Playing an Instrument

I think you should let him try the different instruments for one and take him to some concerts. If he finds that he really likes pep bang and jazz band you can explain that he wouldn't have that choice if he played the string instrument. I just know that you want him to find something he will be happy with for a long time but also you don't want to force anything on him or he won't enjoy it. Play some jazz CD's that ought to sway him to the good side...p.s. if you can't tell i am a band geek!

I think he should be able to say which instrument he would like to play. I believe they can learn any instrument when given the chance. Children are so smart and conform easy to what they are doing. With plenty of practice, any instrument could possibly be the perfect instrument.

Hello M.,
Being a teacher, and a mother my inclination is to let the child try out the instrument they want. It doesn't mean they'll stick with it but the violin/cello are what have stood out to your son in an environment that introduces all instruments. Later on, if he is so inclined, he can switch. It's about learning to love playing in the beginning. My little brother started with piano but has learned to play guitar and drums.

Let him choose which one he wants to play. If he learns to read music and really "gets into" being a musician, chances are he will be able to learn another instrument later if he wanted to be in pep-band or marching band. I really wanted to play trumpet and my mom wouldn't let me because it wasn't "girly" enough. So I started on clarinet and really didn't like it much and nearly quit band. But I moved to a small school and we didn't have a wide enough variety of instruments (everyone was clarinet, flute or sax) so my director tried some of us on different instruments and I ended up playing baritone and I loved it (even if it wasn't "girly"). My mom let me switch since it was like a special request from the band director. (I ended up playing in an awesome college marching band too.) Anyway...my point is...I think they are the most successful when they are allowed to play the instrument (or do the thing, dance, sports, chess, etc.) that they have a passion for. Best of luck to your son...and to you (someone did mention the earplugs, right?). :)

Aaaaaaah the memories that this letter brings to the front of my mind!!! All three of my daughters were involved in music both at home and in school, some more heavily than others.
Let him try the one that he is most interested in but do NOT buy an instrument...because he may change his mind by this time next week!! Make sure that he understands that he is making a commitment for the semester, year, whatever the program at school requires. If he doesn't seem happy with the choice he has made, let him choose something else next year.
Don't let your inclinations color his decisions, my daughters all chose instruments that I would have never chosen ( Violin, Cello and Flute) but they all enjoyed it because they chose what was interesting to them.
There are SO many benefits to having a child involved in organized music programs that extend far far beyond the music itself. And as another Mama has already said...earplugs are cheap...INVEST IN SOME...I can tell you that there is nothing more painful than the beginning screeches of a string instrument...it sets my teeth on edge just to think of it!!!
R. Ann

There are places where you can rent instruments until you are sure he will stick with a certain one. By all means, LET HIM DECIDE! You can't make anyone want to play an instrument that does not inspire them. If he is mentally/emotionally/intellectually stimulated by the violin or cello, let him play it. Many studies prove music enhances learning, especially in the math and language areas of the brain. Best wishes!

we went thru this last year! BUT our music department allows the first 4-6 weeks for the students to try out all instruments available. Our son had several different favs, but ended up choosing the baritone. It turns out that he is quite adept at many different instruments, but the baritone is what really "called" to him....& by the end of that 1st year, he'd held 1st Chair repeatedly.

By contrast, several of our friends chose the instrument for their children....& more than 1/2 of those kids dropped out of band due to lack of interest. Soooo, I truly do believe that the students should be allowed to chose on their own.

As somebody that played an instrument from Elementary school to college - violin, cello, flute, oboe - I can tell you that it's better to let your child decide what they want to play. While it's true that there are more opportunities to play in different settings with a band instrument, if you force your son to choose an instrument of your liking he will resent it and drop out as quickly as he is allowed.

I remember "just knowing" in 5th grade that I didn't want to play in the orchestra and that the flute was my preferred instrument. My daughter, on the other hand, played violin in 4th grade (required) and decided to continue in 5th and 6th grade. She absolutely didn't want to play a band instrument in 6th grade - never a question for her, though she had the opportunity to switch to band this year (6th). People that like to play music seem to have a feel for what instrument's right for them - something I've seen over and over again.

Personally, I feel that the important thing is that a child plays an instrument, not that they play a particular instrument.

Besides, I knew a couple of people in high school that not only played violin, but learned saxophone/clarinet/ trumpet well enough that they played in both the orchestra and band. Perhaps, given the chance, your son will do the same.

At my kids school the band included practices that started before school, during the summer, about a month of all day. Then once a week in the evenings and during football games. Then there are the competitions away from home that take up entire weekends and cost extra, usually the parent has to pay for a lot of the cost of the trip for the child and the entire trip for the family if they want to watch the competition. The competition itself is usually all day and the kids are left to entertain themselves when they aren't 'on the field'. In short lot's of money and lots of time, but the kids usually love it!
My other daughter was in orchestra, she had lots of opportunities to show her talents at several places around town, but it usually didn't involve money. I think she enjoyed her experience just as much.
Our youngest we let take band, but didn't encourage him to stay in it in High School. He was talked into choir and really likes it although his first thought was that he'd take it long enough for the credit. You never know, but I thought you needed another perspective.

let him choose. If he picks it up well then he will probably be good at picking up another instrument for the other band choices. More than likely if he can play a violin or cello then he would be able to switch to Bass guitar pretty easily for jazz band and most jazz bands need bass players more than anything plus it is an instrument that is very easy to pick up if you have any rhythm at all. Those bands also need keyboard players so maybe he could learn piano as well. My son was a drummer in band and just recently started playing Bass at church. Someone taught him the basics and he was playing in church within 3 weeks and was doing very well after only 6 months of playing. He did end up quitting band in 10th grade because percussion was too boring and there were too many players so the band teacher wasn't using all of them so he figured he would take more college level classes and forget sitting in band doing nothing but he really enjoys playing the Bass now at church and is playing in the youth band and the Sunday worship teams.
I do not recommend percussion to start with because both of my kids picked percussion and ended up quitting band because there are way too many percussionists and don't get to play much. I tried to encourage them to play a different instrument but they insisted on drums and then didn't get to play the drums often and was usually stuck on bells or something else which they hated playing. I figure drums is something you can always pick up later in life if you are instrumental at all. I played Sax in band and can also play clarinet, piano, and drums although I am not a great drummer yet but can do well with most beats, it's the syncopated beats I still have problems with but don't have a lot of time to practice either.

I do know that violin and cello are usually pretty expensive so you may want to rent them for at least a year and make sure that is what he wants to stick with.

Don't worry about pushing him to play in jazz or pep band because not all students get to play in those bands anyway. There are usually so many students that play those typical instruments that usually the top 5 are picked in each level so I would encourage him to learn Bass guitar, guitar, or piano as an extra instrument if those are the bands he wants to play in as those are the instruments they are usually begging for, otherwise they will take a good player from another instrument and have them start learning one of those instruments because the band teacher felt they were talented enough to learn another instrument quickly and that is usually how they get those parts filled. As far as marching band he will probably play percussion parts since there usually isn't violin or string parts.
On another note, good string instrument players usually get better scholarships for college than regular band instruments, also french horn players as well because there aren't as many students playing those instruments and the college bands need those parts because they offer all kinds of different music styles so you may want to think about that as well.
My brother was a good trumpet player and the band teacher encouraged him to play french horn because we didn't have any and even though he was a better trumpet player he got more scholarships with the french horn and mainly played trumpet in college.

Good Morning M., Let him choose what he wants. There is always the opportunity to take another later. I wanted so bad to play the flute, the music person said my mouth was not former right for the flute ( heart breaking) so I had to settle for clarinet. UGH...lol Neighbor girl played violin and we would practice together some nights. Switching instruments lol taught each other the same song so no one would know we switched.. :) They caught on when the same song was played over and over...lol

I love music, guitar, drums, brass, strings, piano (which I have but can't really play) I took lessens FINALLY in my Sr Year in HS. I wish I could play more.
Renting an instrument is lot better then purchasing right now for a new student. Lets them find out for sure if they really like it or the want to try something else.
Just let him choose first!

God Bless you M. and your young man. Music is a gift, playing is the talent.
K. Nana of 5

Hi M., currently, I have one child in high school band and one in college as a music major. Both play woodwind instruments, which allows them to play with the orchestra at various times, along with marching band, etc. - so I see it all. My suggestion is to let your son play what inspires him the most. There will be plenty of activities available for stringed instruments, too - just different than marching band. He probably needs to try different instruments to see what feels right - but the more they like their instrument, the more they are likely to practice and thus enjoy the experience! Hope that helps....C.

Let him try what he wants! He may be very good at it. If he isn't able to keep it up he can always try a different instrument. But this should be HIS choice not 'this is what you are going to play because we think it will be best for you'. Instruments allow people to express them selves. I played flute in grade school, but it just wasn't me. I found the drums in High School & really enjoyed them!

God bless!

My daughters started out with piano lessons and moved on to the sax, trumpet & french horn. The strength they developed from the stringed instrument (piano) has stayed with them throughout their whole school years and then into their 20s where they now are. It helps with concentration both in music and any classroom, it "beefs" up their math skills and provides comfort just to sit and play the piano when they want to enjoy the music and the action involved. Both girls marched band in high school and college. The trumpeter played in the orchestra in college also with her french horn-I think it leans in the string family rather then brass. So if your son wants to play anything LET HIM! The enjoyment he gets will go well after school and help him with life skills along the way and more. It is very "classy" for him to play a violin or cello so if he wants let him-after all he is asking for it and he has made this decision-not you. Look at all the big rock bands today they have a whole orchestra with them so it is not a "sissy" instrument at any level. Rent the instrument first till he is good enough to buy-you can save a bundle and most music stores are in that area to rent also-you might need to look around. Also leswsons are wonderful for all I have mentioned while meeting new people too. Go for it and let him do this. One of my daughter's friends, who dueted with her in school, is now working on his doctorate writing music all from his string instrument (piano). You never know what will please a youngster got to try it.

Children will be most successful with the instrument of *their* choice.
In other words, if he's interested in a stringed instrument, that's what he should play. At this stage, it's not so much about future opportunities for extra-curricular activities as it is about learning music and the enjoyment of playing an instrument.
Please, don't try to push, coerce or force him to play a different instrument. Let him make his own decision--this is a lesson in decision-making as well & if he finds he made the wrong choice (i.e. he doesn't like the violin after all) it's no big deal, but maybe he can't change until next year so he'll have to live with his decision for a while.

Most schools have instrument rental for beginning students, so it's not like you have to go out and make a huge investment to buy an instrument.

Grandma D.

You said the school did a good job on introducing the children to various instruments so why are you second guessing HIS choice? HE wants to play the violin or the cello. It's important to let the kids make their own decisions about this and not to look "down the road" as to what is better for band choices, etc...who's to say he'll even be taking classes beyond next year?

Bottom line, if he wanted a wind instrument he would have picked one. My parents tried to force me to play the clarinet and I told them that if that was the way they were going to be I wouldn't play anything (I was interested in flute). They weren't as thrilled with it but at least I stuck with flute for 3 years.

Young people will be most successful at the instrument they are most interested in learning. Ever see a kid play the piano that didn't want to be there? There are vast opportunities for EVERY instrument (Dave Mathews & Dixie Chicks use violinists) it just requires you to think outside of a normal box. He's young, let him experiment...that's what life is all about!

My husband used to be a band director (5th-12th grades). I know that he would say "let them choose what they want to play." Both band and orchestra instruments get a lot of opportunities to play at concerts, weddings, etc. Let him follow his dream; he is more likely to practice and be excited about music if he gets to choose what to play.
Many schools have rental programs so that a student can try an instrument for a year or so before the family invests a lot of money in something that the child may later choose that he/she does not wish to play anymore.
Best of luck! May your next year be full of beautiful music (in the beginning, the music may only be beautiful to his ears or yours---LOL!)

If orchestra is appealing, maybe he could explore the non-string instruments that are in both orchestra and band, i.e. french horn, trumpet, percussion, oboe, bassoon, flute,etc. It does seem like band has more social opportunities, yet at this age he could try something and still change to a different instrument if he doesn't end up liking the first option. I played flute and piccolo, and when I debated between those and clarinet was told my hands were too small for clarinet--doubt he'll have that issue as a boy though. :-)

Whatever he decides, music is always a good choice--studies have shown students who study music do better in school with their other subjects.

When I started band, all incoming 7th graders could attend a Band Night, where we could try out all the instruments to see which one we showed an aptitude for. The lines for sax and drums were the longest. I ended up going with the French horn, so I'm probably biased toward brass, heh. But the chance to play any musical instrument is a wonderful thing, especially with so many schools cutting music entirely. I went on to major in music in college, and we had to take courses in all the instruments. Trumpet was fun, I never did like the "easy" woodwinds, like clarinet and sax, and violin and viola was fun but very screechy. Just please, let him practice at home. Remember, earplugs are inexpensive. ;-) Good luck to him, and you. (Go brass!)

Hi M.. My husband is a professional musician, and we both majored in music performance in college. Please, if your son wants to play violin or cello, let him. There are a few things to consider here. The first I know is a little far-fetched. Should your son somehow ever want to pursue music as a profession, there are so many more jobs for string players in the world! This is because in any given orchestra, you can have 50+ violins and 20+ cellos compared to about four of every wind or brass instrument. The second thing to consider is difficulty. Generally speaking, string instruments are easier to pick up. Why do you thing there are so many guitar players! String players have a very clear advantage to wind and brass players. They can visually and audibly tune their instruments, whereas winds and brass have to rely much more on their ears. For example, if a string player plays an A and it's out of tune, they can look at their hand while they move it to the proper position to get it into tune. A trumpet player pushes down a key and if it's not in tune, they have to fix it without seeing what they're doing, usually by adjusting the embouchure. I understand your thinking that winds and brass have more opportunity, but when you consider things like the Wichita Symphony Youth Orchestras (whose youngest orchestra, the chamber players, is composed entirely of strings), I think you'll discover that there are plenty of opportunities for string players. And if you're that concerned about it, maybe you should suggest the upright bass to your son. That way, he could play in orchestras and jazz bands! And one comment about marching bands--if your son goes to a school that requires marching if you're in the band program, there's a good chance that marching band will not be fun. Marching band sometimes is really hardcore, and over the years, we've found that it does more to mess up ones face (you have to play really loud because you're outside) and limit ones musicality than anything else. My husband, who teaches privately, has limitless stories about players coming to him in the fall during marching band season with embouchure problems. Usually all of the juniors and seniors hate marching band. Just one more thing. If you can afford it, might I suggest getting your son started with a private teacher? It will do so much for his development, you won't believe it. And just so you know, my husband and I are both brass players. We've both said that when our kids are at the age to play an instrument, we will gently suggest a string instrument, but we will allow them to pick what they want in the end.

Hi, I know I'm responding late, but wanted to give my 2 cents.
I haven't read a lot of the responses, but I gather that most everyone is saying to let him choose.
I agree that it should be the instrument that interests him most if he is to become a practicing musician. If it doesn't interest him enough, it will be too easy for him to drop it all together.
In 5th grade, I wanted to play the drums and my parents put their foot down. (much later, I was thankful because I picked up more music theory playing other instruments)
I talked them into letting me learn trumpet and played that until I graduated high school. Along the way (about 8th grade) I picked up guitar and bass. Once I had the bass in my hands, I knew instantly it was my primary instrument.
I believe my life was forever changed by engaging passionately with the instrument of my choice. It wasn't my first pick, but I eventually found THE one.
I play all kinds of instruments now (including drums!), have met many friends through music, played in many bands, and I'm always thankful that my parents gave me a shot at it.
I'm thankful to hear that there are schools like your son's that give the students an excellent chance to explore music. I'm also thankful to hear there are parents out there that are willing to let them!
good luck with what ever he decides!
lb

M.

Here in Wichita band is not offered in fifth grade, only orchestra which may be why your son says he wants to play the violin or cello. He may not have a choice of brass or woodwind instruments. My oldest son tried the cello in 5th grade but ended up in band playing the baritone in middle school (he is an 8th grader now). The others are right with musical instruments it is best to listen to your child because playing and practicing an instrument you do like is torture.

Good luck

S.