Question for ADHD Moms. What Do You Do? Do You See This?

I have a good friend that works with kids with just slight ADHD to full blown asbergers. She usually has great ways to help keep kids focused. I will ask her if she has any tips and message you. :)

Also, before you medicate look at this line of products. I think the OPC3 will help her. I know a pedatrician that has his patients on this line. He wants to get all kids off meds if possible. The OPC3 will help her focus. It's about 77 cents a day.
:)
http://bit.ly/oC5s7p
http://bit.ly/oC5s7p

My dtr is 8 has ADHD as well and is very much like yours. It's like she controls her emotions all day and then as soon as she is home, it's all let loose. She is comfortable at home and knows she is in a place that is safe and she is loved unconditionally. At school she is reserved, so much so the teachers have commented to me that she seems so expressionless and always on gaurd. They have actually been trying to get her to drop her gaurd some. However, unlike yours, my dtr is on medication which has helped her to focus. Before the meds, she was incapable of focusing at all. By the time school lets out though, the meds have worn off. I've since had to have the dr authorize an afternoon dosage for her. Without it she is completely off the wall. More so than your daughter. I agree with Liv B. when she says that kids with ADHD can focus in school but not out of it. My dtr wants very much to be like her peers so she trys very hard during school "to fit in". By the time she comes home, she is exhausted and as I have said, releases all that energy that she has bottled up from all day. So yes, kids with ADHD can do this. If you aren't againist medication, maybe try a small dosage of something in the afternoon as soon as she gets home from school. I'm not trying to push it but that's just an idea. It took us a long time to go for the meds. We fought it for a long time but we finally had to do it and for us, it was a Godsend. It has made a huge improvement along with behavior modification. Good luck and hang in there!

Are you sure that you are not talking about my daughter??? Your daughter sounds like a typical ADHD girl, hold it together at school and then explode at home. By the time she gets home she just can't keep it together anymore.

A good book is girls with ADHD.

Try having her jump on a trampoline while she is learning to spell. For example, have her jump for each letter. Jump while saying P, Jump while saying I, Jump while saying N, Jump while saying PIN! Do it again and again. do not expect her to pay attention for long periods of time, read for just a few minutes at a time. Talk to the teacher about having her homework modified. She is probably overwhelmed by all the words on the page. Try using a colored, transparent strip over the sentence she is reading. you can get them at parent teacher stores. This will help her focus on the words that she is reading this will help her focus and prevent her from becoming so overwhelmed by all those words.

I just want to add, In reference to the mothers who responded by saying they have not met a child with ADHD who can make it through the school day, It is typical for a girl with ADHD to hold it together during school because girls are very concerned about what their peers will think of them, this peer pressure helps them keep it together, then they explode when the get home in a comfortable environment. My daughter held it together at school, but could not sit still at home, I once asked her how she stayed still at school and she told me she wiggled her feet under her desk and moved her fingers under her desk so the teacher wouldn't see.

Typical ADHD - remember that their worst time to function, anyone's worst time to function, is in the evenings. Unstructured environments are the worst for them, and home is when she likely knows that she gets "free time" and is more likely to fight the structure of homework. Try having her sit on an exercise ball, they make sensory chairs like that for kids, and then have her do her words. Or, this might sound silly, but get a really big box, fill it up with rice or some other textured thing, and sit her in there and have her read - I swear it helps. You can consider meds, while she might not be hyper and the teacher might not be seeing it, she might also not be paying any attention. Those kids typically get caught later and therefore lose out on more. We medicated my little one (not sure if you remember me) because he was the inattentive type and OMG the difference is amazing!!!

Sounds like a learning disability like dyslexia, or a visual processing disorder or sensory integration problem. These disorders often go hand-in-hand with ADD and ADHD. I'm no expert, but based on what I've read, the scenario described really sounds like a child with a visual processing disconnect and it is causing her difficulting in reading.

I suggest reading up on on the topic and go get another assessment done. Based on what you read and find out, you'll be able to better ask the right questions and perhaps can better explain the difficulties you're facing so you can get a more complete diagnosis.

Here are some links to help with your search for information:

http://www.adhd.com.au/Visual_Processing_Disorders.htm
http://www.ldonline.org/article/6390
http://www.ncld.org/ld-basics/related-issues/information-...
http://www.ehow.com/about_###-###-####_processing-disorde...

For teaching and study techniques (right brain therapy) to help with visual processessing and other disorders see: www.dianecraft.org

I have yet to meet a child with ADHD that can make it through a school day.

That's interesting she hyperfocuses at school. Usually ADHD is horrendous at school. I'd say it could be a misdiagnosis since there's no trouble at school, but the way you're explaining it sounds like hyperfocusing. The fact that school isn't a problem is a huge blessing.

Have you talked to the specialist who diagnosed her for guidance? It may be that a simple small dosage of Ritalin or other short-acting med can get her through homework. Our son is on Concerta during the day but it konks out in the afternoon and we give a booster of Ritalin so he can get through homework. Otherwise, he's just like your daughter and it's a lost cause.

If you're completely against medication, you might try very active physical activity just before homework, such a long bike ride, time on a trampoline or a jog around the block. That can give you a small window of time to get the homework done with some success.

Good luck! I hope you find a solution that's just right for her.

how old is your daughter? what grade is she in? My son was off the charts adhd. but it depends on the age level as to what is appropriate.

Something to consider - even kids without ADHD can have trouble staying focused for homework. You don't say how old your daughter is, but based on the lessons you describe, she sounds young. What is the homework expectation at her school? If she is being assigned too much for a child her age, or if the homework feels like busy work instead of meaningful learning time, you need to address that with her teacher. If that is the case, the problem is not entirely your daughter. A bright child recognizes busy work when she sees it, and is likely to avoid engaging because she's just plain not interested.

While I do not have an ADHD child, I have two very high energy children who are often thoroughly sick of being still and paying attention by the end of a school day. I find that homework goes better if we do it after an hour of outside, running, loud free time. And in my daughter's case, we often practice things like spelling or multiplication or other drill-type lessons while moving - dancing, jumping rope, bouncing a ball. Doing something physical and rhythmic helps her focus. It might help your daughter, too.

I cant tell you one way or the other but I can give you my experience. My ADHD daughter had exactly the same issue. I found that the chemicals in the house were messing with her neurological system. I had worked and worked with her but she was still reading simple words at age 7. When I detoxed my home, I had her on grade level reading within 8 weeks...yes eight! The household chemicals, as well as the bath and body products, were contraindicating with each other. It only takes two, yes two, to mess things up and she was my little helper cleaning around the house all the time.

Nutrition and the lack of synthetic chemicals will do wonders for a child. This should at least get you to a baseline so you can determine what you need to do next.

Hope this helps!

M.

Hahahaha... YES. Soooo totally normal.

What I found worked the best for my son was the Charlotte Mason practice of "narrating". Which means to either repeat back in your own words, write, draw, act out, etc (my son's a performer, he acted things out... other kids are more visual, auditory, etc.) what you've just read.

With my son we started of LITERALLY sentence by sentence. Then moved onto paragraph by paragraph, then scene by scene, then chapter by chapter over the course of several months. Here's more on it:

Narration

When you ask a child to narrate, you’re asking him to tell back in his own words what he just saw, heard, or read. The narration can be oral or written or drawn — whatever. Because the child must think through the information and determine how to present it, mixed with his own opinion and impressions, this method of evaluation requires a much higher thinking level than mere fill-in-the-blank or answer-the-posed-question-with-a-fact methods. When requesting a child to narrate, word the question in an open, essay-type form, such as “Tell all you know about _____” or “Describe _____.”
If a book you’re using gives a list of Discussion Questions, first ask the child to tell you all he knows about what was just read, then use only selected questions to cover any information he omitted.
(See more ideas for narration.)
http://simplycharlottemason.com/timesavers/narration/

From being ADHD, I can absolutely promise you, that once the anxiety level gets kicked up... one can't even SEE the letters anymore. Everything just kind of swirls together (ever try to read in a dream, it's like that), and it's frustrating and embarassing, which makes it even HARDER. Vicious cycle. Making it fun, though, and not time sensitive is pretty key. If she's still early reading DO check out www.starfall.com. The interactive nature ROCKS for a lot of adhd kids.

((BTW...I was like your daughter and hyperfocused in school... until the 5th grade, and things got very very very boring for a few years / puberty struck. Ugh.))

If you're considering medicating for HW... you might try OTC stuff instead, since it's short lived and you can take or not as needed. SPECIFICALLY: A can of Mtn Dew, Coke, a mocha or latte. Enough caffeine to take the edge off and allow for concentration and calming down, without having to completely rework your lives around meds.

I think that since she is able to focus at school and do the work she is presented with I would ask the teacher to please let her do the homework at school. She can stay in from recess if needed to complete it. School hours are working for her so I can't see why the teacher can't help out here.

Hi there. My daughter is 7 1/2 and also has ADD. Like your little girl, my daughter is not on meds and is really doing well in school, but oh man... once she gets home its a whole different ballgame! We have been lucky (?) enough to be seeing a counselor for a different issue, but she said that ADD kids may be able to hold it together with appropriate behavior all day at school, but just cannot hold it anymore once they get home. My younger daughter has sensory issues, and we have seen the same thing. We break the 2nd graders homework into very tiny chunks. Seriously, like 10 minutes at a time. Then she has a break for 15-20 minutes and then we get back at it. It does take a LONG time to get homework done, but it does happen. We still deal with meltdowns occasionally, especially if she is struggling with one particular piece of homework, but it seems to be getting better. Best of luck to you!

If it's reading, try asking her if she knows the definition of the word she's looking at. My daughter will often be "dumb" when we're doing language arts. It's like she has NO IDEA what's going on. Finally I'll ask her "do you know what a 'pin' is? 100% off the time she'll say "No" and then once I define the word or show her a picture she can do it.

For 20 mintues she couldn't do part of her language arts work. She kept getting stuck on one question and then couldn't do any of the rest of the work. I found out later on that she didn't understand what "sifting" was. Once we defined it and I showed her she did the rest of it FINE!

I also will have her sound out words and then 2 seconds later she can't remember ANYTHING. Usually it's because she doesn't know what the word means.

So if it's language arts, check the words. She may have a wrong definition, an incomplete definition or no definition. That solves 80% of our issues.

Proper rest, good nutrition and detox seem to help the rest.

Good luck!

Get her assessed by a behavioral optometrist to check her vision. She can have perfect acuity (ability to focus), but still have significant problems moving her eyes together easily.

Try doing more active activities with pre-reading. I throw sight word and phonics cards all over the house and have my kids chase them down. Orally reciting things while hopping can help too.

Good luck.

My friend gives her ADHD daughter a small cup of coffee and it helps her to focus--go figure.

Sounds as if she is PLAYING you. Kids these days, even little ones are over loaded with school work and homework. Her behavior at home sounds as if she is tired NOT ADHD and in need of meds.
To all MOMS meds are not always the solution nor are Special Education/Learning style titles/labels you place on your child.

My neighbor also thought her 5 year old was ADHD because she rolls on the floor after school and has trouble maintaining attention on homework---she is 5 and in kindergarten why does she have homework, yet has no problem maintaining focus in school??

Educational styles differ per indivdual---labels hamper more than help. ADHD kids literally bounce off walls---and the instance is much rarer than most believe.
Also for consdieration: personally I could not read until a tutor sat 1 on 1 with me every other day the summer between 2nd and 3rd grade---but this was back in the 60's when labels did not exist. Once I learned how to read I read, read and read! I also acquired 2 advanced graduate degrees plus.
Hence if labels existed back then, I may not have graduated HS, and I may have learned to depend on a pill to be able maintain focus. Instead I wqs able to grow and learn naturally with the help of a tutor and succeed without the assistance of a pill.
Were my grades all A's and B's, of course not especially in the subjects I didn;t like. Were my grades an accurate calculation of intelligence--of course not, yet they were an accurate account of my boredom in this subject and my attentive focus in another that I personally found more interesting.
Was I ADD no, was I ADHD no, I WAS A KID LEARNING!!!!!!!! AND I THANK GOODNESS THAT THERE WERE NO LABEL BACK THEN FOR LABELS DO MORE HARM THAN GOOD!!!!!!!

My kids don't have ADHD but they all do this or did at one time. It was more of an age and immaturity problem. I was extremely patient with them (or I tried to be...LOL) and repeated it as if it was my first time teaching them. Eventually, they got it and eventually they did outgrow this. Keep doing what you're doing. She'll get the hang of it eventually, I promise! =) Hang in there with her.

I think it's very individual. We've got to find a tool box that works for each of our kids / ourselves individually.

For example: My four year old can focus more easily if there is music in the background. My three year old looses focus if there is music in the background. My four year old can focus better in the morning. My three year old in the afternoon. Me at 12:00am. My three year old learns from hands on activity. My four year old digs repetition, story telling, and song. I learn from conversation and question asking. I have to have caffeine to function. My husband gets spun out on my doses, but focuses well with small doses (black tea instead of french press). I learn best when I'm in a group setting, preferably from diverse backgrounds. Others learn best individually.

I find that if I give something to my three year old to fiddle with she is able to give me her full attention. My four year old will get completely involved with *anything* she is touching. It becomes her medium. Fiddling helps me listen but I can't talk and fiddle. I find it helpful to read several things at once. Right now I have four browser tabs open and I flip back and forth between them. My four year old needs to self direct. My three year old appreciates direction.

Some kids need time to unwind straight after school. Others need to stay in school mode while doing school work (I'm this way). Some need a LOT of outside play time (both mine are this way). Others need to rest their brain indoors.

Hello, l am a mother of three and my oldest son is five and a half and has ADHD. Let me just start off by saying I totally understand how hard it is to have a child with This disorder. My son was way out of control and all over the place and his behavior was so bad that we ended up putting him on meds. we still have issues that we have to deal with on a day to day basis but I am so glad that we ended up putting him on meds because he is a lot better! I also pit him on meds. Because I wanted him to be able to sit still in class so he can learn. We have the same problem at home when we have to do home work. He gets really frustrated and doesn't want to take the time to do it. I just tell him that this is part of school and that u will always have homework and that homework helps us to learn more. We r usually able to get it done but he doesn't ever really have that much homework because he is just in kindergarten. I would talk to the dr. About how it is hard for her to sit still and focus on her homework and see they say. My son's parent teacher conferences are coming up so we shall see how my guy is doing in school in a couple of weeks. Good luck with everything and hang in there. A lot of children out grow this! Hopefully our children will! God Bless you and your family!

My daughter has inattentive ADD and dyslexia and what you describe sounds more like dyslexia than ADD or ADHD. I would make sure you get her evaluated by a neuro-psychologist who can explain her learning profile to you so you know how she should be taught. Our daughter is finally on an IEP and has reduced homework since we had the same melt downs. Also, since my style worked well with school (very left brain and linear thinking and organized) the way I wanted to "help" her did not work for her AT ALL. She now does spelling words with daddy who is much more like her (very creative) and they are pretending to be robots that dance while chanting d-a-n-c-e, and they pretend sing while spelling s-i-n-g-i-n-g, etc. There is a great book called "Unicorns are real, a right-brained approach to learning" that has lots of practical advise about how to help kids learn that are on this creative end of the spectrum and need to be taught differently to get it. However, since you say the teacher does not see the ADHD behavior and she is doing well in school, she may not have ADHD or dyslexia at all, but may just be fed up after 6 hours of learning and want to have some down time. I would get a professional assessment, and do not just rely on the school assessment either. They told us our daughter had an anxiety disorder, go figure.

Personally,I have never met an ADHD child (including my own) who can
get thru a day at school. Are you sure she is ADHD? She just does not
sound like it. What does her teacher think. Who evaluated her? I have
more questions than answers.