Real Experiences of People Who Were Young in School.

I was younger than all of the rest of my class, and it was very difficult. Academically I was ok, but physically I was not as coordinated. I couldn't jump rope and play jacks when they were able to. I was the last to drive, the last to date. I didn't fit in.

I kept my own very bright daughter back a year to be one of the older ones in her class. It made the academics much easier, she was not dragged into puberty before she was ready, and I got to have her at home a year longer. She got to be on the leading edge of her class, not the last to get to do everything. It was one of the best decisions I ever made.

My son is now 21 and applying to med school. I started him in kindergarten at 5 years 1 month old. He was smart enough but to keep up mentally but it was hard on him physically. The bigger boys were hard on him, they tended to try to take control and get him into trouble. I had him tested in the second grade and he was smart enough to go to Ricks School for the gifted in the third grade. He did a lot better at the GT school because he wasnt out of place any longer.

Best of luck!

I have heard a lot of people stating that it is better to start boys later than girls because boys are not mentally or emotionally ready to start school. My son was almost 6 when he started since his bday is in December and I wish I could have waited another year.

Dear S.,
My daughter started kindergarten at 4. She was so ready.
She was little for her age. She's 24 now and still just a little pixie. She got the nick name "Mighty Mouse" and at first she didn't like it because she thought it was meant in a teasing way. To be honest, it fit her perfectly.
Other than that, she never felt out of place or anything, she made friends easily. She was already so bored with pre-k that I didn't have much choice to let her go ahead and go.
The only downside that I saw was that she graduated so early. It wasn't a problem for anyone other than me. I am deeply sentimental and I don't know...I just felt like the whole thing creeped up on me too fast.
There are upsides to graduating early, you can have a 4 year college degree by the time you're 21 or 22.

I have no regrets about my daughter starting school early. I NEVER thought, "Gosh, I wish I'd waited another year." At least in my daughter's case, that just simply never happened. She never regretted it either.

You know your son better than anyone. Fortunately, you do have some time to decide what you think is best. I knew what was best for my daughter and fortunately, I didn't have anyone telling me I would be sorry down the road.

It will be interesting to see what other replies you get.

Just do what you think is best for your son.

Best wishes!

I, too, am a November birthday, and when I started school I was within the regular admission dates to start at age 4. I didn't have any issues whatsoever, and I was also in the gifted program.

That said, I am now a teacher, and I feel parents should wait for their child to be five when they enter kindergarten. I have seen children through the past six years that started school early, and while academics may not always be an issue, I can see a maturity issue. These students, while not a major standout, are definitely behind their peers. It's a developmental thing, not a a parenting thing. Every time I talk with parents that started their kids early, or even ones that had kids with birthdays on the cusp, I always hear, "I wish I would have waited one more year".

So, my recommendation is to wait until your child is of age to register. There are ways to help a child that is high achieving, but it's a bigger regret if you start your child too soon.

I was young in school, starting Kindergarten at 4 yrs, 10 months. I didn't have any problems academically at any point in school (including High school) but socially, it was rough. Especially in junior high and H.S. I simply wasn't as mature as many of the other children. Most friends had their drivers licenses as sophomores. I couldn't get one until I was a junior (and my parents wouldn't let me drive with a newly licensed friend after dark - so no going out at night with friends unless my parents drove me and picked me up). My curfew was earlier, so even as a junior and senior - when I could drive myself or drive with friends after dark - I had to exit early. I am relieved that my son has just missed the cutoff for starting school as an almost-5 year-old - he'll start at almost 6 and be ready to keep up and all areas.

YES, YES, YES!!! Boy did I ever feel out of place. When I started school the cut off in the district was Nov. 1st. I was born on Oct. 31st. I was ALWAYS the youngest in my class. Always the last to turn certain ages and the last one to get my drivers license. I hated it. I would not push any child to go through that. Even if you think your child is ready for kindergarten, I would allow the child another year. Why the rush? I also taught elementary school for 26 years. Allow your child his childhood. He'll grow up fast enough!

I volunteer for playground duty at a k-8 school once a week. I see smaller children from a kindergarten class who are out of place on the playground. I don't know if they're younger but I do know that being immature in social skills is a handicap.

If a child is advanced they can skip a grade which I think would be better. One of my friends, back before Kindergarten was available, started first grade but was moved to second grade after the first few weeks. This was not a problem for her. But she is a girl.

Boys mature, socially, much later than girls. I've not seen a boy who was as socially mature as the girls in his classroom at the middle school level. I once held a middle school teaching certificate. And I see middle school students interact on the play ground. I think that starting him early may become a handicap once he's older even tho it's not now.

Have you considered getting a professional evaluation and talking with an educator? I know you didn't ask that question. I just know that social maturity becomes increasingly more important as the child ages.

Hi S. - I think every kid is different and you are the best judge on whether or not your child is ready. If he tries going to kinder and is just not ready to advance, it will be very apparent to you and the teacher. There was a teacher who posted in the last few days about really discouraging young boys from starting early - I respect her experience but boys mature at different rates no matter what their ages. My husband had a friend named John who was the same age as he was. John didnt mature until summer before 10th grade when everyone else started in 8th grade. He left 9th grade still looking like a skinny little kid and came back to school 5 in. taller.

I'm a winter baby like your son but I had to start late because of our state's cutoff date. I was always older than my friends which was great when I got my license but by the time I graduated H.S. I actually felt like I was behind for college because I was nearly a year older than some.

My oldest son started kinder at 5yr 1mo and overall he's doing fine. He's a good solid height for his age and is the same size as many kids 6mos older than he so they dont notice much difference. I dont really even notice much of an emotional difference either. Some 7yr olds are mature and some 8yr olds not so much. The big difference I see is what we allow him to watch on TV/movies and the video games he plays. We watch those very carefully where some of his classmates are already watching Terminator and the like and they expect him to be doing the same.

I think it all depends on your child's personality and where his maturity is. My 7 year old is also "young" for her class but she is reading at a 6th grade level and is highly independent (too much so sometimes, oy). She has struggled to fit in socially because she acts a bit more immature than some of the other children. I am not a big advocate for pre-school but I sent my daughter for one year because she was itching to learn and socialize with other children. BUT we skipped kindergarten and she went on to 1st grade because she was so far ahead of the kindergarteners.
Trust your gut. If you feel that your child is shy, not eager to go to school then let him stay home another year. You know your child better than any test or teacher. If he needs to be home then let him stay. But if he seems eager to try it then let him go. I hope that helps. =)

I was not one of the young ones in my class, but thought I'd offer my own decisions about the same situation in our household. We decided to wait to send my son to public kindergarten for another year. His b-day is 3 days b/f the cutoff. He is small, and overly emotional at times, although he does well in general with social settings. However, he is academically ready for a new challenge, so we are compromising by sending him to a small private KG (which only costs slightly more than we're paying for daycare anyway) followed by a second year of KG when he transitions to his bigger public KG. We tell him that this way he is extra lucky in that he gets to go twice! My concern is not so much his lack-of or over-readiness in KG, 1st 2nd, etc, but more the impact of being younger than the rest in his teen years when social pressures are high. Good luck!

I had an early October birthday. My parents were educators and saw enough to realize that it is much better to have me be the oldest in the class for a number of reasons, the most important being social development. They entered me into K as the oldest child. After 2 weeks, the teacher talked them into moving me ahead to 1st grade - against their better judgement. I was more than ready academically - I was still the top of my class all the way through. But socially, I really suffered. By junior high I had pretty much caught up & things were fine, but elementary school was extremely difficult. I was emotionally bullied and it affected my self-esteem terribly - something that plagued me into early adulthood. I know we are all trying to do what is best for our children and I know it feels great to have an advanced kid, and we each might have a kid that just might not have those social problems - but in my opinion & from my experience, the down side is just too big for me to risk. I now have a very advanced daughter with a Nov. birthday. She is in K & is way ahead. But she loves her friends & loves recess & still loves learning. For me - it is very gratifying to see her getting along well with her peers and I would not jeopardize that area of her learning for anything. To be successful in life, I think interpersonal skills are just as, if not more important that book learning.

I could read fluently when I started kindergarten, so my parents and the school decided I should move up to first grade in October of my kindergarten year. My birthday is in October, so I had been one of the oldest and was suddenly one of the youngest.
This was fine until I hit fourth grade. I used to think I was just stupid, because that was such a hard year for me, both socially and academically, but now I really believe I had not yet hit the maturity needed to understand certain abstract concepts--most notably, fractions and how to manipulate them. I ended up repeating fourth grade, which was a major trauma although it probably saved me socially to get away from the frustrating peer group I had been with since first grade. I had a different teacher for "fourth grade, second round," and she rescued a lot of my attitude towards school, but my confidence was completely shaken and I struggled with math through high school.
In middle school and high school I was involved in enough extra-curricular activities that age disparity did not make much difference--I was friends with people in my grade and the grade above mine.
If I could somehow advise my parents knowing what I know now, I would tell them to do lots of challenging reading with me at home so I felt confident and encouraged, but not to skip me ahead a grade. They believed they were saving me the "boredom" of reading instruction with my younger peers, but that was simply not worth the struggles and drama that came later. I think it would have been healthier (for me, at least) to continue to be at the top of the class instead of having my self-confidence take a beating socially and making me second-guess my academic abilities.
Only you can know what is right for your child, but consider your decision carefully. Is there a Montessori school near where you live? They typically offer mixed-age classes so younger children do not feel limited and aspire to do what the older children can do, and the older children can keep working towards more advanced goals while helping the younger students. In a good Montessori school, there is a wonderful community atmosphere that encourages everyone. Perhaps a year of such an environment would be intellectually exciting for your advanced child while still avoiding all the now-or-never/what-will-the-future-hold worries of starting school too soon.
My sincerest best wishes!

Well, I can tell you my school experience, but dinosaurs were roaming the earth back then.... I started school at age four (my birthday is in February); they took me because I was obviously academically ready. But when I was high school age, I was quite out of it socially. This extended through college, and I didn't really learn any social poise or comfort until I was in my (gasp!) forties. Now, this could be because I was just naturally dorky as well as extremely timid. Or it could have had something to do with not having the social maturity needed for those stages and somehow just not being able to catch up. As I look back, I wonder whether waiting a while before starting school could have helped. I could (in my imagination) have had a sort of "home school" year - lots of reading with my parents, lots of art, lots of interaction with my neighbors (who were great people). I never had any problems with academics - just with "living"! My younger son had a September birthday and we opted for him to have an extra year of kindergarten - and I think it did him good. There it is, for what it's worth, from a Grandma!

Honestly I think more kids feel out of place when they are older than their classmates. All 3 of my kids turned and started kinder in August. My boys are autistic but we didnt know at the time and were not ready. We ended up pulling them out and its considered a retention. My daughter was fine educationally but not so much socially. She had a hard time there but she is also really shy. If your son is out going and smart go for it. If he has a hard time adjusting to new people places and things I would wait.

I started kindergarten at the age of 4 and turned 5 in Nov. Luckily I was a good student so academically I did just fine. I do remember being irked that all of my classmates were able to get their driver's license way before me. However, I finished my graduate degree at 23.

My daughter is a January baby and even though she was ready for Kinder she was unable to start because she had to be 5 on or before Oct. 1 so she did an extra year of Early Childhood Ed (ECE) before she went to Kinder. It was great for her and now that she is a first grader I am glad I didn't push any farther to get her into Kinder. She is excelling and is more confident in her school and in the classroom. I spoke with a few teachers as well and if they had to choose they would choose the student being older. It would seem the younger students tend to struggle a bit even though they are keeping up with the class. I would ask the Kinder teacher for their opinion regarding academics. Your son can be tested so you and the teacher know that he is ready for Kinder or if he should wait. You know your son better than anyone so when all else fails go with that 'mommy' voice that we all seem to have inside. =) Good luck.

I was younger than all my classmates . The only thing I didn't like was having to drive later than all of them, but that was no big issue. I have heard this debate a lot lately, and had no idea so many people considered it. I went kindergarten barely turning five, and I was fine all through school. Loved school, was ready to go. Had no issues with anything. I graduated at 17, and no biggy. I don't know what the big deal is if the kid is ready

My birthday is August 21 - that ALWAYS made me the youngest in my class lol, I never felt any different from the rest of the children, in fact it never even occurred to me that I was the youngest, only that my birthday was in the holidays and I could't invite my classmates.

I did well at school, I have a podiatry degree, I was the youngest on my degree course too lol, passed with honors, didn't make an iota of difference to me.

boys are a little different - my son has a mid october, so he is one of the oldest, he matured late socially, so I am glad he is a little older than his peers

I am a September baby and started school when I was 4 going on 5. I was ready and never had problems throughout school. When we moved from CA to WA I was bored for a couple of years because I had already learned what the WA schools were teaching. It seems funny now because we have some of the worst school ratings in CA. I think if your child is ready and your pre-k teacher recommends it then you should start him now, if not then wait a year. The hardest thing I remember is my friends started driving before me. I was one of 5 kids (if I remember right) that graduated at age 17. Some of those kids were younger than me and also did fine.

perfect example is me, I started early and struggled through out school. I was younger than all my classmates, did not get licence til senior year, unable to go on senior trip as I was not 18 yet..... So with my brothers she waited the extra year and they both did great excelled, same age as friends, She wishes she would of waited for me to be be that year older and mature.

I really think you should wait, because if he is ready do pre K and then they can always bump him up a grade down the road but let him develop and dont rush him growing up.
Just my opinion. Good luck

Being one of the young kids in class, I'm not sure how to respond to your question because you say your son is "ready" for KG, but does he have all of the learning readiness? (like reading and so on?) This is the biggest determining factor. If he is academically ready and his emotions are on the right track for being in that environment then go for it! But if he's lacking in either of these, then wait one more year.
Good luck!

I have an Oct birthday, and started Kindergarten just before I turned 5. I have always excelled academically, so for that part it wasn't an issue. And for some reason I didn't care that everybody else got to drive, and date, before I did.
But looking back, I now realize how immature I was compared to the other kids in my class. Sure, I was smart, but I had lousy social skills and coping skills for disappointments and such. I never really learned how to make and maintain friends (still learning how to do that now, in my 30s) and a lot of kids regarded me as "teacher's pet" and such.

My daughter has a Sept b-day, and the cut-off in Utah is Sep 1, so she had to wait (there are no exceptions allowed, I was told). And, even though she attendended a private kindergarten, she wasn't allowed to start first grade just before she turned 6. She still had to do kindergarten. She's very academically advanced and I wasn't pleased. But now, in 5th grade, I'm glad. She had that extra year to mature (she needed it) and she does great in school and is able to make friends and get along with others.

I'd put your son in a good pre-K program (either at the school or somewhere else) and let him wait. In the long run, it doesn't hurt to be the oldest, but it can be a struggle being the youngest, especially if it's a "special case". Later on, you can look into gifted programs to keep him challenged.

I am an Oct. b-day and began Kinder at 4. Mind you this was 35 yrs ago. I was the youngest in the class and it was recommended that I be held back. I wasn't. Self-esteem was a huge issue for me, I went from an extroverted friendly child to very withdrawn in my pre-teen years. I was the youngest, smallest in the class and teased for this. Books became my escape as I was reading several grade levels above my peers. I severally lacked social skills and continued to be behind in that area throughout my education. As an adult I recognize that I lack the basic friendship making skills. Boys mature traditionally slower than girls. Puberty is tough and high school is even tougher for boys who are not physically equal as their peers. JMO

My b-day is Oct. 30, and I started at 4. I graduated with my class and finished college, so I guess academics were not a problem. I was quite shy and a late bloomer. That part was hard, but I still had plenty of friends. My son's b-day is Nov. 14, and I will wait with him, even though I feel he will be ready next fall. He's a little guy, and I think that part is just harder on boys. I was the smallest person in my class too. It has to be someone, but I think it's doubly hard for boys. I also want to give him time to catch up physically, as he is not very coordinated, and is by nature very cautious. I think the extra year will give him a bit more confidence. Good luck with whatever you decide. There is always more than one "right way."

With a late August birthday I started K when I just turned 5 and was one of the youngest in my class. I didn't really realize that I was so much younger than some classmates when I was in grade school though I did in jr/sr high school. I often felt awkward, even in grade school. I made friends, though that didn't come easily to me. I don't know if that would have changed if I had been held back a year. It is only since becoming a parent and discussing this very issue that I started to wonder if my introverted personality was enhaced by being the youngest in my class. BTW, I did well academically.

My kids both have summer birthdays and both are quite shy - slow to make friends, always needing reassurance that what they are doing in class is correct, play beside peers but not necessarily with them. My husband and I have made the decision to hold them back a year. My son will start K in the fall and I definitely think it was a good decision for him. He has made a lot of progress this year in pre-k. He initiates play with his friends more often, he is more willing to participate in class, etc. We'll see if my daughter has the same progression in pre-k next year.

Good luck with your decision.

I will answer this from a middle school teacher's perspective. While it may not make a huge difference in the early years of school, by the time they get to middle school and early high school, it is a HUGE difference- especially in boys. The boys that "mature" later have a rough time when all their friends are a foot taller, start having facial hair, have much lower voices, etc... Middle school is tough enough without having to deal with being 1-2 years physically behind.
Some of the stories I have heard (from male PE Teachers and Coaches) about what happens in the boy's locker room is also quite scary. I would definitely not want my son to be the youngest in that type of situation (if you know what I mean). ;)
Just my two cents,
R.

I started kindergarten at 4 and had a December birthday. I always did well academically and was at the top of my class, but at times felt that I was always trying to "catch up" to the other kids-- esp. the big milestones like getting my period or driver's license, etc. Although I was mature for my age and did well socially, I was also petite and a late bloomer, so I was smaller and a little behind with regards to puberty, than my peers. Puberty was probably the hardest thing, looking back. I was always self conscious at gym class and the locker room that all the girls were developing and I wasn't. It didn't help that I didn't get my period until I was 15 and I was a junior in highschool!

Also, starting University and being on my own at 17 posed a few logistical challenges, ie. not being able to open a checking account on my own, sign a lease, etc. However, all that being said, I don't regret that my mom started me early (she does) and, looking back, if I had the opportunity to wait a year, I wouldn't choose to do it.

Something you may have already considered with your son (I have 2 as well) is that MANY parents of boys are holding them back with early summer birthdays -- even birthdays in May, so with your son's late birthday in Nov., he may be almost 1 1/2 years younger than his peers. This may not be an issue now, if he is ready socially and academically, but could present issues in junior high when young boys are going through puberty. Just a thought! :)

Good luck with whatever you decide!

My birthday is in August and I was always the youngest. It never bothered me. Sure my friends could drive before me, but it wasn't a big deal. We were all just happy we could drive :)

My niece's birthday is in September and she missed the school deadline. She is now the oldest and is bored out of her mind. She is now in second grade. Her parents don't know what to do to keep her interested in school. They said she has hardly learned a thing all year.

If you can start hiim and you feel he is ready, I would do it!

Hi S.,

I was a November baby as well and started school somewhat early I suppose. I never felt like I was younger than the other kids because we were all in the same grade. To tell you the truth, when I found out a kid's age when they were older than me, I thought they had been held back, lol.

I personally don't believe in starting a child "early" but "early" is a judgment call. If your son is a mature 4 year 10 month old, he should be fine. If for some reason they have to hold him back at any point, is it really a big deal? Grades and times are all relative. The important point is that he gets an education and graduates with what he needs to know.

Regards,

M.

I personally enjoyed being a little younger than everyone else. I was treated like a cute little girl who was small and sweet. I did well academically. And although I wasn't popular, I wasn't a total loser either. I have a late July birthday so I was barely five when I started kindergarten. I remember making friends and having a fun time.

My daughter has an early august birthday and I want to put her in kindergarten when she has just barely turned 5. I believe she will be just fine. She is extremely smart and gets bored if I don't have anything to entertai her.

My son has a late August birthday. And I'm torn. I thought I wanted to put him in kindergarten right after turning five but I'm not sure if he will be ready. I think one year can make a huge difference. He is going to be tall and slim like his daddy. I think if I waited until he was 6 he would be too old physically and mentally.

My husband was homeschooled until 4th grade. I think it was the reason he had a hard time socially but excelled academically. He has a late October birthday and he graduated at 18 and turned 19 that fall.

I graduated at 17 and didn't turn 18 until that summer, right before starting college. I was behind getting my license then my peers. I couldn't drive or date until my junior year. I started an afterschool job at 15. Which turned out to be bad.

I had a boy cousin who has a birthday the same time as mine and my aunt held him back a year. It was difficult on our friendship being a year apart. I think he should have been in my grade.

I think it benefits girls to be on the younger side and boys on the older side. But then the gap between their ages in the same grade is larger.

It's a tough decision. I think you could always start him and then pull him out if you need too. Made give him another year in preschool.

I am a mid-September birthday. I am so happy I started school at 4. I was always able to keep up with my peers socially and surpassed many of them academically. Often I was placed in higher-grade classrooms for reading/English period. I participated in a "gifted and talented" program and a pilot integrated math program. I also earned many credits in AP courses in high school such that I didn't have to take a lot of classes in college.

I had a few really great friends and lots of acquaintances. I went to dances and football games and participated in clubs and extra-curricular activities including Drama (I later became a manager at a live theatre as my profession). In fact, high school is when I realized how fortunate I was to be put in "early" because to me the students in the lower grade were too immature.

I think the main thing to consider is your individual child. I had it great, but as you can see from other answers, it isn't the right choice for everyone. Parents should take a good, hard look at their child's ability to adjust to new situations, take in new ideas and interact with others. You will know the right thing to do.

And in your specific case, 2 months doesn't seem to be much of a difference. So if your son were born two months earlier and was 5 already then there will be no regrets? Just something to think about.

If your son is ready, I would start him. My sister was young, as were several of my friends (all born Oct-Nov) and they all did fine. You know your son best and whether he is mature enough to handle the responsibilities of kindergarten.

I would definitely put him in. I don't think he'll feel out of place at all. Maybe when he's 16 and is the last to get his driver license, but that's it!

I was a "young" kid in my class. I did really well academically - and never struggled. I also did fine socially. HOWEVER, I don't think you have anything to lose by holding him back - or sticking to the date of the school cut off. My daughter will miss the cut off by 24 days, and I am happy to have her be "older". I too have talked to many folks and read a lot about this. There are many early starters with no regrets, but there are a fair amount with them. I have yet to find anyone who regretted letting their child be older. In fact, it seems more the trend lately - some parents actually holding a child back... to be a bit older even if they meet the school cut off date. Even with my positive experience, when it comes to my kids, I'm letting them be "older" no rush to hurry through. There are plenty of activities and challenges we can provide them intellectually, and give them the time to develop emotionally and socially to become secure well adjusted individuals. Good luck!

I was always one of the youngest, and it was totally fine for me. However, I was talking to my brother in law about my nephew, and I was saying that he must be pretty popular in HS (cute, tall, smart, funny, football player) and my BIL actually said that it had been really hard for my nephew to make friends. He also was one of the youngest in his grade, and up through sophomore year was just a little immature so it was hard for him to maintain a close group of friends. So even though he had a lot of stuff going for him, being a younger boy really did hold him back socially up until about junior year of high school. Hope this was helpful. Good luck with your decision.

I had a somewhat different experience. My birthday is in March, but I skipped second grade. So I was always (by far) one of the youngest in my class. I personally had no problem with it. In fact, I kind of liked it.

However, my mother has since told me that she regrets letting me skip. She feels that my being in the same class as kids who were as much as 16 months older than me was a bad influence, that I would want to do things that she didn't feel I was old enough for. She never elaborated what she meant by this, but my parents were, in my opinion, inordinately strict. Again, I never felt it was a problem, but it depends on your son and your parenting style.

Another thing to consider is that your decision to start him now or later will affect how many years you get to/have to have him in your home. Once he finishes high school, he may move away to go to college or get a job. I've heard it put this way: "Do you want to give your child an extra year of childhood or adulthood?" For me, being able to leave home at 17 rather than 18 was a huge benefit. Even though it saved my parents a whole year of paying for my room and board, they perhaps did not see it in quite a positive light.

All that being said, I have a son who is a November baby. He is already showing signs that he is likely to be academically advanced for his age. Even so, I plan to wait until he is five going on six to start him in kindergarten. I feel that he can benefit from the extra year to gain some emotional and social maturity. Also, he is a little on the short side, and I think having another year to physically grow will also benefit him in the long run.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

I was young for my class. I made the cut-off by four days. I was a very good student and athlete, so being younger was not an issue that way. It wasn't a problem socially either. One great thing I always joked about is that all of his friends will get their driver's licenses first, so he won't have to get carted around by his parents as long! I also loved college and couldn't settle on just one major, so I was able to stay for five years, have two majors and still be a "normal"-aged college graduate.

I graduated at 17 only issue was puberty(I felt slow e en though was right on age level) and driving. Junior high years are hardest on both sexes. If he's ready socially as well as mentally go ahead but be flexible for future change.

9th grade daughter has guy friend with August birthday who was held back that jst skiped 8th grade so he could be with his true age group -- however this boy IS extremely smart and VERY mature for his age so he's doing fine.

Be preparedto maybe change late elementary school - before junior high hits if you see any social issues coming. And if late boy puberty runs in family, for his junior high years I'd maybe think about holding him back.

My parents had me moved up a year into second grade when I was in first. Even though I was academically top of my class all the way through graduate school, I now look back and realize that so many social challenges arose from being young. I was the last one picked for the kickball team every time. And I now know that some of my more painful early professional experiences stemmed from emotional immaturity...we also know now that executive function isn't mature until the early to mid twenties. I am starting all my kids as late as possible as a result. For me, academic readiness is not at all the point -- I could have done the work for two or three grades ahead. The physical and emotional readiness are much more important, relative to peers.

I don't know that I was early, but I turned 5 right before I started kindergarten as did my brother. I never had a single issue nor did my brother. Now I had a best friend in middle school that was a year behind me because her mother kept her back a year (her teachers said she wasn't emotionally mature enough to move on to first grade). It bothered her so much that she was always a grade behind the people her age. She always felt it was because she was stupid and thus she didn't try very hard.

I graduated from highschool with girls that were two years younger than myself and they got along great. My brother was always more comfortable with kids older than himself. He always learned to do everything sooner than the typical child because he rose to the challenge we all presented for him.

I think you know your child and what they are capable of handling. I also think if you set your expectations low or express concern about his abilities, then that will affect him more than letting him give it a go.

My husband was the youngest in his class all throughout school- he got picked on a lot, not for being younger necessarily but for being smaller than most of the guys in his class. He is very smart so had no problems academically.

My son's b-day is also near the cutoff, but he was socially academically ready for kindergarten, and since he is always been 90+ percentile for height we went ahead and put him in kinder. His pediatrician predicts he will be over six feet tall. He is doing fine in kinder thus far.

My parents skipped me ahead a grade, and I think I may have been a bit socially immature for it, but my parents also moved several times while I was in school so that probably contributed to my having very few close friends as well. The thing I really hated was not being able to drive till a year after everyone in my grade.

I graduated a year early for my age & had ups & downs being younger than everyone else. As Melissa G said, I was more immature & "sheltered" compared to the other children.
Pros -
~I had more self respect knowing that I was ahead of the game & it motivated me to stay ahead.
~All of my friends were obviously much older so I had the opportunity to learn from their mistakes(not that I didn't make any myself)

Cons -
~Teens seem to dive into college right after high school, at 17 I had no idea what I wanted to do with myself so I put off college. This may actually be more of a pro considering I waited to attend school until I was 20 & knew I was doing the right thing. If I had gone right away it would have been a waste of money.

As far as being teased is concerned, I would not worry because no matter how perfect your child is he/she will be bullied at some point for one thing or another. I hope this was some kind of help.

I have a few examples I can share and must say I really think that having kids start when they should is the best choice.

My dad, my girlfriend and another friend's two kids all started kindergarten early, in addition my aunt and a teacher friend of mine both skipped a grade. Every one of them say the exact same thing and that is they wish they had stayed with their age group. The general input was they were of course fine academically but always felt a social struggle that they still hang on to as adults. Even though it seems like only a year, there really is a difference in how these kids think and act. My friends kids who started early (one is 10, January birthday and one is 7, October birthday), both are so painfully shy, they have no friends and will barely look at you. Now that is not to say they wouldn't be shy anyways, you just wonder if they feel like my dad, aunt and friends and simply feel out of place.

All that being said, it is such a gift to excel academically naturally. How nice it will be for your son to breeze through that part of life (even if he is in accelerated classes and such). Lucky for you, the schools now days work very hard to challenge these kids. There are programs they will put them in even magnet schools he can attend that cater to the highly proficient (best of all they are free because they are public). I would feel fully confident in letting your son start when he is supposed to, he will do great. Let him be a kid for one more year, believe me he won't lose his gift or be held down because if it.

Good luck!

I'm a Nov baby and went to school at age 4, my hubby is an Oct baby and started school at 5. If your son is ready start him at 4. Sure I got some teasing for being young but I probably would have been teased for being old...kids get teased. My hubby says that him & the other guys that were older in his class tended to get into the most mischief. They were bored and knew WAY more than the rest especially in High School is where he saw the biggest difference. I never had any problems. YOU know your child best, go with your gut feeling :) Best of luck!

I started kindergarten when I was 4, not turning 5 until late February. Did very well academically. Earned an Associates degree when I was still 18.
However, I never felt that I fit in socially. I did not appear younger physically and "developed" at the same age as the other girls if not earlier. I'm not sure starting school younger had anything to do with my social awkwardness and until I say anything they would never know I'm any different. In my late teens and early 20's I suffered from panic attacks and I'm now in my late 30's and was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a few years ago.

First I assume you've checked to see if the school will even let him start. Our school district will not allow them to start Kindergarten early, they can be moved ahead the next year, but have to wait until they are actually 5 to start kindergarten. My oldest son is an August birthday so he turned 5 right before school started. He is just finishing 6th grade and has done fine so far. I have had a few parents tell me their kids are picked on because size wise they are smaller than the other kids in their class. So how big he is might be something you want to think about. Also I would look at your son's social development as well as his academics. Can he sit still and listen? Does he have friends? Sometime the social aspects of being younger are harder on the kids than the academic stuff. Anyway only you can determine what to do so good luck with your decision.

Hi,

I can say that we started our daughter in K this year she was the legal age by Sept 1st. However her birthday is August 26th. I wish now that we had waited an extra year for her to develop that much more emotionally. Educationally she is fine but I can see that she is a bit more immature than her other classmates. It is a tough decision to make. Good luck!

My advice is to wait, Let your son be one of the oldest in the class rather than the youngest. My 1st son has a birthday the end of October, He had to wait and thank goodness. He is bright has an advantage in class where he does not have to work as hard for the grades. In middle school little boys have a HARD time growing socially and being older sure does help. I have 3 more kids after him and each and every one of them especially my August baby I so wish I would have waited a year to start them in school.
I am a late June baby and fought and struggled each and every year both with grades and social development. WAIT A YEAR. I truly think it is something that will matter in 20 years from now.