Potty Traing My 2 Yearold

Updated on June 27, 2010
H.P. asks from Mountain Home AFB, ID
19 answers

my son is 2 years and 3 months we have been trying to potty train him for 3 months now but he still hasnt got it. and tips on potty training a boy

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So What Happened?

people say not to use pull ups but i do for naps, bed time and when we go out. when we are home he is in underwear but has like 3-4 messes a day and i just take him to the potty and tell him next time go here and he says ok. when he does go there i give him a fruit snack and make a big deal out of it. this hasnt really worked yet should i stop potty training

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T.W.

answers from Denver on

Get a book called Potty Training in a Day. Worked with my first boy in half a day - no accidents (he was 2 years 1 month). My second boy, I knew going in that he would need a different motivation so I added to the program a treat bowl. It was huge and filled with all kinds of treats the he wanted from the dollar store (trucks, candy, toys, etc.). I told him that he could pick a treat every time he used the toilet. It took him one day - no accidents (he was 2 years 6 months).

Now all that being said, I would not do the potty training for a couple of weeks before I started one of these techniques. Just get any resistance out of his mind then give it a try.

Sometimes too, boys need to wait a bit longer, you might find that he just needs a couple more months to be ready. Not a big deal.

Good luck!

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M.B.

answers from Boise on

I can help you but i need to do it over the phone. There are certain things you must be able to do to be successful.

I live in Boise and my # is ###-###-####.

If anyone else wants help, feel free to call me too.

Good Luck and I hope I hear from you soon H..

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

It almost never works to "push" potty training. Kids will get there without pressure, which leads to resentment, resistance, disappointment, and fear of failure – for both child and parents. You can talk about it, show him how mom and dad use the potty, read books and play puppet games, etc., but he'll get there just as fast or even faster if you don't try to get him trained before he's matured enough physically and emotionally.

Your son will let you know when he's ready. He'll show interest, ask questions, want to try himself. And when that time comes, usually not earlier than 2.5 or later than maybe 4 for boys, he'll get himself trained quickly and without stress, without charts and rewards. When a child is emotionally and physically mature enough, they take to potty training with the same determination and eagerness that they did to walking and talking.

Be aware, too, that daytime training, poop training, and night training are separate steps for many children. Some kids continue to need night protection into elementary school, especially boys. They really can't help it – they sleep heavily and just don't get those full-bladder signals during sleep.

Good luck to you both. My grandson trained very quicky at around 3, and my daughter trained in just a few days at about 2.5 – both when they showed interest in doing it themselves.

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E.C.

answers from Dallas on

H.,

I feel your pain, not as a mother, but more as a teacher. I have just a 6 year old daughter and she was potty trained by a year and half BUT I use to run a daycare with almost 300 kids and well many boys that needed to be potty trained.

Before being a director I was a 3 yo teacher. The kids had to be potty trained before moving in my class. On avg most boys are 3 when they are fully potty trained NOT becuase that is when they can but more of a choice between them and parents. A lot of parents find it easy to just deal with diapers and pull ups verses actually working with kids.

Most children if you devout a good 7-14 days they can be fully potty trained. You need to be on it though. Take him to the bathroom every 45min -1 hour. DONT have him sit. Pee standing. If he learns to sit then its another transition to stand. Make sense? Like the previous poster try a chart pennies, stickers etc... 1 for pee 2 for poo..

Your best thing is to be CONSISTANT and to keep taking him. Dont slack. Straight underwear and no pullups. (nap time and bedtime ok)

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J.B.

answers from Denver on

It could be he's not ready. Do you demonstrate in front of him that humans use a toilet? A lot of parents I know go to the bathroom behind closed doors (not allowing their toddlers to watch), and expect their little ones to catch on to what's happening.

I talk my daughter through what I'm doing and feeling. She's about your sons age and she sporadically strips down and makes it to the potty on her own. I have not started "formally" potty training her yet. I don't want to push or rush her because I don't want regression or the accidents where they poop in the corners because they get all confused about expectations.

My girlfriend had success with this method- it'll take a long weekend-
buy him undies and a few pair of bloomers (they keep the pee in). Take him to the potty first thing when he wakes up, after his nap, and just before and just after eating. Keep track of his potty cycle. You'll want to ask him about every 15 minutes if he has to potty. Just keep this up till he gets the hang of it and starts telling you he needs to go. Make sure you have him sit when he pees. It's a little hard to get a toddler to stand and pee like an American man does. - the point of the undies and bloomers is that no one likes the feeling of being that wet, and it will spur a desire to not experience that sitaution again. Make sure you praise him like crazy when he does get it right and do NOT discipline or punish him for mistakes.

Best of luck!

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D.M.

answers from Denver on

Hello. Boys are usually not ready until 2 1/2 to 3 years old. If it isn't going well. Wait 6 months and then try again or you can ask him if he is ready to try again. It should go VERY easy or he is not ready. Its okay. I have known boys to go longer than 3 years old.

Its much easier, won't effect your relationship with him and your stress level, and he won't feel that he is constantly disappointing you.

Besides, it could be the connection between his brain to control the muscle to hold it. He is still younger than the average age for boys which is 3.

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K.M.

answers from Denver on

Hi H., it's probably a little early. Honestly, I have several friends who say that their kids are potty trained at 24 and 26 months, etc. However, what this really translates to is "I've managed to get my kid into underwear and sometimes he actually makes it through the day without an accident, but usually I'm changing his clothes several times a day." We started really working with our son at about 30 months and by 33 months he was totally dry, day and night. Now, at 3 and 1/4 years, I literally can't remember the last accident! We bought Spiderman and Thomas underwear for him, which he LOVED. If he wet them once, he had to wear those padded training pants, if he wet those, it was back into diapers for the day. We didn't make an issue out of it but he REALLY wanted to wear those big boy underwear. Really, this was pretty much the trick. Like I said, it took 3-4 months but we got there before he was 3. Good luck!

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J.W.

answers from Colorado Springs on

It sounds to me like he may not be quite ready. I would let it go and watch for signs that he is ready. Can he pull his pants up and down? Ask him if he wants to sit on the potty or read books on the potty. Don't over do it though. You may in fact be met with a whole lot of resistence. My son is the same age and he is not one bit interested in the toilet. Though we ask him all the time if he wants to sit on the potty and we let him come in the bathroom with us he has no desire to sit on it. Kids really can only control two things in their lives. What goes in and what comes out. Let him be your guide.

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C.E.

answers from Provo on

give him time. no need to stop potty training, but for your own sanity there's nothing wrong with using pull ups all the time until he is keeping them totally dry. just because a child is interested and willing to use a toilet does not mean they are going to jump right in to using it regularly. if he really loves his underwear, he can wear it over the pull ups.

M.W.

answers from Fort Collins on

It's possible he's just not ready. You didn't give much detail as to the problems your having, but you might want to try taking a break and start again in a couple of months. That worked great for my daughter. After the break she was ready and I had her trained within a week.
Good Luck!

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J.L.

answers from Pueblo on

Sounds like he isnt ready yet. Put the potty away for 3 months and then bring it back out to see if he is ready. Forcing a child who isnt ready to potty train can do more harm than good and set him back further than when he would naturally be ready for it. Most people I know with boys were not ready for potty training until 3-4 years old.

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M.D.

answers from Denver on

I tried to potty train my son at that age as well and it was a disaster. I finally dropped all mention of the potty since we were all getting frustrated. A few months later, he went in, used it by himself and that was that. I personally think that children have to be ready to be trained before it works. Ages that kids are ready varies greatly too. I have a friend who swears her kids were completely potty trained by 20 months. I have another friend whose 3.5-year-old boy still has 5 or 6 accidents a day. So, my advice, just drop the entire conversation for a few months and see what happens. You can leave the training toilet in the bathroom but don't bring it up. Toilet training is definitely a two-steps-forward, 1-step-backward situation sometimes. Patience is key. Good luck!

A.G.

answers from Pocatello on

It sounds to me like he is just not ready. Lots of boys aren't ready until they are closer to age 3. You hear about people training their kids in one day right? Well it's because they wait until their kids are %100 ready to be potty trained. My sister trained her son in about 1 day and in 3 days he was fully potty trained but he was 2 months away from turning 3. Or it may be how you are doing it. I mean are you putting him in underwear so he has to deal with the mess when he does go in the potty? When I potty trained my daughter she wore underwear all day everyday. So when she did have an accident she realized it was a no no right away. Your son is still really young....I wouldn't stress about it too much and just wait until he is ready.

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M.T.

answers from New York on

My little boy was only just recently potty trained at 34 months but then, I also had a couple clues that he was ready...First, the diaper was dry in the morning. (Big key that he developed bladder control.) Then, he was fascinated and wanted to sit on the potty we had. (No fancy sounds or gimmicks -- just a chicken with handles...sat like a toddler motorcycle.)

A couple of potty books (he LOVED "Everybody Poops"), one M&M for a pee and one Hershey's Kiss for a poop and in three days, it was over. Once he figures out the sensation to wanting to pee and then actually peeing, he'll be set!

Oops, I must tell you Pull-Ups don't help. They feel like diapers and still provide security for our stubborn boys. Just roll-up those expensive rugs and let him go "commando". He'll hate the sensation of wetting himself. Toddler underwear is a great incentive, too...he won't want to get them wet either. Good luck!! Don't worry, your son will get there!

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C.E.

answers from Denver on

He may not be ready. Give him some time. If you push it, it will become a power struggle -- one that he will win because he has control over it! Relax, he'll go when he's ready. :)

God Bless-
C.

ps. Do not use Pull-ups!! They only delay the process because they are too much like diapers and the kids can go in them without it being "messy".

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J.P.

answers from Missoula on

My tip would be to wait until he's 3 1/2 years old. I tried younger on both my boys.. and they didn't get it.. and then it seemed like 3 1/2 was the magic number! It took them a week to get it, day and night, with virtually no accidents in bed at night. He just might not be ready.

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J.P.

answers from Denver on

Wow---your son seems very young to be potty training. My son is the same age, and while he knows about potty and watches his big brother, he isn't even close to having the body awareness to actually tell me when he has to go. My older son didn't fully potty train until he was 3 1/2. But after months of letting him decide whether it was a diaper day or an underwear day, he just decided he was ready and he did it. No charts or stickers or anything. He was simply ready. It was way easier than jumping through hoops to get him potty trained. So based on my experience (with years of daycare as well), I say wait until he tells you he wants to do it and don't have any expectations. Frankly, he'll do it when he's ready and not once second before. So enjoy the fact that you don't have to drop everything to run to the bathroom when you're out and about a little longer and let his body mature a little bit more.
J.

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

Both my boys were potty trained 4 months after they turned 2. My girls were 3 and 4...LOL I used pennies as a prize. 1 penny for pee and 2 for poo and 3 for both. He loved it. If your son likes pennies this could be a great motivator. Keep working with him, it'll come! Good luck!

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A.P.

answers from Denver on

I did the three day potty training method. It took about three weeks but I like the method and it seemed to do the trick. I also read a gender specific book to him about going potty and being a big boy evey night. I tried once at 23 months and he just didn't seem to get it or care so I quit but kept reading the book and showing him the big boy underwear and a a couple months later he asked if he could wear them so we did the potty training method and he caught on right away except for number 2 that took a lot longer. We also used pull ups for naps and night time only(despite what the potty training book said). The pull ups went away about 6-8months later.

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