Out-of Town Mom Can't Attend

Updated on March 17, 2008
L.V. asks from Gurnee, IL
16 answers

My cousin is pregnant with her first child, and is due in late November. She lives in Mississippi, however the rest of our (very large) family resides in the Chicagoland area. We want to have a baby shower for her, but her doctor will not allow her to travel due to some complications she was having. I am looking for any suggestions on how we can celebrate her and this exciting time, without her being there.

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A.R.

answers from Chicago on

I love all of the suggestions you have received so far.. and mine is similar. I was thinking she could register someplace online (I was thinking Amazon.com to be specific- you can create a wishlist there.) And then everyone would buy her gifts and have them shipped.... and someone could send her a webcam (this is assuming she can get online at home) and watch her open gifts on the webcam!
Just a thought!
-Amanda

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R.B.

answers from Chicago on

Hmm, that is a tough one. I would say to have a small shower in her honor and send the gifts to her. Obviously your family will understand the doctor's orders for her not to travel. Another suggestion is to have her create an online registry of things she wants for the baby and have "guests" purchase their gifts online and have them sent directly to her.
Good Luck to both you and your cousin!

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N.

answers from Chicago on

Pool all your money and send it to the parents. Let them decide what to spend it on (i.e., open a savings account for the child, buy furniture for the nursery, start a college fund).

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

Hi L.,

Does anyone in your family have a web cam, (and does your cousin have a web cam). If so you could have a virtual shower using the web cams. The other thing you could do is set up a free conference call and have everyone dial in and have a shower over the phone. If you set it up well in advance, everyone could send their gifts to your cousin ahead of time with strict instructions not to open them until the Shower Conference call. If your family here wanted to all be together, you could simply call your cousin on a speaker phone, (that way you wouldn't have to set up the conference call). You can set up a free conference call at: http://www.freeconferencecall.com/

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D.E.

answers from Norfolk on

We have friends over seas that had a internet baby shower. They registered and we participated in a poll to guess the baby's weight, dob, time etc. The invite could include a cute little favor. Good luck, D.

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M.M.

answers from Chicago on

Hi L.,
I am going to a shower this weekend for a mom who is out of town and cannot afford to fly to Chicago. The host asked us to bring an unwrapped gift. She will then video tape us as we "present" our gift to the expectant mom. The host will send the tape to the mom. Luckily for the host, the soon to be grandma is driving to see her daughter and can bring most of the presents. I have never attended this type of shower so I am not sure of the glitches but it sounds great.
Good luck to your cousin!

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S.B.

answers from Chicago on

congrats to your cousin !! How Exciting !1

When i was having my first born, We lived in Colorado. I could not come home. My mom and mom in law threw me a baby shower. Everyone brought their gifts,and wrapped them at the party. They ate, played games, took lots of pictures, wrote in a journal. When my daughter was born, my mom came out and brought all the wrapped gifts. I had my shower.. it was great !! hope this helps.

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A.P.

answers from Chicago on

We once had a "baby shower by mail" and it turned out great! Here are some sites with suggestions for you. Find out where the mom-to-be is registered, and if she is not...then get her husband get her to do it. You can do a theme, or just have everyone pool their presents! If it's easier for all packages to be sent separately, maybe you can find out the address of a close friend/neighbor of hers, have the gifts sent there, and then the neighbors/friends can choose a date when they will show up at her door with all of the presents. Make sure and keep it a surprise!

http://en.allexperts.com/q/Party-Planning-1408/Baby-Showe...

http://www.marthastewart.com/article/baby-shower-by-mail

http://markandtiffblog.blogspot.com/2007/05/mail-shower.html

Good Luck!

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N.O.

answers from Chicago on

Stacy's idea is fantastic. She'll be able to keep the video and share it with the baby when he/she gets older. Very cool idea.

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K.M.

answers from Chicago on

L.:
My sister in law was in the military and stationed overseas and pregnant. Naturally the military would not let her come home for a "baby shower"! So what we did was everyone brought their gifts unwrapped, with their paper, ribbons, etc. We fixed our food, games, etc.We all met together (without mom to be),got out the designated video camera and got it going, each person took turns showing off their gifts, then went over to the designated wrapping table and wrapped their gift. After everyone had shown their gift and wrapped it, we put them all in larger shipping boxes and sealed them up. We went on with the baby shower, eating, playing games etc. all the while video taping it for mom to be. When all was done, the hostess put the video tape in a box with a note and mailed all the packages the next day. My sister in law loved it!!!!! She had so much fun sharing the tape and her gifts with her military girlfriends and my brother. They had their own little baby shower! Enjoy! Have fun anyway!

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D.P.

answers from Chicago on

Hi L.,

We had a similar situation. I don't know if your cousin registered but if she is not, she can do an online registry at babiesrus.com. Then here is what we did:

After you view the registry and pick your item, find the store nearest her home, call them and place a phone order. They can ship it from their store to her house. It will greatly reduce your shipping charges. Some other people just sent her money and gift cards to the stores she wanted too. That is always useful.

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D.V.

answers from Chicago on

Have a shower for her, have someone video tape it and then ask people to get her "gift" cards to the stores she has near her. The shipping of the cards would be minimal. She would love the video and it would be a great reason to have a party and celebrate. It would be a great memory.

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S.B.

answers from Chicago on

I think it would be neat...to do a video of the family celebrating her new upcoming arrival, and then maybe everyone either ship the gifts to her along with the video, or just send gift cards along with the video.

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J.A.

answers from Chicago on

One idea is to do a baby 'sprinkle' where each guest is assigned a week or month and so the mom gets something sent to them every week...maybe Google for more of an explanation on the theme. I've seen it done successfully in an out-of-town situation.

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S.B.

answers from Sioux City on

Have an "In the Mail" shower. My sister did this for a friend who was in another state and bedridden with twins. She sent out shower invitations to friends and family explaining the situation. She instructed everyone to mail their gift between a certain set of dates, so that her friend would receive the shower gifts in the mail (or UPS) over a period of a couple of days. She even included mailing labels in the invitations to use as well as a list of places they were registered at. It was a great success, and because she kept is as a surprise from her friend, she was even more elated to receive such wonderful and thoughtful gifts. And she didn't have to leave the comfort of her home!

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L.

answers from Chicago on

The only thing I can think off is everyone send her the gifts that would have bought for the baby shower. Try to send everything all at once and a throw-away camera. So she can have someone take pix of her while opening the gifts. Or you can wait until the baby is born and have a welcome home shower in Chicago once the doctor gives her the okay.

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