Putting the Toothpaste Back in the Tube

Frankly, this is her choice--to leave the group.
IF she was open to the whole group about her financial situation, then the group could have drawn their own conclusions as to why she missed the meeting.
I guess better to keep comments vague like "Yes, I know they have a lot going on right now...." instead of specific comments about anyone else's financial situation--which may or may not have been the cause of her stress on that particular day.

If this is truly something that she has shared to the entire group as a whole, then you were not out of line. But if she had NOT shared it with everyone in the group then you overstepped the bounds of privacy.
I think that she has a lot of things that are adding stress and unpleasantness to her day and she just strikes out at others as a way of "letting off steam". I don't know that there is anything you can do to fix this....or whether it is worth your time to give it a try. Either way, I would do NOTHING for a while...let her calm down. I would ask for prayer at the group for "unspoken needs"...without saying ANYTHING else about what it is for or who it is for. The ladies don't need to know the details of who they are praying for....HE knows!!!
You say that this is a pattern that she has demonstrated in the past, so evidentally she doesn't do well with dealing one on one with "situations".
Use this as a learning experience for yourself and be more careful about what you share about others.

I think there's a lot going on in her life. She's just overwhelmed and oversensitive. My hubby become snappy too in this kind of economic condition. While before it's a discussion, now it can be a heated argument.
Just continue praying...

She is a "toxic" friend and you are MUCH better off without her. Read your post back to yourself...if everything that you have said about her doesn't make you relieved that she is not in your life any more you might need to see someone yourself. You need to value yourself enough to realize that you did NO wrong and it is all her doing. You have been nothing but a friend to her. You have let her walk all over you-she is not a true friend to you or anyone. Count your blessings that she is gone.

sometimes people just get offended, and you can't always predict and avoid it. it doesn't sound to me as if you did anything wrong, or anything you could have done to avert the drama.
some people are truly addicted to drama (usually the ones who yell the loudest 'i hate drama! this is a no-drama zone!!') and need the adrenaline it creates to distract them from their real problems. it sounds as if she may be one of these.
i appreciate your desire to work through problems and not cut people off, but bear in mind you can only offer that from your end. if you are behaving in a framework that lines up with your own ethical code, you are open to receiving friendship from her again, and have offered what white flags you can, rest assured that the ball's in her court now and move on. if and when she cools down and wants to talk, great! if she has added you to her list of 'cuts', well, nothing you can do about it. wish her well and enjoy your mutual friends without her presence.
khairete
S.

If she already told the group she was having financial difficulty I don't see where you are in the wrong, especially when you asked everyone to say a special prayer. Her reaction probably has nothing to do with you , she was probably in a bad place at the moment she heard you mentioned her home parties and she is building on that. When people are stressed they perceive things skewed. I've had that experience myself. You've sent her a note, you've stepped out of the club (which I don't think you should deny yourself going to) and if she is a "cutter" you won't be able to change her cutting you out of her life. But maybe just maybe given the space she will forgive whatever she feels you did to her. Sounds like she's got a lot on her plate, finances, 5 kids and a husband can make the most agreeable person very disagreeable. Give her time if it doesn't change, you just need to move past her and continue with your group.

Hi S.,
Sometimes, it feels different to bring up and talk about your own problems vs. having them brought up when you are not around.

I am not saying you were wrong, she sounds like she can be pretty volatile anyway.

Sounds like you have become a target for her frustrations :(
t

She may be a drama queen but she is right about you spilling personal information. She obviously didn't want to share that with the group and is hurt. If you want this person in your life, try calling and apologizing. If not, some people were not meant for the long haul.

You know I took myself off of facebook for a few days because of some negative people and their stupid comments got to me. My brother said thats silly just ignore them and don't let them dictate your life. He was right because I have friends out of the country with children and its easy to see their beautiful little faces on facebook. The point is don't let this so called friend give you any more worries, live your own life and be happy. You sound like a nice person and you were only trying to be good to her. Us women worry way toooooooooooooo much. Have a great day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was not up to you to share her personal finances with the group...you crossed a boundary with that one and it appears you don't realize there is anything wrong with that. If she doesn't want to be friends with you because you did what you did, then that is her choice. It is not up to you. You can apologize and talk to her about it, but ultimately the decision is hers. Talking about someone when they are not around and making judgements about their life or situation isn't exactly a desirable trait to have as a friend, however I would not let it cause a rift in the group or bring anyone else into the situation. This is a boundary issue, and I am not sure what kind of boundaries you have in place, but maybe you should reflect on that and maybe make some changes with how you respond to and the relationships that you have with others. I know this is difficult to do and not many people can look at themselves and make these kind of changes. Good luck to you!

She may have just been waiting to cut you off and this just happened to be the right time in her eyes. I don't feel you did anything wrong or hurtful. Some friendships are just not ment to be. Try not to take it personal. If you apologized and she didn't accept it, so be it. Let it go and try to move on. It's probably best for you regardless. I wouldn't personally quit your other groups because of her.