Hi,
I will try to keep it "g." I'm wondering if any other expecting moms have had husbands that don't want to have sex. I've heard about the husbands who do and moms who don't, but I'm finding myself in the opposite position. I am now 32 weeks and it's freaking my husband out, he can't stop imagining what the baby must think. This is not our first, out 3rd... My brain understands and see what he's saying, but I'm having a "I feel beautiful while pregnant" moment and I want to take advantage of it. Because this is my 3rd, I know that after the baby, there will be no time, sleep deprivation, my boobs will leak and my stomach will look like a twinkie!!! I want to calm his fears and go on a babymoon before the baby, but what's the point if there's no sex :0) ??? Stories? Suggestions? Thanks!!
My sister's husband was the same way with all 3 of their kids. He would stop having sex at 5 months because he thought it was weird for the baby. She even asked the OB/GYN in front of him if sex was okay--but that didn't help. He just wouldn't do it!
well um, the more sex I had closer to my due date, the more "contractions" I had. And my daughter came 1 week early.
I don't know if there is a correlation or not?
OMG!!! A twinkie! lol SO TRUE! lol I am currently 31 weeks along with our 4th. lol So I know all about the twinkie look. lol
My hubby never really had any issues with the sex since the dr told him with our first that baby can't see or feel anything more than rocking... About as if mommy was walking... Baby isn't judging technique. lol And I stress the fact that it won't be long before daddy is gonna have to do without for a bit...
If hubby is having issues with it, there really is not anything you can do more than telling him your gonna want " it" before bed time... (prior warning tactic) or initiate things yourself...
OMG what do you mean a twinkie ?
It seems as though a lot of people missed your question! If your hubbie's issue is "the baby" , then maybe alternatives such a oral or mutual masturbation/vibrator are in your future. I find it hard, though, to believe that 'baby' is the ussue if you did not have a problem with the other two pregnancy's. You need to get to the bottom of what his real issue is. You may not like it, but honesty is the best policy.
Been there too! My hubby just doesn't want me after I get to be a certain size. It's very sad because I feel beautiful and special getting to be a part of something so amazing. I don't think his problem is even the baby.. he just loses the attraction I guess. It really sucks to feel unattractive because of a spouse... but I guess it's just something some of us have to deal with. I definitely second the babymoon as well, he could have other stresses in his life making him want it less. Getting away might make it more relaxing for him. Definitely don't pressure him, cause that will just make things worse! Good luck with everything.
LOL....Baby feels a rocking motion and sex actually makes delivery easier for the mother. If there is no problems in the pregnancy sex is very beneficial.
WIth my first there was never an issue, but with my second I was ldef. in the mood all the way until the very end but my husband wasn't having any of it. He just couldn't bring himself to do it, literally! haha! It bothered him so much that there was a little baby so close in there that he just could not do it. I respected that, what other choice did I have, but it was a bummer! Good luck! and you can always be close to your husband without the actual "act" taking place, so I'd still push for the babymoon if i were you.
I feel ya! We had more issues with my first pregnancy, hubby felt weird about the baby. With the second, he knew it would be awhile before we'd be doing it again, so he was more accommodating! We are at a point where our sex drives are not on the same page in general - when he's too tired or too stressed out, he's just not in the mood. And both of us gained weight with my last pregnancy, so he's feeling self-conscious about his body, too. I'm pretty much always in the mood, or can become so. :) I'd try all the suggestions offered, and if nothing works out, just try to keep in mind that it won't be long before things are back to normal. And you ARE beautiful, so don't let it make you feel badly that he's not interested. Good luck!
My DH had some of these issues, too, more with our 2nd than our 1st! I had to find multiple books & articles showing him that sex is beneficial at this point--for mom AND dad! Surely your DH understands that the baby doesn't think anything about it--as a matter of fact, the motion tends to rock the little one to sleep!
Congrats on feeling beautiful pregnant!! That is fantastic!
I'd shoot for the romance and just cuddling and hope for more if he feels up for it. Wear some really nice slinky stuff and plan on having a snack in the bedroom and watching something special or listen to good music. If you only end up with snuggles and compliments, you'll know where his mental block is. It's not uncommon, and now that he has kids who comprehend the world better than a newborn does, he can think of the belly baby thinking that way (obviously they have no clue what you're up to). It's just a mental block they get, and women have it sometimes, too.
Good luck!
Honey... when you were in the womb, how did you feel when you mum ate/slept/cleaned/peed/had sex/did her taxes/etc?
