I have a son who is between the ages of 3/4 and will not go to the bathroom on his own. Their are times when he will go on his own while their are other times when he will not. We have tried the reward system and that has failed miserably. It has become tiresome trying this methods when at times it seems he is ready to go on his own but then he keeps recessing back into using his training pants as diapers. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
My pediatrician advised me to stop using training pants and pullups altogether when I was having the same problem. I told my daughter all the pullups were gone. Can't get any more. Doctor told me to make a big deal of the times she went to the potty but not the times she didn't. I put underwear on her and after a day or two of discovering how bad the wet underwear felt and how she didn't like making puddles on the floor, she started using the potty every time. Sometimes we just have to be patient.
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J.F.
answers from
Denver
on
Take the diapers off! My daughter gets SO mad when I put underwear on, but that is the only way she can learn!
Also setting the timer all day and going to the potty on schedule... Don't ask, just take them.
Just be patient and keep up the work! It will get better :)
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M.B.
answers from
Atlanta
on
Hi J.! I'm currently potty training my son who will be 3 next month and my 17 month old son (which has been a bit more of a challenge). I would definitely agree with what everyone has said on here. Although I only use pull ups during naps and at night, Huggies has made a great and FREE DVD that offers advice for parents and great songs and activities for kids. My son loved singing along with the song. Here is the link to order it: http://www.pull-ups.com/na/potty_training_DVD.aspx. One more tip that someone gave me in church yesterday, put regular underwear on under pull-ups so that he can still feel the wet sensation...but you won't have the mess of the undies alone. GOOD LUCK :-)
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A.B.
answers from
Atlanta
on
No more training pants. They don't actually feel that uncomfortable when you wet in them. Peeing in your dry clothes? That feels gross! Make the switch and he will probably try harder to go in the potty.
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B.M.
answers from
Dallas
on
Hi J.! As a mom who struggled getting her daughter potty trained I can TOTALLY relate! She started showing interest at about 2 1/2 and then every time we would work on it she would regress. NOTHING worked for her, we tried charts, stickers, presents every time she went, we even resorted to m&m's at the pressing of some girlfriends. She just had no interest in anything we were rewarding her with.
I must say I agree with the other moms. Take the diapers and training pants away unless it is nap time. What worked for our daughter was I went on bed rest in January (she was a couple of months shy of her 3rd b-day) and my husband told her that mommy couldn't bend down to change her diapers and so we did the no pants method. She would run around with just her shirt and we had a little potty in the living room and then a toilet adapter and step stool in her bathroom. After a few weeks she started getting the hint. We put her in big girl panties which we let her pick out at the store, and I did notice that she would still have accidents while watching t.v. because she would get so wrapped up in the show she was watching. So for about a month and a half we implemented a timer and we would set it for every 40 minutes and have her go sit on the potty, even if she didn't pee we would have her sit there for a minute.
All of my girlfriends had their kids potty trained at 2 or 2 1/2, and would always give me advice or say "she'll never get it" but honestly, each kid is different. I knew my daughter would be potty trained before she started kindergarten and my husband and I remained positive throughout the process. You cannot get upset at accidents and have to continually praise him for any effort he makes :-) My daughter turned 3 in April and I consider her fully potty trained except for naps and bedtime, she will still have the occasional accident.
Good luck! Hang in there!
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T.G.
answers from
St. Louis
on
Take a deep breath . . . . . this is normal. As frustrating as it is, some children take longer than others. As parents we want our kids to be on "schedule" with other kids, but it doesn't always happen.
I do agree with taking the training pants away during the day. It sounds like he would benefit from using the timer and walking him into the bathroom everytime. I would start the timer at 30 minutes. For the first day, walk him in every time. On the second day, walk him in the first time and then for the rest of the times, tell him to head to the potty and you will meet him in there. Take your time. Call out to him and go over the steps. "go ahead, sit on the potty, mommy is on her way.." Give him a minute and go in. Tell him what a good job he did getting on the potty by himself. Eventually you can move the timer to every 45 minutes, then an hour etc. Each day you stay in the bathroom less and less. Tell him you'll be right back and leave for 30 seconds. then you can build up the time. Keep talking to him, even after you leave the bathroom.
Remember to celebrate EVERY time he goes on the potty. Dance if you have to, give him a high five, sing the potty song. Make it fun for him.
If he has an accident, try not to react.
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R.D.
answers from
San Francisco
on
There are times when children revert back and forth. Are you using a potty or just a regular toilet? Hopefully a potty. My son was hard to train, what I did was when he sat down and I knew he was going for a bowel movement, I cut up a weiner and put it in the potty. I clapped my hands, and said good boy. This happened a few times and he caught on. You have to be consistent as well. Try him on the potty at least every 2hrs. If the potty is in the bathroom sometimes when he's sitting, run the water. This usually makes them go as well. Like I said though, be consistent, he really doesn't know yet that he has to go until its to late, so you have to take the time every couple of hrs. and put him on the potty. Good luck, I'm sure it won't take long.
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J.B.
answers from
Los Angeles
on
my daughter is the same age and we did a sticker chart. when she would go in the potty 7 times she got a special treat. I also used a timer for a while and set it for every 30 mins. It worked for me. I also put her right into underwear however we still use diapers for night time. But Im going to tackle that soon.
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J.V.
answers from
Chicago
on
Take the training pants away.
Also, you need to help him learn what I call potty etiquette, so put him on a schedule, and he will eventually take it over himself. So, first thing in the morning we go, after snack, before leaving the house, etc. It takes them time to take themselves without our prompting. Give him time.
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C.O.
answers from
Sacramento
on
As children grow, the have moments of regression and need a little bit of extra emotional support. This is perfectly natural. Take the time to give him the extra support, even if it means you are standing in the bathroom with him for a few days; then slowly transition yourself out. by moving closer tot he door, then in the doorway, then just out in the hall, and so on. He will get past the stage.
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S.G.
answers from
Savannah
on
No pull ups or diapers unless it is bed time. Put him on a schedule starting from the time he wakes up in the AM for every 1/2 hr 45 mins for a few days then expand the time frame if you notice him not needing to go as often. Add 5-10 mins. Don't ask him if he has to go potty, tell him it is time to go potty and take him to the bathroom. If he doesn't go take him back in 5 or 10 mins to try again. This will also avid them being to busy to listen to their own body telling them the need to go potty. Kids think the world is going to end if they stop what they are doing to go potty, teach him that it will still be there when he gets done.