Not Sure What to Do with These Feelings... (W/clarification)

This sounds like it's more you than him. You feel bad because you guys are struggling with money and you arent contributing. Your whole post sort of beats you up, so if you dont like yourself you are figuring he doesnt like you either.
Get a job if that's what it takes to make you feel better, and if you are making enough to support yourself and you guys don't get back to normal, at least you will feel confident that you can go on without him.
It's all about being dependent on someone else, you dont feel comfortable with it, you feel trapped. He's tired of watching you mope and moan about it.
Get your job, put a smile on your face and start over and reinvent your marriage to make it more secure for both of you.
Gotta love yourself C. or no one else will.

Get help. You aren't communicating and if you had all the money in the world you might fight less, but you wouldn't be more secure in your relationship. Financial troubles just rub the shine off the marriage. You have to work to make your marriage work and that starts with communication. The things that he said may very well have been said in anger and more fluff than substance, but a kernel of truth in them may be what's bothering you. Your financial issues are a separate issue than your relationship, but working on either will help the other. You are headed for misery or divorce if you do nothing, it won't fix itself.

Sorry you feel so sad :( Can you supply more info? Do you have kids? Is he working? What was your previous job? What are you jobs' that have failed (did you invest money in some promising money maker that didn't pan out?). Just need a few more details to try and see where he is coming from and where you are at.
*HUGS*

First of all, it sounds like you are an entrepreneur at heart. Never give that up! It is a drive some of us have - and even if you try to suppress it, it will keep rearing it's creative head! You can't hold down that beast for long... trust me.

I am sorry your husband doesn't support your way of thinking. That makes it very difficult to be yourself. Have you tried sitting down and telling him how it makes you fee to create a business? Sure, you may not have succeeded financially yet; but all of the great successful people in history have been great failures before they became known for the success that now surrounds them.

You now are trying to get a "real" job (ick - I hate that term!) This will allow you to bring money into the marriage that previously wasn't there. Maybe he feels the pressure of providing for the family, and that is why he is so angry. But I promise you, as a creative entrepreneur, even after you start a new job, you are going to get an idea one day soon that you are going to want to pursue. You have to follow that idea, or you wouldn't be staying true to yourself.

Some people just don't *get* entrepreneurial thinking. They see it as being "lazy" and a "waste". They may not get it for now, but when you start making money from it - THEN they will be happy.

I suggest just explaining why you enjoy doing the things you do to your husband. Tell him that you are willing to try a traditional job; but you simply will have to go after your next idea. This will make you both happy!

Something to think about... can you teach your idea on the weekend at community classes? How about being a coach in the field of your liking? Perhaps, if you create tangibles, you can sell them on craigslist and ebay? The holidays are coming - you can rent booth space and sell your item/service... The ideas are limitless! Email me back if you want any suggestions - THIS is what I love to do! :)

You don't mention what hurtful things were said, but you did say they were said in a heated moment (after an emotional "pop"). Did you ask your husband after you were both calmer if he really meant those hurtful things or if he just said them in anger? Did he apologize for the hurtful things he said? Have you talked to him about your insecurity? You mention that you didn't communicate enough in the past so I would venture to say that is something you really need to work on.

My husband and I have been married over 17 years and I know the most important thing that has kept us together is meaningful communication. We both say things from time to time that are hurtful, but when we are calm, we apologize and communicate what we "really" meant in a constructive way.

I think you need to talk to your husband, clear the air, and let him know what you need to feel secure in your relationship again. That will probably require some sincere introspection on your part first, but after you figure those things out, communicate them to your husband and work together to find a solution. No one here can make those feelings of insecurity go away. That's something you and your husband will definitely have to work through together.

Blessings,
N.

Get some marital counseling together then decide. You owe it to the baby to do so. IF he won't go then do it yourself then decide how you feel. Good luck with this.

It's sad when a woman's worth is based upon her earning power. That isn't the way God meant for it to be. Get counseling. There's more going on here than mere money. A real and healthy relationship isn't based upon one's ability to bring home the bacon.

you sound like the boat I just got out of a depression due to no work and not getting out enough. I think unconciously due to the depression I tried to drive him away. why I have no idea to see if he really loved me maybe. I bet your doing the same thing and not reaizing it. hes not going to feel secure about you until you do. set up a romantic candle light dinner for the 2of you homemade is as good as take out. or better.ship the kids to a friend or grandma for the night and you will know if the feelings are there for you or not. get creative make a weekend for the 2 of you alone and see what happens.

So....it seems like you feel insecure about hubbys feelings for you because of financial issues?
Easy fix! Since over 50% of divorces happen b/c of money issues, you need to get a handle on yours so YOU can decide how best your money works instead of the tail wagging the dog, so to speak.
I cannot recommend Dave Ramsay enough. It saves marriages, credit and saves families. Easy to follow plan. When you feel "in charge" of your money, there is a feeling of security. Maybe if the financial issues go away, your insecurity will too? Good luck!