Pics of Underage Teens Drinking on F.B.

Updated on January 05, 2013
3.B. asks from Tampa, FL
16 answers

My family is a novel of disfunction and drama. I usually never get where most of them are coming from w/ their lack of responsibility and ethics...
So LONG LONG story short, I recently run across pics of my underage neice (17) drinking with multiple friends on facebook. In the home my mom owns. My sister(her mom) knows she drinks, smokes and has sex and sees nothing wrong with it. Fine. Not my child. HOWEVER, I find it absolutely insane that she would knowlingly allow underage kids drink where she lives. She wasn't home at the time, so she says she would not have been accountable if something had happened...????
Wouldn't my mother have been accountable? Its her home, in her name. I told my mom about the pictures,and she said she had heard from the downstair tenants what was going on. And said "What can i do about it?
I am furious. i get that kids drink, I really do. But most of these kids drove there. They are all 17 or under. SO many bad things could have happened, and my suspicion is this happens often.
I guess this is more of a rant then question, but could my mother not be in trouble if this happens again and one of these kids go out and kills someone in their car, or dies of alcohol poisoning?
To add, I do not know the names of these other kids, so I couldn't contact their parents if I wanted to.
I am just so floored that parents knowingly let this go on. I was NO angel as a teen, but Id never be this ballsy or reckless! I was too afraid of my parents! Any input??

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D..

answers from Miami on

I'd talk to a lawyer in your mom's area and find out what the legal ramifications are. She needs to know just how much her rear end will be in a sling if one of these kids drives and is involved in a wreck or even if they just get a DUI. She needs to know what she needs to do if she finds out they are drinking in her apartment as well. Bottom line, she needs to learn HOW to protect herself legally. Insurance will probably not help her if she allows underage drinking in her apartment. And her daughter WILL sell her out if something happens, telling authorities that your mom has known about this all along.

Forewarned is forearmed. Get armed...

Dawn

7 moms found this helpful
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H.W.

answers from Portland on

You have it right; your mom would be responsible for any accidents which happened due to intoxication/drinking taking place at her home AND because she either condoned it or turned a blind eye.

She can be nonchalant about it, but I recently read of a very sad case in which a young woman was publicly raped; the other young people who were not actually raping her were taking pictures and posting them instead of calling the police.... they will ALSO be held criminally responsible for their lack of intervention (and probably charges of distributing pedophilia, as the girl in question was 16). Not a pretty story,but all that to say, this stuff *Does* catch up with people.

5 moms found this helpful
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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Go to YouTube and search the words "Today show parent drinking." You'll find a news segment about a couple that hosted their child's party in order to be sure that no one drank. Yet kids smuggled in alcohol -- without the parents' knowledge or approval -- and guess what? The PARENTS were arrested and charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor, even though the parents were clear with the teen guests that this was a no-alcohol party. There are other similiar (and true) stories out there.

So...if you sister is knowingly permitting it, how much worse will the charges against her be? If cops will charge parents who had zero idea the alcohol was there -- how much harder will they come down on your sister, who gives drinking the green light?

And as for your mom-- she is definitely at risk of being arrested. Again, see the news item. Even if she has no idea what's up, she is responsible legally.I can only figure that your mom is older - wouldn't it devastate her to be arrested for this?

Your sister is asking to get arrested. That can lead to losing her job; having her name all over the local papers and TV; her kid will be mercilessly teased at school (or treated like the coolest kid ever, leading her to a swelled head and more sex and drinking); and much more.

I don't know, though, what you really do with this information if your sister is so blind, or frankly so dumb, that she thinks it's all OK. You could send her links to news items, etc. but it sounds like she would laugh in your face. It might take her getting arrested for your sister to wake up.

The pity is that some kid will end up dead after driving away from your mom's house drunk and will possibly take some other, innocent driver with him.

4 moms found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Yes your mother would have been responsible if anyone was injured due to drinking in her home.

3 moms found this helpful

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

Yes, your mother absolutely could be responsible. What can she do about it? She can put a stop to it. She can tell your sister to stop leaving her 17 yr old home alone. She can tell them they have to go live somewhere else if this doesn't stop.

3 moms found this helpful
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C.D.

answers from Atlanta on

I just read all your posts. They're all giving you the real deal and it's quite sobbering (no pun intented)

Somehow you're going to have to do something about this which means you may have to take drastic action.

Sending the best of thoughts your way. Pray about what to do, ask for guidance as to the best and proper action and when.

3 moms found this helpful

C.V.

answers from Columbia on

Not your kids, not your house. Save your sanity and mind your own business.

3 moms found this helpful
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R.K.

answers from Appleton on

Any adult who allows under age drinking on their property is responsibile for what happens. The adult can be charged with a felony.

If they are living in your mom's home she should tell them no the kids can't drink here. If they do not comply, they need to move out. I had heard that the property owner can have their home taken from them, but I am not sure if that is correct or not.

3 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Underage kids drinking in her home. How... do they get the booze?

Cops can be called. Anonymously.

Smokes... smokes what? Drugs?
Cops, can be called. Anonymously.

The photos on FB, can be "proof," right?

Then, what about the parents, of those kids, who are drinking in her home??? If something happens, she is liable. AND they are drinking in her home, they are underage, they got booze, and they are drinking against the law. And also, smoking who knows what.
And having sex in her home. And what is the age of consent, in your State?

Then, these kids drive cars. While intoxicated, after leaving her home after partying.

... what is the difference, between her... and a drug dealer or alcohol buyer for underage kids at a convenience store? They get, arrested. The kids and the adult who does it for them.

In my State, the legal age for drinking is 21.
And if someone buys booze for a kid or if the kid uses a fake I.D., they both, get arrested.

3 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

It's too bad your sister is not as afraid of your mom as you were, but it sounds like your sister is going to do what she wants and it's up to your mom whether or not she wants to allow her to live there.
Yes, it's awful that your niece and her friends are allowed to party like that at such a young age, but your mom and sister are adults and must face the consequences of their choices, there's simply nothing you can do about it.

2 moms found this helpful

K.I.

answers from Los Angeles on

I thought the people who supplied the booze would be responsible?

Does your Mother live there too? If she is just the owner and your sister rents, than maybe your Mother would be safe from the liability, not sure?

2 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Do some research. See if the picture is tagged with the kids names. If it is then you turn that child's name in to the local police and tell them that your mom said she didn't care if they were drinking.

She won't even know for sure where the complaint came from. It's on a public social networking place. Anyone who saw the picture could be suspect.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.J.

answers from Seattle on

Don't forget to screen shot the FB pictures... Or once the authorities get involved, they'll already be deleted.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

I don't know the legalities, but I'm pretty sure the one who is held responsible is the parent, not the owner of a home.

I suppose someone could try to sue the homeowner if something happened to an underage child while drinking on their property -- stranger lawsuits have happened.

But I'm pretty sure it's your sister who will be found liable. I don't think there's anything you can do. And the kids are almost 18. I think you should stay out of it.

1 mom found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Contact mom's local police non-emergency line and ask them what to do. Perhaps they can recommend an attorney if needed. Sheesh, some people are just an amazing level of stupid, aren't they?

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D.H.

answers from Louisville on

Talk with the police and ask them what to do, too. This sounds like your mom owns the house but does not live there - then she should tell the neighbors to call the police when these parties happen - and if she has already told them, this may help keep her out of trouble showing she is taking a quick reactive step (not sure you can be proactive except for making them all leave the house)

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