There were problems years ago with certain hormonal drugs, but there have been many advances and adjustments since then.
There are also fantastic results with a number of food-based supplements and I work with a large number of women who have done great with patented products (which guarantees the ingredients on the label are inside the product). A lot of them are breezing through menopause now, and seeing dramatic changes. There are also healthy, safe products for stress reduction and increased blood flow to the brain, helping with focus.
There are also things like stress reduction, therapy, yoga, relaxation techniques and more. Have you looked into any of those? You should start with a professional, not just sit and home and try to guide yourself into deep breathing - that doesn't work when someone is already compromised or in crisis.
Making a decision out of fear now leaves you with far worse health risks - stress, anxiety and lack of sleep. Too many women in your situation are letting not-so-rational fears put them into a situation where they have increased strain on the heart, the risk of driving while sleep-deprived, and unable to repair their bodies during deep, restorative sleep. How does that make sense?
Sometimes we get ourselves into such a state of anxiousness and exhaustion that we no longer have good decision-making abilities.
There is a lot of support out there, and a number of routes you can choose. Please start with the person you trust the most - doctor, counselor, best friend who will go with you and help you sort out options or combinations of methods.