Nanny Needs Advice

Hi K.,

I am a Certified Professional Nanny, and I ALWAYS was paid when the family was on vacation. The policy was, if I was willing to work, I was paid for that week.

You are their employee, and as such, they must either provide you with proper notice if there will be a "forced" time off OR pay you for your time.

If their kids were in day care, the day care provider would expect the be paid that week to "hold" their kid's spot.

While I'm sure you love the kids, I doubt (based on experience), you'll work out a compensation package with the family. I think it's time to look for a new job.

When ever I was hired at a new position, I insisted on a contract that stated my vacation/days off and if I was not needed (ie Mom wanted the kids for the day), that I was paid as if I worked. My contract also stated I needed 4 weeks notice if I was to have "unpaid" time.

FYI- one of my Mom's was on materity leave, I rarely worked but was paid fully for all days.

It's a matter of respect and what's right.

Good Luck.

R. Magby

Do you have it in writing? the specifications of their "demands" and your employment with them?

They are jerks.
Sorry.
They have no respect for your dedication... and after THREE years with them.

Did they pay for your medical?
Do they claim you on their taxes?
Do you have a tax license?
* EDIT: (If you do not... then, make sure they do not hold it against you.. nor try to 'threaten' you about it and say you are working under the table and not paying your taxes etc.).

Ultimately, I would think that you'd have an 'employee' contract with them.. and your working with them should be specified.
If things were only word of mouth and verbally told to you from the beginning... then they have now, changed their tune.

They have really 'demanded' a lot of you and your life... and even asking you to give up teaching dance etc.
Whoa.

I don't know what the laws are....

I would, find another employer....

Anytime you want to tell them something, put it in writing from now on. ALSO, put it in writing, what their demands of you were and how you DID do that.... ie: that you only work for them, giving up Teaching Dance etc. EVERYTHING you wrote here in your post.
DOCUMENT what they tell you as well and their actions.

all the best,
Susan

If you wan tto work for her I'd do just this charge her like a deposit....prek's do it and so do daycare's it's like this and I've had sitter's do this as well;

Say it's 100.00 dollars a week you charge....you need $100.00 for that week in advance so before you watch johnny you have your money and she's going to have you watch him.

Also at a prek I went to they charged lets say $100 dollars a month I had to prepay for the month in advance then I also had to put up a deposit so that if I left before giving them a 30 days notice they still had a months that was prepaid while they call other parents to let them know there's an opening.

Look you are running a business being a Nanny treat it like one. i can tell you this my niece takes her kid to a daycare and she pays before the week starts (period!) Also at a daycare if they pick up kids after school lets say they had in a monthly charge say it's 100 a week and $30 for driving the kid somewhere.

Also check out a website you may have some real luck on sittercity.com yes some hospitals give a membership to their doctors and nurses to use it. Check it out I bet you will like it and become a sitter on it. I'd not work for her without using a contract I'd tell her if you just have to go back that you are making time for her since she's a special client. I'd give her a copy of the contract and tell her it's a new policy in your business you have to have a contract...get a copy from a few daycare's near buy and use some of their wording. If you can move on from her and let it go...

Best wishes I hope you get another job and don't need to be her victim .....please check out sittercity.com

I hate to sound like a jerk, but it sounds like you should have something in writing to give to your potential employers so that this doesn't happen again. The reason your being taken advantage of is because your not thinking of yourself as a business. My suggestion is for you to brain storm things that are important to you and write them down such as a week or so vacation paid after 1 year of employment, maybe you can also add that you require atleast 2 weeks notice if the family is going on a vacation if they do not give you atleast that then you will be compensated for the entire time they are on vacation. Try to list things some of the extra things that you do to such as running errands, laundry, dishes etc as well as your requirements. Get them to sign it if you feel comfortable doing so. I'm sure if you have something like this to present to your potential employer they will treat you as a professional and not a servant. I feel so bad I hear in your post that this was shocking and hurtful. You seem to come across as a very sweet and kind person. Just cover yourself and I would definately look for another job. Sounds like things have gotten to an uncomfortable place. Good luck to you!! You'll find a family you click with, you sound great!
Jen

As a nanny myself, I would say, GO TO YOUR LOCAL NANNY AGENCY, and SIGN UP!!! I can't believe how AWEFUL your family treats you. I worked for one family years ago when I first started, who were like this...and I only stayed there 3 months...let alone 3 YEARS!!!

Go to a nanny agency, many are GOOD at being up front with a potential family. I know here in MI, they require families to offer a minimum of: 2 weeks paid vacation (1 at the nanny discretion, 1 at the family), sick days, and most encourage families to take out taxes too. The family I work for pays me 52 weeks/year, I am paid no matter how many days/week I am needed. Nanny jobs are JUST as important as the jobs the parents we work for do...

I am sorry to hear that you are in such dire straights.

My question is: do they think you are their nanny or their babysitter?

A babysitter gets called and paid as needed. They may or may not only work for just one family. They are free to turn down a call to work and will still get called again. They get no extras or benefits.
A nanny is a regular employee with set duties, hours, pay, etc. Even though hours may flex, you are expected to be available anytime needed within your agreed upon hours. Many nannys live-in and get regular days off.

After reading your letter, it's plain that this family wants you to drop everything when they need you and don't care if you are able to put food on your own table or keep a roof over your head. If it were me, I'd look for a new family to work/care for.

A good nanny is a pretty valuable commodity in today's world for more affluent families. Market yourself, do a good job search, and when you meet prospective families, make your conditions known in advance. Let them know that there will be a contract. You should have a set salary, whether or not they need you on a certain day, and paid vacation like any other employee. If they expect you to drive, you should be compensated for expenses of gas and upkeep, insurance, etc. Other duties like cleaning need to be spelled out clearly. You know what your needs are, spend some time getting them on paper and have someone help you generate a contract.

Good Luck and I hope you get a better employer soon!

I have a sitter that comes to care for my kids during the week. She does not get paid when she can't come because she has an appt or I am off due to holiday or vacation day. That is what was agreed on when she was hired. BUT I think they way you are treated is appalling. You are not respected at all. I am surprised you have been with them that long. Every week or maybe a little longer I ask how the kids behave for her and any problems. I expect al of them to respect her completely. They do not yell at her or anything like that and know for a good fact that they would be in extreme trouble if they did. I would tell this mom goodbye. If you decide to watch the LO, set the rules. They should have given at least a few weeks notice before going on vacation and leaving you without pay. If you have an appt, you should be able to keep it. You are taken advantage of and disrespected. Good luck with your plans. If you find another family, defintely set things in place before you start.

Hi, I'm a nanny too and I can relate to you for this thing recently happened to me. Last year I said I'm not working for a week and they don't have to pay me because its my choice to have a week off..then after six months they went for a week vacation and they didn't pay me for a week they where gone. And before that happen I told him that I will use that week off too as my one week vacation that they promise me but it seems that they forgot about what we talked about and doesn't want me to have a one week vacation with pay. To make the story short they didn't pay me considering it's my one year working for them. Some employers are just so cheap paying a nanny but very demanding in many ways. If they don't need you now they just don't care about you, but if they need you they pretend that you're very important person to them ;) isn't just so funny and selfish?? Well all I can say is find a different job and leave these selfish people. And during the interview on your second job just make a list of questions you want to ask them about your, holiday with pay, over time, vacation, if they're gonna pay you if they leave , give you notice if not so you could find a part time job etc.

It's very easy to be indifferent of the financial burden and time restraints on you impose on others when you have never been the one to be in need. Sorry but your employers are lousy people. Unless you have a contract with these people or something in writing detailing how you are to work, when you are to work, and how you are to be paid, I don't think you have any recourse against them. What I would suggest you do is make nice with them and really get your resume out there to try to look for another job. I'm not sure if there is anything you can do to resolve this situation in your favor but I do think it is in your best interest just to pretend like nothing is wrong because you really can't afford to lose this job before you are ready to move on. It won't do you any good to make them feel so uncomfortable that they will want to fire you without notice.

During the time that you are making nice with this couple and actively interviewing for another position, see if you can get your hand on a sample employment contract that you can modify that will state all of the terms of employment that you feel are acceptable for your next job. And you may want to consider positioning yourself for another similar line of work that will give you greater stability and more reasonable work conditions.

Good luck to you on this.

Wow, well, I have a live in a nanny and only one child and would NEVER do this to her. I don't really have any advice other than for all future nanny jobs you take on, PLEASE make sure to discuss these things and have a written contract before you start work. We actually don't have a written contract with our nanny, but she we pay her regardless of whether she works or not. In six months, she's taken one vacation where she was gone for three days. She asked us a month in advance, and my husband and I coordinated our work schedules and asked our family to help us out those three days. We did not change her pay, nor would we. We also pay for her gas and any expenses she incurs while caring for our child. There have been days during that time where my husband or I have been off work so she technically wasn't in charge, but we do not change her pay. She gets the same amount, every two weeks. I think that's only fair.

Write up a contract. Bring it to her. Tell her that you would be willing to work up a contract with your concerns and hers in mind. Everything should be in writing. Just tell her, I love working for your family but I have some concerns and I would like to discuss them with you and here they are ....

I don't think there are necessarily laws against a lack of notice for working/not working with nannies. I would suggest you look at your contract, if you have one, to see if things are spelled out specifically with regard to notice and paid time off or not. Now that I think of it, I do not have a contract with our nanny but she is also told me I am very good at making sure she is getting enough hours and I am also accomodating for her with time off. She has told me some bad stories where other employers tried to take advantage of her.

There are places out there that can provide free or reduced cost legal advice. Google "free legal advice" in your area and I am sure you will come up with a number of possibilities to try. However, if you don't have a contract I would suggest you start looking for another job if at all possible. When searching for a nanny, I had good luck at gonannies.com and many potential care providers at care.com---these are nationwide companies where you can list your profile for free or at a limited cost. I would also make sure you are able to have the terms of employment listed in writing. I have found it best if all expectations were stated up front leaving little room for conflict later on.

Best wishes.

I didn't read what everyone else wrote. But here's my quick story.
I am also a nanny, also have been with this family for 3 years! I have never been paid for the family vacations, ever. I do not get sick days, for myself or for the kids when they get sick. I have been called in the morning and told not to come because work has been cancelled for the husband. I do not get vacation, nor do I get gas money or anything else. I have not had a raise in the 3 years I have been with this family. The beginning of this year was very hard because the husband was out of work for almost 3 months...I worked 2 days a week and was paid for the 2 days (last year I was working 40-50 hours a week)
I don't know what to tell you except to look for another job. They will continue to take advantage of you. I know, I am there too sista! I am going to be done with this family (and I LOVE the little girl...and actually the mom and dad are pretty great, they just don't pay enough or any extras) in Sept and then I am not watching anyone else's kids. It seems to be kind of a thankless job most of the time.
I don't know if you can do anything about it. Did you sign a contract when you got hired? Do you get paid a paycheck every week or are you paid under the table? I don't think it's law for sick time or vacation time, I believe those are not required.
i am sorry you are in this position. Get out now!
L.

Sounds like you need to find a new job. If you continue as a nanny, do as daycare providers do and draft a contract that states what your pay and work day/times are. You can also leave a little room for extras but not as open ended as you have been. Daycares hold spots for childres, parents pay for that spot even when the child is not there (unless the daycare is able to fill it and they may choose not to but that is at their discretion). As for the compsation for the vacation, it really should hvave been discussed a long time ago since you have worked there so long or at least before the trip, not after. Good luck.

why do you want an option that doesn't include leaving these ingrates? if they are really as bad as you say, what are the advantages to staying? from what you say they don't pay much, don't treat with you consideration or appreciation, and the kids are horrid.
i doubt you'll find any laws in your favor since you don't have a contract. chalk this one up to experience, and go teach dance or find a new family to work for.
there are plenty of 'em out there.
and remember.....you can't be a doormat unless you lie down.
khairete
S.