Potty Training - Suggestions for "Making It Come Out!"

Updated on April 24, 2012
B.K. asks from Kaufman, TX
8 answers

I have a 3 1/2 year old who is ready to potty train. The problem is, we can't seem to figure out how to "make it come out". We've sat on the potty, we've stood at the potty, we've sang songs while we waited, we read books while we waited...he just can't seem to figure out how to make the pee-pee start! He is ready is every other way...he can hold it (for more than half the day, actually), he wakes up dry (sometimes) in the morning, he is interested in being potty trained, he wants to wear big boy underwear...I mean, it all seems to be there except the actual step ONE of the process! :) I'm a little concerned because when we've put him in big boy underwear, he'll hold it for over half the day...& then have an accident...I'm afraid he's going to end up getting a bladder infection because he holds it for so long, not wanting to have an accident. Any ideas or suggestions to help the process along?

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L.J.

answers from Louisville on

did you run water when he sits down? Did you let him see daddy pee? He isnt ready yet if he cannot feel that it is time to go. Maybe talk to his doctor about it.

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J.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Get a doll and have it "demonstrate" going. There are many dolls on the market that are designed specifically to do this. They squirt water etc. Or you could hold a small cup or bottle of water behind the doll and so forth. Some boys like "target" practice. Put a few cheerios in the bowl and tell him to "shoot em" It's a game for sure, but you'll get them using the bathroom and it won't clog the toilet.

Be sure your child is drinking plenty of water too. If he drinks enough, he will eventually NEED to go.

Sometimes hovering and so forth puts too much pressure on them. If after 5 minutes of trying, nothing happens...move on.

I used a potty watch (timer) with my youngest. He loved it because he felt more in "control." Instead of me prompting him to head to the potty, the watch would...with a special little song. The watch has several settings. I chose to be reminded every 30 minutes when we first started then spread it out to every two hours until he was fully trained. He'd go and sit whether he had to or not. Eventually he would go. In time, we figured out what time of day he usually had to go and that's when we'd be sure to be near a bathroom. Things quickly became second nature.

we got our watch from www.onestepahead.com

For more about modeling, just youtube or google one-day potty training or Dr. Phil's one day pottty training method and you'll find videos of how to do this if you need the extra help.

GL

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M.M.

answers from Albuquerque on

My trick was to tell them not to fart. I'd be in the bathroom with them and say, "Oh man, I hope you don't fart! I don't want it to be stinky in here!" My kids would get a sneaky look on their faces, then they would try to fart and of course the pee would come out instead. I would look all astonished and say, "Hey!! I thought you told me you didn't have to pee! You tricked me!!" The kids would giggle and brag all day how they "tricked" me. It worked every single time. :)

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C.D.

answers from Eugene on

We went to a potty training class at our local early intervention Agency. They suggested giving our three year old something to drink along with a salty snack, like goldfish crackers. Then wait twenty minutes before sitting on the potty. The liquids plus the salt almost guarantee that your child will need to pee. It worked wonders for us as we were finally able to help our daughter connect the dots with peeing and sitting on the potty. Best of luck!

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

My mom ran the bathroom sink, collected the water to water indoor/outdoor plants. Something about the sound of running water helps you go you know. Then once something does happen make it a celebration!

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K.B.

answers from San Francisco on

I'm in the midst of potty training with my almost 3.5 year old twin boys. One is further along than the other and he just seemed to get what he needed to do to make the pee come out. The other one sometimes sits on the potty and says "Help me" because he can't make it go.

When we started, we would try to go every 20 minutes and in between we would have them drink fluids. We typically did water or milk, but orange juice can work pretty well too. Plus, my kids don't get juice that often so it's a treat and they are more apt to drink it all. If you take a day at home and go every 20-30 minutes, then chances are he will have his accident on (or near) the potty. If you can catch him actually start to go, even if he misses the toilet, you can try to put a positive spin on it. Like "That's it! That's how you make the pee pee come. Maybe next time we can get closer to or in the potty."

Is he on the big potty or a kiddy potty? The one of mine that has trouble making the pee come out does much better sitting on the kiddy potty, even though we have a step stool for the big potty. There is just something about the sitting position that is better on the kiddy potty.

Also, for one of mine, I noticed that doing books or iPad or other activity seemed to actually distract him from going. So if he didn't go while doing the books or iPad, I'd then let him sit without distraction for a little bit.

It doesn't sound like motivation is a problem as he wants to potty train. We did the reward system for going in the potty and a bonus if they stay dry between trips to the bathroom. If you have trouble motivating him to try every 20 minutes, you can start with a reward for trying and then when he gets the hang of it, try switching to a new reward for success instead of just trying.

Good luck!

N.G.

answers from Dallas on

I had a friend who swore that running water in the bathroom sink, and pouring some over her kid's toes while they sat on the potty helped them release those muscles. I think deep breathing helps. Deep breaths in throuhg the nose, blow slowly out through the mouth.

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

He just needs to sit on the potty several times a day. If he goes, great, if not, that's ok, he can just try again later, no biggie. There's no need for him to sit there until it happens.
I started taking my son every half hour, then every hour, etc. at 22 months and I did the same with my girls, who were both a little over two. Worked like a charm! Since your son is older and able to hold it longer I'd start by taking him every hour and go from there :).

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