There's the brand Orgran, which sells No Egg, which is wheat-, nut-, and dairy-free. It's good for pancakes, French toast and baking (see below about wheat-free), as long as the recipe doesn't call for a large percentage of eggs for its ingredients (it won't create the volume that you need in that case; it just provides the binding quality of eggs).
Some soy and rice milks are really good (I prefer them over cow's milk). Some are chalky. You'll just need to try out a few brands till you find one that you like. It's not a matter of finding what comes closest to the dairy flavor; soy doesn't try to taste like cow's milk. It's its own thing, more of a clean, nutty flavor. It's more a matter of finding one that you like in its own right.
As for wheat, you'll find at the health food stores that there are plenty of wheat- and gluten-free breads, pancake mixes, other baking mixes, and other products. There are also various types of flour that you can experiment with if you like to cook and bake, and/or just want to make your own cheaper versions of these ready-made products.
Little kids might reject a food over and over again, and one day decide to try it. If they can't relate it to some other taste experience that they're familiar with, they might not like it the first time they try it. This doesn't mean they'll never like it, or won't like it next week. It's a survival trait - prevents poisoning or other illness. Their bodies are testing it out just a little at a time. Later, they might try it and something in them says, "oh, I know this thing. It's safe because I didn't get sick the last time I had it." So just keep offering lots of variety. That's healthy for them, anyway!
Oh - but don't become a short-order cook. That becomes a power play for kids. You can ask him in advance what sorts of things he wants, and go with that, but if he changes his mind and refuses it when you set it down for him, don't go get him something else. The idea is that they have to eat what you offer them, or else they'll have to wait till snack-time later. If you offer him lots of very healthy things on his plate, he'll eat enough of what he does like in order to fill up, or even if he doesn't eat as much as you'd like to see him eat, at least he's got lots of nutrient-dense foods in his body to keep him going till snack time (where you feed him really healthy snacks, too. If he thinks of them as snacks, given to him away from the food fight at the table, it's easier to slip in lots of healthy things, which will balance out a barely-touched "actual meal"; it's not at all about what he eats at the table only).
Good luck!
L.