Parenting Books.

I read the book about The Ferber Sleeping Method and it was a HUGE help. Some parents agree some dissagree. I don't think I would have stayed sane without it!!

Hey K.,
If your looking for a good parenting book just pick up a Doctor Seuss or some other childrens book. The best book to ready for your child, are the ones they enjoy. I watch a friend of mine spend a lot of time and money on thoes other books, her little boy didn't seem very happy when she would sit down and try to do the things out of them. Plus, there isn't anything better then just spending time with your kids. Good luck.

Hey! This is such a coincidence. Yesterday I wrote a request on here that talked all about a parenting book that I love, but at the very end I saw that they don't allow that sort of thing. It's considered "spam" if you recommend a certain product! So, I had to delete it, and now I can tell you since you asked!

I LOVE the book "Parenting with Love and Logic". It was recommended to me by a great pediatrician in Denver. In the book, they teach a different perspective on parenting. I'll give you an example. They teach you to use different words with your children so that instead of having total control over them, you're giving them choices and control over their own decisions. Here's one example: Instead of saying "you can't go outside until you pick up your toys" They tell you to say "Of course, you can go outside as soon as your toys are all picked up". Another example (this would be for an elementary or teenager) is if you find that you're having to call your kid to the dinner table over and over before they come, they teach you to walk over to them and get down to eye level and say "We're getting ready to sit down for dinner, and we'd love for you to join us. We'll be eating for the next 20 minutes if you're hungry. If not, we'll just see you there again at breakfast." This way, you're once again giving them the option, but if they choose to not eat, they're not eating until breakfast. The book really does teach you how to handle parenting in a way that is so much less stressful. It's all about changing the way you "talk" to your kids, and about giving them choices. Choices are so good for kids, even as young as 2. It teaches them that they are worthy of choices. It teaches them responsibility. One thing that I learned from it that I use with my almost-5 year old girl is whenever she starts arguing, I say "I love you too much to argue about it". Well, after doing that about 10 times, she realizes that the next timeshe wants to argue and I say it, it's the only response she'll be getting, so she gives up right away. The reason I bought the book in the first place is I felt like I was always telling the kids "no" or that it seemed most of the time I was telling them to stop doing something. I felt like a broken record. What was worse, I felt like the kids were starting to tune me out! He recommended it because of how it puts control in the kids hands to a certain degree, and also because their methods are successful in keeping parents from getting bent out of shape, so he thought it would aleviate my frustrations. Here are a few more examples, just to give you an idea:
Instead of "You are NOT going to your soccer game until you get that lawn finished!!!" say "I'll be taking you to your soccer game as soon as the lawn is cut" Instead of "Don't you talk to me with that tone of voice!" say "You sound upset. I'll be glad to listen when your voice is as soft as mine."

I have to tell you one more that I loved when I read it. Back seat bickering! We all have it! Well, in an example it talks about how two kids started fighting in the car, and so the parents pulled over and told them that while they worked it out, they were going to get out and enjoy some fresh air. Once the noise in the car was gone, the parents got back in. The kids end up fighting again, and the parents start to pull over. The kids tell each other to quiet down because "here they go again". Sure it may take a few times of pulling over, but wouldn't it be great to not have fighting in the back seat? My kids are 3 and 4 so I know how that fighting can be! I got this book when they were 1 and 2. I just recently pulled it back out and it's amazing the things I'm learning for the ages they are now. As you can see, I strongly recommend it to anyone!!

I have "The Baby Book" by Dr. Sears. It's really good. They focus on attachment parenting. If you really aren't into that parenting style, it may not be a good book for you. I use it all the time to check development and things like that. The thing to remember with parenting books is that they appeal to the masses. All of the information is general. I parent by instinct also, but the book is nice to have as a handy refrence. A really good magazine is "Parents." The subscription isn't very much money and it's a great resource. I really think the best resource though is other moms. If you are interested in a book, but don't want to spend the money, check one out of the library. If you like it, you can always buy it.

As with every book, you will find there are exceptions to their opinion. There are also some with misleading or incorrect information. You can never decipher completely. However, reading is knowledge. The more you read they more knowledge you will have. I see it time and time again--the "parents" who never read a book about parenting. They just don't seem to "get it". I always thought I knew what I was doing, never thought I needed a book to tell me. But it's not necessarily that they "tell" you what to do. They just put the information out there and you decide what to do with it. Believe me, now that I have read some highly recommended books on parenting, I have learned SOOO about what to do and not do, best practices in discipline, feeding, sleeping, etc. Some books I will pass along the recommendation for are:
Super Baby Foods by Ruth Yaron. Gives you insight as to when to begin solids, how much to feed at different ages, what foods to feed, what to avoid due to allergies, etc.
Healthy Sleep Habits: Happy Child by Marc Weiss. Offers you several methods to use when ready to have a full nights sleep! :)
Worked for my daughter at 4 months and she is on a great nightly/daily napping routine.

There are a wonderful array of books to choose from, obviously. It never hurts to read someone's ideas! :) Good luck!

To be honest, I have not found too many parenting books that were very helpful. I have found that, with my son, parenting more by instinct works best. I have a friend that relied heavily on parenting books and her daughter missed out on a lot. Now that she is pregnant with her second child, she is doing things totally different. I am not saying that parenting books are bad, but I think it's better to parent more in instinct and use the books as resources that you can adapt to fit your child.

i've not personally read any parenting books, but i love all the magazines for parents. and i love this web site too. you get all sorts of different perspectives for different situations. you just have to mainly go on instinct and trial and error to see what works best for you and your child.