Nursing Would like to Continue But. Son Still Not Sleeping Through the Night

Hello,
I think you are doing a great thing for your son because the World Health organization actually recommends nursing till 2 or 3. I have a 22 month old that I still nurse and I love how secure and happy it makes her. You do need your alone time with your husband because the best thing you can do for your son is show him that you have a healthy relationship with your husband and your husband may start resenting the fact that you two cannot have romantic time together so I guess to please everyone, you could start getting your son to sleep in his own room. It will be very hard at first- this is what I did- I read a book called Sleeping thru the night by Jodi A.Mindell. I set up a bedtime routine(bath, book, song, nurse, put her down). She cried for an hour the 1st ight- I went in every 10 minutes to give her a hug then I would come out and start crying. It was really hard but I felt it was necessary for her to learn to fall asleep on her own. The next night, same routine-she cried for 20 minutes, the 3rd night for 10 minutes and that was it. Once you start this method, do not go back and forth b/c they get worse and since your son is older, it may take longer for him to adjust. So she got her comfort, I got more sleep and more alone time with my husband. I am for the family bed but if you do that, both you and your husband have to come to a mutual understanding of the pros and the cons. I would also suggest joining a playdate group that will be supportive of you and your ideals (like breastfeeding)if you haven't already- it will be good for you to get out and for your son as well.

I know your situation. I have six kids. All breastfed. Family bed. They aren't all in the bed now. They want there own space, eventually. This is what I did when it came time to discourage the nighttime feeding. I got a long nightgown that made nursing seemingly impossible. I explained that this nightgown wouldn't nurse. We replaced the nighttime nursing with lots of cuddling and a rocking chair. The crib is in our room. The baby starts out the night there. The first few nights are rough. He will cry. But he will adapt. Oh yeah. Music is good, too. My youngest daughter loved to fall asleep to music.
It is a gradual process. They don't always stay in their own beds all night, but they start there and you are not the pacifier anymore.

I know this is really long, but I feel like you got a lot (not all) of generic responses that may or may not be helpful. I went through the same thing with my son and this is what I wish someone had told me then. My son nursed to fall asleep and not to "eat". Everyone says "It won't last forever". Well, yeah...but how long is NOT forever? When you are in the moment and you cannot see the end "not forever" is not any comfort. I will tell you how it happened for us and maybe that will help you, my son is now two and a half. I am a co-sleeping, baby wearing, breast-feeding to sleep mother. I knew that I was maybe creating a monster, I read all the books and knew the potential problems. But I loved the together time and everything else about it. I nursed him until he was about 15 months old. By one year he really only looked for it at nap and bedtime so I didn't offer it otherwise. After about 15 months MY attitude changed. I almost hated it because he "needed it" to fall asleep. Sometimes I just felt like screaming "would you STOP sucking on me!". Of course that made me feel guilty because how could I not want that time together, etc. That was when I knew it was time to do something; When it is no longer fun for both of you. I gradually started giving him a sippy cup or bottle at night for as long as he would tolerate it (he would never take a pacifier either). I never offered the breast any more, I made him ask and then did not give it up right away, I'd try distraction. Then I would nurse him for a while, then take it away. I'd let him fuss for a while. I am no good at letting him "cry it out"..ever..so it would probably have been easier if I had let him cry more, but I just couldn't (and still can't) let him cry. I know all the advice, I know he really would be ok if I let him cry. I just can't do it. So, for a few months we just did the give it and take it away routine until he just seemed to stop asking. After that he would seem to want it every now and then especially if he didn't feel good. But I didn't have any traumatic "no more breastfeeding moment." As for sleeping through the night: My son still comes into our room at about 3:30 each night. We just let him into the bed with us because we love it. A few times I have just taken him back to his room and he has slept through the rest of the night just fine. I feel like if I did that consistently he would finally just stay in his own bed. I am ok with the way things went for me. At that time I was incredibly unsure if I was creating worse problems for myself and my son to deal with later. But I decided to not worry about what MIGHT become a problem and just do what felt right then. If we had issues to deal with later, so be it and it would be a note to self for the next one :). For me it has all been a matter of patience. It is extremely hard to give it, take it away, fuss, give it back, over and over and over again. But since I was not willing to let him cry that is all that worked for me. I hope this helps. Hang in there, it gets easier sooner than you think!

I'm so glad to see that you got "positive" response except for Jennifer T! YOU ARE NOT DOING A BAD THING AT ALL!!!!!!!!!! Nursing is one of the best things you can do for your child and you! And you are not creating bad habits at all! Just the opposite actually! If you think about it "WE" even don't STTN, so why would we expect our LO's to STTN! Especially at 12-15-18 months when they are going through so many changes, growth spurts, teething and such! Their world is pretty much being turned upside down, and some have a hard time just sorting it all out! My girls are now two and we still co-sleep. All babies are different and will STTN when "THEY" are ready too. In the mean time we can be there for them and enjoy the snuggles and such! As your LO gets older your nursing relationship does change and it's more of a comfort/security type realtionship more so than a nutritional one. If you go onto kellymom.com you will find tons of support from other EN moms! Keep doing what you feel is best for you and your LO and don't worry about what others say, including family and friends! I know it's hard to at times, but YOU ARE THE MOM AND KNOWS WHAT IS BEST FOR THE TWO OF YOU!!!!!

{{HUGZ}} Hang in there, you won't be nursing and co-sleeping with a teenager! This time only lasts for a couple of years then you'll be wanting this precious special time back! Just continue to follow your LO's lead!

Having a bond with your child doesn't have to involve nursing that is only the first of many bonding opportunities. I think to continue to nurse him when he is only using you as a pacifier is just you trying to hang onto that stage. Basically, you need not feel guilty that this stage is passing, mourn it a little, but think of all the wonderful things to come!!! IF he is only using you to suck while he falls asleep, then indeed you are his pacifier. Nursing is for feeding him his food, yes creating a bond, but mainly for nutrition. I doubt at this age he needs that much nutrition. I know of a famous celebrity that nursed her kid until he was 4, because she was waiting on the kids to stop wanting it. I mean when do they really stop unless Momma's know enough to say stop. I can't imagine a 4yo needing anymore nutrition from the breast at that age. If you are waiting for him to give it up, then you might be waiting for a while. You need to be the mommy and say, well this is enough, you need to work out the pacifier thing and be done with it. And weaning hime may make you feel guilty, but you are a mother now and somethings are just hard for you to do, but necessary none the less. I don't particularly like the family bed because it didn't meet our needs, but I can tell you he will continue to want to sleep with you, when he is older if you don't do something about these things now. You need to help him move through his stages of growth and development, not keep him there becasue it is to hard for you to handle, or wait for him to decide what he wants. He is a toddler almost and they are made to want everything now. You are the mother and are supposed to teach them how to be good human beings and not always think of themselves. So get to it. It will only be harder later.
Good luck,
L.

Oh my God.....you sound so much like me it is unreal!!! Hang in there girl. My son did not start sleeping through the night until he was over a year old. The only difference is that he never slept in our bed. I know how hard it can be. My advice is that if you really want him in his own bed, you're going to have to make the decision and stick with it no matter what. I always said I don't care if I have to get up every few hours, I would not let him sleep with us. Expect it to be hard at first. He is doing something he has never done before. Also, if he wakes up at night, give him a little time to settle himself down before you go in. I will give him ten minutes the first time, next time 15 and so on. Maybe try holding him and walking instead of nursing in the middle of the night. I know that is especially hard when you are so tired! Also, I never would change his diaper in the middle of the night unless it was dirty or leaking. I just felt changing him woke him up too much. I just cake his booty in diaper cream before bed and that is it. We have never had a problem with rashes. Hope this is helpful. Hang in there!! I totally feel your pain!

Hi L.,
I did the same thing you are doing and my daughter started sleeping through the night around 2. She still sleeps with us and I am trying to get her into her own bed now, but it is not easy. I have to get her out of my bed though because I will have my second daughter in September. I wanted to breastfeed for one year and I went two weeks longer because I just loved it, but I had my husband take care of her at night for about 3 or four nights while I slept in another bed when I finally decided to stop breastfeeding. It really helped and my husband was a champ. I kept hearing her cry and he would hold her and give her milk. She continued with the milk, well, until now because from time to time she still wants milk in the middle of the night. I would try to find a way around that. I was learning too and I won't do the same with my next baby. She will sleep in her own bed. I love my daughter in my bed, but I think it is better for them to sleep in their own room. Anyway, sorry it was so long, but I lived the same situation as you and I loved every moment of it. It was more emotional for me to quit breastfeeding than it was for my daughter, not to mention the pain, but it was not bad. My only advise is to do it all at once because if not, you will have more problems. Good luck.

There are some wonderful tips about this very thing in a book called:
"The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Pre-Schoolers" by Elizabeth Pantly.

As long as it doesn't bother you to nurse him, then continue! This is a highly personal choice about how long to continue nursing, and how you handle sleep arrangements. If it works for your family and every one is happy, then it's okay. Just listen to your heart.

I nursed my last child until he was 20 months old, and he didn't sleep thru the night until I finally weaned him. I think that waking up in the middle of the night was just part of his nightly bedtime ritual. Like you, I was hoping he would eventually just lose interest in nursing. I finally got to the point where I was no longer enjoying the nursing and simply felt irritated and then I knew it was time to wean. Weaning proved EXTREMELY difficult. He was so furious with me that I had taken away his favorite comfort. But it only lasted a week, and in the grand scheme of things, that's not such a big deal, although it seems torturous while you do it.

I love the advice from Stephanie & Abby. Don't listen to anyone who says that you should stop doing what feels right for you and your child.

I nursed all 4 of my children and weaned the first at 1 year, because I was listening to others and thought that was what I was supposed to do. It was the hard way. I told myself never again. The next 3, I was more relaxed. They all went through the same stage of nursing that you are describing: nursing 30 seconds at night right before sleep.

Then one day, they'd just forget to nurse. Easy as pie. It happened at 2 years for my girl, 2-1/2 years for my two youngest boys.

Did you know that if YOU are EXPOSED to a virus, the ANTIBODIES that your body makes to fight against the virus will appear in your breastmilk within hours?!!!
Your antibodies will help your toddler avoid catching the current flu or cold going around. So, yes, your son may not need the protein of breastmilk right now, but no one knows what other amazing nutrients he is absorbing - - like antibodies against West Nile virus?? or antibodies against MRSA (the super bacteria)?? or DHA for brain development?? Since no one knows, then no one should say that he's not getting ANY "nutrition" from your breastmilk at this stage of nursing.

Well, this is just my opinion but I think you are going to have to let him put himself to sleep. It sounds as if you are nursing him to sleep and he has gotten used to this. You are going to have to put him in his bed and let him cry until he goes to sleep. It will probabaly take several minutes. (maybe 20 or even 30 minutes or more) You can go in from time to time and let him know you are still there, but he needs to be able to go to sleep alone. You are right in thinking that he is using you for a pacifier at night. If he isn't nursing to actually get much nurishment, then he just wants some comfort. He will probably wake up in the night when he is not sleeping with you as well, but you will have to let him go to sleep on his own again. There isn't a reason I can think of that a 13 month old physically cannot sleep through the night...he just has never had to before. It should only take a few nights of this...a week at most...before he gets the hang of it and realizes you are not coming in to get him. I did this with both my boys at an early age and they both sleep beautifully. I have a 3 month old and a 2 year old. Babies are creatures of habit. They get used to routines and don't like to change. But your son will get used to sleeping on his own if you let him. It will probably be a very hard few days for you, but it will be so worth it when he sleeps on his own and all through the night. Good luck!

P.S. A good tip to keep this from happening with the next baby (if there is one) is to never feed them to go to sleep. Eat, wake, sleep is a great cycle. Then they will have to put themselves to sleep from the beginning and it isn't so hard on you!

Hi L.,

I nursed both of my children and loved it. When i brought them home they stayed in our room until they were 4 months old and then I would get up and go into their room. I wanted them to get used to their room and bed. When their teeth started to come in I stopped nursing. Understand that most everything about a babys comfort is trained and is or becomes a habit. Your boy isnt going to wake up and not want to nurse and he is waking up at night needing to be soothed so yes you are a pacifier which is not restful for either one of you. he is a baby he doesnt know what is good for him and you have to help him break habits no matter how hard as gently as you can. It is hard but you can do it and he wont even remember it this time next year. do you remember anything at that age? It is ok for him to cry as long as he is not hurting, or hungry and all the necessitys are covered, this is where you start becoming a parent and you set who makes the rules, him or you. If you give in because he cries you are going to have a long road ahead of you. I would have your husband soothe him at night it may take a little longer and he may cry harder because he wants to be nursed but if you are consistent after a week it should be all over. During nap time pat him on the back and tell him their is no more milk when he wants to nurse soothe him until he falls asleep dont give in because you will confuse him and that is mean so if you commit to this be strong and get your husband to help. He will survive a few sleepless nights mine did. If you make good choices now it gets easier the older they get if not you will be frustrated! Good luck you can do this!

L.,

First of all, I want to address the lonely part. I don't know if you work or not, but there are tons of moms clubs to get involved in. They do acticities that you and your son can both enjoy, and you get the companionship/friendship that you need while you're staying home.
Secondly, to address the sleeping issue. I am not a proponent of the family bed and/or nursing after the age of 1 (meaning, I didn't do it) but if that is what works for you, then I say go for it. However, it is difficult to have the best of both worlds if you choose to share your family bed AND have your son sleeping through the night. You are creating some bad habits that are going to be even more difficult to break the longer you continue to do it. Nursing him back to sleep in the middle of the night is your baby controlling you. He doesn't need the nourishment, so therefore, you're giving your 1-year old control. It's going to be much more difficult to establish yourself as the authority figure as he grows into a toddler even more if you're allowing him to be in control at this age.
My best advice to you is: Begin to put him in his own bed and establish a consistent bedtime routine (you MUST stay consistent with bed time and routine). I understand that nursing is a matter of choice, but if I were in your shoes, I would stop. He doesn't need it any longer and I have seen and heard of many differing ill-effects that prolonged nursing can bring.
A friend of mine just called me the other day and said her son wouldn't take naps (she was still nursing him at 18 months old). I gave her the same advice that I'm giving you and she called me a week later and told me what an incredible difference it made! He was taking great naps and sleeping through the night. She and her husband got their relationship back and they now have a very well-rested and happy baby boy.
I wish you the same luck!
-K.

You're my twin! (except I'm 28 and have an almost 14 mo. old...)Mine sleeps mostly through the night. Everyone has their off nights, and I still nurse him (when he wakes up in the morning, nap time, and bed time). What we had to do is for about a week, whenever BB woke up in the middle of the night, hubby went and got him, quieted him down, and BB would go back to sleep. Stinks for daddy (rocks for mommy!), but considering you've been getting up for 13 mos, your hubby can deal with it for a week! Mine won't sleep in bed with us, so I don't know what to say about that. If you put him in the crib in your room, I would recommend putting the blankets over your head so your baby won't see you (some people might laugh, but that's what we had to do when BB was sleeping in the pack in play in our room...it works!) Good luck!

Just something to consider... when your son is too big for the crib (which can be anytime- just as soon as he tries to climb out on his own) it will become VERY hard to teach him to sleep alone in his bed because he won't stay in it. I would advise getting to that as soon as you can because it will just become exponentially more difficult as he gets bigger.

You can try to get him attached to a blanky or toy as a security object so maybe he won't use you as a pacifier. My daughter hugs her blanky and sleeps very well by herself in her room (she's 14 months) for 10 to 12 hours each night.

I do not have any helpful info. but maybe my story will help motivate you.
So... My husband and I did the same thing... we had a family bed and I nursed forever!!!! My youngest is almost 3, still not sleeping through the night, and still in our bed (no longer nursing thank God lol!!!). Do you want a 3 year old who is not sleeping through the night and still in bed between you and your hubby???? Good luck!!!

My son slept with us til he was 4. He nursed til he was 17 months old. Same story. My mother in law was disturbed by this. Not that it was any of her business but I decided to ask my pediatrician and she gave me the best advice: don't quit til you and the baby are ready. My son is now 10 years old and we still have a great relationship. He comes to me about everything and he feels comfortable with everything he has to discuss with me. Just remember that they are only little for a short time. He will not nurse forever or sleep with you forever. Granted it was a little harder to wheen my daughter. She was 18 months old, now she's 7. But my children know that they are always welcome in my bed. They only come when they truly need me, but the important thing is they feel comfortable with that. Good luck!

You love for him to be so close to you at night, and HE loves for you to be close to him, too. Moms ARE human pacifiers! I believe that's why God made our bodies the way they are.

Moving from your bed to a crib or his own room will be a big adjustment for you both. If it is what you need to do, then do it gradually and with love.

You don't have to stop nursing! Find a support group for mom's with nursing toddlers. We're out there!

Some kids just don't sleep through the night until later, no matter what you do. He may not be waking b/c he's hungry, he just doesn't know how to go back to sleep yet. I would fill him up on solids before bed (something heavy like a peanut butter sandwich), then nurse, and just let him cry when he wakes. It'll be hard, but if you leave music on in his room and maybe your's you can drown out some of it. I did this at the request of my dr and it has worked. My son was still waking at 15 mo a couple times at night and it was just b/c he didn't know how to self soothe back to sleep. Sometimes you have to make them learn that, they don't always just learn it on their own. Good luck!!!! And there's NO reason to wean!

Please do NOT listen to someone who tells you that you have chosen bad habits for your child. Your choices may not be the same as theirs, but that does not automatically mean that they are bad. One thing that a lot of family bed people do is to put the crib mattress (or a twin bed) on the floor next to your bed (which can also be on the floor, if you like). That way you can lay with the child in his/her own bed to help them fall asleep and then you can move to your own bed. This worked just fine for us with both kids.

Both my 2nd and 3rd child didn't sleep through the night until we put them in their own bed. My mother kept saying I bet if you put them in their crib they will sleep through the night and sure enough, they slept 10-12 hours from then on. They were younger than your son though so there may be a different component involved now. However, I am all for letting your babies sleep with you. For me it is harder when they are so little, I enjoy having my older ones sleep with me. They LOVE to snuggle and i think it is great bonding time. Once we put the 2 oldest in their beds they didn't get back in bed with us until after 1 1/2 years of age and now they are sporadic. As far as time alone with your husband we let the kids fall asleep in our bed and then move them to their bed (this is the 2 oldest ones, not the baby). At some point in the middle of the night our 4 year old almost always ends up back in bed with us. Hope that helps.

M.

Hi L.,
I am certainly no expert, but I am an expert nurser! I have 2 kids and nursed for 5 years straight! They are 2 years 5 months apart. Everyone said the milk would change and my older one would stop but she didn't and as soon as the baby was born she said it was for him...we had been saying that to her for weeks before his birth. Anyway, breast fed babies do wake during the night because our breast milk is not so thick and filling as formula. Right now while you are in it I know it is so hard...sleep deprivation is the worst. The only thing I can suggest for that is to take a nap during the day while he does. As far as you and your hubby...that too happened here. My best advice there is to try your hardest to remember you were his first. I always thought that while my husband wanted me my babies NEEDED me so he would have to understand. Well, I have since come to learn the hard way that our hubbies do NEED us too, only in a different way. Not to sound gruff, but I was always TOO tired for him, but I made the effort for the babies. I would tell him to just come on and let's hurry (you know when I mean) so I could get to sleep. He is very sensitive to my needs and didn't feel appropriate doing that so he ended up suffering and it did affect our relationship. Please try to make time with him a priority. This man has given you the single most important thing in your life...that angel baby that sleeps in your arms every night...not to mention his love and support! At 13 months it will be hard to wean! Really encourage his eating solids at the evening meal and then give him a filling snack before bedtime. Also take him outside to play and wear him out so he will be too tired to wake up after only a few hours. Also really quick, just because you are only getting 2 oz out when you pump, he may be getting more as their mouths draw the milk more easily...do you still fell it let down...if so he is getting plenty. If not, you are right you are his paci...not a bad thing to be to your little one. My babies are now 9 and 6, but I wouldn't change a thing about the way they both nursed for 2 1/2 years.
It is a time you can never have back and it makes the bond you have with them oh so strong. Good luck with every thing and make sure you take care of hubby too.

When I was reading about your problem I thought you were my SIL. She has a girl though. She is always in the same exact boat as you. Her doctor said to take everything away one by one. She is first taking the boob/paci away at night time bed. She lets her cry it out to fall asleep. She hates it too. Then she'll adventually take the night time feeding away. Which she doesn't even think it's about the milk as much. She feels she is a pacifer, too. Her baby also sleeps with them. Good luck!!

My youngest son would never take a bottle. I loved the connection as well, but we never did the co-sleeping in the same bed, we did have a cradle next to the bed. He slept much better when we moved him out of our bedroom. You son probably goes to a lighter sleep stage, smells you and wants to nurse even though he's really not hungry. I would suggest co-sleeping during the nap - MOM's need naps too. (At least I did) and get him to not sleep with you at night. That way you remove "his pacifier" and he might sleep thru the night.

Its a tough choice and hard to make a decision when you are enjoying what you are doing so much. Don't fret about it and do what feels natural. You can try sleeping in another room for one night and see what happens. If it works then you know its your close proximity and decide what you want to choose. You could even give him your finger to suck on instead of a paci - or find a different paci he might not like the one you have.

Good luck!

If you use the pacifier only at nap and night time, to be able to wean him from nursing, whats the harm?? If you like the bonding time, you could rock and hold him with the pacifier until he falls asleep, and then put him in his bed. You owe it to your husband to let him start learning to sleep in his own bed. They will use you for a pacifyer, after there is not milk at all probably until forever sometimes. If he cries a bit, because he still wants to nurse, it isn't going to hurt him, believe me, and it won't last long. I think you are having to wean yourself as much as him ha

I hate to say but you are his pacifier.He wakes during the night is out of habit.Sorry to say I went through the exact same things with my son.He didnt sleep alnight till I brought my daughter home from the hospital and at that time he was 4. First night he went right to his room and slept through the night.Needless to say I didnt make that mistake with my second.If you decide to stop breast feeding you can either call your Dr. or go the old fashion way by placing raw cabbage leaves on you breast.Dont ask how but it does work.It will dry your milk up and then he want feed I dont recommend a pacifier because you will just be replacing yourself with something else to break him of.Dr. say that when they reach a year their memory banks get stronger everyday and to take them off the bottle with no replacements.Good Luck and you will find you are not in this boat alone.

Honey--
You nurse that baby as long as you want to. It is SO good for that baby. He's not going to go kindergarten nursing.
You are improving his immune system for years to come. Yea for you!
Nursing babies do things bottle fed babies don't. It is just fine. My babies nursed past a year and were in our bed at times. Both have transitioned to their own rooms. They are just fine. A secure and confident child is a good thing.
He will sleep through the night soon. I can't give you a specific thing to do because all of us are different. You just have to figure out what is best for your family. You'll know when to wean him and when to move him to the crib.
There will probably be a few tears in the process, but with most changes there are.
The best advice I can give you is to do what your instincts tell you and not other people.
You sound like a good mama!!

You are causing problems for your self.
He should be in his own bed. He is old enough to be weined from his mother. Try the Pacifer while he is laying close to you for awhile and then put him in his own bed.
Good luck.
MK

Hi L., If you are in the Arlinton area you are welcome to joing the mommy group I am a member of. It is the Arlinton Mommy Meetup group. Go to meetup.com to finde it. There are always a ton of activities to choose from. There are currently quite a few mommies with infants. Also, you are welcome to attend the breastfeeding support group I attend. It is called For Babies Sake and meets every Tuesday night at 7p. WE meet at the South Arlintgon Church of Christ at 830 Eden Rd. Arlintgon,Tx 76001. It is free and is led by a professional lactation consultant.

As for the breastfeeding. You can still keep breastfeeding, so no worries! In fact good for you. It is still so good for him. www.kellymom.com has some great articles on breastfeeding and nursing toddlers (extended breastfeeding) There are all kinds of possible solutions. You sometimes have to get creative for "alone" time with your dh. I've learned this is even more true the older your children are and the more you have! If having your son sleep in your room is really important, then just find new places for your "alone" time in the house after he's in his crib. If you don't think it will bother you too much, go ahead and move his crib to another bedroom. I would recommend creating some sort of nighttime routine when putting him to bed. I don't think it will be detrimental to let him cry a bit at this age to teach him to go to sleep on his own, but you know your baby so go with your gut. I could never get my son to lay in his crib unless he was already asleep. We tried cry it out, but it never worked. My daughter, who is now 15 months is a different story. We did the cry it out for a couple of nights (cried for about 30, 20, then 5 or less) to a week before she was fine with it. I did this when she was about 11 months old. I can now lay her down for a nap or bed, while she's awake no problem. My kids are just different in that way. That is why I say go with your instincts on this.

As for sleeping through the night, it is normal for children to wake up through the night. It is normal for them to look to mommy and nursing for comfort. He is old enough to go without nursing though now or very soon probably. YOu just have to not go and nurse him, which will be much harder if he stays in the room with you.

Good luck and don't despair!

Ps. stopping nursing (weaning) won't mean he'll start sleeping through the night.

my daugher didnt sleep through the night until she was 12 months old. we too have a family bed! she stopped waking up through the night when she was done nursing. i have no words of advice because our weaning was simple! she got rsv and couldnt breath well enough too nurse.. sad but true!!

i also have a 15 month old son who is still nursed and does not sleep through the night. its really driving me crazy but i cant see it changing anytime soon! he is a special needs child and is mainly breastfed - he doesnt eat enough as it is so if he starts sleeping through the night he will lose weight!

good luck in your journey for sleep! wishing i had some soon :)

I didn't read all the responses but I am going to guess you had some very differant opinions.
I will say getting him out of your bed and night weening at the same time could kind of be alot, or the first might solve the 2nd.
You only have a problem if you think it is one, or well if your husband thinks it is.
We put our girl to bed in her crib and then when she wakes at night she comes in with us. Sometimes she stays and sometimes my husband moves her back to her bed. He is the one that doesn't want her there, so he can be the one to move her.
Do you have a guest room? That is a great place to enjoy each other while the baby sleeps in his crib in your room.
Neither of my boys slept thru the night until I stopped nursing them to sleep.
I put the oldest one on a water bottle around 18mos and he began sleeping thru the night with in about a month. The 2nd I just waited till he was 2 and then we were done nursing all together and he began to sleep thru the night.
I don't know what I will do with this one, she is almost one and still wakes twice to nurse, however the 2nd time is around 6am so some could argue that isn't a night waking, but she will go back to sleep and sleep another 2 hours or so...
Good luck and go enjoy your husband.

I envy you for being able to breast feed as long as you have, I was unable to do it for that long. Just remember, you know your child, you know what he wants, you are doing the best for him. Most great apes breast feed their children for the first 5 years, and humans frown on it for longer than the first year, even bottle feeding. We also kick our kids out of our beds, when they need us most. My boys both slept in our bedroom (they are now 10 1/2 and 8 years old.) They started sleeping by themselves (first together) at the age of 4. My husband and I loved being so close to our kids, they are only young once, why do we insist on making our kids grow up faster than they already do. Yes, my husband and I would get tired of the kids in our bed, and no we did not divorce or fight about it. But, we survived it, we would rather sleep than get up all night long trying to keep the kids in their bed! If you have no problem with him in your room and your husband has no problem with it, then do whatever you think it right for your family, and ignore everyone else. And if you and your husband need some alone time, go to the living room and leave the baby in your bed!