really healthy relationship with her, so she trusts you and knows you want her to be safe. You don't want her to feel she needs to hide things from her. Also, keep talking to her about being safe and being aware of your surroundings and the things you need to be aware of before trying something new.
You're not going to change who she is, so just make sure she remains thoughtful as well as fearless.
My "fearless" daughter has turned into the teenager who, within 3 months of driving, got two tickets and had one (minor) accident.
She's also the first kid I had to go pick up drunk from a party :-(
But she's ALSO the girl ALL the kids and parents want to babysit, because she's actually really responsible (when it comes to other peoples' kids) and fun, and she is really popular with the staff and teachers at school, for her outgoing and positive attitude.
Many successful people started out as daredevils and/or troublemakers. My husband is a prime example of that.
That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!!!
My SD was fearless, always jumping off of things, etc. We enrolled her in gymnastics. She was fearless at first, but quickly learned some self control. It was good, because she was able to fall without seriously hurting herself. Still, falling is good because she learned she's not bulletproof!
You'll have a lot of heart attacks, but it's also a lot of fun :)
Hang on for the ride of your life! The head first I to a shallow end of pool is what you should be scared of. It could have been tragic. I think you need to really keep talking about safety when at the pool. It's great that she is so good at it, but there has to be a balance.
Of course, every characteristic is a double-edged sword. As a parent, you can rejoice in her bravery while worrying about her recklessness. I'm sure your parents rejoiced in your caution while worrying about your timidity. I think, for you, the challenge will be to make sure that your daughter considers the logical consequence of her actions before she does them. It's ok if she leaps, but you want to teach her to look first.
We can worry...but it does us no good!
ALL my kids have swam and dived into the deep end of an Olympic size pool & jumped off the high dive at that age...my youngest was only 2 when she learned to swim and swim in the deep end and get stuff off our deep end of our pool (only 8ft.) but you wanna talk about scary? Try watching your 3y/o dive down & get a toy off the deep end close to the bottom drain!!! SCARY!!!
The diving into the shallow end is VERY scary & you need to make sure you talk to all your kids about how dangerous that is!
My oldest son is 9y/o now and he is fearless...he's my one I worry about breaking his neck! Seriously!! He cliff jumps with his dad...climbs to the tippy top of the trees, everything!
So know you are not alone! We just worry, it's what we do as Mommy!
Just be proud. I honestly don't see this as risky behavior. Although my kids are not in the least bit dare devils or risk takers they have been going off the diving board since 4 yo when they were capable of swimming the length of the pool.
I've seen a couple of the biographies that were done on some of the Olympic diving champions.
They had no fear of the deep end of the pool and had no fear of the high diving boards. You can decide what you do with or for your child. Being an Olympian is really something, but it takes dedication and sacrifice on the part of the athlete and parents and coaches. AND a big bank account.
Good luck to you and yours.
I had a daredevil boy. He's almost 12 and is just now discovering he's not bulletproof. I think some change, some don't. Good luck and enjoy the ride she takes you on!! :)
