Naming Your Baby

Updated on August 12, 2010
M.!. asks from Boulder, CO
25 answers

Why is naming your child sooo hard. We are expecting baby # 3 and each child has gotten harder and harder to decide. At the beginning of this pregnancy we thought we had the perfect names, but since have started doubting ourselves. We have allowed so much outside influence into the baby naming thing that we now are not sure if we have the right name or not. Our girl name is McKenzie Rose and our boy name is Nicholai Michael. So many people have commented on the boy name being the name of a demean from a book and I just cant get over it. My own MIL doesn't care for our names and that is hard swallow.

Have you allowed outside influence to pick your childs name - or did you just name your baby whatever you wanted?

Thanks!

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J.C.

answers from Indianapolis on

I have to say first off that one of my sons is Lucas Nikolai Antonio so no, I don't think Nikolai is a demon at all, he's my angel :) I let my kids' father help pick a name, but otherwise told ppl oh well, they had their chances to pick names, this is my chance.

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K.N.

answers from Cleveland on

After 3 kids, and a lot of people telling me how much they hated my names for all of them, not to mention the ideas we have for baby number 4, I gave up. he has a name, but I haven't even told my kids because i don't want them to tell anyone. After the baby comes and is named, no one will say it's a terrible name. They all got over it with my first 3. By the way I love both choices. We settled on Hayden Nathaniel, but shhhhh don't tell. LOL

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K.A.

answers from Little Rock on

I just named them what I wanted. I named my all with the initials VM. Vadin Mark, Vance Mickel, Valena Marie. My aunt threw a fit and said she was going to just call them V1,V2,V3. She doesn't and even if she did, I don't care. My inlaws love the names of my second 2 because they come close to family names. The names of Michael and Marie come from much loved family members although I did not know that when I chose them. My dad bragged that he was born in Vadin, Arkansas after my son was born, a fact that I also did not know when I chose the name. If it helps any, I love the names you have picked out.

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

We chose what we wanted, but we refused to share with anyone until the baby was born and named officially. We didn't want anyone's opinion and figured most people are much less likely to share their thoughts about names once the baby's born. We just told askers that we hadn't decided yet. I couldn't care less who likes my kids' names- the important part was that we loved them! Choose your own, and politely tell those with opinions about the names that you're not interested in hearing their thoughts!

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Just name your child as you/Hubby wish.

It is not up to other people's inclinations or hang-ups.
There are hang-ups about any name, per each person and culture... you can't please everyone.
It is YOUR child... not theirs.

If you Google Search "baby name meanings"... you can also find out what the 'meaning' of a name is.... that is what we did to name our children. We chose a name, ourselves. Not according to other relatives opinions.
Our kids, have names which reflect their cultural heritage... both mine and my Hubby's which are different cultures. My kids LOVE their names.

good luck,
Susan

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

We had a few "outside" influences, mostly family due to the timing of my pregnancy.

At first we just decided to go with families names that weren't too immediate. As it turned out Naomi (My mom's second name) and Christine (MIL first name and favorite book character) worked out well. It also helped smooth the ruffled feathers of my ultra conservative MIL.

Do what makes you happy.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

We told no one what we were naming our daughter until after she was born.

I did not want a cutesy name where there would be 3-4 kids in the same class with the name. I didn't want a trendy or odd spelled name either.

I thought about my daughter as a child and adult with her name because I can't see some 80 yr olds with these trendy, cutesy names.

We went with Erin Melissa and there are no Erin's in her class of over 800 students. Occasionally, we'll see the name.

You can't live your life to please others......do what is right for YOU. You don't owe anyone explanations.

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M.W.

answers from Chicago on

There's a good book out there called Baby Name Wizard (I think there's a website too...not sure of the web address)- it even suggests sibling names based on the names of the child(ren) you already have - pretty neat!

My son is Nicholas and Nicholai is such a cool name (I don't know any demons by that name!). I didn't let anyone influence our decision...Nicholas is our child therefore we are entitled to naming rights! Don't let anyone bring you down - the names you chose are very nice!

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

My fil (we were never married but I'm close to the family) still doesn't like my sons name 7 years later. I love it and am so happy I picked it....even Ug it is the same name as the boy from pet cemetery. I get so many compliments and he's normally the only one with his name which he likes.

1 mom found this helpful

M.H.

answers from Raleigh on

Our family knows our names, and they have voiced their opinions, but in the end, it is what my hubby and I choose that matters. My mom doesn't like the name Callie (one of the girl names in the running hopefully someday), but she also knows that if that is what we choose, it is our choice. She had her chance with all of her children, now it's our turn to name ours! Both names are lovely, so I say stick with them if YOU and YOUR HUBBY like them!!!

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A.C.

answers from Cincinnati on

What book has a demon named Nicholai ? I'm not familiar with that book.

But I think your biggest problem was sharing your name choices. I told my mother, because she and I are very close, but no one else knows the names we are considering. Then we don't get any input, good or bad. The choice is entirely ours. Stop telling people your name choices, stop talking about it with those who already know, and when your baby comes, look at him or her and decide if the name suits or not. Then, if anyone is tacky enough to comment on the name after you have given it to your child, look them straight in the eye and say, "Why would you say such a thing?" Good luck.

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

I like the name :) Its cute and it doesn't matter what you choose to name YOUR child. You and your hubby have to like it :) My MIL and SIL's were terrible about what we wanted to name our son, we both liked Matthew James and they HATED it, saying he was gonna be nicknamed "door Matt" -- luckily for me, we weren't that close so I didn't care, they had their own children they have been able to name, it was our turn. On the other hand, we were worried about what my mother ((usually VERY opinionated about that kind of stuff)) would say and believe it or not, she didn't say anything, just that when she was naming us, her parents didn't pass judgment on what she chose to name us. :)

1 mom found this helpful

L.M.

answers from Dover on

The only thing that influenced the naming our children was the stubborness of their father! With my son, I wanted to name him Matthew James (his father did not want a jr) so I selected this name and then just before my due date he decided he did want a jr...Michael Andrew it is. I later fell in love with Cheyenne Nicole and knew that is what I wanted to name a girl if I had one. My second husband didn't want that and came up with all kinds of weird sounding names and others that had Nicole as the middle name. Cheyenne is what I was really set on. I finally compromised...Madison Cheyenne (we call her Cheyenne).

Others ideas were completely irrelevant. You get to name your children just as your parents got to name you. If they allowed someone else to name you that was still their decision!

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C.F.

answers from Rochester on

Nicholai is the name of the anti-Christ in "The Left Behind" book series, so that's where that is coming from. It's a very well known book series amongst Christians. If it weren't for that, I'd like the name, too. McKenzie is a very popular name (a lot of Mc names are popular now). If that doesn't bother you, then go with it. If it does bother you, maybe Rose McKenzie would be a better choice (Rose isn't a popular first name right now). The bottom line is it is your decision, and other people will have to deal with whatever you name him/her. I think it is good to get constructive criticism/opinions because it allows you to have all the information and be confident of your choice so you don't have regrets later. You aren't going to please everyone.

When I was pregnant with my daughter we had a list of our favorite names and didn't decide on her name until she was born. I wanted to see what she looked like before we made a final decision. We probably would have narrowed it down sooner, but my husband wanted one name, and I wanted another. We ended up scrapping both and naming her one of the names that was in our top 5 from the very beginning. We got suggestions and comments from family/friends, but we chose on our own. It's one of the privileges of being a parent- so enjoy it! =)

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L.

answers from Cleveland on

I have a Meredith Rose, so I really like that one.
I would go with Nickolas rathaer than Nicolai, but you will probably call him Nick anyway and how could you go wrong with Michael?
I was told to go to the back door and scream out the names so you could hear how it sounded when you yelled at the kid!

So now you have another opinion...has it helped??

I wouldn't tell anyone the names until you and hubby decide and the child is here. It's really not their business.

Good luck to you.

1 mom found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Houston on

i never listen to others comments about names, none of their beezwax, I named my daughters Gwendolynn and Lilly, and they are both misspelled, its you who is having the baby, and you who gets to decide. My family did not like my second daughters name, oh well, they learned to love it.

btw, i LOVE the name Nicholai, i have never heard it before, (demon or no demon) its quite cute. its not like your son will be evil because some author picked a unique neat sounded name for his evil character (damien is quite a pretty name, but has been ruined by that movie omen), its a shame

Oh and a friend of our ruined our pick for boys names by teasing us mercilously about it, i have always wanted to name a boy "Gage", but we heard so many jokes, 12 gage, tire gauge....etc... it ruined the name for us

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B.

answers from Augusta on

Both names are beautiful.
I haven't ever let outside people influence to pick my child's name.
Mine are Brianna Elizabeth and Jayson Ian.

1 mom found this helpful

Y.C.

answers from New York on

Let me tell you about my story with names.
I name my fist child all on my own and it took me for ever to pick a name, I actually didn't name her until she was around 5 months, my family will bug me about it but I wanted the perfect name. Finally I pick Fernanda, which in Mexico is a nice name but in here is not very comun. Worst of all, for the past 2 years my daughter has decide call herself Fern (like the plant!!). When I pick her up from camp I was looking for her and asking for her but everybody will say: Fernanda? Oh, you mean Fern.
Seriously?
Then came my baby number #2, my husband already had the name since day 1 (not day one that she born, day one of me telling him I was pregnant!), do I was happy with the name? Well, he pick her middle name from one of his Comic magazines (Quinn) and I can't even pronounce her name right with my heavy accent!
But after 2 years I look at her and it just feel right, I can't imagine her being call any other name.
We don't even know if we will have more kids but he already has the next name for a girl...yeah right!
I don't know what book are they talking about it but I really like Nicholai.

H.V.

answers from Cleveland on

I Have only told my Mom what I plan on naming my soon to be born baby.
Otherwise I don't tell other people because I know some people are rude.
My sister told people what she wanted to name her 1st son and she actually had people tell her it was a "stupid name"
So I keep it to myself

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L.M.

answers from New York on

Naming our children was so easy...

Hubby is the seventh, so if a boy he would have been the eigth, (only 2 girls)

For the first ... On my mother's side we use the name Ann, so we knew if it was a girl the middle name would be Ann, for her first name I was reading down a list of the top 50 names, the first one that I came to that my hubby and I both said "I like it", that was it, no turning back. My MIL was very upset that we didn't choose a name from hubby's hertitage.

For the second... We both liked the name Cristina (a bonus, it's from hubby's hertitage to make MIL happy), but needed a middle name. I wanted her to have a family middle name, so one day in the car, I was thinking of the first letters of each of the names of the babies 3 grandmothers. I put them together and that became her first name, and Cristina her middle name. This was about 4 months into the pregnancy.

Just remember, the only ones that need to like the child's name are you and hubby.

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

These kind of comments and opinions are one of the main reasons why we didn't tell anyone what our children were named until after their birth. We just didn't want added stress to an already daunting decision. Whether they liked our name choices or not, it's hard to complain after the fact :) And although it really drove some people absolutely bonkers, it was also nice to have a surprise/announcement after the birth. Good luck!!

M.P.

answers from Provo on

When I was a kid I had a billion animals and I never got to name any of them. That was my mom's job. She would even change them when I named one. So when it came to naming my baby she pushed and pushed and PUSHED to help pick out my son's name. H.E. double hockey sticks NO!!!!!!! It's my turn. Which Ironically was one of our dogs name, but I didn't think about that till after I chose it.

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T.B.

answers from New York on

It's your choice---your baby---that's that!
Why not Nico or Nicholas?--Boy
Girl--McKenna Rose

Congrats!

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K.A.

answers from Pittsburgh on

You've received several responses and I agree that you should name your child what you and your husband love. Not by what anyone else thinks. My only suggestion would be to try and picture you child with that name as a teen, young adult, parent, grandparent etc.....There are so many names that are cute when they are young, but seem to become outgrown as they get older. I'm going through the same thing right now. I'm trying to come up with a name that is cute for an infant, but sophisticated and ageless as well. Good Luck.

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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I don't have anything new to add, I agree with most other posters. Name your baby what you and your husband like best. You picked the names for a reason, just remember that. The two of you would not have decided on the names if you didn't LOVE them. I have known a few people that were talked out of naming their baby what they wanted because of public opinion and always regretted it. Not that they weren't happy with what they did choose, but had wished they had not told any one and gone with the first choice. A friend now expecting #3 never told any one the baby's name until it was born. Her and the hubby decided and all else had to wait. When I was expecting mine, I never cared what any one else thought, I only cared what hubby and I thought. They are your children and as long as you are happy with the names that is all that matters.

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