Hey A.! wow lots of little ones running around in your home. It sounds like "nap times" are your only moments of relaxation or quiet. I'm with you on the naps. I think all little people should have a tight nap schedule if at all possible. I am sitting with a 3 yr old neice who turns 4 this month! She goes to nap directly after her lunch also. By 1:00 p.m. she is laying down, no television on, but with music for sleeping. I play at a very low volume some relaxation music for her. She loves it! By the middle of the second song she is knocked out completely! Grant it, she only sleeps for an hour now but it's an hour of tranquility for me. I can anything I want during that hour and beleive me I use it well. Sometimes I also lay down, sometimes I eat my own lunch without having to jump up for any reason; sometimes I read or iron. I do what I couldn't do while she was awake and full of questions while following me around the house! It's like being in heaven and I'm not talking about a difficult child. She is a doll but curious about everything and quite intelligent!
As for your 4 yr old, things do change once they go to preschool. I recall when I was teaching, the 4 yr olds no longer were required to nap. While at home the rules are "yours" to enforce. My suggestion to you is to insist that she lay down. EVen if she doesn't fall asleep, she must be quiet while laying down for no less than 1.5 hours. That's cutting in half her old nap schedule and plenty enough time for her body to recuperate some energy.
Play some quieting baby music or relaxation music for them while they rest. She may surprise you by falling asleep with the soothing sounds of the music. My little ones also enjoyed the rain sounds, crickets, etc when they slept. With my neice I use music because it works well with her personality.
Give it a chance to function for you. You'll be pleasantly surprised! Good Luck and May God Bless you and your lovely family.
sincerely,
denise maria
Queretaro, Mexico