I had a similar experience, my 4 year old had fallen and hit his mouth, we were worried about his teeth/gums so took him to a dentist that came very highly recommended by several of my friends. We went to him, were told that we needed to immediately remove the front 2 teeth to avoid infection, etc., and would need to fill like 5 or so cavities, and replace the teeth with temp teeth, etc. (SEVERAL thousand dollars of work!) So, I went and got a "2nd opinion" from the pediataric dentist we now use-- Dr. Sandy McDougal. She is absolutely wonderful and the kids love her! We've referred about 10 of our friends' kids to her and they all adore her as well! End result, she said we do NOT need to pull the teeth (he still has them today w/no problems!) and he did NOT have ANY cavities!!!
That being said, before you put your child through ANY of what you stated above, please go to her and get her opinion as well!
Here's her info:
Pediatric Dentist: Sandra McDougal, ###-###-####
(her office is located just off of Bush tollway & coit, behind Central Market).