Help please! My son is 3 1/2. I started potty training him not long after he turned 3. He really got the pee-pee thing down, never wets in his pants and never wets the bed. However, he will not poo-poo on the potty at all! He will go in his pants and then tell me he has poopoo. He used to really go but now he doesn't want to go in his pants as much so he just goes a little bit and holds it in his bottom. The problem is he does this all day because he won't really go. I have tried EVERYTHING! We have tried rewards, stickers, candy, favorite movies, etc. We have tried books, singing, listening to music, everything. A friend of mine told me that if I could get him to sit there he would eventually go, but that doesn't help either. He will sit there for an hour or so at a time and NOTHING! We got a leappad game thing and I will make him sit there for 20 minutes and then let him play it while he sits there thinking that will help him relax and go but he won't! I am at my wits end here! Please help!
Hello everyone! I so much appreciate all the advice and support. Yesterday, following much advice, I gave my son a small amount (less than 1/2 tsp.) of Miralax in his morning juice and Praise God last night he pooped in the potty! I am afraid I might have given him a little bit too much Miralax even though it didn't seem like much because he has sort of runny bowels now but he has pooped in the potty more times than I can count over the last few hours! Thank you so much! T.
My 5 year old would not poo poo on the potty until the age of 4. now he is a pro. I also have a 3 year old who will not poo poo on the potty. I am not stressing about it, he will go when he goes, A lot of boys dont fully potty train until the age of 4
Good luck- A.
T.,
My son did the very same thing. I thought he would be dating before I ever got him potty trained. However, all I can tell you is relax. The more stressed out you are, the more he will be. One day my son just did it and he never went back. He is now 4 and does not have may setbacks and loves to use the potty.
I know this may sound crazy, but let him be naked. He will realize that when he has to go, the only place is the potty. You are at home with him so that makes it easier to do. That is how I started training my oldest when he was just over 2.
Well, every child is different, but my son did the exact samething. We tried everything just like you have, finally I came to the conclusion that there was no reason, he wasn't afraid etc, so it was a choice he was making. We explained to him that just like other choices tha tare poor there are consequences. So we gave him lots of good healthy food to keep him regular, then when he would go poop in his pants, I would not clean it up he had to (with my supervision ofcourse). I taught him how to take the underwear off, dump the poop in the potty, clean himself up, and get redressed. Then he had to take his stinky, yucky underwear ouside and clean them with the water hose. It took less than a week and he decided it was easier to go in the potty.
T.,
I know firsthand how frustrating that is. My oldest did not even try to go to the potty at all until age 4 1/2. I kept telling the pediatrician something was wrong. We were right, he was diagnosed with ADHD six months before, sensory motor integration problem, and PDD. The ADHD is the predominant thing that he has and once he went, he went all the way. I don't think there is anything to worry about with your son. I work in our church nursery, and kids develop at different ages, different stages. They are all unique. It sounds like you are doing a good job. I'd call my family neighborhood pediatrician and get their advice just to make sure there is nothing lurking there beneath the surface. I think your son is progressing normally for him. Keep the chin up, You are doing a wonderful job.
My son did the same thing. It is a pain but you just have to be patient. He will get the hang of it. You can also try giving him a baby suppository in the bathroom and putting him directly on the toilet. This shows him exactly what to expect and how it feels.
The same thing happened with my daughter. She did not want to poop because she was afraid of it.She would literally scream when she saw it. I began to take her with me when I went, and let her see mine in the toilet. She finally started going on her own!
OK I raised and potty trained 4 daughters. No problem all by age 2. Then I met and fell in love with a man with a non potty trained 3 yr old son and the lasiest ex wife in the history of lazy moms. It took me until we had him for summer break (one month) and she couldnlt interfere. I took a toy away everytime he messed his pants. I made him choose which toy he was losing. I had a special trash can out back for just his toys. After a week of losing almost everythihng he owned he was able to earn one back for each dry day he had. Mean i know, but I tried all the piositive reinforcement stuff first too. Just plain didn't work for him.
My son was like that and he started on his own, we didn't push or prod and one day he did it so just be patient. I think the leappad could be a distraction, if he has an urge and he starts playing he maybe relaxing and therefore loosing the urge to go. My advice would be just be patient and reward him when he does poo poo in the potty make it a big deal when he does it right.
Opal
My oldest was scared of the whole poopy thing. I kept pull ups where she could get them herself. Seh would run in and change and to a pull up and then tell me after. I kept talking to her about going poopy in the potty chair. Finally she just decided to try it "just one time". I gave her a party favor reward and she was hooked. For some reason it really scared her. It was as if she was afraid she would lose everything. It took a while with the pull ups but she got it.
I had the same problem with my son. My pedi. said it was a milk problem. My son drank a lot of milk and ate cheese all the time for snack. She said he was stopped up and did not know the sensation for having to poop so he would have accidents. We cut milk back to cereal only and gave him Miralax for about a month. It made a HUGE difference. Now he can have milk 3 times a week with no problems. You migh ask your peditrician about it. My son is now 7 and it only took the 1 month to get it under control. Good Luck.
I know how fustrating this is my daughter is almost 2 1/2 I potty trained last month and it only took three days. The only problem is that she will not poop in the potty at all. It has been over a month and I still have had no sucess on pooping in the potty. I have tried everything it is so weird because it was so easy to pee potty train her. I am not sure what the reason is, but if you get advice that works please let me know.
I'm sorry I don't have much advice. I have a 3yo son who could care less about potty training. Everyone keeps telling me he will do it when he is ready but I am beginning to wonder!! I think you are lucky that he pees in the potty! But seriously,he may be making it worse by trying to hold his poop in. It will just make it harder and painful when does finally go.(so that makes him not want to go) I would give him high fiber foods to make it less painful when he does go. Not sure if you can give him a stool softener at this age?? Good luck.
We had the same problem with our (then) 2 y/o. He potty trained quickly, but wouldn't poop. He would only poop in his pants, so I started keeping him bare during the day. That worked, but as soon as I would dress him to leave the house, or get ready for bed, he would poop. I finally decided I would have to keep him bare longer than he could hold it. It took about four days (and more juice than I would normally allow), but he finally had to let it go. He let out a little scream and ran to the potty! He never had another problem after that. It really wasn't difficult (and he was never in trouble over it), but I did have to commit to staying home until he gave up. Good luck!
Oh I feel your pain! My was "Potty-Trained" for MONTHS before he was "Poop-Trained."
We never forced the issue with him with either and let him let us know when he was ready. We talked about it all the time and encouraged him. Let him pick out big boy undies that he could wear when he went poop in the potty. We even planned a potty party for when he was totally potty trained and told him he could invite his best friend.
I did try to get him to sit on the potty often but if he balked to much I didn't push it. I just knew that he was too much like me and the more I pushed the more he was going to resist.
It took several months but when he was ready, he went and he's pretty much NOT had an accident since.
I have 3 boys, and my middle son was much that way, but he got to where he would hold it for days sometimes a week, then it would hurt when he did go, then he would hold it again because he was scaredit would hurt again. this was a very hard cycle to break once established, so the sooner you can help him the better. what finally helped us was mineral oil. we would put 1-2 tbs/day in his milk in his sippy cup in the morning, and he never knew it. it's suppose to be tasteless, so you could stir it into yogurt or applesauce, lots of options. ths is a natural stool softener, so after a while, he won't be able to hold it, just be ready to either clean or throw away quite a few ungies for a while until his habit is changed. good luck! K.
i had the same problem with my son that is about to be 4. he fully potty trained himself..... just let him take his time. he will do it before too long. i found with my son, if i pushed the issue, it made him not want to that much more.
A friend of mine found out from her doctor that her son wouldn't move his bowels because it hurt him, recommended a stool softner and more fiber in his diet. Check with his doctor and see if this might be your son's problem and what he recommends.
My first son was like this and I used a glycerin supository and it was magic. His poop obviously "fell out" in the potty and he saw that it didn't hurt one bit. From that point on he pooped in the potty, no problem. It could have back-fired on me and traumatized the poor kid but God was with me! LMAO I will tell you he wasn't happy about me putting the supository in but I WAS DESPERATE. He was 4 years old! Anyhow, use your own judgement. Good luck!
I had the same problem with my son...after trying everything, I finally took his favorite toy away and told him he could have it back when he went on the potty! It worked on the first try!
My son did this also. I tried to bribe him with everything. Finally, I got fed up and told him that if he pooped in his pants, I would take away his favorite DVD (Dora at the time) for the rest of the day. The first time, it was about 330 pm, so it was not a big deal to him. The next time, it was 10am. Needless to say that day was not really fun, but he started going in the potty. He had a couple of accidents, but it wasn't him holding it.
Good luck! I know it is not fun to clean that up.
Ask him to let you know when his stomach hurts. Give him a little prune juice and sprite and warm it up. He will go within a couple of hours if he is constipated. Maybe raisins as a snack or chocolate milk. Sometimes just reverse psychology may work.
My son also was reluctant to poop on the potty. (If he holds it too long it will only make him constipated and hurt when he does go.) I ended up giving him lots of prunes (he liked them) and prune juice until I knew he had to go. With no underwear and cuffed old sweats (must have a cuff!) it only took 2 times of pooping down his leg and I would NOT take them off right away. When I did, I used gloves and put it in the toilet so he could see. After that he asked to poop in the potty. I did throw out the pants, though. Good luck!
We had the same problem with our son and he was holding it for days at a time. Our doctor suggested giving him a laxative and putting him on the potty until he went. She said this would get him going on the potty and it worked. Once he did it once in the potty he was so excited. I think I only gave him a laxative 2 times on two different days and then he would go on his own. I would not suggest giving him a laxative for a long period of time, but he had held out going for 4 or 5 days, so he needed to go.
My oldest daughter went through this with her oldest child. She was at her witts end. Her pedi told her not to let my grands legs tangle. Anther words if you are potty traning on big potty make sure the child has a stool under their feet. this takes the pressure off their bottoms and singals their body it's ok to go.It worked like magic for my grand. Of course if you are using a potty chair their feet should be stable anyway. Good Luck and hang in there.
