DD will not take a normal nap during the day. She cat naps while I am nursing her and when I go to move her she wakes right up. She was napping for 2 hours in the swing but now she won't even do that. I know she is tired because she is very cranky and is constantly rubbing her eyes. She cries all day long because she won't nap. I am really at my wit's end with this. I've tried putting her in her crib and letting her cry but she just screams her head off. I have a mobile on the crib, it doesn't work. Nothing seems to be working. Please any sugesstions would be most appreciated.
Thank you all for your suggestions. I will definitely give them a try. The last 2 days she has been a little better. I've had to put her in the car or walk her in the stroller but at least she is getting some sleep and not crying all day. I will probably end up using Ferber even thought I will hate hearing her cry. Thanks again.
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We went through went you're going through, so I totally understand your frustration. When I was at the end of my rope, I would put her in the car and drive around just so that she would nap a little bit. Do you swaddle? Swaddling really helped my daughter learn to nap during the day. We would swaddle her at night, but not during the day - that was one of those "duh" moments for us. Also, I second the white noise. Even though Sophie is 14 months old, we still use it. During the winter we use a humidifier and now we have a window unit AC on. It also helps drown out noises as well. One more thing....at 4 months old, Sophie was on a 2 hour schedule - meaning she was awake for 2 hours max before a nap. I was strict with this and it really seemed to help once she got into the pattern. Good luck!!!
Hi W.. I know EXACTLY what you're going through- my DD did the same thing at 4 months old and it was horrible!!!!
I don't know if you against crying it out but I'll tell you exactly what I did....and it worked and I still use it today for those inevitable "sleep bumps" every child goes through.
First, take a deep breath.....It's going to be ok. Your DD is overtired and it is NOT healthy for her...as I'm sure you've figured out. Children need sleep in order to grow and process what they've learned while they've been awake.
My DD used to fall asleep at the breast too and per order of my doctor, I kept her awake by gently shaking her or taking her off and flicking her feet. Any sort of cat nap before can ruin naptime so I kept her awake and I put my DD in her crib drowsy but awake after developing a predictable routine (diaper change, book, kiss goodnight after closing our room darkening drapes and turning on the fan for white noise), then I closed the door and let her cry. Normally it is recommended to go in after 5 minutes and tell her "sleep time honey" but not to pick her up or touch her- it is strictly to reassure her w/ your voice, then the next time go in at 10 minutes, and if she is still crying, go in the next time at 15 minutes. Then continue to check in every 15 minutes if she is crying (however, for us it just made my dd mad! so we left her alone to figure out how to soothe herself). We kept her in her crib for an hour to begin with and if she didn't sleep we took her out and tried again in another hour (we gradually upped her time to practice sootheing herself to 1 1/2 hours because she could outlast the hour time frame). If she did fall asleep (even at the very end of the hour) we let her sleep up to 2 hours from the time she fell asleep. Like I said.. keeping a written record will help track when she went down and how long she slept.
At this age a 4 month old is going to need 3 naps a day of at least 1 hour (no more than 2 hours though or it interferes with the next nap). I know the first couple of days will be the hardest but it is so WORTH it!! My daughter actually started sleeping 1 1/2 hours 3x a day and sleeping 12 hours at night and she is still a great sleeper to this day!
I highly recommend getting the book The Sleepeasy Solution By Jennifer Waldburger. If you use this method and are consistent you WILL see results in a day or two and her sleep should smooth out almost completely after a week. It is an amazing system and it gives you solutions for sleep problems up to age 5 so it is a great resource to refer back to as well.
So here it is-
1) Develop a consistent routine. (room darkening drapes and white noise are also a plus!)
2) Place child in crib and do your check ins (if it doesnt make her mad) at 5, then 10, then 15 minute intervals.
3) Keep a written record of when she went down for nap, how long she slept ect....
4)Naps for this age should be 3x/ day for a minimum of 1 hour and maximum of 2 hours from the time she falls asleep.
5) It is hard to hear her cry but remember: You are giving her a chance to practice an important skill- falling asleep on her own and you're letting her do it in a safe, comfortable environment! She will not remember this and she will not hold it against you!
Ok- I hope this helps! This is tough the first couple of days but it is so good for them to learn how to fall asleep on their own- it is a skill they need to develop and our job is to help them. The book explains all these points much better than I can in this post so I hope you'll check it out.
Best of luck!
I don't know if this is of any help but around that age my daughter suddenly would only nap in the car or in the sling (I had one made by Hot Slings). I started giving in because I was at the end of my rope but thought for sure it was going to result in her only sleeping when she was being "held." However, I'm happy to report that only lasted about 3 or 4 weeks and she resumed taking regular naps in her crib and is now 7 months old and (knock on wood) has no problems napping at all.
Hi, at that age, to get my LO to sleep, I did a lot of walking the neighborhood with the stroller. As he got sleepy, I would lay the stroller back flat and eventually he would fall asleep in the stroller while we walked. I would actually just leave him in there and sit on my back porch while he slept (he would wake if I tried to move him).
I also used the baby front pack a lot at that age. Again, he would fall asleep while I walked around the house doing chores. Every now and then I could move him from the Snuggly to the crib, but usually I just let him nap right where he was.
Once he got back into the routine of napping, using the stroller or the front pack, I gradually moved him back to his crib or swing for naps.
Every baby is different, hopefully you'll get enough advice that you'll hit on something that works for you!
Good luck!
Have you tried a sling or wrap carrier when she's cranky? My little girl was never a consistent sleeper, a very high needs spirited little girl from day one, a lot of the time (especially through the consistent sleep habit changes) she needed to be close to me and a sling or wearing her in a wrap put her right to sleep (and i can still get stuff done...like taking care of 8 foster children). And it still works today at age 2 on the crabbiest of toddler days! Blessings and Peace for you Momma!
If you google "4 month wakeful period" you'll find this is really common!
My youngest did the exact same thing. If I could get him to nap at home in bed he'd take maybe 2 thirty or forty minute naps. He looked awful, red eyes, cranky, etc. What I did (mostly by accident and mostly because we have an older son) was tank him up all morning (TONS Of nursing!) and keep him really busy. When my oldest went down for his nap at around 12-1 I would nurse Auggie in our bed and gently transfer him into his bed. I left one of our old (unwashed) pillow cases in his crib. I am not sure if was because he was SO exhausted, so comfortable, or comforted by our pillow case. I don't really care, it worked. He's 11 months now and he still take one 3 hour nap everyday. I'm fine with that.
My sister drove her daughter around in the car for a specific period of time to get her body used to falling asleep and napping at certain times. Then she rocked her to sleep for a period of time and gradually got her to sleep on her own in her crib after a month or so. Maybe try that if nothing else works.
Good luck! I know how much we ALL need naptime.
We've gone through a couple of these phases in the past 4 1/2 months with our little girl. These phases seemed to have been caused by a couple of different things, depending on the age/phase she was in.
1. One discovery was that she wasn't nursing long enough to get to the fat in the hindmilk. That happened during the first month of nursing, but I began pumping and bottle-feeding her to get her to drink more completely. Now she'll nurse to the hindmilk or drink the bottle to the end. When she was going through growth spurts, it was worse with the nap-less days.
2. She is REALLY active constantly during the day (barrel rolling, trying to sit, crawl, walk, and stand), and thus the doctor told us at her 2-month appointment that we should start solids with her at 3-4 months. Between the 3 solid meals a day plus 6ish nursings a day, she usually naps 2 or 3 times for about 45 minutes each time, goes to bed at 10, sleeps 6-8 hours a night, and often goes back to sleep in the morning for another few hours in the morning. She refused to be swaddled, even from the beginning. Now that she's sleeping better at night, she naps better during the day - go figure...
3. She has also been teething for the last month and a half, which has caused occasional bouts of crabbiness and nap-less days.
4. She also had colic for a while, which caused crazy nap-less screaming days/nights. The front carrier, walking with her in a stroller, draping her belly-down across the arm, and pacifiers were the only things that worked to get her to sleep. Now, she rolls herself over to sleep belly-down all the time. She'll still sleep in the carrier and stroller. She won't take a pacifier now, which is fine.
5. Now that she's much more aware of sounds/activity, she sometimes has a hard time calming down from the sensory stimulations. Eventually, she just got used to it, but it caused some nap-lessness too.
Again, I don't know if any of this applies to your situation, but perhaps something will help. Best wishes!!!!
First of all try a swing. That really helped when my son was that young. Another thing that was good was the boppy vibrating seat. It makes different sounds including the heart beat. That was my sons favorite one and it helped him go to sleep. She probably sleeps well on you because the sound of the heart beat and your scent soothes her. The boppy seat is sold in target. It has a strap to hold her in. It is $50 but it is worth your sanity. Your could probably buy a swing at a flea market or consignment store.
Good luck... It will get better
Hi W.,
When our 2nd daughter was 4 months, we began to use the Ferber method. I would've never used it with my 1st daughter because it made me cry to hear her cry. However, with my 2nd came a more desperate need for sleep. I can honestly say that it wasn't bad at all! Before the first week was over, she was going to sleep on her own in her crib. The first couple nights were rough (she cried up to half an hour), but she quickly caught on. THe main thing is to be consistent. Good luck!
