Ok, here's what my attorney told me once my divorced was finalized. He signed it, you signed it, the judge signed it, it's now the law.
She said at any point in time if HE wishes to change the terms, he certainly has that RIGHT to TRY. And YOU certainly have the right, WITH LEGAL COUNCIL to fight it. She said if this happens, to call her back, and the first thing on the list will be me asking HIM to pay my attorney's fees.
Judges do not like it when a ruling has been made, agreed upon by BOTH PARTIES, then one of the parties change their minds. Unless there is a major financial change in his life.
So, I would retain an attorney (open a new credit card if you have to), fight the changes I didn't like, and ask the already annoyed judge order HE pay my legal fees. This is actually pretty common.
I would not pay much attention to HIS lawyer, you are not her client and she can very well tell you the sky is green if she likes. It's her job to intimidate you.
Sorry you are going through this. My guy's divorce is now 4 years and about 100k old, sigh.
Really, get another lawyer, sorry. You can try the Legal Aid Society in your county, but they will tell you what steps you need to take to go it alone, it's unlikely they will actually offer you free or reduced legal council.
:(