Okay My son is in preschool again this year. He will be 5 Dec. 22nd, and wasn't able to go to kindergarden, b/c the cut off date for our district is Dec. 1st. He is one of the oldest kids in the school. Now there is this one little boy who just turned 3 at the end of Sept. He picks on my son A LOT. And my son puts up with it b/c we always told him not to pick on people. He has tried over and over to tell the teacher when this little boy picks on him (which is sometimes physical) but all the teacher tells my son is that it was an accident. We are a co op preschool, so every parent has their jobs, well this little boys mom is the room rep, so any problems we have we are supposed to talk to her about. Now that doesn't help me at all b/c she is one of those moms, that always has an excuse for her childs behavior. I have seen her blame other kids for her son hitting them when all they were doing was sitting there. I don't know how to go about fixing this. Any advice would be great! Thanks!!
Okay, so on thurs. it was my day to help out in the classroom. I told his teacher that I had figured out why he had been acting different in school, and that it was b/c of that boy. she said that I wasn't the first mom to complain about him. while I was there he hit my son in the head with one of those big wooden building blocks (whick it was so hard to keep my cool, knowing that the boy was hurting my son), so, when that childs mom came to pick him up, the teacher had a talk with her. the mom said her son is acting this way b/c he is on steroids from having the croup. If that is the case, then why is he in school in the first place? Maybe they should keep him out until his meds are done!!! I told the teacher that my son is on steroids also for his asthma, and he doesn't lash out like that. I know that meds affect everyone differntly, but if he is having violent outburst, then maybe they need to keep him out until it's better. I'm glad they talked to his mother, and I'm going to send him back on Tues. to see how it goes, but I told the teacher that if it continues, then I'm pulling him out. That also makes me mad b/c he will have to leave his freinds. All I now is they need to figure out something, b/c this kid is going to eventually hurt the wrong child, and their parent is going to take it to the extreme!!
My advice to you would to go to the director of the preschool with the problem, so that he/she is aware of the sitution, since the child involved is the room rep son, it should be easier on the both of you when having a meeting.
That is sad to hear! If there is someone above her that runs the place, I would talk to him/her about the situation. Your son does not need that at all. He is trying to learn and behave. Unlike some kids, where there parent's think that they are perfect little angels. What that mother is doing is wrong, and she knows it. It sounds like the only way you will get this resolved is by finding another preschool, or by talking to the owner of the palce. If it is her, then you and your husband need to sit down with her and let her know that you are not going to settel for this. If it get's to be too bad, then you might want to look into getting some help from the state about this situation. I don't know if they would be able to help, but they might. I really hope things change for you guys. He doesn't need to be picked on like that. Keep up the good job you are doing with your son. You taught him right, not to pick on others. Please keep us posted with the changes or if you have any more questions. Take care!
If it bothers you and your son ask if you could meet with the boy and his parents so the children can talk out things out. While the parents mediate. Thats what I would do, I am looking for a preschool for my three year old could you recommend me please.
What if you set up a video camera up in the corner of the room just to have a record of your child's day. And if things come up with that child you can use it to point out what his mother or the director is not seeing.
And maybe you can encourage your son to just stay away from the problem child, like on the opposite side of the room.
Good Luck
Hi D.,
My heart breaks for you. I think that watching our kids go through hurtful times is rough. Obviously you have to act, for the sake of your childs self esteem. I would go to the teacher and be very blunt. I would go to the board if that didn't work, or even just put him in a new preschool and then right a letter to the board. There are going to be bullys in every school (although I think preschool is very early for this)and as a former teacher it IS the teachers responsibility to stop it. Good for you for teaching your child well. shame on the teacher for not protecting the little minds and esteem of ALL the students.
good luck,
R.
Hi D.-
I too belong to a co op preschool...I'm sure your school consists of a board made up of parents-I would go straight to the President. Tell him your concerns about approaching the mom because she is not only the room rep., but because she is defensive about her childs behavior. Also let the he/she know you have approached the teacher and the issue still has been blown off as "childs play" I would let the board president know you are considering pulling your child and placing him and your other child in another preschool. He/she will hopefully go to the parent and teacher and rectify the problem. Co-ops rely strongly on referrals for future enrollment- Co-oping should be fun for everyone involved and if this is making things stressful for you and more importantly your child then it's not worth it.
Hope this helps! and if you live in the area I can give you the name of my preschool- I just joined this year and we love it!
Best of luck-
K.
Some school districts offer preschool programs based on age through their community education, so you might want to check into that. I would approach the teacher and tell her that you have something you would like to discuss with her rather than the room rep.
do you have the oprtion to put him in a pre-Kindergarden program????? My son will be 5 oct 21st and after 2 yrs of preschool this is PERFECT for him......
unfortunately from what you wrote its notlooking like a win win situation at school.....
Ask again why they can't put him in an early 5 kidergarden program. If they cannot then talk to the teacher about the situation and make sure the other mothers are there to tell her about the situation that is happening. I have had problems like this before where I ended up going to the board about it and the situation was taken care of. The more complaints about the child, the more action will be taken and the mother will eventually lose her position. Try catching it on camera if necessary. Great thing about digital cameras that are small enough to hide.
I'm surprised they even HAVE a 3 and 5 year old in the same preschool? that seems odd to me. Every preschool program we've ever gone through they wouldn't be together, maybe 4/5's, but there is a HUGE difference both mentally and physically between 3 and 5, I would have to wonder what he's even gaining from that class. Where abouts are you? maybe try the school district, see if there is a pre-kindergarten program available...look into other preschools, etc...
Good luck!!
D.,
This does sound like it is a problem. It seems as though you have taught your son well by not allowing him to pick on others. However it seems that not only has the other mother not taught her son this, she also makes excuses for his actions. By talking to the teacher she should do something in order to have your child's best interest in mind, as well as all of the other children. Since she has not done anything I would step it up and talk to the director. Maybe your son can be switched to a different class or maybe they can give that mother a different job. It sounds like it is not just your son that is being effected so it may be necessary in order to protect and teach all of the other children. This problem is fixable by the teacher but maybe the teacher is uncomfortable since the mother is in the room. Just a thought. I would continue to work on the issue, even if it means talking to the director. I hope this all ends up working out. Good luck
